"you have such a pretty face"

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  • Kathy53925
    Kathy53925 Posts: 241 Member
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    That's what i've ALWAYS heard.... I can't wait for the day when people tell me "you're so pretty" ...not just that I have a pretty face.

    That's one of my biggest motivators!


    I had one guy at a party years ago say...You are so beautiful! Why don't you lose weight so men can be attracted to you? I was a bit shocked..just said..oh thanks! He acted dumbfounded! HAH !!
  • Romans624
    Romans624 Posts: 822
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    In my profile pic I have on a HIP blue eyeliner that I love :-)

    Your eyes look gorgeous, and I would say that the navy is subtle in the pic - I didn't notice it but your beautiful eyes.

    Didn't see your comment til now.
  • Romans624
    Romans624 Posts: 822
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    I get told this.

    I also get told (only by women) that I have pretty makeup. Feels like a slap.

    if it makes you feel better, i think you wear too much makeup. ;)

    If you mean I don't need it, that is a super sweet thing to say! Thank you :)
  • LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo
    LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo Posts: 3,634 Member
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    I always hear people say that I'm pretty or cute but not a hottie :sad:
  • Romans624
    Romans624 Posts: 822
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    I always hear people say that I'm pretty or cute but not a hottie :sad:

    If I may, you ARE a hottie esp in that bikini! Really! I usually don't called stuff like that either unless I dress really girly.
  • louised88
    louised88 Posts: 159
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    I get told this.

    I also get told (only by women) that I have pretty makeup. Feels like a slap.

    yikessssss.....that would probably make me cry inside. :(


    I'm not trying to be rude, but can you articulate what bothers you about it? I know I actually prefer compliments on my make-up/clothes to being told I'm pretty, because a) eff off, I didn't ask for your opinion on my body/face and b) I actually deliberately put effort in and created the look with make-up, so I feel like I'm complimented on an ability/effort/something I deliberately created rather than something genetics did all by itself. Same with outfits, I'd much prefer someone said "I love how you put that together!" rather than "It makes your boobs/waist/*kitten* look good."

    Again, I'm not trying to be snarky or invalidate your feelings, I'd just love to get some perspective from someone who's approaching the same situation from a different angle!

    EDITED TO FIX QUOTE!
  • louised88
    louised88 Posts: 159
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    This guy like Big *kitten* and Pretty faces and Big round Boobies!

    Nothing wrong with a woman with a little meat on her bones.

    My grandfather used to say in Italian, Translated,

    meat is for the man, bones are for the DOG!!!

    OMG, I LOVE that "quote" ;) No matter how much weight I lose I DO NOT want to lose my curves and my ability to be thought of as womanly, that's one of my favorite things about women! Glad you posted this ;)

    I actually think that quote is equally offensive.

    Why must we bring down others in order to make ourselves feel better?

    Curvy women are great, yes. Nothing wrong with that at all. But this whole shaming of skinny women in order to make bigger women feel better is bull. I have a few friends who are naturally very skinny, and they gorgeous as well. If someone says "bones are gorgeous, fat is disgusting," they're being offensive and are called out for being fat-shaming d*ckbags. Which is fair enough. Why is the reverse any more acceptable? It certainly shouldn't be.

    The whole "real women have curves" mantra makes me want to punch people, I'm not gonna lie. Real women are all women. Skinny, fat, cisgender, transgender, whatever. If you're a woman then you're a woman and no matter what size you are, you're gorgeous.

    THIS, SO MUCH! I see a lot of talk about 'real women' around here and most of it is super male-gazey and it's really unpleasant to read. THANK YOU FOR THIS POST!
  • ilovemybuggy
    ilovemybuggy Posts: 1,584 Member
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    OMG story of my life... followed by me awkwardly saying, um.. thanks? I actually had an older woman tell me once, "you have such a pretty face, just don't get any bigger, ok?" and another one (I guess older, wealthy women feel it's ok to say this) say "You have such a pretty face - it's a shame you're so obese. But if you lost weight, you'd be so pretty!" (she stood there smiling like I was going to thank her).

    :noway: People are so AWFUL!!!! It would have taken everything in me not to cuss them out!
  • trophywife24
    trophywife24 Posts: 1,472 Member
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    "You have a pretty face" is like the "bless your heart" of compliments. It's crappy and stupid and everyone knows that it means "too bad the rest of you doesn't match"
  • ilovemybuggy
    ilovemybuggy Posts: 1,584 Member
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    Wow! Thank you everyone for your responses- I'm glad to see i'm not alone in this. However, I do want to clarify that when i'm complimented, in any way, whether I feel like it's a backhanded compliment or not. I always say thank you. Even if REALLY, I'd like to smack some sense into them. People are cruel- and no matter WHAT you look like (skinny, athletic, fat, etc) SOMEONE is always going to have something negative to say. I think the most important thing that we all take out of our journey- is to appreciate OUR hard work/efforts and APPRECIATE who we are; as long as WE love OURSELF- that's really all that matters! <3

    :flowerforyou: to you all!
  • amyadell
    amyadell Posts: 46 Member
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    Well, for the most part all I can see is a face in our little icons... So... You all really DO have pretty faces!!! ;P
    ... And for the few exceptions of pictures I guess I have to say "you have pretty boobs?" Haha!!!
    I always just feel thankful for my pretty face because even when I gain some weight and get all upset with myself, I STILL have that! Put on some makeup (not that we need it), do a pretty ponytail and get your *kitten* in gear... That's what me and my pretty face are doing! ;P
  • ilovemybuggy
    ilovemybuggy Posts: 1,584 Member
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    Well, you know, just from your icon photo, it is a true statement nonetheless.

    It's context...

    Thank you! :)
  • Sugarhoneyicedtea
    Sugarhoneyicedtea Posts: 76
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    I always say thank you, as well. It's only when people follow it up with something else that it bothers me. Or flat out say, "You know, you'd be so much more attractive if you'd just try to lose weight." Thank you, person that doesn't know me and doesn't know that I am actually working to lose weight, and have lose some (30 lbs since I had my daughter). One time, I asked a friend of mine why he didn't ask me if I wanted something from where he was going out to eat, and he replied, "It looks like you already ate enough." Wow, thanks dude.

    Okay, enough QQing from me!
  • ilovemybuggy
    ilovemybuggy Posts: 1,584 Member
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    I always say thank you, as well. It's only when people follow it up with something else that it bothers me. Or flat out say, "You know, you'd be so much more attractive if you'd just try to lose weight." Thank you, person that doesn't know me and doesn't know that I am actually working to lose weight, and have lose some (30 lbs since I had my daughter). One time, I asked a friend of mine why he didn't ask me if I wanted something from where he was going out to eat, and he replied, "It looks like you already ate enough." Wow, thanks dude.

    Okay, enough QQing from me!

    WOW, A FRIEND SAID THAT?!?! Great friend :grumble:
  • SpazzyMal
    SpazzyMal Posts: 276 Member
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    I hate this. It's not so much that the compliment itself is bad... it's that it is, essentially, the only compliment I have ever gotten, ever. You have a pretty face. You have beautiful blue eyes. Your smile is great. It's all about one area of the body, which draws attention to the fact they're clearly not impressed with... anything else.

    I hate being called cute, too. I might even hate that more than being told I have a pretty face. It makes me feel not only fat, but specifically undesirable. Childish, even. Again — it's not the compliment itself that's bad, so much as the fact it's the only way I have ever been described.

    Lack of variety hurts.

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