Cheating on your Spouse

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  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
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    cheating is generally a symptom of a bigger issue in the relationship. If people talked freely in their relationship about what they needed and partners were honest about their abilities to meet these needs there would rarely be an issue in the first place.
  • cleanandlean2012
    cleanandlean2012 Posts: 71 Member
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    I find this really tragic. I got married on my 19th birthday, next year we have been married 19 years. There are several things that spring to mind immediately - but most importantly the following has to be a commitment from both parties:

    - we always talk, communication is an absolute must. I am not saying this is easy, we have gone through years where it has been a doddle, we have worked together and talked all the time, we have also gone through times where we have both been working crazy hours, but somewhere along the line we made time to keep our marriage together. So far, what I have learnt is that most marriages take work, commitment and time. Even a perfect match will have trials, times of fun, hardship etc
    - we make a point not to put ourselves in an environment that could be tempting or enable an emotional relationship to develop with another person
    - we are honest
    - we live for each other and have learnt to understand why each of us has certain annoying habits - we work with what we have, rather than trying to change.
    - we understand that there is no perfect person, therefore dont believe the grass is ever greener

    As I said, although the above is great, it has no foundation unless both of you want to same things out of life.
  • lauren3101
    lauren3101 Posts: 1,853 Member
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    My actions are worse? Okay. I'm guessing you're one of her friends, or a fellow cheater. You make me laugh.

    Not at all. I was just the child in that situation and it sucked. And none of it was my fault, but I suffered most. Lauren's SO abused her. She reacted the only way she could think to at the time. As did you. You hurt innocent children. She hurt an abuser. Which is worse?

    Are both wrong in their ways? Sure. But one is definitely worse than the other.

    Unlike you, though, I won't lecture and chastise someone for making the only decision she could in the moment. You have a lot of nerve, though.

    How can you sit there and say that she hurt her children??? She saved her children from having to experience what you went through and yet you are coming down on her for removing her children from the exact environment that you painfully had to grow up in.... So what are you saying she should have done exactly??

    The point she is trying to make is that the children were brought into an already abusive relationship. Bringing a child (2, in this case!) into that kind of relationship and way of life is wrong - in my opinion.
  • Scott
    Scott Posts: 204 MFP Staff
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    This topic has been locked. The OP's question was answered and then the post started to de-rail. Please remember to keep your conversation civilized and respectful. You can disagree, but do it tastefully.

    Cheers,
    Scott
    MyFitnessPal Staff
This discussion has been closed.