Do you get a lot more attention after weight loss?

fitfreakymom

Sometimes our partners will notice the extra attention even when we don't.

UnoDrea3732

I know when I hit my all time low it was difficult going out with my friends because of the attention. I think that is mainly the reason for me packing on the lbs.

I definitely know that sex was better and my DH can 2nd that.

TheFitHooker

Yes I've exp. this a lot. Normally when it happens, I will smile and be very sarcastic because, well that's me.

I had a few guys make comments like "Why do you have to be married" these are guys I'm actually friends with, and they wouldn't have a chance anyway because they are like 10 year's younger then I am, and I told the last one that "Because when I met my husband I was 19, which mean's you were 9, it never would have worked".

I had a guy when I was waiting tables say "What would it take for me to bring you home with me tonight?" I replied "A million dollars and a talk with my husband." Guy said "Oh you're married?" I replied "Well I guess that's why he keeps waking up next to me every morning for the past 10 years."

I had a guy once ask me to go home with him and I just replied with "I'm sorry, I'm happily married." All that got me was a "I didn't invite your husband, just you." SMH... So I learned to go with the sarcastic replies, that seems to always work.

It usually breaks the ice, either they laugh and realize it isn't gonna happen and they talk to me like a person and not like a piece of meat. Or they get pissy and leave. Which ever is fine by me.

DenverGirl93

Yes, and it's a funny thing. I went through many fat and invisible years and because of that, I do appreciate the looks or comments, but at the same time I think to myself that if I am the same person as before, why should weight make a difference to others and their treatment of me? just felt a bit let down that we could all be so superficial. But I do get that we are physical beings and are affected by first impressions. After that, we have to keep them interested with something else than the physical attraction. I just thank God that I've been married to the same man who has seen me at my best and my worst, and loved me the same through all of it!
I

Yes!!!! and my sentiments exactly!

shaydon80

I ask too because sometimes people gain weight as a form of hiding from attention or feeling uncomfortable with it.

This is me. When I was at my thinnest (about a year ago) I got a lot of attention. It scared me and I went back to old habits (comfort food, late night snacking, etc) and I gained back about 20lbs. I want to go back to the weight at which I feel best, but I have no idea how to deal with this issue.

tinglesby

I do. And thats all well and fine; but the thing i hate is when people who treated me like **** when i was heavier all of a sudden are super nice to me. Screw that mess!! Fake, pretentious people!!

KANGOOJUMPS

hell yeah!

Devasation

Yes. I showed my girlfriend whom I've been dating for about a month or so my "before" pics, and she said she said she probably wouldn't have noticed me at all looking the way I used to.

Superficial, yeah, but hey, thems are the breaks. She also does crossfit, so being healthy, etc., is a big deal to her.

EmilyEmpowered

I really don't get any more attention,maybe because I don't ever go anywhere except the grocery store and work,unless I'm with my kids...I'm feeling left out now,Lol. Of course I didn't lose weight to get more attention,so I guess I'll get over it! I only get bothered when I hear my friends saying how they're always getting hit on,and I realize the homeless guy who opened the door at the gas station was the closet I got :laugh: (&I think he was just hoping for a dollar!)

lucystacy71

I was never really the type of person who attracted a lot of attention, and I truly haven't noticed any more lately. Of course, I still have a long way to go.

shoopies

Definitely a big difference. . .I felt like there was a certain weight threshold, that once I passed it (in terms of losing), all of the suddent I started getting second glances, etc. People in general are just WAY friendlier when you weigh less.

yoovie

I get an exponentially huger amount of more attention.

I also get that additional attention from better quality sources than the attention i got when i was fat.

But I also realize that a lot of the attention that I perceive as 'new' was simply attention I was blind too or in denial about before- because I didnt think I deserved it, or I thought people were being mean or sarcastic and now I realize it is actually genuine.

It used to be that I would be out with friends at a bar and a guy and his friend would come over and hit on my best friend and I. I would instantly get up and go home without a word because I felt bad for the guy that got stuck keeping me occupied so his buddy could hook up with Jen.

LadyofLight08

I have received an exceptional amount of attention. A little too much for my liking, but I suppose being a ghost when I was fat wasn't any better lol

MickeyBoo

The last time I reached my goal weight I was a bit oblivious to the extra attention, still very much in 'I'm fat and invisible' mode and also thinking why the hell would anyone chat me up? I saw all my flaws and very little of my assets!

A so called friend of my hubby was making the moves and I didn't even see it, just thought he was being friendly, my hubby pointed it out to me after he realised that the guy was purposely coming over an hour before hubby said he'd be home, and I didn't realise that he hadn't just popped in After that I was embarrassed that I didn't notice what the guy was saying had a double meaning and hadn't noticed him staring etc. I was instantly uncomfortably around anyone who was flirty, and didn't like that just because I was physically more attractive that it meant I was more worthy of being looked at or spoken to. I do enjoy the invisibility of being fat!

This time around it's something that I know I will have to face, I am very cynical about that kind of thing and life in general, so I can only hope that I can be learn to be gracious when receiving a compliment. It's the touchy/feely/huggy people that suddenly spring up that I really don't like.

missshoes07

I'd like to chime in about your 2nd question. I haven't ever been significantly overweight but I have lost nearly 15 lbs in the last 10 months. I'm healthier and more fit. I've done a 5K and an 8k this year! Blood work in a couple months will give the definite numbers of progress. Anyway, I actually thought of a bible verse when I saw your questions. "Whatever happens, conduct yourself in a manner of Christ"
Even if you don't have a relationship with Christ, I think you can still pull something from this about confidence. It's all about your response. There's a creepy dude at work that commented about my weight loss. I said thank you and moved on. I don't have to engage it. I can just say thank you and smile to anyone that comes at me. A person's character will tell you whether it's genuine or leary. Know where your worth is. Be proud that you are a healthier you. How you carry yourself will normally produce what kind of response you want to receive. If it's significant weight loss then it might be beneficial to have someone help you dress the new you and what's now appropriate for your new body.
Yes, I feel fabulous about the lost inches but I'm happier about the less stress on my heart and joints and my cholesterol being lower than I am about the smaller jean size. (and I mean general 'you' not specifically) Oh! And a gentle reminder: don't trust the mirror. It took about 4 months of not "seeing" a difference even though my measuring tape confirmed progress. You might 'see' something that isn't exactly true. I hope this finds people encouraged.

IanBee93

I really think its mainly confidence. When you don't feel attractive because you're not happy with your weight you look sad. People don't like sad, unconfident people.

Conversely, when you feel sexy and toned (even if you statistically still are overweight), you just ooze happiness and good vibes. People are attracted to happy, confident people.

Take it all in stride. Be complimented and feel good and then use that as fire to keep going.

Oh God. People are attracted to what you look like on the outside. No matter what your confidence is. If you're attractive but look sad people will care more about you, and will want to comfort you. If you're unattractive, people will notice but not care, unless they're you're friends.

amirahdaboss

Bump!

psych101

I spent most of my life overweight - I was the biggest kid at my high school. I never had a boyfriend until I was in my 20s. Then I lost a lot of weight (lost 110lbs) and started to go out more and got a LOT of attention. I never really knew how to accept compliments and I never knew when someone was hitting on me. I always thought people were making fun of me or mocking me, or were chatting me up for a dare or a bet or just to be cruel. I found it really hard to understand that anyone was attracted to me.

Now that I'm married and have a baby I look back and think - wow I looked damn good then! and I still do (though a little more baby weight to go lol)

MelsAuntie

No. Nobody notices or says anything.

EdTheGinge

Can't say I've noticed any attention from the girls but in general nah