Your swear alternatives (no real profanity, please)

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  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,248 Member
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    Cheese n rice. I even named my web comic that.
  • coliema
    coliema Posts: 7,646 Member
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    MOTHER FUZZY!
  • RobinvdM
    RobinvdM Posts: 634 Member
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    I use shapes.

    Or call people stupid Bilbos or Frodo-heads.

    it isn't pretty if Im calling you a hexagon. Just sayin.
  • melbogg
    melbogg Posts: 135
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    OH! I forgot LINT LICKER!
    love those Orbitz commercials
  • yowza101
    yowza101 Posts: 196 Member
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    I say fudge bars or make up something crazy. My 20 yo son just looks at me and laugh. He say why don't you say it, I say because the Lord says not to...SMILE.
  • apg2302
    apg2302 Posts: 667
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    Ah ****!
    Balls
    Bugger it

    Other than that I usually take a sharp intake if breath and then let out a tirade of nonsense such as:

    Buggeration of the highest magnitude!
  • mwilke
    mwilke Posts: 378 Member
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    Good Lord, (whatever I am talking about, for example ice) Holy Ice Batman, Really?!?, Seriously?!?, You have GOT to be kidding me... etc. I too have a sailor's mouth- Have worked in construction, factories with women (100 times worse than men...)
  • DeeVanderbles
    DeeVanderbles Posts: 589 Member
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    The woman on our morning country radio show has a ton of funny alternatives that I can't think of for the life of me right now.

    Elephant Dust. I'm not sure why Elephant instead of horse dust, cow dust, etc., I guess it's funnier.
  • bonniecarbs
    bonniecarbs Posts: 446 Member
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    GET THE FLOCK OUT THE HENHOUSE
  • ReclaimingSarah
    ReclaimingSarah Posts: 250 Member
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    One of my friends had to have a conference with her child's pre-school teachers because her kid was teaching all the other kids curse words that she heard at home and all the parents were mad. So, remembering that story, I basically just stopped swearing once I had a kid of my own. I've gotten fantastic at just saying the first sound like "Fuh" "Sh" or "Son of a..."
  • mwilke
    mwilke Posts: 378 Member
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    Shnikies
    Flippin

    I use these a lot, too
  • RoarNCorgi20s
    RoarNCorgi20s Posts: 13 Member
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    Well, let's see here

    Here's one I made up a long time ago, "Oh my Lorsh". Then people ask who's Lorsh? And you simply go, seriously, "The lord of hotdogs."

    OMIGOONIES!!!
    ARE YOU FREAKIN' KIDDING ME??!
    FRIKKEN AE!!!

    If youre a Rugrats fan :)
    CON FLABBIT!
  • todayis4me
    todayis4me Posts: 184 Member
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    When I remember to not ethereal thing...........Bless your heart. It's a classic and I live off sarcasm so really sometimes I mean it...sometimes I don't...it just fits.
  • capnrus789
    capnrus789 Posts: 2,731 Member
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    Motherless goat
    Mother puss bucket.
  • DeeBrownBaker
    DeeBrownBaker Posts: 145
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    um... I say SugarHoneyIcedTea

    what tha Eff!

    what the Freak!!

    mother fudrucker's mustard!

    heezy or h-e double hockey sticks

    get the FUNK outta my face

    or in the place of the swear word I will say BAD WORD really loudly...
  • DeterminedAshley
    DeterminedAshley Posts: 297 Member
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    *kitten*. It's always been, and always will be my go to swear word.
  • mommamills
    mommamills Posts: 437
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    Marlarkey for shi!
    Horse hockey
    Mother trucker
    Great googly moogly
    and my grandmother used to say...."Ah Fanavala!"
    Was sooo funny because my family is Italian and have pretty nasty mouths at times.
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
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    Mother puss bucket.

    LOL the best!

    Son of a monkey's uncle!
  • shoshi68
    shoshi68 Posts: 407 Member
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    Shazbat.
    Holy Freakin' Hannah and her Sisters!
  • Cinflo58
    Cinflo58 Posts: 326 Member
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    Motherplopper
    Frackin'

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