Sleeping in seperate beds, what do you think?

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  • solarpower03
    solarpower03 Posts: 12,161 Member
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    Always been separate room and separate bed!
  • LisaH1967
    LisaH1967 Posts: 332 Member
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    My hubby and I sleep in seperate rooms only because he has a HORRIBLE snoring problem. Not sure I would like having 2 beds in the same room though. To me that's just weird?????
  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
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    Thanks everyone for your honest answers. I've decided this isn't worth ending our relationship over, it has nothing to do with how much he loves me but rather the fact that he has a lot of trouble sleeping with someone next to him and needs to be well-rested for work.

    I was thankful that last night he at least tried it, it showed that he does care about our relationship and making me happy. He wasn't able to sleep though so we ended up going into our separate beds again. I'm not going to press the issue any more but just accept it.
    i think you're making the right choice :-)
  • beckajw
    beckajw Posts: 1,738 Member
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    Thanks everyone for your honest answers. I've decided this isn't worth ending our relationship over, it has nothing to do with how much he loves me but rather the fact that he has a lot of trouble sleeping with someone next to him and needs to be well-rested for work.

    I was thankful that last night he at least tried it, it showed that he does care about our relationship and making me happy. He wasn't able to sleep though so we ended up going into our separate beds again. I'm not going to press the issue any more but just accept it.
    i think you're making the right choice :-)

    Me too!
  • Krissy366
    Krissy366 Posts: 458 Member
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    Thanks everyone for your honest answers. I've decided this isn't worth ending our relationship over, it has nothing to do with how much he loves me but rather the fact that he has a lot of trouble sleeping with someone next to him and needs to be well-rested for work.

    I was thankful that last night he at least tried it, it showed that he does care about our relationship and making me happy. He wasn't able to sleep though so we ended up going into our separate beds again. I'm not going to press the issue any more but just accept it.
    i think you're making the right choice :-)

    Me too!

    Me too. My biggest concern about your story was that the situation left you upset and not speaking to each other. Seems like you managed to discuss it if he gave it a try (and perhaps he'll try again in the future, maybe on a non-work night), but I hope you recognize that communication is the key to a healthy relationship. That's not to say that it's not ok to say you aren't ready to talk about something or need time to think about an issue, but shutting down and holding anger isn't good for anyone.
  • livinginwoods
    livinginwoods Posts: 562 Member
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    My husband and I have always had separate beds, in fact, separate bed rooms and we still get in plenty of nookie and cuddling. :blushing:
  • kimber0607
    kimber0607 Posts: 994 Member
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    My husband and I have always had separate beds, in fact, separate bed rooms and we still get in plenty of nookie and cuddling. :blushing:

    I think whatever floats your boat...as long as both people in the relationship are happy and satisfied...but it seems like the poster doesn't feel good about the current sleeping situation

    My ex snored like a mad man....it was horrible..but I sucked it up because it was more important to me to be close at night as a couple.... and I just liked the fact of sleeping in the same room and the same bed
  • EggTamOut
    EggTamOut Posts: 16
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    Oh boy. So hard not to make judgements here.......
    Just my personal take on it - get out now.
    I have often told my husband that the day he suggests separate beds is the day he moves out. I have a husband, not a room-mate. I am guessing you feel the same - you have a boyfriend, not a roomie.
    Are you "active" or is he possibly not being honest with you about his orientation? Just seems very un-couple-like behaviour to me. Just sayin'. Good luck to you.
  • TheBraveryLover
    TheBraveryLover Posts: 1,217 Member
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    I'm not much of a sleep cuddler but if my husband gets out of bed in the middle of the night I'm like

    hcpvR.gif

    :laugh:
  • TheBraveryLover
    TheBraveryLover Posts: 1,217 Member
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    I might as well reply. I have nights that I don't feel like cuddling with my SO (mainly in the summer lol) but I *always* want him in the bed with me. There have been times we've argued and he'll sit in the chair across the room while I'm trying to sleep, but I'll wake up a few minutes later and tell him to get in bed but "don't talk to me, a-hole!" LOL I don't care how much he makes me upset; if I'm in bed, he needs to be right there with me.

    Your situation would be a deal-breaker for me, but it's up to you as to how you want to deal with it.
  • Momjogger
    Momjogger Posts: 750 Member
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    Wow. I struck a cord with some people about my age comment. As a mom, I would not want my child in a relationship with someone older. If you think about it rationalIy, no parent would want that for their child. Why is that? It is just not a good idea for so many reasons. No offense to people who have an age difference in their relationship, but if she were my daughter, I would be worried.
  • Momjogger
    Momjogger Posts: 750 Member
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    Good luck no matter what you decide to do. Peace.
  • Tuffjourney
    Tuffjourney Posts: 971
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    :yawn:
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
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    Wow. I struck a cord with some people about my age comment. As a mom, I would not want my child in a relationship with someone older. If you think about it rationalIy, no parent would want that for their child. Why is that? It is just not a good idea for so many reasons. No offense to people who have an age difference in their relationship, but if she were my daughter, I would be worried.
    OP never indicated there was any age difference, so I think it was a really weird assumption to make. You kind of pulled it out of thin air, which makes me think you must have that on your mind for some reason.
  • JustJennie1
    JustJennie1 Posts: 3,843 Member
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    Wow. I struck a cord with some people about my age comment. As a mom, I would not want my child in a relationship with someone older. If you think about it rationalIy, no parent would want that for their child. Why is that? It is just not a good idea for so many reasons. No offense to people who have an age difference in their relationship, but if she were my daughter, I would be worried.

    Um ok. :huh:

    What are the reasons that make it "not a good idea"? Not only that but how can you, as a parent, tell your child who she can and can not fall in love with? Are you saying that if she fell in love with someone who was 5 years older than her who was kind, caring, treated her like a queen, had a good paying job, wanted to spend his life with her and have a family etc. that you'd be "worried" because he's older than her? You have no logical reason as to why someone should be "worried" that they're dating someone older than them. I can see if it's a twelve year old dating a twenty five year old but lets get real here: A twenty-something year old dating someone who is in their thirties or someone in their thirties dating someone in their forties is normal. You can not honestly expect people to just seek out someone their own age.

    Also, is it just a girl who is dating a man older that's "worrisome?" What about a man who dates an older woman? Is that ok?

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