really bad home issues... could use some help
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You are correct.
If he has not been diagnosed with it yet, then he can get it.
Both you and your Huisband need to join the Army..
Get away from whatever situation you are in.
Get a paycheck (DINK = pretty good living even as privates)
Let the Army give you REAL training for future employment beyond flipping burgers.
You will have at least four years of a steady paycheck.
The Army will not take you if you have bipolar disorder!
If he is in for longer then 90 days and they boot him for the disorder, then he gets out on a medical discharge and he STILL gets a paycheck for life PLUS free medical for life.
Because that is where our military dollars should go.
The Army is not a toy.
It is NOT a toy.
Most people who join the Military will serve the entire term and then leave as a better person.
They leave with a job skill and a new attitude and outlook on life.
Even if HE gets out on a med (if the bipolar is in fact "real" and not just an excuse), SHE can still serve and, while you need to be careful, you CAN support a family on a single Private's paycheck.
Thank you. Some of us join for REAL reasons, like to create a life for ourselves. The majority of those in the Army treat it as it should. yes there are some people who use it as a Toy but they will quickly learn in boot camp how much of a toy it is not. And that will solve another of her issues, weight loss and eating healthy. I lost so much weight in boot camp my mom thought I was starving myself.
The Army would be a GREAT option for you, even it is the National Guard. Get yourself out of toxic situations and away from Life Suckers. If you respect yourself in any fashion you will get off your butt and do something for yourself. Family and husband be damned. This is YOUR life, live it the way YOU want to.
You will not get much sympathy from those on here unless you have exhausted EVERY avenue presented to you and then some. Everyone has had struggles and most people FIGHT for what they want. You will have to do the same as most every other person in the world.0 -
i knew that was going to come up a lot. i know how some people can be and just say to move out like it would be that easy, if it was going to be that easy i would of done it by now.
i have one person in this town ( besides my husband and father in law) that i can go to for help/advice.
its already been said by the rest of the family that if my sister in law would move out it would make most of the stress and 99% of our problems go away, but that still wouldnt help the food situation much
That's the thing though. We know it's not going to be easy. Some of us have been in similar situations.
The best option isn't necessarily the easiest option. Do you want to have an easy solution, or do you want to save your sanity?
Exactly.
There are times I worked two jobs, seven days a week. There was even a time when I had no car to get to those jobs and had to bum rides off coworkers - even to the grocery store - until I was able to get a car.
When times are tough, you buckle down. Get a job anywhere- the gas station, McDonald's, the department store. I know times are tough out there, but when you have no job and desperately need one, there are some out there. You just can't be picky. You can't afford to be.
Not only will getting a job bring you an income, but it will give you an outlet. Something else to focus on. something else to do rather than sit around the house feeling sorry for yourself and wanting to strangle your family members.
I'm not trying to be nasty, but I'm stating the facts.
If you're not willing to step up and hold yourself accountable, then I can't drum up much sympathy. I've been there. I've been broke and terrified and depressed and heartbroken. I did something about it and pulled myself up. I'm not the only one. Many here have done the same thing, I'm sure.
Exactly! It will also provide some self esteem so you stope visualizing yourself as a victim and start to see the only person holding you back from greatness is you!
I lived in similar desperate times. I worked two jobs then decided I didn't want to work that hard for the rest of my life so I quit one and went to college. No car. Many times I studied on the bus. In the summer I rode my bike to work and school. I walked to the grocery store nearly every day because I could only carry so much. Then my sister gave my daughter a wagon and I was able to go weekly.
The day Exhole told me he wasn't applying for a job at McDonald's because he wasn't working for $8 an hour while I was working two jobs was the day I knew I would divorce him. I could fail with him or I could pull up my leopard print big girl panties, make it on my own, and be an example to my daughter.
My advice to you: Take that walk and figure out where you want to be next year. Then figure out how to get there.0 -
So happy someone suggested your calling 2-1-1. They should be near you and could really point you in the right direction for resources. Cudos to the young lady who also offered her services to review your resume. Best of luck to you.0
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Your sister in law is very foolish. Getting pregnant is the wrong thing to do and will make the situation worse. Not to mention, a person who only wants to play video games will be a lousy mother. I am VERY familiar with this situation and the personalities you've detailed in your description. Though you don't want to hear the correct advice, I'm going to give it to you, anyway, so forgive me. You have absolutely no control over the other people in the house, so don't even bother. Either they must go or you and your husband must go. Don't say it isn't possible, it is possible... it just isn't easy. The situation is exactly the same as weight loss. Losing weight is not easy, Step 1, you must decide to do something about it, step 2, you must make changes to achieve the goal, Step 3, watch the weight come off one ounce at a time. Now, use the same plan for changing your living situation. Step 1, decide to do something about it, Step 2, make changes (find another job, stop buying things you may not need, only absolute necessitites), Step 3, watch the money roll in and set it aside into a separate bank account, one dollar at a time. You would not expect to lose 30 pounds over night. You lose it one pound.... no, one ounce at a time. Same with saving money. Don't wait for someone to hand it to you, and don't wait to win the lottery.... you can save 10 or twenty dollars at a time...or just one or two. It will add and bring you closer to your goal... and knowing you are doing something about it will make the whole situation more bearable, until you are finally able to move out. Just like weight loss, you can do this too. Otherwise your situation will only get worse and worse and it will spill over into other parts of your life. Don't let that happen, take back control. Hope this helps.
