Do you get a lot more attention after weight loss?

MyChocolateDiet

who bumped one of JButt's threads?

FoodFitnessTravel

oh absolutely

DerekVTX

I am working hard towards my goals, have already dropped 15 lbs but still no romantic attention from my wife. I live in a sexless marriage (Because I am overweight I am told), so I really hope the hard work pays off. Regardless it will pay off anyways because I feel better about myself already.

fitfreakymom

People are generally far more attracted to a partner that is fit and slim over one that is overweight because we want healthy partners that will be around for a while. Our brains are just programedthat way, out in the wild animals will not mate with those that are sick, slower than the pack, injured ect because they want the best and healthiest mate they can be with and humanes are not really tht differeent.

fitfreakymom

And for those saying they get negative attention from women after losing it is probebly because you are now a threat to them especially if they are overwieght, not happy or insecure.

bd0027

Yep. It's odd to me but it's flattering at times.

Escloflowne

Women just throw themselves at me now, lucky I have a girlfriend and have an excuse not to...you know...kiss their face!!!

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Derpes

I am working hard towards my goals, have already dropped 15 lbs but still no romantic attention from my wife. I live in a sexless marriage (Because I am overweight I am told), so I really hope the hard work pays off. Regardless it will pay off anyways because I feel better about myself already.

I hope your next girlfriend appreciates it.

Lose the wife.

+1

lizc0616

I really think its mainly confidence. When you don't feel attractive because you're not happy with your weight you look sad. People don't like sad, unconfident people.

Conversely, when you feel sexy and toned (even if you statistically still are overweight), you just ooze happiness and good vibes. People are attracted to happy, confident people.

Take it all in stride. Be complimented and feel good and then use that as fire to keep going.

:drinker: this! this is me all day long! ^

theseus82

Yes. I do get a lot more attention after losing the weight. There's a lot more interest from the opposite sex now. The problem is, I still have extra skin that I'll need to have removed. My highest weight was 318. So I'm in the bind of having to explain that I look good with clothes on but not as much without them. Otherwise, when things finally get to that point they might be a bit surprised by what they find. I'm pretty sure that even with this advanced warning my last girlfriend was really surprised about it. She was gorgeous herself and never had any weight problems.

I'm not at all upset about the lack of attention before versus now. It's understandable. When I was married, my wife tipped the scales beyond 450 pounds. I knew privately that I found myself less and less attracted to her as she continued to gain more and more weight. She eventually got the gastric bypass procedure and lost weight.

I guess I'm not sure why people who lose so much weight are shocked to find that people are more attracted to them after they lose weight. Physical attraction still counts for something. We need to have chemistry and physical attraction often gets things started. I date women for who they are and their personality. But honestly I know that a beautiful woman does catch my eye a little more. I'm not a shallow person, mind you. When I dated my wife before we were married, she was quite heavy. It was herself as a person I was interested in. If I was completely shallow, I would've never continued dating her. Nor would I have married her. But if you still have a heartbeat and you're a man, it's almost impossible not to notice when someone is attractive to you. Regardless of whether you're in a relationship or not. It doesn't mean you act on that impulse at all, but you do notice!

sparklelioness

I get more attention, but it's hard to "believe" it. A lot of times my first thought is "what is he LOOKING at? Did I cut him off? Is my zipper down?" Then it dawns on me that maybe, just maybe, he thinks I'm cute.

verhunzt

Yes, but not because I am thinner but because I am more outgoing and confident in my own skin. I remember a time when I was quite heavy but still really confident - I got the same amount of attention.
Believe it or not, but looks ACTUALLY don't matter that much. It's mostly about confidence.

DeterminedFee201426

yes i get alot more attention sence the weight loss

connorsw95

I think it has more to do with how you conduct yourself after losing weight. Obviously your new and improved appearance is likely to capture attention, but I think, from my experience anyway, after losing weight you're far more likely to choose more fitted outfits and walk confidently - confidence attracts attention! You wearing your skin proudly and with confidence i think contributes to a more attractive person. People can't see your face if you're always looking at the floor eh? :laugh: :flowerforyou:

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lee91356

I really think its mainly confidence. When you don't feel attractive because you're not happy with your weight you look sad. People don't like sad, unconfident people.

Conversely, when you feel sexy and toned (even if you statistically still are overweight), you just ooze happiness and good vibes. People are attracted to happy, confident people.

Take it all in stride. Be complimented and feel good and then use that as fire to keep going.

Well said.

I totally agree with this as well. It's the confidence that shows more. I feel that I get more attention now that some of my weight has come off.

VERY TRUE I dont feel attractive AT ALL (after a 150 pound loss due to excess skin) and therefore I have rarely been hit on since I dont give out that "vibe", and the times its happened I have been oblivious to it until after the fact lol.

I think it is confidence because I have friends who get TONS of attention from the opposite sex and they are not skinny (both are "plus sizes") or super-model pretty but man do those chicks have confidence!

