Your swear alternatives (no real profanity, please)

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  • rachielyon
    rachielyon Posts: 56
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    Jack-wagon is my personal favorite
  • zombiesama
    zombiesama Posts: 755 Member
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    Cotton-headed ninny muggins.


    :noway:

    It's from Elf

    -_-
  • sPaRkLiNgLYFE
    sPaRkLiNgLYFE Posts: 609
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    I don't use alternatives. I don't see the point in saying "shoot" instead of the four letter version. All you're doing is changing a few vowels but the intent is still there. Who decides which words are "bad?" Just seems silly.
    good point
  • eric_sg61
    eric_sg61 Posts: 2,925 Member
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    Oh, Bob Saget
  • sbbhbm
    sbbhbm Posts: 1,312 Member
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    I say "Fudge Monkey!" when I'm really ticked off. I don't swear too much, it's pretty limited to just when I'm talking dirty during naughty time...
  • coolraul07
    coolraul07 Posts: 1,606 Member
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    Mine = Flick, flack, flarn, filthy-filth, Oh snap, shiznit, fraggle-naggle bull, Sugar Honey Iced Tea, dannnng, beaverdam, isht, uckfay, summbish, some beaches, bah-stitches, wuff-da-cuff... :mad: :angry: :explode: :grumble:

    umm, I have some more, but ain't that enuff? :tongue:


    Following is not mine, but weirdness I've heard was "Pickles-n-Prune juice?"
  • PBsMommy
    PBsMommy Posts: 1,166 Member
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    Bull doo doo - alternative for bull s
    Horse shnit -another alternative for the s word
    Son of a biscuit eater - My perverted mind questions if this is really censored
    Holy fruckin frudge balls - An awesome censorship of the f bomb
    Holy mother of guacamole - I have no clue
    DA - Abbreviation for one of my favorite insults.
    dumb bafoon - I have no idea why I started saying this one.. Replaces DA
    son of a witch - replace the w with a b
    Awww Turds - another alternative for the s word
    suck it - meaning implied
    ah pissant - comes out sounding like croissant... my version of piss
    trucktard - combination of the censored version of the f bomb and an offensive word for mentally challenged

    I can't even list them all... And that's just the censored side around the kiddo and out of respect for the more conservative side of my family. When I am around the hubby or out of safe distant of virgin ears, I have no clue what comes out of my mouth half the time.

    I also Hulk out quite often atleast once a week.. Mostly at work... Some might say I have quite an anger issue..
  • kappyblu
    kappyblu Posts: 654 Member
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    rose-gives-finger.gif

    I do this all the time at work, LOL!

    I have used the Ross fists, too! :laugh: :bigsmile:

    I don't even know what this means (I hate that show). :grumble:

    lol I love Friends! It was Ross' way of flipping off his parents without using his middle finger. He was ticked at Rachel in that episode and did it. :drinker:
  • VanessaHeartsMasr
    VanessaHeartsMasr Posts: 727
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    I say Holy Mother! all the time.
  • zrmac804
    zrmac804 Posts: 369 Member
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    D'oh!
  • shoshi68
    shoshi68 Posts: 407 Member
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    Muddyflower.
    Racken' fracken'.
    H-E-Double Hockey Sticks.
  • Mceastes
    Mceastes Posts: 303 Member
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    My husband says "F-bombs", as in, "What the F-bombs is that loud noise?" Also, in the south we say "Well, bless her heart" instead of "Well, isn't she a dumb-a--"...it just sounds nicer. I have also used "barnacles" a time or two (curse you, SpongeBob!!!)

    Admittedly, I'm not great at censoring myself though. The way I see it, if I was, I'd be practically perfect and that just doesn't seem fair to everyone else.
  • BobbieLee1959
    BobbieLee1959 Posts: 605 Member
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    "aww...you feathered monkey"...you might be able to guess this one...

    "fiddle stix" is another fave

    "Grrr....What a BEEEhind!"

    "POOOOOOOOOPY CRAP!"

    "I don't give a rat's butt!"

    "Come on, move ya backside!"

    "You JOKIN me???"

    I have a lot of these...it took a long time to break myself of the words these replaced, but I do pretty well now...used to swear like a sailor!
  • crawford4398
    crawford4398 Posts: 441 Member
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    Oh Snap !
  • BobbieLee1959
    BobbieLee1959 Posts: 605 Member
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    Muddyflower.
    Racken' fracken'.
    H-E-Double Hockey Sticks.


    hehe...like muddyflower...reminds me of feathered monkey!
  • crazytreelady
    crazytreelady Posts: 752 Member
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    I call very one that is angering me, "hoss"... Like, "calm down there hoss"...

    It is basically in place of a*hole and such words
  • thefarside79
    thefarside79 Posts: 6
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    Sorry, I do not use alternatives. I use the real deal words. Unless I am in a professional situation of course.
  • morgennn
    morgennn Posts: 169 Member
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    I occasionally use "Oh France" for the f-word hehe
  • never124get
    never124get Posts: 163
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    Bat Rastards, son of a biscuit, shut the front door, go fly a kite, son of a monkeys uncle, annnnd my favorite, fudge monkeys (I've got most of these from my dad who has said these for awhile now...lol)
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,841 Member
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    Sugar, Frack a Racka, and such.

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