Excellent analogy!0 -
Wow... I totally forgot about the weight loss aspect of it.
You are correct.
If he has not been diagnosed with it yet, then he can get it.
Both you and your Huisband need to join the Army..
Get away from whatever situation you are in.
Get a paycheck (DINK = pretty good living even as privates)
Let the Army give you REAL training for future employment beyond flipping burgers.
You will have at least four years of a steady paycheck.
The Army will not take you if you have bipolar disorder!
If he is in for longer then 90 days and they boot him for the disorder, then he gets out on a medical discharge and he STILL gets a paycheck for life PLUS free medical for life.
Because that is where our military dollars should go.
The Army is not a toy.
It is NOT a toy.
Most people who join the Military will serve the entire term and then leave as a better person.
They leave with a job skill and a new attitude and outlook on life.
Even if HE gets out on a med (if the bipolar is in fact "real" and not just an excuse), SHE can still serve and, while you need to be careful, you CAN support a family on a single Private's paycheck.
Thank you. Some of us join for REAL reasons, like to create a life for ourselves. The majority of those in the Army treat it as it should. yes there are some people who use it as a Toy but they will quickly learn in boot camp how much of a toy it is not. And that will solve another of her issues, weight loss and eating healthy. I lost so much weight in boot camp my mom thought I was starving myself.
The Army would be a GREAT option for you, even it is the National Guard. Get yourself out of toxic situations and away from Life Suckers. If you respect yourself in any fashion you will get off your butt and do something for yourself. Family and husband be damned. This is YOUR life, live it the way YOU want to.
You will not get much sympathy from those on here unless you have exhausted EVERY avenue presented to you and then some. Everyone has had struggles and most people FIGHT for what they want. You will have to do the same as most every other person in the world.
In my case, it was weight GAIN but, I entered basic as a 145 LB kid and, 11 weeks later I was a solid 165 LBS.
A year later I was 175 and 5 years after that, I left at a solid 220.0 -
This has to be fake, right?
For the sake of this being possibly 'real' -- I'm happy to share my brutally insensitive thoughts:
Everyone needs to go, including your deadbeat husband. He sucks. Who gets fired from McDonald's unless you're blatantly stealing? If he can't hack it there, then that should be a tell tale sign that you can find someone better. Divorces are expensive, so just leave.
If he's physically able to work - he should. You're stating he has bipolar, so he got fired. Well, what else does he do all day? Look at porn with the communal internet?
You live in a house with your in-laws. Good God. I would want to get the hell out of there as quickly as possible. Everyone in that house sounds like pathetic leeches. If I was the landlord, I would have all of their sorry as*es evicted tomorrow, since they're not even making a point to pay partial rent.
20 hours / week? Seriously...? Don't kill yourself with the part time job. [/sarcasm] Why not ask for more hours? Or get another job? And how do you get laid off from McDonald's as an hourly worker? Is that even possible?
I'm with what the other poster suggested: Join the military. It doesn't have to be the Army or the Marines. At the very least you collect a paycheck, get your *kitten* in shape, and obtain some real world experience and job training.0 -
i never once tried to play victim, never wanted any sympathy it was more of just a background of how much stress i have here
when i moved here i had to help take care of my mother in law, then i had to do it while working 40 hours a week. the only reason i worked at mcdonalds is for the fact that i needed a job and it was the first place to hire me.
my father in law is the name on the welfare account, me him and his sons get food stamps.
when i first moved here my father in law was getting cash assistance because he had just lost his job, his daughter was over 21 (the only child that was) and was to also work hers off. when she didnt she was no longer qualified for cash assistance or food stamps thats why she was never on it ( as long as ive lived here)
my husband was told that he was bipolar before i moved here (he would of been about 14 -15 when they did ) he said that they wouldnt give him medication for it because it messed with his diabetic medication... i dont know how true that is, i didnt live here at the time
and as for my husband being hateful or taking his anger out on me... that has never happened yes we argue once in a while but that is it. he knows i wont deal with it.
and for the idiots that try to say that im making this up, trying to get money from people you really need to go somewhere else and be a pain in the *kitten*.
ive already said that i was still trying to find a second job, and i do apply for everything i could possibly work for.0 -
Praying for you !!!!!!