SeanSilk

Yes I tend to get more stares from women in public, especially at the gym. I've come a long way in losing weight. I wasn't always overweight. I gained weight through anti-depressants. But when I switched to one that didn't have weight gain side effects, I dropped the weight quick. Since I was born with a mesomorphic body type, I gained muscle very easily.
The attention is new, and annoying at the same time, if that makes sense. It makes me realize what kind of shallow world we live in.
But I intend to ignore it and not make any eye contact at all. After all, I am happily engaged.

SomeNights246

Not really, I just get attention from a different crowd of people.

I really started to see that individual men and women really do have their preferences.

COliver416

Yes, my new pictures on OkCupid of my thinner, fitter, muscular self, has upped my response rate from 1 out of ever 5 to 50% of all my messages getting responses, and some messages being sent my way. Also, from facebook, female friends I hadn't talked to in a long time, started messaging me, and commenting on my change. So, it's awesome, and fun!

Timshel_

I just want women to worship me.

Well, more than they do now.

Tedebearduff

I'd like to hear from people who experience a noticeable increase in sexual/romantic attention from others after losing weight? How do you experience and/or handle this?

I ask too because sometimes people gain weight as a form of hiding from attention or feeling uncomfortable with it.

Yes, it's kind of awesome honestly.... takes allot of time to adjust to.. people are generally nicer to you too... more ppl talk to you ... it's just different. Now that could also be because I was more confident, held my head up a bit higher ... just not a downer anymore... so can't say it is all cause of the weight loss.

The one thing I will say is that girls who were always friends who all of a sudden were interested in me had 0 chance. I refused to deal with any of them because I am still the same person ... my heart has not changed ... did not change, who I am is the same just the outside changed. Seeing them looking at me differently was the weirdest part, I don't associate with any of them anymore to say the least.

Just don't let it go to your head... is what everyone always says. I don't feel like that happened to me but I have seen it happen to others, honestly in most cases it's girls who let it go to their heads.... this is my experience so I am speaking from what I've seen in my life not what I've seen on the internet kids.

keithaj1

Two things happen when you have a significant weight loss. One, you are more attractive to others. Two, you are more confident about yourself. The combination of these two things can and will lead to you receiving and be open to interest from others.

spa407

I really think its mainly confidence. When you don't feel attractive because you're not happy with your weight you look sad. People don't like sad, unconfident people.

Conversely, when you feel sexy and toned (even if you statistically still are overweight), you just ooze happiness and good vibes. People are attracted to happy, confident people.

Take it all in stride. Be complimented and feel good and then use that as fire to keep going.

I have to agree. The attention is often a confidence issue.

SeanSilk

Awesome story. I lost a lot of weight due to Anti-Depressant med change. Then I got in shape and I've noticing female attention both at the gym and in public. It's a shame how people can be so superficial. But don't pay them any mind. I am getting married to a woman who got to know me as a person, not because I work out. I wouldn't settle for a shallow women. And your husband sounds like a great guy.

KezShiels

My weight has fluctuated over the years but I tend to get more attention at 84kg than I ever do 15-20kg lighter

Becksga

i think that hiding was my main reason for allowing myself to reach the size i did. i didn't want people to see me, so i made myself invisible in the largest way possible. weird, isn't it?

I so get this.

It is very irritating because I am the exact same person I have always been and now, NOW people who have known me for years want to show me attention?!!?? Uhm, no thanks.

gothchiq

Yes. I get hit on constantly. I wish that when I tell dudes I am married, they would respect that and stop it. That ring is on my finger for a reason. Compliments are one thing, but actual attempts are rather disrespectful under the circumstances.

Wookinpanub

Excellent topic!

I am married and frankly everyone I associate or socialize with know that I am married so the opportunities are not there. I don't even wear a ring bc I got too fat for it to fit comfortably. I must admit I am curious to see if "I still got it" after dropping 40 lbs and I will try to make eye contact with an attractive lady or strike up a random conversation. Nothing I would consider flirting back to me.

Funny because when I was at my heaviest last fall, I was at a resort in Phoenix with my wife and this hot younger girl gave me the eff me eyes and it made my night.

LovelyVegetarian

I am happily married for almost 10 years. I gained 56 lbs with kid 1 and 70 with kid 2 and never quite got back to pre-preggo weight until recently. I have noticed a direct correlation between my husband's sex drive and how fit/slim I am. When I am exercising, watching what I eat and feeling confident, he is literally constantly all over me - to the point of harrassment (LOL!). Whenever I fall a bit off the wagon, he is still very much all over me but a bit less. He has a very high sex drive and it's all good but I have noticed that the minute I am looking (and feeling) better, he reacts immediately. It's not concious. He has loved me every shape and size, even when I was a huge pregnant person, he wanted up in my business. He says he's not aware of it but I most certainly am!

As for others, yes, at work I get a lot more attention. I think that has to do with better fitting clothes too. Outside of work, yes I sometimes get hit on. It mostly makes me feel uncomfortable.