Diet and Exercise vs. Surgery. Thoughts?

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Replies

  • angelcurry130
    angelcurry130 Posts: 265 Member
    Surgery is a cop-out.

    Why do I think so? Because I was considering it AS a cop-out. I didn't want to feel disappointed in myself for my poor eating habits. I didn't want to get disgusted looks from people when they met me and saw how large I was. I hated my self image and wanted a quick, easy fix. I was a slave to the food and I couldn't admit that to myself. Fortunately, I didn't have a pile of cash big enough to even bother with a consultation. So I waited.

    I waited just long enough to have a heart episode. Amazingly enough, with my eating habits, it was not due to diabetes, high cholestorol, high bp, or even heart disease. Just a blood clot. But, it was enough to get me going. I cut all the garbage I was eating. No starches, no sugar, limited carbs. That alone dropped SIXTY POUNDS!!! With portion control and exercise, I intend to lose at least 100 more. I will NEVER go back to where I was.

    I made a choice as an adult to fix my lifestyle. No one was shoving food down my throat. I had to fix my thinking, and change my bad habits. Anyone who makes excuses has no right to claim success. They just have temporary results. You have to want it, and let go of the comfort zone, because the comfort zone will kill you.
  • AmyP619
    AmyP619 Posts: 1,137 Member
    I'm a nurse and I have seen the good things and bad things that go along with bariatric surgery.

    I know that I am going to get lambasted for my comment, but here goes: People who need bariatric surgery are people who have weak minds and constitutions.

    Yep, I just said that and I will hold to it.

    Why do I say this?

    I say this because every person that I know who has had bariatric surgery has learned nothing about eating healthy. They continue on with their old, junk food eating habits and then wonder why they are lacking in vitamins and mineral, why their hair is falling out, why they lack energy, etc. They also wonder why their stomach stretched back out and why they are gaining weight again.

    Usually, before a person has bariatric surgery, they must go on a diet to show that they are capable of following the strict diet that people who get the surgery have to follow.

    Say what??? They have to go on a diet!!!!

    If they can maintain a diet before surgery, than why can't they lose the weight without the surgery.

    Because they lack motivation. Bariatric surgery appeals to people who want the quick solution to a complicated problem. Just as people want the pill to control their blood pressure or diabetes instead of losing weight, some people want bariatric surgery to help them lose weight quickly instead of taking the long route where they really would learn how to eat healthy.

    The motivation to follow a diet prior to bariatric surgery is the bariatric surgery itself. If only these same people would find a different motivation to get themselves to follow a diet, they would lose the weight without the surgery.

    Are these people happy with their decision to have bariatric surgery? I would say that half of the people that I know that have had it (I know about 20) wish they never had it. They can't eat anything with sugar without experiencing dumping syndrome. Two of them have to wear wigs because they are losing hair in patches. One can't eat more than half a cup of food or she gets nauseous. Half of them have to be near a bathroom for an hour after eating.

    Oh what fun that sounds like!

    Then we have a MFP friend who I unfriended who was losing 5-6 pounds a week by eating only 500-700 calories a day post bariatric surgery. You want to eat like that, fine. Just don't friend me.

    Do they have bragging rights?

    I don't feel that they do. They didn't really work hard to lose the weight. Yeah, maybe they exercised a bit, but they certainly are limited in the number of calories they can eat because the stomach is smaller. Additionally, they don't learn to listen to their body or eat healthy, unless they really go out of their way to do so. Some just continue eating their crappy food, like Fritos or potato chips, just in smaller portions.

    So, no, I don't think that they should have bragging rights. If I had a person who had bariatric surgery and lost 100 pounds and another person who lost 100 pounds the old fashion way standing in front of me, I would respect the later more than the former because they worked hard in order to lose that weight. The person who had bariatric surgery took the easy route.

    Basically, you gained the weight shoveling food in your mouth and sitting on your butt all day. Do the opposite and you will lose weight.

    And don't give me that "I have a disease that causes me to eat" story. There are only two diseases that cause people to eat - Bardet-Biedl syndrome and Prader-Willi syndrome. Look them up. They are very uncommon, so you better have proof to show me that you have either of those two if you are going to say you have a disease that causes you to eat. Unless you have either of those two diseases, the only disease that you have is what I call hand-to-mouth syndrome.