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You need to get out of this living situation. Period. It doesn't matter how you do it, just do it.i never once tried to play victim, never wanted any sympathy it was more of just a background of how much stress i have here
when i moved here i had to help take care of my mother in law, then i had to do it while working 40 hours a week. the only reason i worked at mcdonalds is for the fact that i needed a job and it was the first place to hire me.
my father in law is the name on the welfare account, me him and his sons get food stamps.
when i first moved here my father in law was getting cash assistance because he had just lost his job, his daughter was over 21 (the only child that was) and was to also work hers off. when she didnt she was no longer qualified for cash assistance or food stamps thats why she was never on it ( as long as ive lived here)
my husband was told that he was bipolar before i moved here (he would of been about 14 -15 when they did ) he said that they wouldnt give him medication for it because it messed with his diabetic medication... i dont know how true that is, i didnt live here at the time
and as for my husband being hateful or taking his anger out on me... that has never happened yes we argue once in a while but that is it. he knows i wont deal with it.
and for the idiots that try to say that im making this up, trying to get money from people you really need to go somewhere else and be a pain in the *kitten*.
ive already said that i was still trying to find a second job, and i do apply for everything i could possibly work for.0 -
Making this up to get money? Are you kidding me? If she wanted to do that she seriously needs to work on her story telling skills and research forums (MFP? Yeah OK).
Good luck OP. I personally would leave my DH if he refused to work and better his life. He needs to get a job now.
Oh and don't listen to the advice about joining Mary Kay, Pampered Chef, etc ...those companies rely on their "employees" buying the bulk of their product and then the employee is left trying to sell it (and they rarely make ANY profit).0 -
Making this up to get money? Are you kidding me? If she wanted to do that she seriously needs to work on her story telling skills and research forums (MFP? Yeah OK).0
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I'm starting to think this is a troll thread. Calling major bs on the OP
For the remainder of the day I shall call you Genius. I can't believe it took nearly 4 whole pages of posts before someone figured this out. OP is looking for foolish people to send her money, I bet the paypal account is all set up and ready for action.
I do not think this is the case at all. Nice try though, I think it's just a girl who is having a really hard time and has no one to reach out to. This is a support community and she never once asked for a handout. Clearly she is frustrated with the people in her life who rely on handouts. So can we show a little compassion?0 -
thank you....
i know some people are just idiots and just so these idiots know ive been writing about whats been going on for months now
http://www.opendiary.com/entrylist.asp?authorcode=D930084 a lot of this is mainly venting (OD not here)0 -
thank you....
i know some people are just idiots and just so these idiots know ive been writing about whats been going on for months now
http://www.opendiary.com/entrylist.asp?authorcode=D930084 a lot of this is mainly venting (OD not here)
Really? You are calling other people idiots? Now that's funny. If I'm the idiot, why don't you tell me how you should fix your problems? You have pages and pages of people offering you support and suggestions on here, and you have a reason why none of those solutions will work. My very smart mother once told me "You can't help someone that really doesn't want to be helped."0 -
i was talking about the IDIOTS that said that i was making all of this up and trying to get money out of people that was no towards anyone trying to help.0
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so you've been a liar and a begger for months? Good for you. Try getting a lifethank you....
i know some people are just idiots and just so these idiots know ive been writing about whats been going on for months now
http://www.opendiary.com/entrylist.asp?authorcode=D930084 a lot of this is mainly venting (OD not here)0 -
i was talking about the IDIOTS that said that i was making all of this up and trying to get money out of people that was no towards anyone trying to help.
Join the Army.
End of story.
It is easy, quick, and will solve your financial problems AND will get you in the best physical shape you have ever been in.
AND you will gain a job skill that you can use for the rest of your life.
I am failing to see how many other choices you have.
Unless you are happy being on welfare/food stamps0 -
i was talking about the IDIOTS that said that i was making all of this up and trying to get money out of people that was no towards anyone trying to help.
Join the Army.
End of story.
It is easy, quick, and will solve your financial problems AND will get you in the best physical shape you have ever been in.
AND you will gain a job skill that you can use for the rest of your life.
I am failing to see how many other choices you have.
Unless you are happy being on welfare/food stamps
This is not always an option. My 18 year old son can't enlist because he didn't make weight by 6 pounds. He has to lose the weight first before they'll let him in. So, everyone who keeps saying "Join the Army" "Join the Army" like it's some be all end all to the situation needs to chill for a second. It may not be as quick and easy as you might think. IF it's an option, I say great!!! Army, National Guard, Air Force...whatever, but just think for a moment...it may NOT be an option at all.0 -
Yeah, that was me idiot.i was talking about the IDIOTS that said that i was making all of this up and trying to get money out of people that was no towards anyone trying to help.0 -
I think this woman is trying to get a rise out of you; she is feeding off your hurt to make herself happy. That why she keeps returning to the post.
Follow the advice from others hun, they know what they are talking about and genuinely trying to help. Again, if you need someone to talk to you can send me a message.0
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