Guys, be honest,....

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Replies

  • Miss_dannii
    Miss_dannii Posts: 1,351 Member
    I'd doubt it. Would you as a woman look at an overweight or obese man and say wow he's hot?
    Yes.

    Good for you
  • So...personal preference is fine, as long as said you fit said preference and if you don't they're shallow and a bit of a knobber?

    Riiiiiiiiight.

    Please clarify. I don't understand.
  • sho3girl
    sho3girl Posts: 10,799 Member
    well yeah its a beauty is in the eye of the beholder kind of thing

    truely believe you can find something wonderful about every person ... some people hide it better than others so harder to find... not just "fat" but attitude .
  • Matt_Wild
    Matt_Wild Posts: 2,673 Member
    For me, everyone is attractive in their own right. How they are, how they act and how they speak.

    For a physical sexual relationship I'd struggle to date a woman who doesn't train. Lifestyle and thus look wouldn't mix. Doesn't mix, have been there before.
  • So...personal preference is fine, as long as said you fit said preference and if you don't they're shallow and a bit of a knobber?

    Riiiiiiiiight.

    Please clarify. I don't understand.
  • harvo
    harvo Posts: 4,676 Member
    I prefer thick women so i am not sure what your criteria are for overweight or obese but I know that when I was closer to 200 I had more females talking to me and wanting to hang out. As I gain weight they may talk to me but it is definately in the friend zone only...
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    ive always found that people become more attractive once you get to know them and know their personality


    so if you got to know a say 250 lb women, and you liked her personality, and she was an awesome woman, she'd be attractive to you?

    It certainly happens.

    I assume you're asking this question because of your own weight. Your husband is going to look at other women. That's what men do. He would do it if you were a super model.

    The real question is, does he love you and do you trust him? That's all that matters.
  • russellalr
    russellalr Posts: 11 Member
    For myself i so agree with your posting. I have gone up and down my whole life. and when iam up on the scales. I looking for a bigger guy. if iam thinner its like i feel like ok iam worthy of a thiner guy. I know it should not be that way but thats how i feel.
  • Easywider
    Easywider Posts: 434 Member
    I'm sure this opinion has been expressed.

    Overweight girls are just fine and plenty cute.

    Obese anything is unattractive...Aside from plain ole sexual disinterest, it shows that our lifestyles are on two entirely different plains. It's not pretension..just not for me.


    Footnote: No matter how great a person's looks/features are..they will only captivate you for so long. There needs something significant anchoring that attraction.
  • AntWrig
    AntWrig Posts: 2,273 Member
    You never look at an overweight or obese girl and say "damn she's hot. do you?? I've even caught my husband saying how thin women are hot, but never any that are overweight or obese.

    And i doubt you hear women looking at obese men and saying "God Id love to use his belly as a blanket, I'd say he sweats loads"

    Fat people being overly sweaty is a myth.
    Also, I used to love to lay on my ex boyfriend's fat belly. It made a lovely pillow.

    A big soft sweaty pillow i'd imagine. Lol.

    Relax, I use to have a big fat sweaty belly, I'm surprised my partner didn;t point it out sooner
    You were just fat and sweaty. I never was sweaty.. then again I didn't have problems with the ladies either.
  • firstsip
    firstsip Posts: 8,399 Member
    To respond to some points, and just keep this fun party on a roll (excuse the pun):

    The whole debate between people going, "Well, I don't like overweight people, and I think it's instinctual to be attracted to healthier people" and the people going, "HA! I like overweight men/women. I proved you wrong" is that awful sort of anecdotal business at work that tries hard to work against norms, but doesn't necessarily go about it in the most productive way.

    There's nothing wrong with being outside of the norm; being attracted to the same sex, which is NOT an issue of a deepseated desire to "further the species," is obviously perfectly fine and natural... but there's also lots of science on why homosexuality even exists in so many species. And it's not necessarily to procreate, but generally to further the progress of a species.

    That being said, if you happen to not be attracted to what is considered a evolutionary jackpot, your anecdotal experience doesn't mean that this principle is wrong. Hell, the people who are bringing up, "Well, thin is just the new standard of beauty; it used to be heavier" is an anthropological trend... and is pretty recent in the hundreds of thousands of years of evolution of homo sapiens. There's still a reason studies keep getting posted saying, "Hey, straight women are still attracted to tall guys with facial hair because it's an appearance of more testosterone and thus they are more likely to protect them" or "Straight men still find women with hourglass figures appealing because the development of secondary sexual characteristics still appears to be the strongest signal of fertility."

    Do all men dig the hourglass shape? No. Do all women dig tall guys with facial hair? No.