    Love this. Thank you for posting! I agree 100%!!!!!!!! That's exactly what I said about people dieting and losing weight before the surgery in order to have it.... If you can lost 30 lbs in 3 months before your surgery in order to have it... YOU CAN LOSE 100 ON YOUR OWN, TOO! You're just too lazy!!!!! I don't know HOW many times I have given up at dieting because it's so hard. Yes, it's HARD, but if you stick to it and really set your mind to it..you can do it! Surgery is permanent, it's dangerous, and it's no fun when you're constantly sick. Suck it up, change your eating habits, exercise, and the weight WILL come off.
    AMEN!
  • seximami79
    seximami79 Posts: 156 Member
    surgery freaks me out, and I feel that you should not invite unnecessary invasiveness that could go wrong when you have other options...
  • Who's lauding anyone? Defensive much? the question was whether these individuals have bragging rights. Just because some of u think they don't is by no means the same as "lauding" them.
  • dpeeler28
    dpeeler28 Posts: 6 Member
    i'm one of them cheaters that had surgery and ya, i could eat junk food, drink pop, stuff myself til i puke ya know, the same things a person without surgery can do.....but i don't and i'm using this as a tool to teach myself to eat healthier and make better choices. there is no shame in needing help. my tool made my stomach smaller...because i had a problem with portion control. this is simply a tool to stop me from excessively stuffing myself, it will not MAKE me choose healthier foods, or cook my meals for me, or run 2 miles for me nor will it magically burn calories for me....all that is what I HAVE TO CHOOSE TO DO just like ANYONE ELSE TRYING TO LOSE WEIGHT. so if someone has a problem with consuming too much soda in a day and it has caused weight gain, should i condemn them for switching to diet soda? i mean, diet soda is a tool to help you lose weight, i mean, to keep you from over-consuming calories, right?? you couldn't stop drinking pop so you switched to an altered form of of pop that wouldn't kill your(millionth)weight loss attempt....... i had a hard time with portion so i switched to an alternate form of stomach so that i could be successful at my "millionth' and last weight loss attempt....anything that you change in your diet to keep you from your pit falls is a tool, just like surgery is a tool. it will not work for those people who are not willing to make the appropriate life changes just like exercise too will fail when not used appropriately....that would be like me walking up to someone who eats a meal replacement bar and saying you're a failure because you can't do it on your own. or saying the same thing to someone who eats sugar free food, because they have a hard time with sugar........no matter how big or small, it all comes down to the same thing. You use what tool you know will help you succeed....plain and simple.
    as far as all of the stories about "so n so gained it all back ofter surgery", one person ruins it for everyone....there are those of us that researched, and contemplated and prayed and cried and felt like a failure(without any of you having to tell us over and over) trying to decide what we needed to be healthy, happy, and successful.....i personally will be DAMNED if any person makes this choice(for anyone)out to be an ugly, cheating, way out.......for all of you who want to condemn, so be it...an ugly heart makes an ugly person and inner beauty and peace go much farther than your vanity and "willpower".
  • RhonndaJ
    RhonndaJ Posts: 1,615 Member
    Some of the responses on here make me sad. Particularly in that some of them come from medical professionals.

    I would hazard to say that every person who is morbidly obese suffers from at least one mental disorder that contributes to how they got to where they are. It doesn't matter if it's a chemical malfunction or trauma created, such disorders warrant other peoples' compassion, not their critical judgment.

    I spent long years believing I should be able to 'fix' myself, that I was weak-willed and just didn't try hard enough to be more 'normal'. I'm not talking about being morbidly obese, I'm talking about the depression, the anxiety, the chaotic mood swings, all of which were contributing factors to my out of control eating for comfort when I actually was living a darned good life.

    I spent more than 25 years trying to find a solution. Both to my mental health issues and to my weight. I have done time in therapy. And I've taken too many combinations of pills. And I've done too many efforts to lose weight, healthy ones as well as unhealthy. This isn't the sign of a weak willed person. It's the sign of a strong person, a heck of a strong person, going on year after year after year in a state they would wish on not even their worst enemies, and never giving up for long. Always trying again to find something that will work.

    I attribute a lot of my success right now to finally finding a combination of meds that keeps me balanced because if my depression and anxiety and mood swings weren't under control I don't believe I could do what I'm doing now. And that is finally finding consistency in making better food choices, and in being able to exercise more than I'm not.

    Does that mean that I'm not entitled to be proud of all my hard work because I needed the crutch of medication to start eating better and working out, and that I'm likely going to need that crutch for the rest of my life so I can be happy and fully enjoy my life?

    ~snorts in disgust~

    Tough.

