Where to find Girlfriend

neverstray

I love being single. However, there are times when it's nice to have someone to hang out with, and do things with. Not 24/7, but just sometimes. Single really is the way to go for me. However, as I said earlier, I wouldn't mind someone being part of my life, but I don't want to be defined by my relationship, as so often happens. One of my pet peeves is when I show up somewhere, and the first thing people say to me is, "where's so-and-so tonight"? That just sets me off. What am I? Chopped liver? Anyway, usually, I respond with, "I have no idea", or, "I'm here and that's all that matters".

anemoneprose

I've been single for 2+ years And it's been pretty good

I'm coming up to 2 years flying solo and I have to say I like it too although it does have its moments

I flipping love being single. Sooooooooo much easier.

Isn't it just !!

Holy **** yes. No bull****, no compromises - I can listen to/watch/eat/do/see what and who I want *in a perfect state of calm*. Only as much cleaning up as I want to bother with (and just my own mess). No arguments. (Holy ****. I remember travelling on my own again just after the breakup. A total revelation. Who's got the tickets? I do. Who's freaking out because they didn't plan well and taking it out on me? No one. Who's boarding with time to get a coffee and a paper? Me.) No frustration/not being understood/jealousy/suspicion, and if I'm bored, it's my own damn fault. Love. It.

Its the way forward. I love not having to answer to anyone and most of all not having to bail a dimwit out of debt every month because he spent his money. I can wear what I want, tattoo/pierce where I want and not give a rats *kitten* who cares :drinker:

Chin frigging chin! :drinker:

anemoneprose

I love being single. However, there are times when it's nice to have someone to hang out with, and do things with. Not 24/7, but just sometimes. Single really is the way to go for me. However, as I said earlier, I wouldn't mind someone being part of my life, but I don't want to be defined by my relationship, as so often happens. One of my pet peeves is when I show up somewhere, and the first thing people say to me is, "where's so-and-so tonight"? That just sets me off. What am I? Chopped liver? Anyway, usually, I respond with, "I have no idea", or, "I'm here and that's all that matters".

I think that's just a thing people say, and maybe not so much a comment on your value. Or maybe they like so-and-so. Or maybe I'm not getting the context, idk. It's in the same category as 'what do you do'? Obviously we're all a lot more complex than our professional identities (or lack thereof), but people don't want to think too much, and like having little hooks to hang their conceptual hats on. Not personal, I don't think.

Wrt occasional companionship - totally possible if you look in the right places. I'm sure there's someone out there who wants the same things, in the same way. I can think of three relationships off the top of my head falling under your earlier description (can't say for sure, but probably minus the 'open relationship' bit, but there are people up for that too). All are made up of professional people who've been divorced.

neverstray

I love being single. However, there are times when it's nice to have someone to hang out with, and do things with. Not 24/7, but just sometimes. Single really is the way to go for me. However, as I said earlier, I wouldn't mind someone being part of my life, but I don't want to be defined by my relationship, as so often happens. One of my pet peeves is when I show up somewhere, and the first thing people say to me is, "where's so-and-so tonight"? That just sets me off. What am I? Chopped liver? Anyway, usually, I respond with, "I have no idea", or, "I'm here and that's all that matters".

I think that's just a thing people say, and maybe not so much a comment on your value. Or maybe they like so-and-so. Or maybe I'm not getting the context, idk. It's in the same category as 'what do you do'? Obviously we're all a lot more complex than our professional identities (or lack thereof), but people don't want to think too much, and like having little hooks to hang their conceptual hats on. Not personal, I don't think.

Wrt occasional companionship - totally possible if you look in the right places. I'm sure there's someone out there who wants the same things, in the same way. I can think of three relationships off the top of my head falling under your earlier description (can't say for sure, but probably minus the 'open relationship' bit, but there are people up for that too). All are made up of professional people who've been divorced.

"what do you do" is another one. If I don't think I'll ever see this person again, I lie very time. It's quite fun. I'll say I'm a plumber or a doctor, or a pro ping pong player. Whatever, it's such a stupid question, and it's fun to have fun with it.

deksgrl

I have tatts, but red hair and blue eyes. Will soon have an awesome job and career and will only need a man when I feel like a hug

Uhm, he's likely going to want more than a hug, dear.

davd422

Holy Hell! I didn't think this thread would get this amount of responses. So everything from inmates to getting your parents to hook you up. At least I got a chuckle from some of these responses. I appreciate everyones input.

It seems that half of the women said they would like for someone to approach them in public assuming its not creepy and the other half, well I guess would not take a liking to that kind of meeting. I wonder what that difference means in those womens overall personality?

likearadiowave

Ok why am I having trouble finding a girlfriend. I'm an attractive 31 year old male. Where is the best place to meet a good women???? Have not had too much luck with online and don't want to go boozing at the bars every night.

Try the internets.

GoatBoat66

Internet dating is so much better than hoping for potluck at a bar.

Hearts_2015

Holy Hell! I didn't think this thread would get this amount of responses. So everything from inmates to getting your parents to hook you up. At least I got a chuckle from some of these responses. I appreciate everyones input.

It seems that half of the women said they would like for someone to approach them in public assuming its not creepy and the other half, well I guess would not take a liking to that kind of meeting. I wonder what that difference means in those womens overall personality?

Regarding it being the women's personality? I think it has far more to with the creepiness factor of the guy doing the 'hey you're attractive' in the grocery store after only a hello.

Sorry but that's just weird, creeper..... it's too forward after only saying hello! In a bar situation maybe but the grocery store ppl pop in to shop and may smile and say hello and move on. Now seeing the person again in the store at a later time.. you could come up with a goofy line like, 'come here often' and then you'd both laugh and that'd break the ice.