    We, as a society, are part of centuries worth of being the (subjectively, depending on context) dominant species on the planet, and the innate desire to mate with what furthers the species is waning and/or changing. Intelligence was obviously important enough to get us from picking berries off trees and scratching our butts to picking iPads off shelves and picking our butts; incidentally, many people in this thread saying they still found overweight/obese men and/or women attractive could agree with intelligence being a key factor in attraction. Here, communication is clearly being a cue as strong as if not stronger than physical attributes.

    So, the core here is: everything is constantly changing whether we see it or not, and we are in the midst of change and progress as we speak. To be attracted to "outside" the norm is becoming, well, more normal, because we're in millenia worth of "comfort," so not everyone is born to develop this huge urge to spread the seed or nurture the young (hell, no one's even touched on asexualism here).

    But a few millenia of change is not quite enough in the scheme of hundreds of thousands of years of evolution, so to fault (what appears to be) a majority for thoughts and feelings they can't control is just as harmful as faulting the minority who veer in a different direction.

    /Hermione.

    And the whole "fat is sweaty" thing probably stems from the mordibly obese requiring much more effort to accomplish daily functions (walking up stairs, etc.), so they are more in a state of exertion walking a block than someone much lighter or fitter. Of course, people can be prone to sweatiness regardless of weight or health status, as a big part of it's genetics (and sweating more is a sign of better inner temperature control, so THERE YOU GO).
  • Why would anyone want an overweight Girlfriend ?

    I don't even......


    BRB 9 different chin
    BRB Flab
    BRB It isnt attractive one bit
  • crisanderson27
    crisanderson27 Posts: 5,343 Member
    To respond to some points, and just keep this fun party on a roll (excuse the pun):

    The whole debate between people going, "Well, I don't like overweight people, and I think it's instinctual to be attracted to healthier people" and the people going, "HA! I like overweight men/women. I proved you wrong" is that awful sort of anecdotal business at work that tries hard to work against norms, but doesn't necessarily go about it in the most productive way.

    There's nothing wrong with being outside of the norm; being attracted to the same sex, which is NOT an issue of a deepseated desire to "further the species," is obviously perfectly fine and natural... but there's also lots of science on why homosexuality even exists in so many species. And it's not necessarily to procreate, but generally to further the progress of a species.

    That being said, if you happen to not be attracted to what is considered a evolutionary jackpot, your anecdotal experience doesn't mean that this principle is wrong. Hell, the people who are bringing up, "Well, thin is just the new standard of beauty; it used to be heavier" is an anthropological trend... and is pretty recent in the hundreds of thousands of years of evolution of homo sapiens. There's still a reason studies keep getting posted saying, "Hey, straight women are still attracted to tall guys with facial hair because it's an appearance of more testosterone and thus they are more likely to protect them" or "Straight men still find women with hourglass figures appealing because the development of secondary sexual characteristics still appears to be the strongest signal of fertility."

    Do all men dig the hourglass shape? No. Do all women dig tall guys with facial hair? No.

    We, as a society, are part of centuries worth of being the (subjectively, depending on context) dominant species on the planet, and the innate desire to mate with what furthers the species is waning and/or changing. Intelligence was obviously important enough to get us from picking berries off trees and scratching our butts to picking iPads off shelves and picking our butts; incidentally, many people in this thread saying they still found overweight/obese men and/or women attractive could agree with intelligence being a key factor in attraction. Here, communication is clearly being a cue as strong as if not stronger than physical attributes.

    So, the core here is: everything is constantly changing whether we see it or not, and we are in the midst of change and progress as we speak. To be attracted to "outside" the norm is becoming, well, more normal, because we're in millenia worth of "comfort," so not everyone is born to develop this huge urge to spread the seed or nurture the young (hell, no one's even touched on asexualism here).

    But a few millenia of change is not quite enough in the scheme of hundreds of thousands of years of evolution, so to fault (what appears to be) a majority for thoughts and feelings they can't control is just as harmful as faulting the minority who veer in a different direction.

    /Hermione.

    And the whole "fat is sweaty" thing probably stems from the mordibly obese requiring much more effort to accomplish daily functions (walking up stairs, etc.), so they are more in a state of exertion walking a block than someone much lighter or fitter. Of course, people can be prone to sweatiness regardless of weight or health status, as a big part of it's genetics (and sweating more is a sign of better inner temperature control, so THERE YOU GO).

    ♡♥♡♥

    That is all :).
  • firstsip
    firstsip Posts: 8,399 Member
    To respond to some points, and just keep this fun party on a roll (excuse the pun):

    The whole debate between people going, "Well, I don't like overweight people, and I think it's instinctual to be attracted to healthier people" and the people going, "HA! I like overweight men/women. I proved you wrong" is that awful sort of anecdotal business at work that tries hard to work against norms, but doesn't necessarily go about it in the most productive way.