    Surgery is a necessary tool for some. It's the key they need to unlock the door to a better life. Same as my meds were the key for me. Yeah, a lot of people misuse the tool, heck a lot of people misuse meds, but across the board condemnation of everyone who has the surgery who isn't bed-bound is unfair.
  • Onaughmae
    Onaughmae Posts: 873 Member
    For some people it is a life saving option. It was for me. My diabetes was so far out of control that it was killing me. Within 2 days of my surgery my blood sugar became more manageable. I went from using 200 units of insulin a day to a now healthy 30-35 units a day and I am perfectly controlled. Dont assume that because someone has WLS that they are lazy and looking for an easy fix. It isnt easy...quite far from it. I have to watch my diet very closely...and I will have to do that for the rest of my life. I have to exercise just like everyone else. Fat does not just fall off my *kitten* while I sit on the sofa and eat Cheetos.

    And for the nurse that thinks I have a weak mind and constitution...shame on you. You should know better. I am a nurse too. I actually did my research on the benefits of RNY surgery for diabetics. Maybe before you run your mouth off you might try a little research on your own also. I sincerely hope you are not so judgemental to your patients...if you are then I honestly feel sorry for them. Surely you dont think that I am taking the easy way out for using insulin to replace what my pancreas does not produce? How about for the heart patient that has bypass to save their lives? They shouldnt have had those blocked arteries in the first place...how dare them....While we are at it, those people that have had limbs amputated should just suck it up and hop around instead of taking the easy way and having a prosthetic...I mean really...whats the world coming to?
  • CarlaYvonne
    CarlaYvonne Posts: 38 Member
    WLS isn't a cop out. I personally have had WLS done and I still have to bust my butt to see results. It is another tool in my weight lose journey. I still have to exercise and watch what I eat. As a person who was literaly addicted to food, the LapBand saved my life I truley beielve.
    I do know people who have had WLS done and they have lost nothing, or lost and gained it all back. It is not a quick fix, you can't be lazy. It's a weight loss aid, not the complete answer. Dedication, self disapline and will power are still required to get the job done and requires the correct mind set.
    I don't think I went the easy way out, because it has not been an easy journey post LapBand. I commend weight loss in all forms, as long as it is done in a healthy manner and the person is not starving them selves or making them selves get sick.
  • KendaVSG
    KendaVSG Posts: 147
    Essentially, the general consensus on this post is that I don't deserve to be proud of, nor should I be posting about my weight loss. Because I didn't do it myself. I cheated. I took the easy, lazy way out by having bariatric surgery. Since (as it has been proven by so many commenters' "close personal friends" and family members) I will gain all of it back, I therefore deserve no kudos, nor well wishes.

    Okay. Well thank you so very much for making that clear for me. I thought that my two hours of working out, 6 days a week, monitoring my calories and utilizing this tool (both my sleeve, AND MFP) were what was making me successful with losing the 75% of the 350 pounds I started out with needing to lose! I am so glad you were all here to let me know how wrong I was.

    So, for all of you who have positively commented and complimented me on my weight loss, I apologize for taking those remarks away from people on here who have lost their weight the honest way, with absolutely no help nor weight loss tools, as they are the only ones who's weight loss was truly worked for and earned, and have absolutely no possibility of gaining any of it back. Again, my sincerest apologies for taking away from those worthy "losers".


    You judgmental, uneducated, ignorant, donkey's arses!
  • Some of the responses on here make me sad. Particularly in that some of them come from medical professionals.

    I would hazard to say that every person who is morbidly obese suffers from at least one mental disorder that contributes to how they got to where they are. It doesn't matter if it's a chemical malfunction or trauma created, such disorders warrant other peoples' compassion, not their critical judgment.

    I spent long years believing I should be able to 'fix' myself, that I was weak-willed and just didn't try hard enough to be more 'normal'. I'm not talking about being morbidly obese, I'm talking about the depression, the anxiety, the chaotic mood swings, all of which were contributing factors to my out of control eating for comfort when I actually was living a darned good life.

    I spent more than 25 years trying to find a solution. Both to my mental health issues and to my weight. I have done time in therapy. And I've taken too many combinations of pills. And I've done too many efforts to lose weight, healthy ones as well as unhealthy. This isn't the sign of a weak willed person. It's the sign of a strong person, a heck of a strong person, going on year after year after year in a state they would wish on not even their worst enemies, and never giving up for long. Always trying again to find something that will work.

    I attribute a lot of my success right now to finally finding a combination of meds that keeps me balanced because if my depression and anxiety and mood swings weren't under control I don't believe I could do what I'm doing now. And that is finally finding consistency in making better food choices, and in being able to exercise more than I'm not.

    Does that mean that I'm not entitled to be proud of all my hard work because I needed the crutch of medication to start eating better and working out, and that I'm likely going to need that crutch for the rest of my life so I can be happy and fully enjoy my life?

    ~snorts in disgust~

    Tough.

