Men, would you let your wife be a surrogate mother?
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I saw the title in the forums and KNEW it was you.0
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Tricked us by changing the photo!Men, would you let your wife be a surrogate mother? Ladies, if you really wanted to be a surrogate mother for someone and your husband wouldn't let you, would you do it anyways? I am asking because I have a friend who is going through this and some of you usually gives great advice.
Wait...I know you.....didn't you start the masculinity epidemic thread hating on assertive women?
You are correct. Hmmm . . .0 -
One of my best friends couldn't conceive again because of scarring, and I offered to carry her baby, but my husband (at the time) said he didn't want me to. I actually enjoyed being pregnant, but I wouldn't go behind his back and do it anyway.0
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hellz yeah, have you seen the money that can be made.
plus you get to make a couple happy.0 -
The question is flawed. No one has that much control over anyone else. I would not approve of it, if I were married, but I really have no say at the end of the day. If she decided to do that, it would probably be without me. Having said that, I realize that there are circumstances where we might both together decide to do it,. like for a dear friend, or in a situation that was very warm and special. But, it would have to be really frikin' special.0
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I would LOVE to do this in the future... I mentioned it to my boyfriend once, he didn't seem comfortable with the idea so we will have to just wait and see. If he really didn't want me to do it then no I wouldn't. Having someone else's child is a big deal so I would never do it without his permission.0
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I don't understand why the couple wanting a child couldn't adopt. There are plenty of children and babies already born that need homes.0
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I would certainly be willing to be a surrogate mother. I struggled with fertility myself and understand the pain that is involved.0
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Totally situational and, yes, I would expect my wife to discuss it with me, not for consent but definitely for input.0
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Um, let? It's my body, I'd do it if I wanted to. I wouldn't do it behind his back. I would tell him I'm doing it and that's that. I have thought about it for a friend of mine, she and her husband were trying to have a baby for a few years and had no luck, just when I said I would do it for her, they found out they were pregnant. It should be talked over between the wife and husband, I don't think it's his decision at all.0
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i think its all about the approch, if she had this idea, and her husband said HELL NO, guess what, she is gonna do it anyway, its all in the approch!0
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I was a surrogate, but my husband at the time was supportive. It was not MY child, I had IVF I was simply an "oven"
This is how I would do it, it couldnt be "my" child.
I had a really easy pregnancy and a great child birthing body haha
I would consider it a honor.0 -
I don't understand why the couple wanting a child couldn't adopt. There are plenty of children and babies already born that need homes.
I understand your point- but sometimes couples really want a child that is their own- and with surrogacy- the child can be.0 -
I offered to be one for my sister in law, she has trouble carrying to term. They looked into adoption and it is VERY expensive and they couldn't afford it. For a random person I don't think I could do it.0
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My husband and I would have a rational conversation about it and come to a compromise if there were one needed, but bottom line is my husband respects the decisions I make for myself and my body. So there's no "letting" involved there.0
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Definitely a decision husbands and wives should make together0
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Not only would I not agree to it (i dont go for "letting anyone do anything" im not her parent) but on another point I think surrogacy is bad.
Why do you this it's bad??
Again making no judgments on what anyone does...im a libertarian....
but..to me Surrogacy and In Vitiro seem to go against natural law and are selfish. I knwo this is easy for me to say, as someone who had three kids no problem (strong like bull lol)...but if we couldnt have kids...id look at the fact that there are thousands and millions of kids without parents and that our lot in life was to provide a home for them
Just my opinion...ill let the flaming begin.0 -
for a close friend, I would absolutely do it, and I believe my husband would be supportive. I would never do something without his support; however, I wouldn't have married him had we not been on the same page with most things.0
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I would absolutely be a surrogate mother for someone. I've never been pregnant before, but if a couple I knew really well asked me I would do it. In fact, with as many gay friends as I have, I'll probably wind up being a surrogate one day. I don't think I could do it for a random stranger, though. And if my fiance wasn't comfortable with me doing it, hell no I wouldn't do it.0
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Not only would I not agree to it (i dont go for "letting anyone do anything" im not her parent) but on another point I think surrogacy is bad.