So you walk up to a stranger in a grocery store and say hi, I think you're attractive... what's bf or hubby thinking if he's behind you?

Picture you being with your gf (make up one real quick in your imagination!:laugh:) and some guys comes up to her and say, I find you attractive.

Would that make you feel awkward or not so much? I think that's what it comes down to, when we put ourselves in another's shoes we can sometimes see how it might feel.

Clear as mud, sorry, I'm tired and hope something up there makes sense.

But of this whole thread, you've gotten a lot of attention (I don't mean that in a bad way at ALL!) so hopefully that's boosting your confidence!!:drinker:

Some mentioned church 'stuff'... I don't attend a particular church but I do play volleyball and others sports and various activities with a bunch of ppl that get together for singles nights. Some go to a particular church some don't, we might go to the bar and play pool, etc. So not all churches are sticks in the mud, lots of fun and good friendships can be made.

Cheers for you finding what you're looking for in life!:flowerforyou:

deksgrl

Holy Hell! I didn't think this thread would get this amount of responses. So everything from inmates to getting your parents to hook you up. At least I got a chuckle from some of these responses. I appreciate everyones input.

It seems that half of the women said they would like for someone to approach them in public assuming its not creepy and the other half, well I guess would not take a liking to that kind of meeting. I wonder what that difference means in those womens overall personality?

I don't think it is personality. It is about comfort level. If I am introduced to someone by a friend, we have mutual friends in common, that feels less threatening than some random stranger telling me they find me attractive. If I meet someone in a group setting, bowling, hiking, book club, whatever, that is more comfortable because I know we have friends and people in common. If I see someone several times because we both happen to do our grocery shopping on Thursday evening, then there is some sense of familiarity because I would think you live nearby. Striking up a conversation would be okay. But, total stranger, never seen you before, there is a level of concern with that, and any possibility of creepy is going to send a bad vibe.

Charloo1990

Been single for 1 and 1/2 years and it's starting to suck

Any wonder with your approach... "are you open to anything?", urm sleazy much? ... Just saying. (for anyone wondering what i'm on about, he knows)

Topsking2010

Everything starts with Hello. A man should have enough confidence to approach a woman in a respectful manner.

Don't look for a girlfriend, instead focus on meeting quality women outside of the local bar.

AntWrig

Everything starts with Hello. A man should have enough confidence to approach a woman in a respectful manner.

Don't look for a girlfriend, instead focus on meeting quality women outside of the local bar.

Agreed!

sarahg148

Holy Hell! I didn't think this thread would get this amount of responses. So everything from inmates to getting your parents to hook you up. At least I got a chuckle from some of these responses. I appreciate everyones input.

It seems that half of the women said they would like for someone to approach them in public assuming its not creepy and the other half, well I guess would not take a liking to that kind of meeting. I wonder what that difference means in those womens overall personality?

I don't think it is personality. It is about comfort level. If I am introduced to someone by a friend, we have mutual friends in common, that feels less threatening than some random stranger telling me they find me attractive. If I meet someone in a group setting, bowling, hiking, book club, whatever, that is more comfortable because I know we have friends and people in common. If I see someone several times because we both happen to do our grocery shopping on Thursday evening, then there is some sense of familiarity because I would think you live nearby. Striking up a conversation would be okay. But, total stranger, never seen you before, there is a level of concern with that, and any possibility of creepy is going to send a bad vibe.

Agree

ihateroses

You sound terrible.

Give up.

neverstray

Creepy is such an interesting thing.

It's only creepy to her when she has no interest. Otherwise, it's not. Lol. So, not being creepy is difficult because it's not controlled by the guy but more about he perception of the woman. I caveat this by saying, most of the time. Lol. There are just plain creepy guys. But, even guys are creeped by those guys. Lol

deksgrl

Creepy is such an interesting thing.

It's only creepy to her when she has no interest. Otherwise, it's not. Lol. So, not being creepy is difficult because it's not controlled by the guy but more about he perception of the woman. I caveat this by saying, most of the time. Lol. There are just plain creepy guys. But, even guys are creeped by those guys. Lol

Well, yes and no. Even if the guy is really good looking and I could potentially be interested, here are some things that would go through my mind if approached by a total stranger in the grocery store, including but not limited to:

-is this a joke? Where are the cameras?
-is he a serial killer?
-is he a perv?
-is he desperate?
-is he married / attached? If not, why not?

All this on top of trying to interpret his tone/attitude, just too many questions. All of these questions usually already answered if you have friends in common or already know each other from meeting in a group.

shaynak112

Friends of friends. Bars and clubs. Bookstores, libraries, coffee shops, grocery stores.

waronmyfat

try the supermarket... lol .. honestly it will happen when its meant to be... no point in rushing it and pushing the issue .. just go with the flow and stop looking and it then usually happens

neverstray

Creepy is such an interesting thing.

It's only creepy to her when she has no interest. Otherwise, it's not. Lol. So, not being creepy is difficult because it's not controlled by the guy but more about he perception of the woman. I caveat this by saying, most of the time. Lol. There are just plain creepy guys. But, even guys are creeped by those guys. Lol

Well, yes and no. Even if the guy is really good looking and I could potentially be interested, here are some things that would go through my mind if approached by a total stranger in the grocery store, including but not limited to:

-is this a joke? Where are the cameras?
-is he a serial killer?
-is he a perv?
-is he desperate?
-is he married / attached? If not, why not?

All this on top of trying to interpret his tone/attitude, just too many questions. All of these questions usually already answered if you have friends in common or already know each other from meeting in a group.

Funny. Guys are just like...

-is she hot?
If yes, say hi, smile and be witty.
If no, keep moving.

No thoughts of her being crazy enter the mind. That happens AFTER he nails her. Lol.