Major Blow to My Confidence Today-Rude People
Replies
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That's awful, I'm sorry to hear someone said that to you!!
If I was you, I'd complain to the manager. It'd make that girl think twice about not thinking before she opens her mouth in future. To say it is one thing, to say the 3 month bit is even worse!0 -
Whenever someone is saying something nasty to me I will say 1 of 2 things either "what?" cuz I am always surprised that people are willing to say rotten crap twice. Or I say "you have a booger" true or not it usually shuts them up.0
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"When someone hurts your feelings punch them in the face. Seriously, punch them in the face and go get some ice cream."
-Unknown author0 -
That happened to me at work before, twice actually. It feels like sh** when people say stuff like that! The nerve of people to be so rude. The positive behind that is, it gives you more strength to do even better! You can do it and so can't I. The first time someone asked me that, I almost cried right there, but the second time it happened, I laughed and told the woman she was very rude and should keep her thoughts to herself! Her look back was priceless and helps me keep my confidence strong! When people are rude, give it back to them! They will feel ashamed and get some decency to keep thier mouth's shut next time
I live by the saying "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all!" Although, when people are shooting down someone's self asteem and confidence, that's my time to give it back! haha0 -
Thanks for all of the support guys! I forgot to add this to my original post, but I responded by saying that I wasn't pregnant, but fat. She kept on going though. I will use this for motivation. She will be chomping more on her words next time she sees me!0
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Your profile doesn't say what country you are in.
What you do - if it ever happens again - depends on how wicked you feel and how likely you are to see tham again.
If they know you then you are a little limited but can get away with, "Now you of all people should know better than that" - very loudly.
otherwise, thespian skills to the fore, crestfallen expression and sobbing voice - "Sadly, I am not now".
You have not lied, but you may have - just a little - tacitly suggested that you MIGHT have been. I defy anyone to continue the conversation in the face of an apparent miscarriage.
Alternatively, just get your husband to say, "Before you ask when the baby is due, be very, very sure....." - and leave the sentence unfinished. It carries more sting if you leave them to work it out. If they can't and do actually ask then tell them to think about it and leave...!
You could take your cue from a story attributed to Sir WInston Churchill who, when accused by a female MP of being drunk in parliament replied, "Madam, you are ugly - in the morning I shall be sober".
Pick on some physical attribute of the other person and let rip, if you dare!
I carry nearly all my girth on my waistband - it is annoying that my arms and legs are getting spindlier but I assure my gut that its days are numbered every morning when I poke it - and turn a deaf ear to its reply that it has been over 60 years and counting so far.
I am Welsh - sarcasm is an art-form0 -
I would have asked ARE YOU? That usually shuts people up;.0
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Your profile doesn't say what country you are in.
What you do - if it ever happens again - depends on how wicked you feel and how likely you are to see tham again.
If they know you then you are a little limited but can get away with, "Now you of all people should know better than that" - very loudly.
otherwise, thespian skills to the fore, crestfallen expression and sobbing voice - "Sadly, I am not now".
You have not lied, but you may have - just a little - tacitly suggested that you MIGHT have been. I defy anyone to continue the conversation in the face of an apparent miscarriage.
Alternatively, just get your husband to say, "Before you ask when the baby is due, be very, very sure....." - and leave the sentence unfinished. It carries more sting if you leave them to work it out. If they can't and do actually ask then tell them to think about it and leave...!
You could take your cue from a story attributed to Sir WInston Churchill who, when accused by a female MP of being drunk in parliament replied, "Madam, you are ugly - in the morning I shall be sober".
Pick on some physical attribute of the other person and let rip, if you dare!
I carry nearly all my girth on my waistband - it is annoying that my arms and legs are getting spindlier but I assure my gut that its days are numbered every morning when I poke it - and turn a deaf ear to its reply that it has been over 60 years and counting so far.
I am Welsh - sarcasm is an art-form
LOL! I like those! I am an American and Welsh humor is always appreciated!0 -
The same thing happened to me on Thanksgiving, only it came from a relative:
A (least favorite) relative I haven't seen in over 20 years asked if I was pregnant. To add insult to injury, she hands me a plate of salad and says, "Eat this, it won't make you fat. I'm proof of it, I eat it everyday." The statement itself, didn't bother me, as I am well aware that I carry ALL my extra weight around my mid-section. For what it's worth: I am 5'3" and weigh 129.8. What did bother me, however, was the fact that the statement came from someone who was hit with an ugly stick at birth. The troll was hardly skinny herself, and had back-rolls to boot. It took every ounce of restraint in me to not commit murder that day, so instead, I went for a 12 mile walk to simmer down.