    Surgery is a necessary tool for some. It's the key they need to unlock the door to a better life. Same as my meds were the key for me. Yeah, a lot of people misuse the tool, heck a lot of people misuse meds, but across the board condemnation of everyone who has the surgery who isn't bed-bound is unfair.
  • Good Topic. I was a candidate for weight loss surgery last March (2012). However, I was required to take a class which discussed all of the pros and cons of the surgery (gastric sleeve) and had to lose 10 percent of my weight before the doctor would consider the surgery.

    I did really well on the weight loss during the 12 week class, and the more I learned about the before and after of the surgery, I knew it was not for me. I am 67 years old and had 138 lbs to lose. Yes, it would have been faster, but I was chicken, quite frankly, to have such a drastic type of surgery with long lasting and far reaching ramifications. Hanging skin, plus a teeny stomach pouch after so you would still have to stay on a diet all the rest of your life. My doctor said, "LeeAnn, we can get you there in 18 months. You won't have anything to adjust to and you will by that time be able to maintain this for the rest of your life NO PROBLEM!" So far, so fair. I have lost 51 lbs as of this morning. My life has completely changed - the way I think, feel and act. I have a long way to go, and I am optimistic! I know I can do it!

    PS. Some people have life threatening problems such as diabetes, high blood pressure, kidney or liver disease, and heart problems. For these individuals, the surgery may save their lives, and and it's do or die. I was not in that situation, but was frustrated by repeated loss and gains over my adult life. I just had to get committed, and be serious about it for the first time, ever, REALLY. Plus having a supportive doctor, and the time to shop, plan, cook and exercise. It's all good.!!!

    :bigsmile: E mail me if you have any specific questions: leeannbos@gmail.com

    All the best, LeeAnn
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
    Obviously, weight loss without surgery is preferable and probably healthier --- surgery carries its own risks -- but if someone has tried and failed numerous times I guess it's better than nothing. What would scare me is being able to eat so little for the rest of one's life. It's one thing if you voluntarily restrict your calories, but having no choice would freak me out.
  • AmyP619
    AmyP619 Posts: 1,137 Member
    Essentially, the general consensus on this post is that I don't deserve to be proud of, nor should I be posting about my weight loss. Because I didn't do it myself. I cheated. I took the easy, lazy way out by having bariatric surgery. Since (as it has been proven by so many commenters' "close personal friends" and family members) I will gain all of it back, I therefore deserve no kudos, nor well wishes.

    Okay. Well thank you so very much for making that clear for me. I thought that my two hours of working out, 6 days a week, monitoring my calories and utilizing this tool (both my sleeve, AND MFP) were what was making me successful with losing the nearly 350 pounds I started out with needing to lose! I am so glad you were all here to let me know how wrong I was.

    So, for all of you who have positively commented and complimented me on my weight loss, I apologize for taking those remarks away from people on here who have lost their weight the honest way, with absolutely no help nor weight loss tools, as they are the only ones who's weight loss was truly worked for and earned, and have absolutely no possibility of gaining any of it back. Again, my sincerest apologies for taking away from those worthy "losers".


    You judgmental, uneducated, ignorant, donkey's arses!

    Some people are rude, ignorant donkey's arses... but I think the consensus on surgery the "easy" way out comes from the standpoint that there are many people who have this surgery and learn nothing from it. They don't eat better, they don't exercise, they just lose the weight eating nothing but junk because their stomach is tiny, and they do the surgery because it's easier than spending a year or two trying to do it the "hard way". I definitely commend you for putting in the time, sweat, and effort...for using those 6 days a week to exercise.. for watching your calories.. for doing it the RIGHT way. Those choices, whether you've had surgery or not, are very difficult choices. It's just as difficult for someone who has had surgery to exercise as it is for someone who hasn't. Watching what we eat and exercising regularly are obstacles a lot of people struggle with. I find your weight loss journey to be commendable, and it's great that you did it the right way. I was one of the people who did not support the surgery if it was going to be the "lazy and easy" way out... there are people who have it, learn nothing, lose weight, then put it all back on and end up where they started... THOSE are the people I think many of the "anti-surgery" people are talking about.
    For those who ARE anti-surgery ALL the way around, whether people worked their *kitten* off or not, deserve your retort. It's sad, it's ignorant, but unfortunately people are always going to judge others in that way.
    Either way, no matter how people are doing it, MFP should be a support system, and I hate that threads often become a place to attack and judge others. It's hypocritical of what this site is about.
  • I wanted to reply to the post I quoted..Agree 100 %. Thank you for sharing your story. I praise you for all your efforts! Congrats! Makes me sad with all of these comments. We just need to respect others for their decision. No judging of others. No disrespecting of their choice to help themselves. If we fail, we fail. Hell, we ALL have failed at something. It's not the end of the world. My 10 year old daughter was just sitting next to me and wanted to read..I said NO!! I can't have her read all these comments. She would ask why are people being to mean and negative ( I do believe in freedom of speech). It's just that after reading these posts, I wonder why our world is the way it is today.
  • captnemo44
    captnemo44 Posts: 82 Member
    I know a few that had the weight loss surgery done, and everyone has gained back there weight plus more. Also they still have the bad eating habits.
  • Just for those that keep repeating that "my friends had the surgery and have gained all the weight back" I hate to tell you but so do a lot of "natural" dieters gain all the weight back. I say if it gets you to where you need to be, go for it. I think the benefits from carrying around less weight out weigh the so called "cop out" factor.
    By the way I'm doing it naturally, if I could have afforded it, I'd have done it. I do half marathons and am a very active person, but I can tell you that it would be much easier to be active if I didn't weight this much!
    Cut people some slack, you don't know what they've gone through or what their battle is like. Support people, and if you see someone slipping back, don't rag on them, ask them to go for a walk, it will do you both some good!

