Children throwing tantrums in stores! What??
RubyRed8067
Posts: 301
in Chit-Chat
I was in Michaels yesterday and this father and son were shopping. I guess his kid (who looked around 3 or 4) wanted something, but dad wouldn't get it for him. This kid started pitching a fit in the store, crying...screaming (the usual tantrum). We got to listen to that for 45 minutes. We also had the joy of being in front of this kid and his dad in line to check out (more high pitched screaming and crying). The dad is trying to console this kid...but it doesn't stop him. When they got outside, the kid lays down on the sidewalk and basically starts thrashing and screaming and crying. Meanwhile, the dad is PLEADING with his 4 yr old to stop. WTH?? Why is a grown man trying to conjole this spoiled little brat? WHY do parents do this?
To any of you older people, what would your parents have done? I have one very distinct memory of pitching a fit for some doll. My parents took me out to the car and I got spanked there. Once we got home, I got the leather belt. I remember this spanking the most b/c the welp marks bled.... I'm so tired of this lack of discipline in kids. I have come across some of the rudest little twerps EVER, and am so happy I don't have any of my own. I know for a fact my temper would get the best of me if I had one.
rant over.
To any of you older people, what would your parents have done? I have one very distinct memory of pitching a fit for some doll. My parents took me out to the car and I got spanked there. Once we got home, I got the leather belt. I remember this spanking the most b/c the welp marks bled.... I'm so tired of this lack of discipline in kids. I have come across some of the rudest little twerps EVER, and am so happy I don't have any of my own. I know for a fact my temper would get the best of me if I had one.
rant over.
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Replies
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You obviously don't have kids. I am sure when you do you will be an amazing mother and your kids will never throw tantrums though.0
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You obviously don't have kids. I am sure when you do you will be an amazing mother and your kids will never throw tantrums though.
+10 -
Yeah. Whatever.
Poor dad. Feel sorry for him. Don't judge. He can't punch a 4 year old in the face for acting like every other 4 year old I've met in my entire life of meeting 4 year olds.0 -
You know... now that I have my own "Rude little twerps" I am much less judgemental of what other parents go through.
Personally if I was the man we'd have left and the child would have gone to time out or bed when we got home.
But everybody does what works for them. Sometimes parents don't take their children out when they are young and tantrum prone, which tends to prolong the period of time in which they are tantrum prone.
Please never have children. Please.0 -
You obviously don't have kids. I am sure when you do you will be an amazing mother and your kids will never throw tantrums though.
I don't even HAVE kids yet and I agree with this ^^^0 -
Children will be children. I threw my fair share of tantrums. My parents were never sappy enough to plead with me to stop, but they certainly never hit me so hard with a belt that I bled. I hope that method doesn't get passed down the family.0
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Other people's children suck.0
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You know... now that I have my own "Rude little twerps" I am much less judgemental of what other parents go through.
Personally if I was the man we'd have left and the child would have gone to time out or bed when we got home.
But everybody does what works for them. Sometimes parents don't take their children out when they are young and tantrum prone, which tends to prolong the period of time in which they are tantrum prone.
Please never have children. Please.
^^^^^ This!
I would have put my stuff down and left the store, but that was not me nor my child, he handled it the way he did and so be it. Can't judge nor should you be stewing over the face that a 3 or 4 year old had a tantrum (GASP). Kids have tantrums, it's part of life, don't like it then don't have kids.0 -
You obviously don't have kids. I am sure when you do you will be an amazing mother and your kids will never throw tantrums though.
+1
+2 And from the fact if he had spanked his son in the parking lot and someone with a camera phone had filmed it...he would be in jail and labled worst dad ever by the media.0 -
I don't have a problem with crying kids, even though when I was little if I cried in public I got one warning and if I continued we left right then and there. Getting denied fun things made me stop that behavior real quick. However, I have lots of younger cousins and I understand children are difficult.
Reason number 490548 why I'm terrified to have kids. I know one day I'll be the parent people are judging without any knowledge of the situation. Oh man.0 -
My kids don't act like that at all because they know they will get a spanking... Spanking is so effective I don't even need to do it any more. I just give them a look and they shape right up. I remember when I was a kid my dad whooped me with his belt on the cereal isle; these days you'd probably have the cops called on you, but I never ever acted up with my dad because all it takes is one time.0
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I'm not a parent, but my sister's children were both (and still are) prone to loud and raging tantrums. I would remove the child from the store and march them out into the car, where we would sit and they could scream till their hearts content. Usually, after a few minutes of realizing their audience had been reduced to just me, they would stop. Sullenly, but they would stop. If they didn't, we went straight home and they got something taken away.
