Your swear alternatives (no real profanity, please)

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Replies

  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
    crap on a plate
    frick
    biscuit eater
    bastage
  • AllAboutThatTreble
    AllAboutThatTreble Posts: 156 Member
    frick/fricking
    fudge monkeys - I use this one the most
    dangit
    sugar
    shut the front door

    The only time I use the real words is when I'm alone and no one is around, and even then it makes me uncomfortable.

    I've gotten in trouble too many times as a child for simply saying "shut up" or "stupid" that anything more hardcore than that makes me look over my shoulder to see if my mom is listening.
  • kimmynw1
    kimmynw1 Posts: 97 Member
    Cheese and Rice.....you can kind of guess what that one is!
  • michelle7673
    michelle7673 Posts: 370 Member
    "What the cheese???"
  • 73Freckles
    73Freckles Posts: 201 Member
    What in the Sam Henry!!
  • KittyViolet
    KittyViolet Posts: 220 Member
    My nephews watches a cartoon where they always say "Oh, coconuts" when something goes wrong. That's what we try to use if little ears are around.

    This one reminds me of "Barnacles" and "Tartar sauce" from Spongebob.

    I use these on a regular basis lol! I'm also partial to "fudgecicles", "flock", and "nertz".
  • jennmodugno
    jennmodugno Posts: 363 Member
    I grew up Mormon, with a VERY conservative mother, so my siblings and I got pretty creative. I think my favorite was "Globber monkey." It's just really fun to say!

    Now that I'm grown and an atheist, I could feasibly say whatever I want, but I've never gotten out of the habit of using less-offensive words. My go-to curse is usually something along the lines of "gosh-freaking-dagnabbit!" or "Holy cannoli!"
  • mikey1976
    mikey1976 Posts: 1,005 Member
    butthead
    dork
    screwball
    jerkytreat
    spanky
    dumbarse

    but other then this i'm a sailor raised around the f bomb for half my life
  • Cinabean
    Cinabean Posts: 44 Member
    Son of a biscuit
    Crap on a cracker
    Oh for the love of PETE
    For the love of God!
    What the....
    Son of a ....
    God.....
    Bull....
    F....
    I have kids... I do a lot of starting words & not finishing them. I am sure many think I have a speech impediment. Lol
  • DisneyAddictRW
    DisneyAddictRW Posts: 800 Member
    Scuba Steve ....usually when we step on a toy. A.ka. Stepping on a Lego!
  • Hickyvikki69
    Hickyvikki69 Posts: 371 Member
    " oh hockey sticks " damn
    " fudge knuckles" ****
  • Shrelana
    Shrelana Posts: 248 Member
    Fuzz buckets, Fuzzmugguts, Fuzzymcfuzzerton...whatever it turns into lol

    Shazoot and shazbots

    See also...indiscernable sounds...

    :D The kids at my work say I come with sound effects.

    edited for spelling :)
  • Territravel
    Territravel Posts: 165 Member
    Great googly moogly!

    Effin' a! (not really a swear word)

    Crapola

    Dadgummit

    I use all these except Effin A. Are you from the South?
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    Oh poo. (that's my go to)
  • TheVimFuego
    TheVimFuego Posts: 2,412 Member
    Collins works well for me as a substitute for the other C word.

    As in Phil.
  • Stevenbowtieman
    Stevenbowtieman Posts: 10 Member
    Holy Granola!
    BAD WORD!
    PROFANITY!
    piso mojado! (Spanish = wet floor, but it sounds real bad)
    Fargin' Bastidge
  • PaveGurl
    PaveGurl Posts: 244 Member
    I use fiddle-dee-dee, foo schnickens, riggim friggim, sweet fancy Moses, blast, great googly moogly, dad blast it, dag nabbit, and so many more. It really depends what comes out of my mouth when I'm in the moment, but those are some of my go-tos.