    There's nothing wrong with being outside of the norm; being attracted to the same sex, which is NOT an issue of a deepseated desire to "further the species," is obviously perfectly fine and natural... but there's also lots of science on why homosexuality even exists in so many species. And it's not necessarily to procreate, but generally to further the progress of a species.

    That being said, if you happen to not be attracted to what is considered a evolutionary jackpot, your anecdotal experience doesn't mean that this principle is wrong. Hell, the people who are bringing up, "Well, thin is just the new standard of beauty; it used to be heavier" is an anthropological trend... and is pretty recent in the hundreds of thousands of years of evolution of homo sapiens. There's still a reason studies keep getting posted saying, "Hey, straight women are still attracted to tall guys with facial hair because it's an appearance of more testosterone and thus they are more likely to protect them" or "Straight men still find women with hourglass figures appealing because the development of secondary sexual characteristics still appears to be the strongest signal of fertility."

    Do all men dig the hourglass shape? No. Do all women dig tall guys with facial hair? No.

    We, as a society, are part of centuries worth of being the (subjectively, depending on context) dominant species on the planet, and the innate desire to mate with what furthers the species is waning and/or changing. Intelligence was obviously important enough to get us from picking berries off trees and scratching our butts to picking iPads off shelves and picking our butts; incidentally, many people in this thread saying they still found overweight/obese men and/or women attractive could agree with intelligence being a key factor in attraction. Here, communication is clearly being a cue as strong as if not stronger than physical attributes.

    So, the core here is: everything is constantly changing whether we see it or not, and we are in the midst of change and progress as we speak. To be attracted to "outside" the norm is becoming, well, more normal, because we're in millenia worth of "comfort," so not everyone is born to develop this huge urge to spread the seed or nurture the young (hell, no one's even touched on asexualism here).

    But a few millenia of change is not quite enough in the scheme of hundreds of thousands of years of evolution, so to fault (what appears to be) a majority for thoughts and feelings they can't control is just as harmful as faulting the minority who veer in a different direction.

    /Hermione.

    And the whole "fat is sweaty" thing probably stems from the mordibly obese requiring much more effort to accomplish daily functions (walking up stairs, etc.), so they are more in a state of exertion walking a block than someone much lighter or fitter. Of course, people can be prone to sweatiness regardless of weight or health status, as a big part of it's genetics (and sweating more is a sign of better inner temperature control, so THERE YOU GO).

    ♡♥♡♥

    That is all :).

    :blushing:
  • myofibril
    myofibril Posts: 4,500 Member
    You never look at an overweight or obese girl and say "damn she's hot. do you??

    It's possible but not probable.
  • dansls1
    dansls1 Posts: 309 Member
    ive always found that people become more attractive once you get to know them and know their personality

    This.
  • Tbh most fat girls look half decent once they get to around 120lbs or something srs
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    Tbh most fat girls look half decent once they get to around 120lbs or something srs

    You are a something I'm not going to say because it's not worh the strike. Based on your posts. I'd guess you're about 20 years old or younger. I didn't date boys your age when I WAS that age for a reason.
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    Tbh most fat girls look half decent once they get to around 120lbs or something srs

    You realize a number that low isn't healthy for anybody over about 5 ft 5?

    Seriously.
    I hope women never hear you spew this ignorant tripe.
  • Tbh most fat girls look half decent once they get to around 120lbs or something srs

    You realize a number that low isn't healthy for anybody over about 5 ft 5?

    Seriously.
    I hope women never hear you spew this ignorant tripe.
    Comparing to the BMI,

    lol

    strong logic, just checked and that says healthy for women up to 5'9
  • FlaxMilk
    FlaxMilk Posts: 3,452 Member
    I've been wondering where you are Umeboshi. I enjoy your perspectives and your ability to debate them.

    That said, I don't think the poster who made the original comment is an *kitten*, based on his other posts on the board. I also didn't take his comment to mean "should" lose weight. From what he wrote, I took it as a very brief thought in his head before he moves on, with no real emotional or judgmental qualities other than the visceral physical reaction.

    I do think people who sit and dwell on a complete stranger's appearance and judge the way they should change to meet a certain attractiveness and think critical thoughts about that person's character and such is heading toward the *kitten* category. But not this particular person who made this post.
  • witchy_wife
    witchy_wife Posts: 792 Member
    I guess I can kinda understand what OP is saying. When me and my hubby met I was 50lbs heavier (he was almost 130lbs heavier). He saw a photo of me online (Myspace) and added me and started chatting me up. So I don't for a second doubt that he thought I was hot. But out of the famous people I know he likes, it's types like Jessica Alba and that Next model Naomie something or other. Both slim ladies. But I know he wasn't lying when he told me how much he fancied me.

