Guys, be honest,....

bikinibeliever

ive always found that people become more attractive once you get to know them and know their personality

I believe what ^he said. I have been told many times I have a pretty face, and I do believe that. Been overweight forever. I've had guys notice my face for sure, but never come up and ask me out. Yes, there have been some to flirt.

But even though I was always overweight I never had trouble getting a boyfriend (when I was single) because the guys who ended up asking me out were the ones that got to know me. I have been told over and over all my life that I have a fantastic personality.

By the way, I don't feel like my weight makes me who I am. I have many great qualities to offer.

crisanderson27

My coworker told me just last week," girl, you sure are losing that weight. You gonna be something when you drop that weight. You already got a pretty *kitten* face, and to have a body to match, you're husband better watch out."

Really.

Really. She was guilty of being inconsiderate, but not of being wrong. Her opinion is hers to have, and the judgment of right or wrong by comparison, yours. It's relative, not universal.

The inconsiderate part came from implying you're not attractive now, whether you are to her or are not.

AllTehBeers

Fat people are not a fetish.

sorry...it is

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fat_fetishism

I can't agree with this as a blanket statement. My SO loved my body at 300 pounds, just like now at almost 70 pounds lighter. In this aspect, I wouldn't think it's a fetish, so much as acceptance.

crisanderson27

Fat people are not a fetish.

sorry...it is

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fat_fetishism

I can't agree with this as a blanket statement. My SO loved my body at 300 pounds, just like now at almost 70 pounds lighter. In this aspect, I wouldn't think it's a fetish, so much as acceptance.

Agreed, it wasn't a fetish. But acceptance and love of who you are, isn't the same as being 100% attracted to your body on a purely physical level.

There were things about my last girlfriends body that weren't necessarily on my list for 'perfection'...and other things that exceeded what was on that list. None of it mattered in the end though, I loved her just the way she was. However, it was initial physical attraction that brought us together, her personality simply sealed it. These are not things of little consequence. Had either of us been obese (NOT by that stupid BMI chart)...I doubt we'd ever have talked.

Ivey05131980

Very inconsiderate. What she should have said (what she really meant) "you are too fat now that your husband should not have any worries because noone wants you" and "yeah, "you're pretty, but that stops at the neck"

lol...it does not bother me, in a round-about way, she's probably right. It does not bother me, really, just adding that women think alot like men...

bonjour24

wow, this thread has taken a bit of a turn from what the OP was asking! yay for railroading and trolling!

i know this thread was asking the guys, but i can tell you that i've always been on the chubby scale. and i only had problems pulling blokes when i wasn't feeling very confident, but i think that's more about the person i portrayed myself as.

i think that some men (and chicks) like skinny women, some like athletic women, some like italian women, some like pasty white women, some like chubby women, some like oriental women, some like fat women, some like huge women.

i do know that psychological studies have shown that people will choose their potential partner based on how attractive they class themselves (however, there are always people who are looking for something else other than a loving relationship, and people that fit outside societal 'norms'). for example, i would rate myself at about a 6/10 on a hotness scale- i'm not hideous but i'm not going to be gracing the cover of vogue any time soon (that's 6/10 fat or thinner because i don't base my self worth on my weight). when i met my hubby i rated him at about a 5/10, but the more i got to know him the more beautiful he became to me.

i

NormalSaneFLGuy

I like cheese and crackers.

Umeboshi

I like cheese and crackers.

You would be so hot if you would just turn into a pile of cheese and crackers.

Alex_is_Hawks

You never look at an overweight or obese girl and say "damn she's hot. do you?? I've even caught my husband saying how thin women are hot, but never any that are overweight or obese.

this is a trap right? It feels like one...and worse yet, it feels like a trap for your husband....that the men of MFP get to help you spring on him....

see...if the men of MFP say "yes...you are right" then it gives you the tools to go back to your husband and say "you don't find me attractive, I conducted a poll and statistically you just don't." Doesn't seem to matter at all that he fell in love with you or married you...which really he did...

BUT....if the men of MFP by chance say, "I'm sorry but you are wrong, we do find overweight/obese women attractive" then it gives you the ammunition to go back to your husband and say "there are men out there that find overweight/obese women attractive and aren't afraid to admit it, but you never say it, you say thin women are hot".

see? It's a trap...and it's a sad one...because he will NEVER be right, and you will always be hurt...and quite frankly...he married you....

that should be all the answer you need.

jus sayin.

crisanderson27

You never look at an overweight or obese girl and say "damn she's hot. do you?? I've even caught my husband saying how thin women are hot, but never any that are overweight or obese.

this is a trap right? It feels like one...and worse yet, it feels like a trap for your husband....that the men of MFP get to help you spring on him....

see...if the men of MFP say "yes...you are right" then it gives you the tools to go back to your husband and say "you don't find me attractive, I conducted a poll and statistically you just don't." Doesn't seem to matter at all that he fell in love with you or married you...which really he did...