    Best comment on here! I know MANY people who have had the surgery and most have been very successful. It's a hard road to travel no matter which path you choose. A little less judgement and a lot more support would make it a much more pleasant place!
  • MrsBully4
    MrsBully4 Posts: 304 Member
    I was never interested in weight loss surgery because I like food, I like having my stomach intact, had no health problems aside from being fat, and was not afraid of dropping dead.

    Now, if I had some kind of medical crisis or weighed much, much more than 273 lbs to start with, I may have had a different opinion.
  • dpeeler28
    dpeeler28 Posts: 6 Member
    Obviously, weight loss without surgery is preferable and probably healthier --- surgery carries its own risks -- but if someone has tried and failed numerous times I guess it's better than nothing. What would scare me is being able to eat so little for the rest of one's life. It's one thing if you voluntarily restrict your calories, but having no choice would freak me out.

    i would just like to explain something -hopefully you dont mind- for the first six months after the gastric sleeve you do eat very small portions, but usually after a year or two you can consume a normal amount of calories...you HAVE to teach yourself during that first 6 months or so how to make those calories count though. this is where people usually start getting off trck and sliding in to old habits. people assume you will always eat these teeny tiny portions, and that's not exactly accurate. you do eat smaller portions but eventually your are eating "normally" but, you HAVE to stop when you are full.....it's a big mind game in all honesty. eventually you get used to eating the correct portions(believe me, i freaked the first 2 weeks and hated myself for the decision to have the surgery) and you will eat between 4-6 small meals/snacks a day----like a normal person would/should. and this actually keeps your metabolism fed too....
  • abberbabber
    abberbabber Posts: 972 Member
    Just for those that keep repeating that "my friends had the surgery and have gained all the weight back" I hate to tell you but so do a lot of "natural" dieters gain all the weight back. I say if it gets you to where you need to be, go for it. I think the benefits from carrying around less weight out weigh the so called "cop out" factor.
    By the way I'm doing it naturally, if I could have afforded it, I'd have done it. I do half marathons and am a very active person, but I can tell you that it would be much easier to be active if I didn't weight this much!
    Cut people some slack, you don't know what they've gone through or what their battle is like. Support people, and if you see someone slipping back, don't rag on them, ask them to go for a walk, it will do you both some good!

    Best comment on here! I know MANY people who have had the surgery and most have been very successful. It's a hard road to travel no matter which path you choose. A little less judgement and a lot more support would make it a much more pleasant place!

    No no, I'm sorry, you're wrong. Nobody is successful long term with WLS, it's just not how it works. Haven't you learned anything in this thread?!

    :wink:
  • Nettabee
    Nettabee Posts: 296 Member
    This reminds Me of the TLC show about those four people who had gastric bypass. I think it was "My 600lb life" or something. That show PISSED ME THE F*** OFF! Nothing but excuse after excuse, surgery after surgery. And then after 7 years only one guy kept all his weight off and lost more. You have nothing to brag about. You took the easy way out!

    Half my family has medical issues. Diabetes, hypertension, etc. The ones who are over weight (including myself but luckily I have no medical issues) started out well over 350lbs. At some point you have to put the spoon down, get off your fat butt and make a CHANGE! One by one everyone is making that lifestyle change. NOT with surgery, but working on themselves inside and out.

    You don't get bragging rights because you took shortcuts. Yeah good for you you've lost weight. But you also had over half your stomach stapled off. Meanwhile others are learning self control, making mistakes and falling down, but brushing themselves off and getting right back on the horse!

