Ladies: Best Way To Approach You In The Gym?
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I'm not a lady, but, here's my policy as a guy on approaching women at the gym:
Don't.
I'm there to work. You're there to work. IF a lady wants to break the ice, ask for advice (whether you need it or not) or a spot.0 -
"Excuse me but are you using that bench?"
Or if she's doing a particularly hard workout just comment on it. Ex: this cute girl was doing a killer ab workout and my husband in a non creepy way told her it was pretty serious.
Oh and if all else fails a small wave and a hi always works.
THIS! a smile and a wave.
yup!0 -
That is one thing I have no plans to ever do...every girl in the gym looks downright angry and ready to bite every guy's face off if we so much as glance their way.
Good observation. Adrenaline is pumping, we are nasty sweaty and pissed that somebody has been goofing around with the last set 15lb dumbbells for 20 minutes. Well that's me anyway.0 -
haha I love all the craziness that goes on in these posts ... but here's my "opinion"...
1) Check for a ring. I know some married women don't wear their rings to the gym or to work out because it can be annoying, but there are some that do and obviously if she's wearing a ring - don't say anything.
2) Just a smile and 'hey' to start off is good ... you don't have to come right out and ask her on a date first thing! I know there are some women on here saying they wouldn't like to be picked up at a gym, but I have some friends who I KNOW would like to have guys from their gym ask them out because they know they at least already have a similar interest in working out! Everyone is different.
3) This all depends on what kind of guy you are ... if you are trying to pick women up in a gym (and I'm not speaking to the OP, just in general!) just to hook up then that's obnoxious. IF you actually think you might have similar interests and there is something "special" about one woman/girl in general, I don't think there's anything wrong with attempt to get to know her! People meet each other and start relationships in stranger places than the gym.
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i am married, however when i was single i would have been thrilled to get chatted up at gym when i was all sweaty and pretty much feeling the least attractive i could ever feel! go for it!0
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Guess I am the weird girl in the room because I don't mind at all if a guy comes up to talk to me at the gym. I like when they come to the machine next to me and just strike up conversation. To me it shows they are fearless. Sure you could wait till I leave the gym but to me that's creepy and I think you were too wussy to talk to me earlier.
To prevent being rude just say "Hey, I don't mean to interrupt your workout, but I saw you from across the room and you caught my eye. You look like you are going strong in your workout, but I would love to hear from you." Slip me your number and tada! Not only have you energized my workout by making me feel all good on the inside, but I will call/text you haha.
Saying this would make it aceptable to approach me in the gym. Being casual and relaxed helps..0 -
I use a 30lb dumbell and take it to the side of their head, drag them out by the hair and into my car. Never had any trouble with that.
Or, "Hello." before the workout always works...just hello and a smile. If they got time and they like what they see, they'll make time for you.
Now I'm singing Lionel Richie...
~~ is it me your looking for~~ LMAO0 -
bump for later :drinker:0
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I forgot to add, women love guys that draw attention to themselves. Look at nature, it's always the bird with the most vibrant and colorful feathers which finds its mate. Buy spaghetti strap tops so your nipples hang out a bit and grunt very loud when doing all your lifts. That way they know you're top dog. Nothing sets off the pheremones like a sweaty meat head.
Result? The women approach you. Flawless strategy broski.
flawless plan there ^.
Just don't say " that's a nice wedding ring , do you wear it all the time ?:)" . Seriously. Don't. Really pissed me off. 0 -
a small wave and a hi always works.0
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Wow... get over yourself ladies!! I can't believe some of these answers. Just remember as soon as you hit mid 50's you're screwed and your body will start deforming into something hardly human....0
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Wear some Zubaz and they will flock to you.
ETA: just saw your update... it was the Zubaz, right? 0 -
Simple.
Don't.
Sorry.
^^ Agreed. Just Don't. ^^0 -
Women go to the gym to work out, and thats the last place they want to be hit on!! Not to mention, she will wonder if you are watching her all the time, making her more self aware of what shes doing, and it will make her uncomfortable.
^ that woman is only talking about herself, she isnt speaking for the rest of us I SWEARTAGAWD.
I feel like im on a mission here just hoping some nutter here goes to my gym and can take the good news back to everyone else that all those myths about not hitting on girls at the gym are untrue.
It's not sour, some of us don't need men flirting with us acting like tramps to validate ourselves. If the roles were reversed I'm sure there be more men feeling the same way. My guy friends hate chatty people at the gym just as much as I do.
Um excuse the bitter out of you.
I dont need men flirting with me to act like tramps. I need them to act like men.
No one said anything about being chatty or needing to be validated. All i said was that I consider the gym to be a building that has many people with similar goals and interests as I do and that, being a single woman, im open to one of them approaching me if he would like to talk to me. That im not going to rip his face off and feed it to him as though he doesnt have any feelings or a heart or maybe just had the best workout of his life and just wanted to share it with someone.
I cannot believe you just threw that in a stranger's face just because she said that you cannot speak for all women.
You're part of the problem, and intolerance and profiling and prejudice toward single females is an ugly, ugly problem. Esp if you are one, as well.0 -
I forgot to add, women love guys that draw attention to themselves. Look at nature, it's always the bird with the most vibrant and colorful feathers which finds its mate. Buy spaghetti strap tops so your nipples hang out a bit and grunt very loud when doing all your lifts. That way they know you're top dog. Nothing sets off the pheremones like a sweaty meat head.
Result? The women approach you. Flawless strategy broski.