BUT....if the men of MFP by chance say, "I'm sorry but you are wrong, we do find overweight/obese women attractive" then it gives you the ammunition to go back to your husband and say "there are men out there that find overweight/obese women attractive and aren't afraid to admit it, but you never say it, you say thin women are hot".

see? It's a trap...and it's a sad one...because he will NEVER be right, and you will always be hurt...and quite frankly...he married you....

that should be all the answer you need.

jus sayin.

If I didn't love you before Miss Lauren (and I did)...this post would have sealed it.

Alex_is_Hawks

You never look at an overweight or obese girl and say "damn she's hot. do you?? I've even caught my husband saying how thin women are hot, but never any that are overweight or obese.

this is a trap right? It feels like one...and worse yet, it feels like a trap for your husband....that the men of MFP get to help you spring on him....

see...if the men of MFP say "yes...you are right" then it gives you the tools to go back to your husband and say "you don't find me attractive, I conducted a poll and statistically you just don't." Doesn't seem to matter at all that he fell in love with you or married you...which really he did...

BUT....if the men of MFP by chance say, "I'm sorry but you are wrong, we do find overweight/obese women attractive" then it gives you the ammunition to go back to your husband and say "there are men out there that find overweight/obese women attractive and aren't afraid to admit it, but you never say it, you say thin women are hot".

see? It's a trap...and it's a sad one...because he will NEVER be right, and you will always be hurt...and quite frankly...he married you....

that should be all the answer you need.

jus sayin.

If I didn't love you before Miss Lauren (and I did)...this post would have sealed it.

awww thanks Cris...love you too!

llaurenmarie

You never look at an overweight or obese girl and say "damn she's hot. do you?? I've even caught my husband saying how thin women are hot, but never any that are overweight or obese.

this is a trap right? It feels like one...and worse yet, it feels like a trap for your husband....that the men of MFP get to help you spring on him....

see...if the men of MFP say "yes...you are right" then it gives you the tools to go back to your husband and say "you don't find me attractive, I conducted a poll and statistically you just don't." Doesn't seem to matter at all that he fell in love with you or married you...which really he did...

BUT....if the men of MFP by chance say, "I'm sorry but you are wrong, we do find overweight/obese women attractive" then it gives you the ammunition to go back to your husband and say "there are men out there that find overweight/obese women attractive and aren't afraid to admit it, but you never say it, you say thin women are hot".

see? It's a trap...and it's a sad one...because he will NEVER be right, and you will always be hurt...and quite frankly...he married you....

that should be all the answer you need.

jus sayin.

DavPul

@Umeboshi, what is your purpose in this thread? Are you trying to educate or merely crush all over it? I honestly cant figure out what you're driving at.

Possible to sum up all of your negativity in this thread into a two or three sentence mission statement? What is it you're trying to get across to us? Because right now it seems like you're saying we're all wrong for liking whatever it is we like, and I hope that's not what your point is

Natashaa1991

I'm sorry to be brutally honest, but it's just like that.
Boys are dumb.

pixiestick

this is a trap right? It feels like one...and worse yet, it feels like a trap for your husband....that the men of MFP get to help you spring on him....

see...if the men of MFP say "yes...you are right" then it gives you the tools to go back to your husband and say "you don't find me attractive, I conducted a poll and statistically you just don't." Doesn't seem to matter at all that he fell in love with you or married you...which really he did...

BUT....if the men of MFP by chance say, "I'm sorry but you are wrong, we do find overweight/obese women attractive" then it gives you the ammunition to go back to your husband and say "there are men out there that find overweight/obese women attractive and aren't afraid to admit it, but you never say it, you say thin women are hot".

see? It's a trap...and it's a sad one...because he will NEVER be right, and you will always be hurt...and quite frankly...he married you....

that should be all the answer you need.

jus sayin.

Nicely stated, Alex_is_hawks. Could not agree more.

magj0y

people are hard wired to be attracted to people with a healthy weight, it's just how it is.

To hold it against someone is kind of harsh.

llaurenmarie

Boys are dumb.

Boys may be dumb, men on the other hand... vary.

Txglitter

I hate the word obese, but from a woman's point of view I think my husband is attractive and is considered obese according to weight charts. He is 6'6 and 380lbs. I think he is wonderful inside and out. The only reason I ever give his weight a second thought is health reasons. Even with that said I know first hand you cant lose weight because someone nags you, so I support him when he wants to "diet" but his weight just usually isn't something I think about.

detego

.

VanessaHeartsMasr

Frankly, I think if you're attracted to men or women of a larger (obese or otherwise) weight, you're attracted moreso to the comfort level because you're fat too, because it's less threatening.

Completely disagree with this. My husband is 6'2" and in pretty damn good shape. He prefers big women because he finds them more physically attractive. Has nothing to do with comfort level.