    Vent completed. :flowerforyou:
  • 0somuchbetter0
    0somuchbetter0 Posts: 1,335 Member
    I'm not reading this whole thread because it just upsets me. We had a similar discussion a few weeks ago: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/667363-just-curious-how-do-you-guys-feel-about-gastric-bypass
  • CharlieBarleyMom
    CharlieBarleyMom Posts: 727 Member
    I know from having gone for a consultation (3+ years ago) that there is more to the surgery than just surgery - there is 6 months worth of preparatory psychologist's appointments and nutritionists appointments and you are also supposed to try to lose weight on your own during those 6 months.

    I also know from having been to the consultation that those things are mandatory but overlooked if you don't lose any weight and the psycologist is just for the record ...

    It does take determination to not eat like you used to once your stomach is cut in half and your digestive system is all messed up... but I know people who have done it... and yup, they're back at their starting weight...

    I knew for me, that if I could eat a VLCD like I'd be forced to after surgery then I would lose it on my own... but since I knew I had underlying causes for having gained the weight I knew I had to attack those before I could help myself. Enter MFP.

    Now I'm not fully through my program, I'm never going to be fully through my program. Nor have I conquered all of my little devils that brought me to this spot in the first place... but I am working on them and even though I haven't lost anything in 6-8 months now, I'm still determined and on the path to health. And I'm eating healthy. Getting healthy, staying healthy, looking younger, feeling better.

    Good luck to anyone who undertakes losing weight, but I still feel that the surgery is someone trying to bypass the hard work... and guess what, you don't get to bypass it. It is still work and you've still got to eat right and exercise to keep it off.
  • RainHoward
    RainHoward Posts: 1,599 Member
    Wow, I am now completely disgusted with the human race and a number of people on MFP. For a place that is supposed to be about supporting one another, all these posts filled with hate are sad. Many of you should simply be ashamed of yourselves and attitudes. Bigoted, hateful and rude. Not to mention uneducated about the very thing you are going off on.

    That being said, I really don't care what anyone else thinks. I'm not doing this for you, or you or that guy over there. I care as much about your opinion of my choice to receive surgery as I do about what you think of my clothes or my car. That is to say, not one iota. I'm not doing this for anyone other than myself. For my health, for my happiness and to better my life. If you don't like that or the methods I use, I don't care.

    Now I am off to weep at the state of humanity. Sometimes my own race embarrasses me.
  • Onaughmae
    Onaughmae Posts: 873 Member
    Wow, I am now completely disgusted with the human race and a number of people on MFP. For a place that is supposed to be about supporting one another, all these posts filled with hate are sad. Many of you should simply be ashamed of yourselves and attitudes. Bigoted, hateful and rude. Not to mention uneducated about the very thing you are going off on.

    That being said, I really don't care what anyone else thinks. I'm not doing this for you, or you or that guy over there. I care as much about your opinion of my choice to receive surgery as I do about what you think of my clothes or my car. That is to say, not one iota. I'm not doing this for anyone other than myself. For my health, for my happiness and to better my life. If you don't like that or the methods I use, I don't care.

    Now I am off to weep at the state of humanity. Sometimes my own race embarrasses me.


    ^^^^ This :) Its sad to see so much disgust and rudeness coming from others that should understand what it is like to be overweight and unhealthy. We should support each other...not tear each other down.
  • 0somuchbetter0
    0somuchbetter0 Posts: 1,335 Member
    Since I know most people won't go and read the other thread I just posted a link to, here's my post from that thread, written July 13:

    Well, it's definitely not for everyone. I can't speak for the entire obese population (who can?), but I can tell you a bit about my own story.

    Personally, I did it for my loved ones. I want my kids (age 8 and 5) to have a happy, active, healthy mom who they're not ashamed of and who will be around for a long long time). I want my husband to have a wife who he's proud of and who can keep up with his crazy hiking/kayaking/rock climbing adventures, and who he enjoys having sex with (!). I want my mom to grow old feeling peaceful and content about her daughter's future, who she's seen struggle with her weight and depression for most of her life.

    I had lap-band surgery just over 6 weeks ago and I know it was the absolute right decision for me.

    I'm 46 years old and have been obese for about 20 years. I've tried everything to lose weight, and I mean everything. I know more about nutrition, health, and physical fitness than most people I know. Even obese, I've always been as active as my body would allow -- going to the gym regularly, weight training, walking/jogging, biking... I love being active. The last 5 years or so it was becoming more and more difficult and painful, to the point that I spiraled into a pretty severe depression. Depression leads to shrinks and shrinks lead to self-examination...and I started learning a lot about myself.