I personally dislike the use of objects to hit children. If I were to take off my belt and whack an adult, I'd be charged with assault with a weapon. I see no difference in hitting a small child with an object, who is less able to defend themselves, both physically and legally. When I have spanked the kids, I've always used an open hand.
I also understand that taking the kid outside is not always a viable option. Sometimes they scream. It gets on my nerves badly and will occasionally chase me out of stores, but I don't give the parents dirty looks or anything. Kids will be kids.0 -
My kids don't act like that at all because they know they will get a spanking... Spanking is so effective I don't even need to do it any more. I just give them a look and they shape right up. I remember when I was a kid my dad whooped me with his belt on the cereal isle; these days you'd probably have the cops called on you, but I never ever acted up with my dad because all it takes is one time.
How old were your kids when you started spanking them? How old are they now?0 -
You obviously don't have kids. I am sure when you do you will be an amazing mother and your kids will never throw tantrums though.
Yup. You should've pointed out that father's shortcomings to his face like a real woman.0 -
I was in Michaels yesterday and this father and son were shopping. I guess his kid (who looked around 3 or 4) wanted something, but dad wouldn't get it for him. This kid started pitching a fit in the store, crying...screaming (the usual tantrum). We got to listen to that for 45 minutes. We also had the joy of being in front of this kid and his dad in line to check out (more high pitched screaming and crying). The dad is trying to console this kid...but it doesn't stop him. When they got outside, the kid lays down on the sidewalk and basically starts thrashing and screaming and crying. Meanwhile, the dad is PLEADING with his 4 yr old to stop. WTH?? Why is a grown man trying to conjole this spoiled little brat? WHY do parents do this?
To any of you older people, what would your parents have done? I have one very distinct memory of pitching a fit for some doll. My parents took me out to the car and I got spanked there. Once we got home, I got the leather belt. I remember this spanking the most b/c the welp marks bled.... I'm so tired of this lack of discipline in kids. I have come across some of the rudest little twerps EVER, and am so happy I don't have any of my own. I know for a fact my temper would get the best of me if I had one.
rant over.
Quit your b*tching. You'll get over it.0 -
Mine tends to get a bit unruly and whiney if she is tired or hungry, but I don't put up with tantrums like that. Mine gets a warning or two, then a flick in the forehead right between the eyes if behavior continues. She usually knocks it off after that. If mine ever laid down like that, though, I would have just said "Bye" and kept going a few feet further (make sure kid didn't run into street or anything). Quickest way to get a kid in the car is to make them think you're leaving without them.0
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Parents are in a tough spot. If they haul off and spank the kid like it needs they could get accused of abuse. Its happened! Personally I would have hauled the kid out of the store (no going through the check out, just leave everything there), put him in the car, driven him home, and put him to bed.0
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You obviously don't have kids. I am sure when you do you will be an amazing mother and your kids will never throw tantrums though.
+1
+2
If you dont have kids you have no idea how horrifying it is when your kids freak out in the store. If you try to just console long enough to hurry up and get what you need and get out of the store people like you judge. If you grab them, yell at them or God Forbid spank them you have other people judging you and calling Department of Children and Family Services.0 -
I'm so glad the responses here are reasonable. Children have not yet had enough experience of the world to reason or react logically to things; they are tiny little lunatics and sometimes they will act like it. I probably would have brought him home and put him to bed or sat him in his bedroom by himself till he calmed down, but maybe the father had no childcare and needed to finish his Christmas shopping? I know that the sound of a child crying is one of the worst noises, but sometimes they're tired or not feeling well or sometimes they just have tantrums. I'm not going to call someone a bad parent because he didn't beat his four year old till he drew blood (wtf?).0
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I echo the sentiment of trying to be a bit more understanding, although I don't believe that the dad in the situation did the right thing here.
I don't have kids myself, but I do plan on having them within the next couple years. However, I have two much younger sisters & two young god children who I will discipline if things get out of hand.
Every kid is different. Every child responds to discipline differently, and every kid has a bad day, just like you have bad days that you probably act like a rude little twerp yourself (I do, and I'm an adult). While the father in this situation shouldn't have begged and pleaded with his child and just simply removed him from the store (both for the kid's own benefit and for that of the other customers), try to have a bit more patience.
If it were my kid I would have taken him and left the store, then punished him/her when I got home by taking something away. Were it my parents, my mom would have probably threatened me (wait till I tell your dad...) and then I would have been in huge trouble when he got home. I do think the brand of discipline my parents enforced has made me a normal, grounded person, but every parent has their own style - and that's the thing, it's not your kid, so you don't have to agree with it.
Also, you take comfort in the fact that you dont have to come home to it yourself.0 -
My parents never put up with that from me or my siblings.
