Why the need to bring people down who are in shape?
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Regularly I see people on MFP get shot down when they are in shape and trying to help others lose weight/get into shape, when requested.
Of course, the look I (or indeed Yo) hold not be your cup of tea, but to be insulting or incendiary seems to be a bit far?
Surely one should simply bypass a thread/comment or if you feel the need simply say "not to my taste thank you, but well done on meeting your goals" or similar? Just because my goals are different to yours, does not mean you should disrespect me, just like I will not disrespect yours.
We come on here to help/suggest/inspire people to meet/make their goals, yet it seems people make it their goal to hate/discriminate/harass/abuse/insult?
Of course, the look I (or indeed Yo) hold not be your cup of tea, but to be insulting or incendiary seems to be a bit far?
Surely one should simply bypass a thread/comment or if you feel the need simply say "not to my taste thank you, but well done on meeting your goals" or similar? Just because my goals are different to yours, does not mean you should disrespect me, just like I will not disrespect yours.
We come on here to help/suggest/inspire people to meet/make their goals, yet it seems people make it their goal to hate/discriminate/harass/abuse/insult?
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I've been around message boards for almost as long as they've been on the net and I moderated one for ever 10 years.
There are always people who are insecure and need to make themselves feel better by putting you down, questioning your advice or experience when they have nothing to offer of their own, etc.
The anonymous nature of sites like this make trolling very, very easy.
I've been on a few boards that required you to sign in with your real name as a way to stop this kind of thing.0 -
people get jealous ALL THE TIME HERE! even girls message me that are in GREAT shape and look hot giving me a negative message lol.. people ALWAYS try to bring others down when they feel sad about their own lives... anyways... i dont mind...
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That is why I stopped "helping" a long time ago.
Haters gonna hate.0 -
Regularly I see people on MFP get shot down when they are in shape and trying to help others lose weight/get into shape, when requested.
Of course, the look I (or indeed Yo) hold not be your cup of tea, but to be insulting or incendiary seems to be a bit far?
Surely one should simply bypass a thread/comment or if you feel the need simply say "not to my taste thank you, but well done on meeting your goals" or similar? Just because my goals are different to yours, does not mean you should disrespect me, just like I will not disrespect yours.
We come on here to help/suggest/inspire people to meet/make their goals, yet it seems people make it their goal to hate/discriminate/harass/abuse/insult?
I saw your post in the other thread, and the absurd reply of "she looks scary to me"...how a fit, strong women can look "scary" is beyond me.
I tell you what, these nobheads need to take a long hard look at themselves first.
Don't waste your energy on em duck
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It's a curious phenomenon. Your first respondent up there seems to embody it, as she denigrates both your looks and your emotions. Very classy. I guess you're supposed to suck it up because you've achieved so much? Not sure.
With love,
Burt.0 -
people get jealous ALL THE TIME HERE! even girls message me that are in GREAT shape and look hot giving me a negative message lol.. people ALWAYS try to bring others down when they feel sad about their own lives... anyways... i dont mind...
I love your flower! :flowerforyou:0 -
Never mind.0
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Awwww but I'm so interested in what you have to sayNever mind.
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Never mind.
Saw before the snip!
Anyone is capable of being an *kitten*, and yes you will defo find some people who are up their own behinds in shape, no doubt.
However, this thread is about helping people people out and the insults one gets back BASED on their shape when people post ASKING for help.0 -
Never mind.
Saw before the snip!
Anyone is capable of being an *kitten*, and yes you will defo find some people who are up their own behinds in shape, no doubt.
However, this thread is about helping people people out and the insults one gets back BASED on their shape when people post ASKING for help.
Me too...
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However, this thread is about helping people people out and the insults one gets back BASED on their shape when people post ASKING for help.
To be honest Matt, I read it as a general commentary about body shaming in general. It happens all the time on here. Either with the more muscular/defined women (and men) with a lower BF%, or about more slender people, or about thigh gaaps. The amount of times you see threads with "ewwwww gross' when someone has achieved what *they* want to achieve is really quite appalling.
Whether or not someone is asked for help is irrelevant. It is not acceptable in any situation.0 -
These boards are for people to get motivation and help from a community of people. I don't get why anyone has to put anyone down. Whether you are fit as hell or big as hell it shouldn't matter. If I see a woman who is too cut for my liking, I refuse to sit there and down them. Because they were not born that way. It took them a lot of hard work and determination to get that way and that is THEIR preference. Do I want to be cut like that? Nope, but I have respect for those that have the drive to do it. Just like if I see someone who is really obese I would never hurt their feelings. They probably have had enough of that. They are on here for help...aren't we all?0
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I'm calling this phenomenon PlanetFitnessitis...because just like their "judgment free zone" that has one very specific exception, MFP seems to be a "body shaming free zone" except for this one very specific exception.