    I know what and how I'm supposed to eat, but there was something that was stopping me from doing it right. I like to say that the little voice that tells you that you've had enough, that you'll regret eating that brownie, that yes, even if you eat it fast and no one is looking, it still counts...that voice is broken in me. I don't know how I broke it or how or when, but I've been working extremely hard (you have no idea!) to figure it out and fix it. About two years ago I decided to take a good hard look at myself -- I started keeping a journal not just about what I was eating, but why, and how I was feeling when I ate, etc. It was scary. Reading over that journal (which no one knows about...not even my husband...until now). I didn't recognize the person I was reading about. It brings me to tears just writing this...so I'll move on.

    I realized I had a real addiction to food. Not really to food, exactly, but to eating. Eating -- overeating, binging -- was doing things to my brain, and my brain was screaming for more and more. Yeah, you get high off the dopamine...and the cravings are intense. It's worse than quitting smoking, at least for me.

    When I finally stepped on the scale and looked at that number, I realized I had 120lbs to lose in order to be healthy. That number was overwhelming and I just didn't think I could do it alone. I started researching weight loss surgery and a lot of them scared me off. Gastric bypass, with its risks of malnutrition, physically re-routing the entire digestive tract, never being able to enjoy a glass of wine again? Not for me. The sleeve, where they remove a large portion of your stomach so that the food doesn't have time to be properly digested...no. There are a dozen others that are similar. I didn't like the idea of permanently physically changing my GI tract and all the problems that would come with that. The lap-band, while it does have potential risks, is less invasive, allows you to eat anything you want, and most importantly, is reversible if something goes wrong. I don't see it as a magical solution to all my problems. The band definitely requires more active participation on the part of the human -- there are ways to cheat the band where you could eat all day and pack away thousands of calories. I only see the band as a tool to help me face the huge number of pounds I need to lose and make it easier to make good choices. If I let myself go hungry for too long, I make bad choices....the band allows me to go 4-5 hours between meals on pretty small portions. I don't feel hungry except for the reasonable hunger pangs I should feel before I eat. By working with a nutritionist and a therapist (who specializes in addiction behavior and eating disorders), I think (I HOPE) I've pretty much beat the addiction monster. Sure, I had a piece of my son's birthday cake a few days ago, but it didn't turn me into a carb-and-sugar freak, shoving pound cakes and cheesecakes into my mouth when no one was looking. (Which, I'm ashamed to say, could have been the case a couple of years ago).

    In closing...

    The band (and weight loss surgery in general) is only a tool. If you don't fix what's in your head, you will regain the weight. As far as surgeries go, it was pretty easy for me. All surgery is risky. I had two babies (resulting in two c-sections because they were both breech), and even they were pretty easy compared to some of the horror stories I've heard. Compared to my c-sections, my band surgery was like having a cavity filled.

    Maybe some people think I'm weak for opting for surgery, that I've taken the "easy way out." To those people, I say you really don't know what you're talking about until you've experienced my life and my food addiction and my obesity first hand. But that's ok. There will always be someone on the sidelines of our lives, judging us for one decision or other. Best thing you can do is brush it off and do what's right for you.
  • I have several friends/family who have had weight loss surgery and continually go one and on about how well they've done. You know, constant FB updates etc. I personally lost my weight without surgery.
    Congratulations on you weight loss! :D
    I was wondering everyone's thoughts on this issue. Before you start blasting me (or each other) please note that this is intended to be a poll on what people think of weight loss surgery. Does surgery allow bragging rights?
    No, That is just their personality and has nothing to do the surgery. If not for the surgery they would probably find something else to brag about.
    Furthermore, I'm not putting down surgery as a viable medical alternative for those who may need it. Personally, I think it's over prescribed by the medical community/Insurance companies. However, thats my PERSONAL opinion, and I don't think less of anyone who may have that surgery.
    Insurance will actually tell you not to do surgery b/c that costs them money AND you have to jump through tons of hoops to get it.

    My sister had gastric bypass. Prior to surgery she lost 60lbs and everyone kept asking me why she went ahead with the surgery after loosing so much, she could just continue. She has always been able to loose weight but never enough to get to a healthy size. The problem is she would plateau and nothing she did would get her past it, she would be plateaued for 6-8 months. Very few people have that kind of will power to be able to continue past that. This last time she plateaued for 6 months and nothing her dietitian, nutritionist, doctor, and trainer did could get her past it. It was then she finally agreed to the surgery after much discussion and research. (She's been researching it for years. It was not a decision she made lightly.)

    So far she's lost 175lbs at last count including the previous 60lbs. She lost ME! And for the first time she could exercise like she's always wanted to but her feet and knees would limit her. She wanted to be able to run or even walk for a mile but couldn't b/c of the damage she was doing to her joints. She LOVES to exercise now and can walk for MILES! <3 and even ran 1/2 mile recently.