The beauty of what happened is that I have the ability to fix my fat issues through diet and exercise. She, on the other hand, will never be able to fix how ugly she is, inside AND out.0 -
I would never ask someone if they were pregnant. It's so rude. You should be proud of yourself for working hard to lose weight. Screw that lady! You'll be sexier and fitter than her in no time! Take that hurt and turn it into energy
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I wish people would learn that it is just not a good idea to comment on someone's body. It's none of your business and it's rude. It may also get you injured, because I swear if one more person asks me that... :devil:0
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I had this happen to me in a nail salon after I had already lost 30 pounds, so you can imagine I felt awesome. Plus if I was pregnant I'd never be in a nail salon, exposing my unborn to the acrylic particles and acetone vapors. I felt a little less crappy since the poor woman that asked was SO embarrassed.0
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"Are you pregnant?"
"That depends? Are you interested in a frontal lobotomy?"
Or even better
"No, I'm just shop lifting."0 -
I was at the grocery store with my husband today and we had just finished checking out and were putting the last of our bags into the cart. There was woman that was checking out after us and she had the gall to ask me if I was pregnant. I tell her that I am not pregnant and give her the most evil look ever. She goes "I am so sorry. Do you have any kids now?" I keep telling her "No I don't". At this point, I am fighting the tears. Then she goes "I am so sorry. If this makes you feel any better, you only look 3 mos. pregnant." I give her another evil look and ran out of the store. On top of feeling humiliated and angry, it makes me want to lose weight even more. I carry more of the weight in my belly so I guess I will be ramping up my workout routine to work off the gut. It is a shame how little people care anymore
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Like you, I get comments like that because I carry my weight or my overweight in my stomach so some people have asked me if I am pregnant or asked "when are you due"? When I said "I am not pregnant" One dumbell had the gull to say "you are fat enough be pregnant". I looked at her and smiled to be polite, but I wanted to slam her against a wall. Some people have such gull!! But, I know the humiliation only too well. That and other fat comments can make us lose our confidence, but I won't let it stop me. Now, I just see it as others making stupid comments and being ignorant. We are taking action and doing something about our weight loss. Be glad. I know I am.
You should have told them they looked like they had the IQ to be stupid.0 -
Your profile doesn't say what country you are in.
What you do - if it ever happens again - depends on how wicked you feel and how likely you are to see tham again.
If they know you then you are a little limited but can get away with, "Now you of all people should know better than that" - very loudly.
otherwise, thespian skills to the fore, crestfallen expression and sobbing voice - "Sadly, I am not now".
You have not lied, but you may have - just a little - tacitly suggested that you MIGHT have been. I defy anyone to continue the conversation in the face of an apparent miscarriage.
Alternatively, just get your husband to say, "Before you ask when the baby is due, be very, very sure....." - and leave the sentence unfinished. It carries more sting if you leave them to work it out. If they can't and do actually ask then tell them to think about it and leave...!
You could take your cue from a story attributed to Sir WInston Churchill who, when accused by a female MP of being drunk in parliament replied, "Madam, you are ugly - in the morning I shall be sober".
Pick on some physical attribute of the other person and let rip, if you dare!
I carry nearly all my girth on my waistband - it is annoying that my arms and legs are getting spindlier but I assure my gut that its days are numbered every morning when I poke it - and turn a deaf ear to its reply that it has been over 60 years and counting so far.
I am Welsh - sarcasm is an art-form
You win today, sir.0 -
It's all water off a duck's back babe. You can fix your problem; she will always remain clueless. LOL
A cool response would have been: "Well, I wanted to tell you but your husband said it would be best for him to....."
Oh snap..lmao
^^^THIS!0 -
My friend's father in law asked if she was pregnant at Thanksgiving. She took it in stride, but I would have been crying inside.0
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She could have at least apologised when she offended you the first time and not dig it in deeper. Aw. I'm sorry you had to go through that. Well, I have been insulted many times about my weight for the past few years since I gained a truck ton and the rude comments on a newspaper article I appeared in this August was the last straw.
I have lost weight since then, I used that anger as motivation. Now I just focus on me hehe. Maybe next year when you see that lady again, you can ask her if she has gained some weight :P hehe. 0 -
So rude and insensitive. I'm sorry that happened to you. Just goes to show that certain people have no filters. You continue on your journey and hold your head high despite it all 0
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If it makes you feel better, I'm sure she felt worse than you did.