If one of us started the temper tantrum in public, they got punishment when we got home (never spankings but usually were put in time-out and had to eat dinner alone in their room instead of with the rest of us) and were left at home the next 2 or 3 times the rest of us went out just to reinforce the point. Feeling left out of family activities was enough for us to shape up.
This happened to my oldest brother a lot. He was a bit of a hothead as a kid.
I am not a fan of hitting kids especially not of leaving marks and hitting them until they bleed.0 -
I gotta say, my parents would have never, ever tolerated a tantrum in public from me. Any time I got a little loud and fussy, they took me somewhere private and told me if I didn't stop it I'd lose my favorite toy for a week or not get to watch my favorite movie, and they always followed through. You don't have to hit your kids to discipline them, but you'd better still frikkin discipline them. I don't love your child, and I don't want to hear it, just like no one wanted to hear me screaming.0
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I am glad the dad didn't give in and buy what the kids wanted...
OP- Iam sorry your parents beat you with a belt, that is really sad that children have to be beat to be taught...
I have two little ones, they are by far perfect...0 -
To any of you older people, what would your parents have done? I have one very distinct memory of pitching a fit for some doll. My parents took me out to the car and I got spanked there. Once we got home, I got the leather belt. I remember this spanking the most b/c the welp marks bled.... I'm so tired of this lack of discipline in kids. I have come across some of the rudest little twerps EVER, and am so happy I don't have any of my own. I know for a fact my temper would get the best of me if I had one.
rant over.
So you were abused as a child and want others to perpetuate that?
You go girl. not.0 -
This.You obviously don't have kids. I am sure when you do you will be an amazing mother and your kids will never throw tantrums though.
You're a real peach.0 -
My daughter threw a fit at Walmart once. I took her to the car to spank her. I actually had someone follow me out of the store, get in their car, and block me in so that I couldn't leave while he called the police.
What exactly is a parent supposed to do? Damned if they do and damned if they don't. Because no matter how you treat your kids or discipline your kids, there is always some A$$hat out there that thinks it's okay for them to tell you how to raise your children.
Rant elsewhere! We don't want to hear that ****!0 -
I cant even count how many times my very hyper 3 year old has thrown a fit over some piece of crap toy or sugar filled treat, and I've had to leave without getting what I came for. Stuff happens as a parent and you just gotta roll with it! Feel sorry for that dad because most of us know how it feels when your kids screaming and it seems like everyone is staring at you! Life is messy and loud with kids, but honestly I would put up with all the screaming, throwing myself on the ground, drama filled tantrums in the world to hear "I love you mommy" every night before bed! Be a little more understanding!0
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If the dad stuck to his guns and didn't get the kid what he wanted, he clearly was not a "spoiled little brat", as you so eloquently put it. The kid was being a KID! The do that. My son had a laying on the ground, screaming, kicking, crying tantrum at Sams club not long ago. I stopped shopping, sat down on the floor with him, and talked to him until he calmed down. All the judgemental looks and comments from people didn't seem to help things. When he finally calmed down (maybe 10-15 minutes), we left the store empty handed. I told him part of the punishment was that we weren't getting anything and we were going straight home to bed. Which we did. The next day, when he wanted the yogurt we had in the cart, but didn't bring home, he kind of understood how his actions affected things. He's not thrown a fit like that since.
But good luck when you have kids. I know, given your superior attitude, you'll be a great parent. :flowerforyou:0 -
I don't have a problem with crying kids, even though when I was little if I cried in public I got one warning and if I continued we left right then and there. Getting denied fun things made me stop that behavior real quick. However, I have lots of younger cousins and I understand children are difficult.
Reason number 490548 why I'm terrified to have kids. I know one day I'll be the parent people are judging without any knowledge of the situation. Oh man.
Parents judge other parents far less often then you think. I know when I give a parent of a miss behaving kid a look, it's a look of compassion and 'been there'. every parent needs to do what they feel is right for their child. it may not be how another parent would handle it, but that's no one else s business, unless of course the child is getting a beating, then i'd say, interfere away!
Kids are fantastic and scary and wonderful and I would never regret having mine!0 -
We have to be careful not to judge based upon how things appear. I have three children. I spanked all three as they were growing up. However, I have one child that has autism. She threw fits and we had to figure out why before we corrected her. In her world, things don't line up the way they do for me. A child with autism could throw a fit just because the tag on his or her shirt is irritating he or she, but that child cannot communicate that problem. My daughter (13 now) still cannot speak well. She cannot understand a lot of things. She doesn't throw a fit much anymore, but she still gets very frustrated when she is trying to communicate something and cannot get it out. So, this dad may have been dealing with something like that. I know I what it is like to be that dad in line. It is horrible. I feel sorry for the dad you speak of.0
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