Yeah...this is what really gets me going...0 -
The thread "Why aren't more guys ballsy" comes to mind. Hmmm, not sure why. :grumble:
Keep in mind that many people lead busy lives with demanding jobs. For a lot of people there are limited opportunities for social engagement outside of work and the gym. A public gym IS a social setting whether you like it or not. Many people look at it as a more wholesome place to find friends and possibly dates than a bar crawling with bimbos or knucklehead guys. A guy is a place where you can meet folks who are dedicated to a common interest (shocking reason to be attracted to someone, I know [sarcasm]. See this site [irony].)
Some of the extremists in this thread need to look into investing in a home gym or going to a small family owned one like the smart lady a few posts up. It might be worth it in order to avoid wasting so much energy and frustration putting on a b***hface front. Do everyone a favor and wear a shirt with "F-off" printed front and back then you can ditch the unsavory, miserable, uptight, frustrated demeanor.
I don't talk to people at the gym. not because I don't want to, but because I am shy. i do know that some guys are 'creepers' not because they're really creeps but because they're sick of the mixed signals and the results that can be contrary to the signals. they just adopt a ham fisted approach figuring something may come out of it, and if it doesn't... well at least not much time/effort was wasted trying to figure her out.
If anyone sees me at the gym... come talk to me. :glasses:
LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS^^^^^^^0 -
I'm married now, but if I was looking, I really don't think the gym is such a bad place to meet someone...there's plenty of ways to approach, but I'd suggest just starting with hello and a smile...or maybe compliment on how hard she works out, etc... I met my husband in a tire store waiting room and his 'opening line' was something about the music that was playing.
As long as its not coupled with a creepy leering once over gaze, or staring at her boobs, almost any comment can be a nice ice breaker (if she's not a total bi+tch).
In my opinion, its a hell of a lot better place to meet than a bar or something. I don't wear my ring when I work out, and if some nice guy comes along and chats with me, I usually just try to work in an innocent sounding 'husband" reference so I'm not sending out the wrong message. There's no need to get bent out of shape over it...0 -
For the record...OP no longer cares.
I defied you all and walked right up to the girl I was curious about...while she was all sweaty and in the middle of her workout...and you know what? She was pleasant and receptive...She even gave me her number, without me asking for it.
Lesson learned.
You are all free to continue bantering about how much you hate social interaction at the gym, in fear that it may disrupt your precious workout.
I'm glad it worked for you. I would say just start a casual conversation if she's not in the middle of her work out, say at the water fountain. And keep it pretty brief, so both of you can get back to work. Try again next time, and if she seems flippant, then stop.0 -
So this is a question I've long since wondered about. From time to time you cross a pretty girl in the gym and you assume she has similar interests and are curious to learn more about her...So how do you initiate a conversation without sending the wrong message/signals?
Pretend this is a person who you've made continual eye contact a few-several times with. They appear friendly...but you both constantly have your music in and move with purpose...presumably because you've both just gotten out of work and want to finish up your duties as soon as possible. He comes up to you and leads off with....?
Hey, whats up?
Come here often?
Nice Nike's?
I don't think so...What would the ideal guy say?
either don't.... or maybe in the sauna... i go there after every workout and that's pretty much the only time i would appreciate being talked to.... or maybe after the gym if it doesn't seem like she is RUNNING to leave....but that heads into stalker territory and could make her uncomfortable.0 -
The best thing to do is ask them for a lock of hair to out your secret box! Girls love that!0
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"Just smile and wave boys, smile and wave."0
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That is one thing I have no plans to ever do...every girl in the gym looks downright angry and ready to bite every guy's face off if we so much as glance their way.
Yep that's me at the gym. 0 -
im guessing that asking them out in the womans locker room is FROWNED UPON!?!??!?!?!?0
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This response made me laugh out loud, so I had to share it with one of my friends at work, and she cracked up too and said she wants to marry you, lol.
Personally, I would be flattered if a guy approached me at the gym, especially since I'm not looking my best when I work out. I've had guys smile and/or give me the eye, but never actually approach me. I'm not so intense about my workouts that I can't have a brief conversation. Maybe just start with "hi" and see how she responds.
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Or "I heard you fart during your benchpress. That's some really good intensity."
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With caution!0
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"Would you like me to spot you?" Works every time! :blushing:0
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When a girl is trying to do squats or pull ups, just give her a spot. She won't ask for one because of pride, so just walk up behind her and put your hands on her *kitten* (you could go hips, but *kitten* is more intimate, it tells her you're interested in more than friendship, a major turn on). Provide support as needed, she'll be extremely grateful when she's finished her set, you'll be in for sure.
ok I just wanna ask is the guy hot that is grabbing or not? that make a difference.
geez, ladies, go easy....poor guys, its just a joke
God I hope you're joking. I really hope you're joking. Because any random dude that grabs my *kitten* saying he's trying to "spot" me at the gym would get a swift backhand to the face. No joke.
Try to do that with 135 lb on your back, wouldn't want you to drop that now. :bigsmile:
That would absolutely be the last rep I did, and once my barbell was racked, then the backhand (or kick to the balls) would come. Better? I'm a pretty chill person, but somebody I don't know grabbing my *kitten* would NOT fly.
I don't see how a kick to the balls is better, that's not going to make you any friends.
Haha I don't make friends with *kitten* grabbin' creepers!0 -
Don't. I am there to work my butt off and to get healthy. The Gym is not a pick up place.0
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Say hi every now and then - convo will strike up if she's interested. Especially if you've made eye contact a few times, you don't need to go in for the full swoop right off the bat, just say hi and carry on. Leave a liiiiiiiiittle mystery 0
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Best way? Don't make eye contact and keep walking.0
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