Sexual Orientation Changed Through Reparative Therapy?

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  • MFPBrandy
    MFPBrandy Posts: 564 Member
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    "Therapy" suggests a malfunction, something that needs corrected.

    Sexual orientation does not need to be corrected. Anything claiming it can do so is just a shaming tactic designed to shove obvious behaviors under the rug.
    Agreed. And "Tolerant" also suggests the behavior is somehow wrong, but you'll put up with it.

    Love is love. As long as it's between consenting adults, with no abuses of power or deception, I'm happy.
  • RobKarmic
    RobKarmic Posts: 108 Member
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    Hmm, sounds like a load of bull to me the fact that they call it reparative implies they are fixing something and while being homosexual can be considered a birth defect that doesn't mean it needs to be changed if it's not harming their life I suppose if someone doesn't want to be a homosexual then they can try it

    I believe the suicide rates for people who enter this type of therapy is through the roof and those who don't try to kill themselves almost always fail this type of therapy
  • MFPBrandy
    MFPBrandy Posts: 564 Member
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    Well a lesbian girlfriend of mine told me she absolutely chose to be with women only because she'd been abused by several men in her childhood and said she would never trust a man nor would she ever want to be naked with one. I'm not saying that's everyone's experience, but it is hers.
    I think, like with so many things, it depends on the person. There are situations like the above, where trauma may play a role. So many people refuse to label themselves as bi-sexual, because they're attacked by "real" lesbians and gays as "only playing around." So they pick men or women and stick with it. And if they change, then they've finally "come out" as gay or lesbian, when really it's just a different person they've fallen in love with. Or if the next person they fall in love with is the opposite gender, it's "I knew they were only playing around!"
    Personally, I wish I COULD decide for myself. I have a hard enough time finding a man I want to share my life with; widening the scope to include women would at least up my odds.
  • johloz
    johloz Posts: 176 Member
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    I think, like with so many things, it depends on the person. There are situations like the above, where trauma may play a role. So many people refuse to label themselves as bi-sexual, because they're attacked by "real" lesbians and gays as "only playing around." So they pick men or women and stick with it. And if they change, then they've finally "come out" as gay or lesbian, when really it's just a different person they've fallen in love with. Or if the next person they fall in love with is the opposite gender, it's "I knew they were only playing around!"
    Personally, I wish I COULD decide for myself. I have a hard enough time finding a man I want to share my life with; widening the scope to include women would at least up my odds.

    I agree. My husband argues with me all the time -- he thinks people choose to be gay. I tell him that, if it is a choice, then he is able to choose to be gay if he wants. He says he couldn't choose to be gay -- he's only attracted to women, thereby proving my point. I can choose to have sex with someone of either gender, but I can't choose who I WANT to have sex with. I personally know people who are exclusively sexually attracted to the same gender, but due to religious beliefs have decided to be in heterosexual relationships, some even have children. Whether your sexual orientation is determined at birth or throughout the course of your development, I couldn't say, but I know it is not your choice.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
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    "so-called reparative therapy"

    It's called brainwashing. It doesn't change a person's sexual preference. It just represses that person and put them back in the closet.
  • louised88
    louised88 Posts: 159
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    I used to believe it was a choice but now believe that there are factors that lead to it.. while im against the lifestyle I am tolerant and accepting of those who live that way.. the biggest problem I have with these therapies is that it can lead to a lot of pressure for people to change and they may act differently but not really be changed

    Yup. Those straight people and their weird lifestyle choice. I really can't understand how they live that way either. I'm tolerant of them because some of my best friends are straight, and they seem like nice enough folks. Still. I pity them because they were obviously influenced by the straight culture that surrounds them.

    I <3 this. I wish they wouldn't shove their straightness in my face though, can't they just keep that stuff for when they're alone?
  • BoatReadyBody
    BoatReadyBody Posts: 376
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    As I was writting my comment I decided it best to not express what I was going to say.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
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    Here is what I know for sure regarding "Born Gay vs Environment Cause".

    My parents had 3 sons and 2 daughters. We grew up in the same house, went to the same schools. Were treated the same way. My brother was gay. Always. In a time when it wasn't politically correct to "come out". He didn't believe it was a choice and neither do I. He told me once that if it was a choice, he wouldn't have chosen to be gay, because of all the cr*p he had to put up with from others.

    He dies of Aids 19 years ago. He was 33.
  • Dave198lbs
    Dave198lbs Posts: 8,810 Member
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    As I was writting my comment I decided it best to not express what I was going to say.

    well...you have a nice tummy...so thanks for stopping by
  • Rachlmale
    Rachlmale Posts: 640 Member
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    It shouldn't be an issue... some people like men, some people like women. End of.
  • Juliejustsaying
    Juliejustsaying Posts: 2,332 Member
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    "Therapy" suggests a malfunction, something that needs corrected.

    Sexual orientation does not need to be corrected. Anything claiming it can do so is just a shaming tactic designed to shove obvious behaviors under the rug.

