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relationships and F***ing up

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  • Posts: 110 Member
    Two reasons:

    The cheater:

    1) has a lack of self-esteem

    2) is narcissistic
  • Posts: 149
    If it reaches the point of cheating, then the relationship is over.. Nobody in love with someone would violate a true partner if they were happy. Move on then you can sleep with who you want.. Before you cheat. Show some respect.
  • Posts: 248 Member
    With another friend I have, his wife and he have not had sex in 2.5 years. He's ready to cheat and has seriously been thinking about it.

    Sometimes, it is the other person causing it.

    They have kids, so he doesn't want out of the relationship, but he does want to have sex. And, he wants sex with his wife, but she just wont do it. So...what's a guy to do?

    Be honest with her and tell her that if she doesn't give it up, he is thinking of cheating!! Ask her to go to counseling and try to work on the marriage!!
  • Posts: 412 Member
    With another friend I have, his wife and he have not had sex in 2.5 years. He's ready to cheat and has seriously been thinking about it.

    Sometimes, it is the other person causing it.

    They have kids, so he doesn't want out of the relationship, but he does want to have sex. And, he wants sex with his wife, but she just wont do it. So...what's a guy to do?

    Why not be honest with her, if she isn't interested in it either, maybe she doesn't care if it has a one night stand if their relationship has more to it.

    My problem is with the need to lie and sneak about it.

    If she has a problem with it, maybe its time they both moved on?
  • Posts: 3,845 Member
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    Why would you break up with someone you love just because you want to have sex with someone else? I don't get it?

    I don't know if you're serious or not, but my next relationship will be open to that idea. It really doesn't matter. I feel humans are sexual and monogamous relationships are just silly and not intended for humans. It hasn't worked for me so far.
  • Posts: 1,374 Member
    I think one reason people cheat is because they do not accept that temptation is a normal part of being human. I have been very tempted sexually at various times and even more so now that I have lost weight. However, I admit and accept temptation is just a momentary desire for physical gratification which is far less valuable to me than the eternal love I have with my wife. I think if we are honest about temptation and even allow ourselves to flirt safely then we are far more productive in our actual relationships. Attraction to someone is normal, cheating is not.


    Love this answer!! So true...Everyone is tempted at times but if you truly love who you are with then that is all it will be - A temptation and will go no farther than that....

    If you do to cheat then you shouldn't be with the person that you have been with b/c he/she WILL find out and it will ruin what you have together...Is it really worth it for a piece of *kitten*??....My opinion!!
  • Posts: 520
    ITS SO FUN! LIKE I LOVE MCDONALDS CHEESEBURGERS AND FRIES. OMG SOOOO YUMMY OMG OMG OMG BUT SOMETIMES? I WANT TO GO EAT AT WENDYS OR BURGER KING. STILL A CHEESEBURGER BUT DIFFERENT TASTE. ITS NICE TO TASTE DIFFERENT CHEESBURGERS OMG OMG OMG BESIDE ZOMG ITS NATURAL TO STRAY OF COURSE HA HA HAHA

    I would have referenced TACOS in this senario but burgers work, yo.
  • Posts: 880 Member
    I wonder how many people are doctors in here......
  • Posts: 140
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    Why would you break up with someone you love just because you want to have sex with someone else? I don't get it?

    I really hope you are just trolling.
  • Posts: 412 Member
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    I would have referenced TACOS in this senario but burgers work, yo.

    But will the Big Mac still respect me in the morning?
  • Posts: 520
    show previous quotes

    I don't know if you're serious or not, but my next relationship will be open to that idea. It really doesn't matter. I feel humans are sexual and monogamous relationships are just silly and not intended for humans. It hasn't worked for me so far.

    So what you are saying is you are switching to a diffrent species?
  • Posts: 1,428 Member
    I think one reason people cheat is because they do not accept that temptation is a normal part of being human. I have been very tempted sexually at various times and even more so now that I have lost weight. However, I admit and accept temptation is just a momentary desire for physical gratification which is far less valuable to me than the eternal love I have with my wife. I think if we are honest about temptation and even allow ourselves to flirt safely then we are far more productive in our actual relationships. Attraction to someone is normal, cheating is not.

    I like this answer lol It pretty much sums things up!
  • Posts: 3,845 Member
    show previous quotes

    Why not be honest with her, if she isn't interested in it either, maybe she doesn't care if it has a one night stand if their relationship has more to it.

    My problem is with the need to lie and sneak about it.

    If she has a problem with it, maybe its time they both moved on?

    I wont get into their drama. There's obviously years of *kitten* between them. They both talk very openly and honestly about things. I think they need to move on. But, they're hanging on for the kids. But, she does mind if he cheats.
  • Posts: 1,757 Member
    I'm just not one of those people that believes we were meant to mate for life either. I, myself, am mongamish. We are designed to be attracted to one another, not just one. It's society and religion (quick, go grab your popcorn, I just said the 'R' word) that have put these expectations on us. Believe it or not, the whole world does not believe as the US typically does.