Why do you this it's bad??
Again making no judgments on what anyone does...im a libertarian....
but..to me Surrogacy and In Vitiro seem to go against natural law and are selfish. I knwo this is easy for me to say, as someone who had three kids no problem (strong like bull lol)...but if we couldnt have kids...id look at the fact that there are thousands and millions of kids without parents and that our lot in life was to provide a home for them
Just my opinion...ill let the flaming begin.
I don't see what this has to do with being Libertarian. I see you using that often and as a Libertarian, I'm offended that you throw the term around like you do. Being a surrogate is selfish and against Libertarian thinking? Huh?0 -
Me and my husband have talked about it. This fool wanted me to sell my "eggs" and I said pfft I rather be a sarrogate. His responce to that was as a previous one here "Hell no I can barely put up with you when you carried ours!" LOL!!
But to make it clear although I would love to make a couple very happy if he didnt like the idea I wouldnt do it. However if my brother came to me no question about it im there.0 -
I hated being pregnant with my own kid...let alone someone elses.
^^100% this. The reason we stopped at 2 was because we agreed we couldn't handle a 3rd pregnancy...not a 3rd kid!0 -
Hell no. Carry someone else's child? No thank you. The ruination of her vagina is the sole responsibility of any sprogs I impregnate her with.
In all seriousness, I think someone unable to give birth should adopt so I disagree with surrogacy on principle. Becoming pregnant with someone else's child, IMO, is grounds for divorce. Saying "it's my body!" is just crap as the man will have to deal with you being pregnant for the 9 months.0 -
I would never be a surrogate to another couple because I believe that conceiving your own child with so many homeless children in the world is a little selfish.
That being said, no man "lets me" do anything with my body - I am an adult, and I make my own decisions regarding what happens in my uterus.0 -
"Let" me? It's my body not his. I would talk to him about and would try my best to see where he is coming from. There would only be certain people that I would be able to do it for (family and very very very close friends are on the list).0
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Loaded question....
I'm a proponent of surrogacy in the right circumstances. I don't find fault in those couples (or single women) who desire to have their own children but for some reason, haven't been able to get pregnant. I don't know if I would be a surrogate for someone else's baby, but then it truly depends on who is asking. If it's a close friend or a family member that can't conceive and they really want a child of their own, I would consider it. But then again, that is something my husband and I would have to agree upon as a couple. If he's not okay with it, then we're not doing it. I see the virtue in adopting those children out there that are in desperate need for a loving home, but I can also understand how torn parents must feel when they cannot have any of their own. It's a tough and very, very personal choice to ask someone to be a surrogate (and for the surrogate to consent) as well as adopting.
In other words, I really don't think there is a definitive right or wrong answer when it comes to this. It's completely subjective.0 -
How much does it pay $$$ ?? We all have a price0
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...'let'?
Eeeeeeesh.0 -
I love being pregnant (most of the time, I have easy pregnancies) and would love to do it for someone else... provided they paid all the bills. I would hope my husband would understand "My body. My choice."0
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Not only would I not agree to it (i dont go for "letting anyone do anything" im not her parent) but on another point I think surrogacy is bad.
Why is surrogacy bad? I want to keep an open mind on this. I'm a woman who can't carry kids and having a surrogate mom is one of the options that was considered. It was only overturned for now because of the expense and fear that someone would take off with my kid.
I have had a friend offer that when/if we decide we're ready, she would carry. Adoption is another thought, too. I have a daughter, almost 18-years-old now, but men often want the chance to have their own child and I can understand that entirely.but..to me Surrogacy and In Vitiro seem to go against natural law and are selfish
Went back and saw the response, so now I know. I don't see a medical miracle of this as against natural law. Some of us have diseases that prevent us from being able to carry. You also don't know how devastating it is to be abandoned, left for someone else because she CAN carry a child and you can't and the man wants so badly to have his own kid. I would totally opt for adoption first, but will go whatever route also allows my guy to feel happy too.0
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