    I swear a LOT, so I have a LOT of alternatives :)

    (I love the idea of saying "profanity!" in lieu of actual profanity. That's golden)
  • FrankenBeanz
    FrankenBeanz Posts: 176 Member
    Fiddle sticks,
    Cheese and bread,
    for petes/fluffs sake,
    dagnamit,
    chuffin' nora!
    Chuck a duck.
  • TomjsAj
    TomjsAj Posts: 45 Member
    Holly Cannoli,

    Turtle Booo!

    Frigen
  • alias1001
    alias1001 Posts: 634 Member
    My mom always said "Great Scott Tissues."

    Never quite got the origin of that.

    But I curse regularly. So, I got nuthin'. :D
  • bookworm_847
    bookworm_847 Posts: 1,903 Member
    cheese n fries....and after seeing "tourettes guy" "Bob Saget!"

    I'll have to remember "Bob Saget!" That's a good one.

    Mine go-to words/phrases are:
    For crying out loud
    Good grief (an oldie but it still works)
    Cheez whiz
    Foo fighters... not sure how that one started


    Edited because I'm not sure if my last one would fall under the umbrella of "real profanity." It's a nonesense word that's a hybrid of several bad words. So, just in case... I'll keep it to myself :wink:
  • missmike16
    missmike16 Posts: 59
    shut the fluff up
    what the french toast
    good gravy
    sweet baby jesus
  • emsicle_o
    emsicle_o Posts: 162 Member
    Shizzle
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
    I like calling annoying idiots a twonk.
  • Fozzi43
    Fozzi43 Posts: 2,984 Member
    I just swear..but under my breath if kids are around..or my mother.
  • Terasome
    Terasome Posts: 3,808 Member
    fruit cake
    willy wonka
    dip stick
    car swipe
  • chunkermunker
    chunkermunker Posts: 35
    I never use substitutes.
    I adore spouting profanity. It's crazy that some words are considered 'bad words' when after all, they are just words and such delightfully expressive words at that.
    I still find it it quite frustrating that forums and messageboards censor us as they see fit. :(

    That said, I hate to hear swear words used in an aggressive manner. Particularly towards kids. It sounds more like a slap in the face than a slap in the face does.
  • MeeshyBW
    MeeshyBW Posts: 382 Member
    I never use substitutes.
    I adore spouting profanity. It's crazy that some words are considered 'bad words' when after all, they are just words and such delightfully expressive words at that.
    I still find it it quite frustrating that forums and messageboards censor us as they see fit. :(

    That said, I hate to hear swear words used in an aggressive manner. Particularly towards kids. It sounds more like a slap in the face than a slap in the face does.

    ^^^ Same!

    I swear like a sailor and I don't give two S***s about it. If you are offended because of swear words you need to get a life.
  • pixtotts
    pixtotts Posts: 552 Member
    I very very rarely swear... If i swear at you you you have really really upset me or made me really really angry and its my way of not crying (i cry when im angry too...)... lol.

    Even bloody hell is considered swearing in our house (which it cant be its in harry potter...lol) but I do say ruddy a lot..

    Now im going to be rather controversial and say I'm rather a fan of the view that people who need swear words to express themselves lack the intelligence to find other words that noone finds offensive to use...
    x
  • MeeshyBW
    MeeshyBW Posts: 382 Member
    Now im going to be rather controversial and say I'm rather a fan of the view that people who need swear words to express themselves lack the intelligence to find other words that noone finds offensive to use...
    x

    ^^^ This annoys me so much! this is pretty much the standard roll out excuse as to why people swear. It is old hat, we've heard it a thousand times and it simply is not the case.

    I'm an intelligent person with a wide vocabulary. I chose to swear because I am an adult and they are just other words in my vocabulary. I don't have kids, I socialise with free spirited adults and sometimes we like to drop the F-bomb. So what?! Don't think too much into it. It has absolutely no bearing on intelligence whatsoever.

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