    I can be with my bf, in a long term, committed relationship. 'Committed relationship' means I'm committed to sharing my life with him, NOT committed to him being the last man on earth I ever sleep with - or woman, for that matter! I also don't expect him to be with only me. He has every right to be with any woman he so chooses. If people would just loosen up, quit putting their insecurities before their partner's basic needs, there wouldn't be a 52% divorce rate in the US!

    ...and let the bashing begin...
  • Posts: 412 Member
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    I really hope you are just trolling.

    This is the era of "friends with benefits", just so long as everyone knows they aren't the only friend. It only has to work for those involved. But you have to tell everyone involved
  • Posts: 248 Member
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    Why would you break up with someone you love just because you want to have sex with someone else? I don't get it?

    Because it is disgusting and completely unfair to the spouse you are cheating on. What if you contract a disease or get the other person pregnant! that is just F*** up!!
  • Posts: 1,757 Member
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    Sometimes I just feel like having a taco.
    I love tacos!
  • Posts: 193 Member
    Disrespect for themselves and their partner. Insensitivity. Or perhaps they want to create excitement, drama in their lives.
  • Posts: 1,757 Member
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    Because it is disgusting and completely unfair to the spouse you are cheating on. What if you contract a disease or get the other person pregnant! that is just F*** up!!
    That's what condoms were invented for!
  • Posts: 869 Member
    With another friend I have, his wife and he have not had sex in 2.5 years. He's ready to cheat and has seriously been thinking about it.

    Sometimes, it is the other person causing it.

    They have kids, so he doesn't want out of the relationship, but he does want to have sex. And, he wants sex with his wife, but she just wont do it. So...what's a guy to do?

    I have a friend who was in the same boat. I kept telling him to talk to his wife. If she doesn't want to have sex, then I told him to ask her for permission to get it from someone else. That freaked her out and so now she gives him sex.
  • Posts: 520
    show previous quotes

    Because it is disgusting and completely unfair to the spouse you are cheating on. What if you contract a disease or get the other person pregnant! that is just F*** up!!

    Sharing is caring.
  • Posts: 190
    I think if people were more relaxed and not so insecure it wouldn't be just another pleasure to enjoy in this life. But we have so many damn rules in society to make us feel safe. People have been "cheating' since the dawn on mankind. There's your sign ... yes, its only I one opinion :blushing:

    Edit to WOULD BE A PLEASURE!
  • Posts: 64
    I'm 46 and have told my husband several times he can trade me in for (2) 23 yr olds if he wants.

    Just gimme a couple days notice.

    He said he's put in 24 years already, might was well stick around to see what happens.


    ;-)
  • Posts: 190
    I think if people were more relaxed and not so insecure it would be just another pleasure to enjoy in this life. But we have so many damn rules in society to make us feel safe. People have been "cheating' since the dawn on mankind. There's your sign ... yes, its only I one opinion :blushing:
  • Posts: 880 Member
    Cheat on me once, whatever. Cheat on me again...I'll f**king bury you :smokin: Sounds like a deal to me! :wink:
  • Posts: 682 Member
    this may be the first time ever that I have sensored myself . . .
  • Posts: 777 Member
    I have two different answers I would like to bring up, and most people will agree with one or the other ;-)

    First, from a Biblical perspective, we live in a fallen world where sin is running rampant. We are selfish and care more about ourselves and what makes us happy versus the other person. We don't think about our actions and how they are displeasing to our Creator (God) We have numbed our conscious to feel that what we are doing is okay.

    The second option is we are selfish and care more about ourselves and what makes us happy versus the other person! =)
  • Posts: 193 Member
    You can't a fault a person for cheating if they're upgrading. lol

    Also, this, however unsettling, is true. It is our human nature to constantly search for prospective partners. We have a CHOICE to act on these impulses but we are only our DNA. Hopefully we will evolve. I saw something on Facebook about this> we live in a culture that throws everything away. The computer goes black, so we buy a new one. We don't tinker around and figure out what is wrong with it. We don't fix things.
  • Posts: 888 Member
    show previous quotes

    Yes I can. Upgrade all you want - after you break up with your current partner.

    Agree~!
  • Posts: 1,757 Member
    I have two different answers I would like to bring up, and most people will agree with one or the other ;-)

    First, from a Biblical perspective, we live in a fallen world where sin is running rampant. We are selfish and care more about ourselves and what makes us happy versus the other person. We don't think about our actions and how they are displeasing to our Creator (God) We have numbed our conscious to feel that what we are doing is okay.

    The second option is we are selfish and care more about ourselves and what makes us happy versus the other person! =)
    Actually those are the same answers, and no, I don't agree with either!
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