It really is fascinating.0 -
Honestly, it's laughable to me seeing people who are 50+ lbs overweight body-bashing fit people using language a 3rd grader would use on a FITNESS site. If that were turned around the fit people here started saying "eww gross" about someone who is overweight, they would get IP banned in a heartbeat. Unfortunately, it happens here a lot more than it should despite being technically against the rules, and it says a whole lot more about the person throwing out that language than it does about the body types they deride.
My only guess is that they're insecure about themselves. As such, you can't ever really help them. All you can do is just ignore those comments and hope that someone lurking is listening and absorbing that information and go on about your business.0 -
Honestly, it's laughable to me seeing people who are 50+ lbs overweight body-bashing fit people using language a 3rd grader would use on a FITNESS site. It happens here a lot more than it should despite being technically against the rules.
My only guess is that they're insecure about themselves. As such, you can't ever really help them. All you can do is just ignore those comments and hope that someone lurking is listening and absorbing that information and go on about your business.
:laugh: this is what tickles me, when you see someone who is technically obese body bashing someone who is in great shape...
The anonymity allows people to channel their "inner nobhead"0 -
Honestly, it's laughable to me seeing people who are 50+ lbs overweight body-bashing fit people using language a 3rd grader would use on a FITNESS site. It happens here a lot more than it should despite being technically against the rules.
My only guess is that they're insecure about themselves. As such, you can't ever really help them. All you can do is just ignore those comments and hope that someone lurking is listening and absorbing that information and go on about your business.
:laugh: this is what tickles me, when you see someone who is technically obese body bashing someone who is in great shape...
The anonymity allows people to channel their "inner nobhead"
I'm totally fine with people expressing that a look isn't really "for them" as the OP also stated, but it's quite another thing to run around calling someone gross or disgusting or other such terms on a web forum for fitness and nutrition. No one here deserves to be called those names regardless of size or fitness level.0 -
I've been around message boards for almost as long as they've been on the net and I moderated one for ever 10 years.
There are always people who are insecure and need to make themselves feel better by putting you down, questioning your advice or experience when they have nothing to offer of their own, etc.
The anonymous nature of sites like this make trolling very, very easy.
I've been on a few boards that required you to sign in with your real name as a way to stop this kind of thing.
Did real names work? Did it eliminate trolling, etc.?0 -
Honestly, it's laughable to me seeing people who are 50+ lbs overweight body-bashing fit people using language a 3rd grader would use on a FITNESS site. It happens here a lot more than it should despite being technically against the rules.
My only guess is that they're insecure about themselves. As such, you can't ever really help them. All you can do is just ignore those comments and hope that someone lurking is listening and absorbing that information and go on about your business.
:laugh: this is what tickles me, when you see someone who is technically obese body bashing someone who is in great shape...
The anonymity allows people to channel their "inner nobhead"
I'm totally fine with people expressing that a look isn't really "for them" as the OP also stated, but it's quite another thing to run around calling someone gross or disgusting or other such terms. No one here deserves to be called those names regardless of size or fitness level.
Likewise, each to their own but as you say, it isn't acceptable to bring someone down due to their looks etc. It would be a different story if the boot was on the other foot....0 -
It's a curious phenomenon. Your first respondent up there seems to embody it, as she denigrates both your looks and your emotions. Very classy. I guess you're supposed to suck it up because you've achieved so much? Not sure.
With love,
Burt.
I think this is what's supposed to happen according to that logic. This is what I've been fearing when I reach goal weight because of all the time I've ever been at goal weight it has suddenly made me a person without feelings or intellect who is thus bashable. It's the way of the world unfortunately. OP shows himself to be intelligent and thoughtful in spite of his physical achievements. People want to feel they are superior in SOME way and accepting his and other fit people's advice would be admitting that he/she/they are more intelligent than them as well. Thus the bashing as if to say, "no i am definitely smarter than you, if i WANTED to look like that I would" and thus the insult. It's just mean no matter who it's being done to. We all make our own choices for ourselves and if we see someone we'd rather not look like, all we have to do is gloss over their advice not take the time to insult them. But honestly do we get our hair cut by a person with exactly the style we want? Do we refuse to get our house painted unless the painter shows us his house is that very color? It's appalling that people are so eager to not just throw away good well meaning, and FREE advice, but they feel the need to drop kick it, too? SMH.0 -
And genuinely is this really a scary look?
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