    The past surgeries(15+ years ago) were just that. Surgery and the doctor washed their hands of you. Now if you go to a reputable place it is a system. They teach you how to live a healthier lifestyle. Either instead of surgery or after surgery.

    I on the other hand I have been able to loose my weight b/c I never got up to that size and I've never needed to loose more than 20lbs.

    While yes, surgery allows you to loose a tremendous amount of weight relatively quickly, only lifestyle change will keep it off. Just like if you were able to loose it ( which is super impressive!!! Congrats! )

    P.S. There are more than one surgery, there are quite a few depending on what type of eating issue you have. My sister had issues with portion control and knew if she got the band then she'd just cheat it (soft foods or a grazer type eating habits) and fail. So she went with the gastric bypass, even though she wanted the gastric sleeve (mush less intense) but do to insurance limitations on choices and limits on funds she chose the bypass.
  • Wow, I am now completely disgusted with the human race and a number of people on MFP. For a place that is supposed to be about supporting one another, all these posts filled with hate are sad. Many of you should simply be ashamed of yourselves and attitudes. Bigoted, hateful and rude. Not to mention uneducated about the very thing you are going off on.

    That being said, I really don't care what anyone else thinks. I'm not doing this for you, or you or that guy over there. I care as much about your opinion of my choice to receive surgery as I do about what you think of my clothes or my car. That is to say, not one iota. I'm not doing this for anyone other than myself. For my health, for my happiness and to better my life. If you don't like that or the methods I use, I don't care.

    Now I am off to weep at the state of humanity. Sometimes my own race embarrasses me.


    ^^^^ This :) Its sad to see so much disgust and rudeness coming from others that should understand what it is like to be overweight and unhealthy. We should support each other...not tear each other down.

    I totally agree.
  • abberbabber
    abberbabber Posts: 972 Member
    Wow, I am now completely disgusted with the human race and a number of people on MFP. For a place that is supposed to be about supporting one another, all these posts filled with hate are sad. Many of you should simply be ashamed of yourselves and attitudes. Bigoted, hateful and rude. Not to mention uneducated about the very thing you are going off on.

    That being said, I really don't care what anyone else thinks. I'm not doing this for you, or you or that guy over there. I care as much about your opinion of my choice to receive surgery as I do about what you think of my clothes or my car. That is to say, not one iota. I'm not doing this for anyone other than myself. For my health, for my happiness and to better my life. If you don't like that or the methods I use, I don't care.

    Now I am off to weep at the state of humanity. Sometimes my own race embarrasses me.

    :flowerforyou:
  • abberbabber
    abberbabber Posts: 972 Member
    This reminds Me of the TLC show about those four people who had gastric bypass. I think it was "My 600lb life" or something. That show PISSED ME THE F*** OFF! Nothing but excuse after excuse, surgery after surgery. And then after 7 years only one guy kept all his weight off and lost more. You have nothing to brag about. You took the easy way out!

    Half my family has medical issues. Diabetes, hypertension, etc. The ones who are over weight (including myself but luckily I have no medical issues) started out well over 350lbs. At some point you have to put the spoon down, get off your fat butt and make a CHANGE! One by one everyone is making that lifestyle change. NOT with surgery, but working on themselves inside and out.

    You don't get bragging rights because you took shortcuts. Yeah good for you you've lost weight. But you also had over half your stomach stapled off. Meanwhile others are learning self control, making mistakes and falling down, but brushing themselves off and getting right back on the horse!

    Vent completed. :flowerforyou:

    This is beginning to feel like wrassling with a pig......
  • pljohnson001
    pljohnson001 Posts: 50 Member
    Essentially, the general consensus on this post is that I don't deserve to be proud of, nor should I be posting about my weight loss. Because I didn't do it myself. I cheated. I took the easy, lazy way out by having bariatric surgery. Since (as it has been proven by so many commenters' "close personal friends" and family members) I will gain all of it back, I therefore deserve no kudos, nor well wishes.

    Okay. Well thank you so very much for making that clear for me. I thought that my two hours of working out, 6 days a week, monitoring my calories and utilizing this tool (both my sleeve, AND MFP) were what was making me successful with losing the 75% of the 350 pounds I started out with needing to lose! I am so glad you were all here to let me know how wrong I was.

    So, for all of you who have positively commented and complimented me on my weight loss, I apologize for taking those remarks away from people on here who have lost their weight the honest way, with absolutely no help nor weight loss tools, as they are the only ones who's weight loss was truly worked for and earned, and have absolutely no possibility of gaining any of it back. Again, my sincerest apologies for taking away from those worthy "losers".


    You judgmental, uneducated, ignorant, donkey's arses!

    Well said.