    THIS!!
  • Illona88
    Illona88 Posts: 903 Member
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    You can't change who you are attracted to or fall in love with.

    I suppose this therapy will make you think you've changed or will necessitate you to pretend you have, but I doubt you actually will have.


    Also, don't fix what ain't broken.
  • ndfaninaz
    ndfaninaz Posts: 65
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    I haven't read through all the responses, so I'm just going to add my thoughts to the existing 5 pages.

    Being gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgender is not a lifestyle. I HATE when people say that. And I do not use the word hate very often. Being LGBTQ is just PART of who a person IS. It's not a choice. When did YOU *choose* to be straight? When did you chose to have brown/blue/green eyes? When did you choose your skin color?

    There is no need for therapy because there is nothing to fix. This type of "therapy" is not only a sham, it's dangerous. It's also religiously motivated, but that's another topic. The only thing reparative therapy does is instill shame upon a person for being who they are.

    There are few things I am truly passionate about, and being an ally to the LGBTQ community is at the top of the list. I see lots of topics on these message boards that I disagree with, but I keep my mouth shut because I don't like to make waves. But this is not one of those topics. I will not remain silent on this one.

    And not that it matters, but I am straight. And I don't remember having a choice in the matter. It's just part of who I am.
  • ruthiejewell
    ruthiejewell Posts: 134 Member
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    The only people in need of "repair" are those who judge, those who are obsessed with the assumed sexual practices of some groups and those who make some people feel they are wrong, evil, confused, less natural. And why just gay people? Why do they not try to "repair" asexual people or straight married people who don't practice "acceptable" sexual behaviour only?? Often the reason for the need to "repair" homosexuals is biblically based yet those people are not out stoning to death those who are unfaithful or banning/annulling marriage between non virgins. Why the obsession with gay people and more so men????
  • ruthiejewell
    ruthiejewell Posts: 134 Member
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    Totally and passionately agree!!!
  • Dave198lbs
    Dave198lbs Posts: 8,810 Member
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    But why on god's green earth do some gays (sorry but it seems gays do it more than straights) have to constantly announce their sexual orientation.

    can you imagine if straight people suddenly started announcing they are straight as often as gays have to announce their choice?

    and the flamboyant gays. They seem to be flaunting for the sole purpose of flaunting. it's tiring. stop it.

    I am so f'ing sick of people arguing that any acknolwedgment of one's own sexuality, if not straight, is somehow flaunting it or a sign of aggression.

    I am CONSTANTLY bombarded by heterosexist messaging - public displays of affection, advertising, innuendo, oversexualization of women, false beliefs about the composition of my own family. Do you think I can find accurate representations of my family in the media? No - only trite over the top exaggerations of stereotypes under the auspices of "progressive television". And YET, there is a real and constant fear among many LGBT people, myself included, for living an open lifestyle. I've been married for 5 years, have two kids, and I don't feel safe holidng hands with my partner. But, apparently, if I do, some dip-s#it thinks I'm flaunting it.

    I really do feel like I'm tolerant of straight people, because most of the time, I want to scream about the crap I have to put up with from you people.

    wow...

    when I said "flaunting it" I was referring to the guys who wear extravagant make up...sashay when they walk...that is flaunting. holding hands etc is not what I meant

    as far as the media...bombardment...they go with the majority...but...there is more and more openly gay television now...many shows, etc. that's fine. and good...I guess I should have been more clear about what "flaunting" means to me
  • kaylaandthestarcatcher
    kaylaandthestarcatcher Posts: 836
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    It's weird to me that this is a thing that is still being talked about and debated. Not only is it silly, but I don't see why it matters. Some people like men, some people like women, some people like all genders. Why should somebody's sexual preference matter to anybody but that person?



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  • cindaroses
    cindaroses Posts: 117
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    I do not believe that you are born homosexual. There are some who may want therapy because they feel like they are not doing something they should. If a person wants therapy...let them get it. BTW I am not a hater, and do not go around saying malicious things about anyone.

    If you believe in the Bible and God, you can't refute this verse:

    1 Corinthians 6:9

    Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God.
  • DanaDark
    DanaDark Posts: 2,187 Member
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    I personally think that people are born one way or another.

    From there, I think that their environment may also play a roll, but not nearly as significant as genetics.

    Overall, I think people simply like certain features, and get used to and accustomed to the sexual orientation that would allow them more access to those features.

    An example, if a man happens to find broad shoulders and excessive body hair attractive, he is far more likely to be attracted to a man than a woman. That is putting it simply, as our attractions have hundreds of variables.

    In the end, there is almost 7 billion people in the world. Perhaps we could use a few extra gays around to slow things down? lol.
  • kaylaandthestarcatcher
    kaylaandthestarcatcher Posts: 836
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    when I said "flaunting it" I was referring to the guys who wear extravagant make up...sashay when they walk...that is flaunting. holding hands etc is not what I meant

    Maybe they do that because they want to. Because they like to do that. Because they don't live their lives to please ignorant people who would like to deny them their right to do whatever they please when it's not hurting a single person.

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