    So maybe it's more just "eye candy" kind of thing? Doesn't mean he doesn't find you hot. Same way that I find my husband super sexy now, just as I did when he was 130lbs heavier. I still mostly watch True Blood for the bits where Vampire Eric gets his kit off but doesn't mean that I don't find my husband hot just because he is heavier.
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    Tbh most fat girls look half decent once they get to around 120lbs or something srs

    You realize a number that low isn't healthy for anybody over about 5 ft 5?

    Seriously.
    I hope women never hear you spew this ignorant tripe.
    Comparing to the BMI,

    lol

    strong logic, just checked and that says healthy for women up to 5'9
    A 5'9 woman who weighs 120 will be told to eat, and right away.
    At 5'8 120 I looked downright sickly. If that's what you want, have at it.
    Women have enough issues with their bodies without boys like you, parading around as men spewing ignorance.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    Tbh most fat girls look half decent once they get to around 120lbs or something srs

    You realize a number that low isn't healthy for anybody over about 5 ft 5?

    Seriously.
    I hope women never hear you spew this ignorant tripe.
    Comparing to the BMI,

    lol

    strong logic, just checked and that says healthy for women up to 5'9

    Please keep posting your ignorance.

    At 5'7", my best friend's spine sticks out alramingly at 130 pounds and she looks like you could break her in half she's so skinny. She has a larger frame.
  • BondBomb
    BondBomb Posts: 1,781 Member
    Tbh most fat girls look half decent once they get to around 120lbs or something srs
    This is a totally weird statement. 120lbs at 5'4 on me would mean I would have NO muscle. I suppose if I didn't work out and sat home not eating this would be possible. I would prefer not to develop osteoporosis.
    That said, on someone 5'8 it would be even more extreme. I think you may be just guessing here. And based on the responses not doing such a great job of it.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    Tbh most fat girls look half decent once they get to around 120lbs or something srs
    This is a totally weird statement. 120lbs at 5'4 on me would mean I would have NO muscle. I suppose if I didn't work out and sat home not eating this would be possible. I would prefer not to develop osteoporosis.
    That said, on someone 5'8 it would be even more extreme. I think you may be just guessing here. And based on the responses not doing such a great job of it.
    I can guarantee with absolute certainty that this twerp doesn't know what 120 pounds looks like, anyway. He just picked a number he thinks is appropriate to fit his narrow-minded, undeveloped sense of what a woman should look like.
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    Tbh most fat girls look half decent once they get to around 120lbs or something srs
    This is a totally weird statement. 120lbs at 5'4 on me would mean I would have NO muscle. I suppose if I didn't work out and sat home not eating this would be possible. I would prefer not to develop osteoporosis.
    That said, on someone 5'8 it would be even more extreme. I think you may be just guessing here. And based on the responses not doing such a great job of it.
    I think men actually have ZERO idea of womans weight.
  • DontStopB_Leakin
    DontStopB_Leakin Posts: 3,863 Member
    Tbh most fat girls look half decent once they get to around 120lbs or something srs

    You realize a number that low isn't healthy for anybody over about 5 ft 5?

    Seriously.
    I hope women never hear you spew this ignorant tripe.
    Comparing to the BMI,

    lol

    strong logic, just checked and that says healthy for women up to 5'9
    Because women just stop growing at 5'9, amirite?



    I'm 5'10. Your argument is invalid.
  • Tbh most fat girls look half decent once they get to around 120lbs or something srs
    This is a totally weird statement. 120lbs at 5'4 on me would mean I would have NO muscle. I suppose if I didn't work out and sat home not eating this would be possible. I would prefer not to develop osteoporosis.
    That said, on someone 5'8 it would be even more extreme. I think you may be just guessing here. And based on the responses not doing such a great job of it.

    These are throwing lanky girls at me, and come at me with the God aka BMI which is never right tbh

    Reminds me of when fat girls saying skinny girls are unattractive, No its just you'll never be like that
  • Tbh most fat girls look half decent once they get to around 120lbs or something srs

    You realize a number that low isn't healthy for anybody over about 5 ft 5?

    Seriously.
    I hope women never hear you spew this ignorant tripe.
    Comparing to the BMI,

    lol

    strong logic, just checked and that says healthy for women up to 5'9
    Because women just stop growing at 5'9, amirite?



    I'm 5'10. Your argument is invalid.

    5'10 no thanks
This discussion has been closed.