Best Gym Pick-Up Lines

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  • dare2love81
    dare2love81 Posts: 928 Member
    You mean gyms aren't a good place to find my forever husband? Crap. Maybe I should see if I can revoke the annual membership I just renewed. :noway:
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  • HermioneDanger118
    HermioneDanger118 Posts: 345 Member
    Next time you should try, "Are you using that adductor machine so you can crush me between your thighs later?"

    :laugh:
  • Plates559
    Plates559 Posts: 869 Member
    A girl was doing cleans and her and I have the same trainer. I walked up to him to say hi, and he says "You should see her snatch, its perfect"

    I then awkwardly tried to think of something to reply...

    "I'd love to see your snatch sometime" nope
    "You should see my snatch" no no no
    "I bet you have a real big snatch" no way
    "I like to get really chalky when it comes to dealing with snatches" oh no
    "My snatch is real tight right now, I need to loosen up a bit to get deeper" better not
  • Plates559
    Plates559 Posts: 869 Member
    For those who don't know, the snatch is an Olympic Lift involving moving a weighted barbell from ground to over head in one swift movement.
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  • Dub_D
    Dub_D Posts: 1,760 Member
    The worst part is that you called me Poohbear :mad:
    Really? The testicle-part... you're good with that.. just don't call you a Disney character? Seriously?

    I didn't realize we're making cute little nicknames for each other, Kitten Pickles :flowerforyou:
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  • dare2love81
    dare2love81 Posts: 928 Member
    You mean gyms aren't a good place to find my forever husband? Crap. Maybe I should see if I can revoke the annual membership I just renewed. :noway:
    You can't. I'm your gym's attorney.

    Yes, please.
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  • penrbrown
    penrbrown Posts: 2,685 Member
    Eh. I'm too fat to get hit on.

    But I would like to say that I think it's tremendously sad that you cannot be friendly without people assuming you're flirting. What a frickin world we live in.
  • Plates559
    Plates559 Posts: 869 Member
    A girl was doing cleans and her and I have the same trainer. I walked up to him to say hi, and he says "You should see her snatch, its perfect"

    I then awkwardly tried to think of something to reply...

    "I'd love to see your snatch sometime" nope
    "You should see my snatch" no no no
    "I bet you have a real big snatch" no way
    "I like to get really chalky when it comes to dealing with snatches" oh no
    "My snatch is real tight right now, I need to loosen up a bit to get deeper" better not
    "Her snatch has nothing on my clean-and-jerk."

    "Women who excel at cleaning usually have a strong snatch"
  • TheeGeeMarie
    TheeGeeMarie Posts: 59 Member
    Yes. My parents hated hammers, so it's just how I was raised.
    Going to Home Depot must be a nightmare for you.

    Obviously... all those lazy hammers just hanging around, hoping someone will pick them up and put them to work. See what I did there? The puns!

    In all seriousness folks, I have nothing against hammers.
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  • sewerchick93
    sewerchick93 Posts: 1,438 Member
    I had just finished on the treadmill and went to get a drink when a guy came up behind and said; "I really liked your swing when you were walking, I sure would like to hang it on my front porch" . After I openly and intently ogled his "front porch" I replied "sorry hon, but I don't see any front porch. All I see is a tiny little stoop" and walked away.
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  • BeingAwesome247
    BeingAwesome247 Posts: 1,171 Member
    I don't work out at the gym but my sister worked at one for almost a year and the owners' transferred her & the manager to one of their locations only 10mins from my house.
    I'd regularly visit her & just hang out behind the desk and chat with the other ppl working there or the trainers if she was busy.

    It wasn't until a few different times of visiting that it dawned on me that one of the trainers would hit on me every time I was there lol my sister's response "DUH"

    Usually it was the "you should come in sometime...if you're her sister & I'm working you wouldn't have to pay"

    "I'd be happy to schedule a free training session with ya....ya'know family discount"

    I'm so dense when it comes to this stuff that I just thought he was being nice :laugh:
  • BSchoberg
    BSchoberg Posts: 712 Member
    Didn't go through all the responses, so pardon any repetition - but dude, the first (married) sister/friend was hitting on YOU, Gorilla! Questions about form? Meh... more like the perfect opening line to a meathead like you. :wink:
  • sewerchick93
    sewerchick93 Posts: 1,438 Member
    I had just finished on the treadmill and went to get a drink when a guy came up behind and said; "I really liked your swing when you were walking, I sure would like to hang it on my front porch" . After I openly and intently ogled his "front porch" I replied "sorry hon, but I don't see any front porch. All I see is a tiny little stoop" and walked away.
    Did you Z-Snap too?

    of course, how else would he know I was serious?
  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member
    Gosh. I feel left out..... I have never been hit on at the gym. Probably because I always have my business face on and sweat 30x as much as my peers. Not exactly the sexiest look out there. :wink:
  • melduf
    melduf Posts: 468 Member
    I was never hit on at the gym. But the funniest thing I was told was the day after Prince William got married. One of the trainers asked me if all my hopes of a good marriage had gone up in flames. I told him I was already married to the nicest man on earth. One of the customers following me said "I wouldn't want Prince Charles and his oreilles de christ as a father in law for all the gold in the world"

    For those who don't know, oreilles (wich means ear) de christ is a traditional Quebec dish consisting of deep-fried smoked pork jowls.
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  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member
    Gosh. I feel left out..... I have never been hit on at the gym. Probably because I always have my business face on and sweat 30x as much as my peers. Not exactly the sexiest look out there. :wink:
    I like sweaty business chicks. Just sayin.

    :happy:
  • BlairCottier
    BlairCottier Posts: 171 Member
    A girl was doing cleans and her and I have the same trainer. I walked up to him to say hi, and he says "You should see her snatch, its perfect"

    I then awkwardly tried to think of something to reply...

    "I'd love to see your snatch sometime" nope
    "You should see my snatch" no no no
    "I bet you have a real big snatch" no way
    "I like to get really chalky when it comes to dealing with snatches" oh no
    "My snatch is real tight right now, I need to loosen up a bit to get deeper" better not

    OMG, I just laughed for 10 minutes. Especially because I had no clue what you were really talking about until i read your next post, lol. It always makes me laugh to watch people at the gym. I have never been hit on myself, but I always catch people staring, which doesn't bother me because I do the same thing. Its always nice to have something pretty to look at when you're working out :wink: I do hate it though when I go to the group classes they have (I do piloxing) and you always see the same old men walking by the door 50 times, or just taking a seat on the bench right outside the door. Gross.
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  • jennifer52484
    jennifer52484 Posts: 888 Member
    I was on the elliptical and a guy taps me on my shoulder and scared me.. when i turned around he said " you are looking really good" . It actually made me feel good that someone noticed me at the gym lol
  • heatherloveslifting
    heatherloveslifting Posts: 1,428 Member
    While on a treadmill I heard a guy ask a girl "Where you trying to get to so fast?"
    Her response... "My pepper-spray."

    I love it :)
  • penrbrown
    penrbrown Posts: 2,685 Member
    I do hate it though when I go to the group classes they have (I do piloxing) and you always see the same old men walking by the door 50 times, or just taking a seat on the bench right outside the door. Gross.
    WTF is "piloxing?" You just made that up, admit it.

    "Yeah, I was uh, on the weightliptical. Then I did some run-ups and aerobofarting."

    http://www.piloxing.com/
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