Ugh - sorry that happened.
This.
Sometimes the most simple of comments can be said and hurt someone elses feelings....but the person saying them may not have meant it in any rude way.0 -
Your profile doesn't say what country you are in.
What you do - if it ever happens again - depends on how wicked you feel and how likely you are to see tham again.
If they know you then you are a little limited but can get away with, "Now you of all people should know better than that" - very loudly.
otherwise, thespian skills to the fore, crestfallen expression and sobbing voice - "Sadly, I am not now".
You have not lied, but you may have - just a little - tacitly suggested that you MIGHT have been. I defy anyone to continue the conversation in the face of an apparent miscarriage.
Alternatively, just get your husband to say, "Before you ask when the baby is due, be very, very sure....." - and leave the sentence unfinished. It carries more sting if you leave them to work it out. If they can't and do actually ask then tell them to think about it and leave...!
You could take your cue from a story attributed to Sir WInston Churchill who, when accused by a female MP of being drunk in parliament replied, "Madam, you are ugly - in the morning I shall be sober".
Pick on some physical attribute of the other person and let rip, if you dare!
I carry nearly all my girth on my waistband - it is annoying that my arms and legs are getting spindlier but I assure my gut that its days are numbered every morning when I poke it - and turn a deaf ear to its reply that it has been over 60 years and counting so far.
I am Welsh - sarcasm is an art-form
LOL! I like those! I am an American and Welsh humor is always appreciated!
My SIL likes to respond to offensive or overly personal questions by saying "i don't want to talk about it" . She says people automatically assume the worst and stop talking.0 -
You just reminded me of a horrendous thing that happened to me. Back in my young free and single days I took a guy home after a night out, won't go into too much detail, suffice to say , at a pivotal moment, he asked 'have you ever been pregnant'
Considering I was about 20 at the time, I can't imagine how my physical condition would have prompted this. Shocking!0 -
I agree. I absolutely agree it hurts. For some reason, though, people believe that pregnant women are community property. If you've ever been pregnant, then you know that total strangers think it's perfectly okay to ask you intimate details about your pregnancy and share theirs! Have you noticed how often people want to touch your belly? My husband once did this to a friend of ours (who was pregnant) and I was mortified! I asked him later if he thought it would be okay to touch her belly if she wasn't pregnant. Of course not! My point is that people are drawn to babies and pregnancy. It makes them forget manners and decorum. Consider that the woman stuck her foot in her mouth and then could not figure out how to extract it. She definitely should have apologized and left it at that but she was trying so hard to smooth over what couldn't be smoothed.
So...you're doing the right thing. Take that as fuel for your personal motivation and keep on keeping on! Don't waste any energy on anger at that woman. She was thoughtless, not evil. And I'm sure she won't ever make that mistake again.0 -
That was terribly rude. I'm sorry she spoke to you that way.0
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In one ear, out the other. Don't let anyone steal your joy Doll!!0
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I will never, ever understand why some people think it's perfectly acceptable to ask a woman if she is pregnant. Besides the obvious error of someone simply being overweight, what if that person is trying to conceive and having issues? What if they just lost a baby? There are so many cans of worms in that question - I never, ever bring it up.
Exactly this.0 -
That is the craziest thing I have ever heard! I am so sorry for you that you had to go through such an awful experience...what a b#&*$%!!0
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what a #$^!#$^#$^!#$ woman! I am SURE that she has mental issues! one time a woman that was bigger than me asked me if i was pregnant! u stay strong, do waht u r doing and PROVE her wrong! how inconsiderate!0
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People are very insensitive... I witnessed this a lot when I was a teenager and working at a local grocery store... I was thin and young then (sigh)... My coworder had just had a baby about 3 months ago but still had a significant belly... Lots of our customers had gotten used to seeing her pregnant and they would ask her over and over when she is going to have that baby... She would be embarrassed and have to tell them she did 3 months ago... Most of the time it was older women.. I felt very bad for her..0
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One thing I learned early, never comment on a woman being pregnant unless you're sure and never comment on a woman's hair, clothes, or anything else.
Even if you say something like, "your hair looks nice today", it gets turned around to "does that mean it didn't look nice before"
PS - Lady in line was a jerk. She was a jerk yesterday and she'll be a jerk tomorrow. Don't sweat it.0
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