Your most humiliating "fat" experience.

supernova08

no offense but what an *kitten* there are a lot better ways to tell some one that they need to hit the guy or get a better bathing suit dont let something like that stop you from swimming! swimming is actually one of the best exercises that you could end up getting because it literally works every muscle in your body. but i commend you on how well you've done.keep up the good work and remember if your doing the best you can don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise!:bigsmile:

Celeigh12

Thankfully, I have never had anyone say something cruel to me about my weight, broken a chair or been asked if I'm pregnant, though I've lived in fear of all those things. My humiliations were always kind of quiet ones. Embarrassed when I couldn't keep up with others, not being able to fasten my seatbelt on a plane, but being too mortified to ask for an extender, sweating like crazy just standing still, being so wedged in a booth I could hardly breathe, seeing a horrific picture of myself and having someone say it was a "good one" of me, or avoiding doing things with others because I knew the weight wouldn't let me.

If anything, I avoided much of life to keep from having embarrassing experiences, which is sad all on its own. Having lost most of the weight, it's made me realize what a hermit I've become. So now I'm on to the fun but very scary part - learning to actually live my life without the hinderance of a weight problem. Better late than never, I suppose!

supernova08

I've had so many.... people are cruel.

I had one a few months ago...while out running I got yelled at by a passing car. "Keep Running Fat *kitten*" I still feel horrible inside when I think about this situation.

jesus people are so cruel! keep running your doing great

supernova08

I always try to find ways to help this man understand. He is like talking to a wall. He seems like an emotionless hole sometimes. Of course he wasn't always like that. He said that in the beginning when a guy wants sex, he will do anything he needs to do to get it on a regular basis. What?! I figured as much. In hind sight I wonder why I was ever so blind. But it is what it is now. This is what happens when we believe in our heart that someone is really good underneath and that they deserve a chance.
I guess to answer my own question, I do find that memories such as this do hold me back at times. I don't dwell on the bad stuff, but sometimes I am reminded when I see a certain picture or read or hear a certain comment. Letting go of hurt feelings is something I need to work on in my own life. Not just for my health, but for my happiness.

mmm i had a real *kitten* for an ex husband so i completely understand.( divorced me over face book while i way away in a different country for work,said i hadn't earned respect after i waited for him for two years to get out of prison etc) the best way to keep pushing yourself when you feel low is by thinking how GD AWESOME YOU ARE and how DARE anyone talk to you like that. your better than that and your better than they ever deserved and instead of wallowing kick butt at your work out and take some time to do the things you love with just as much intensity. At the end of the day look back and let yourself enjoy how much butt you kicked and just how amazing you really are and what a dumbass they are. lol works for me on bad day, days i had to deal with my ex etc.!

supernova08

I think the most embarrassing moment I had was when a guy at my work heard me talking to my dietitian and told me that i was fat because i was eating to many f**ing hamburgers and milkshakes and no wonder i was on the chuncky monkey list. truthfully i felt like crying but losing my temper was just a bit more satisfying especially when i threw my diet log in front of him and then asked if he ate as well or exercised as much as i did( i was on a 1600 calorie diet working out 10x a week for about 8 months didnt help much because i had stomach problems and i'm 6 feet tall so it literally made my body go into survival mode) his face turned a very interesting shade of purple and he stomped out of the office. satisfying but still semi hurtful

jackilync

I can't really choose a most embarrassing moment because I feel like every moment is embarrassing. I feel like the worst times were probably in high school because teenagers can be such jerks. I was called "the fat cheerleader" when anyone referred to me. That was extremely hurtful and I ended up only cheering two seasons because of it.

younginaz

OMG. Never ever say you are not attractive just because you have gained some weight! You are beautiful and you need to be positive!

All I can think is, you married this man why?

I often ask myself the same question. Too often in fact.

I know that being the weight I am Im not an attractive woman at all, but if my hubby EVER said anything so mean and disrespectful I would not put up with it. Your partner should stand by you and if he noticed you had gained weight should have come to you in private and just said so in a normal, nice way out of concern rather than supificial reasons.

themutineer

My ex used to ask me "Are you really going to eat that? You better be planning to hit the gym hard later." right in front of waiters whenever he would take me out to dinner. It would make me flush with embarrassment for dating such a jerk, and it made me feel terrible about myself.

He did this from the time I began actively trying to lose weight, never letting up on me - even after I had lost 60 pounds, and was technically considered underweight.

chezzielou1984

We all surely have some experience related to out weight that lingers in our minds. I wouldn't say I was even fat when this happened. I am 5'3", at the time I weighed 145 pounds. I was in the process of losing weight I gained from quitting smoking. Anyhoo, we were talking about going to the beach. My now husband, then boyfriend, made the remark that I should get a bigger swim suit. I was wondering what was wrong with the one I had. I asked him what he meant and why he said that. He would never really clarify. Finally he just yelled at me that I look disgusting in my swim suit. Needless to say, I haven't put on a swim suit since. I actually bought one last year, but I could never bring myself to wear the thing.

When you look back on these things do they motivate you? Do you feel a sense of hopelessness that drives you to failure over and over?

Oh my god!! What a jerk. You post has actually made me angry. How dare he speak to you like that and make you feel humiliated!! I would have hit my partner if he did anything like that to me.

Anyway... my most humiliating fat moment is wearing those slimming pant things to a wedding (with an overnight stop) this was the first time that me and my partner slept in the same bed together and well I forgot I was wearing them. I got changed for bed and I was so embarrased. He was not bothered and 2 1/2 years later we are still together and now I dont even bother with the big pants!!

JUDDDing

Anyhoo, we were talking about going to the beach. My now husband, then boyfriend, made the remark that I should get a bigger swim suit. I was wondering what was wrong with the one I had. I asked him what he meant and why he said that. He would never really clarify.

I get the feeling there was a whole annoying argument, where you would not let the topic drop, that occurred at this point.

Finally he just yelled at me that I look disgusting in my swim suit.

I wasn't there. But this seems like it was written to put him in a bad light.

Maybe he was trying to, with some candor, protect you from the humiliation of going to the beach in a very unflattering swimsuit? Then instead of simply taking the advice (or ignoring it), from someone you love - you sound like you badger him and start a fight until he lashed out.

What exactly did he need to clarify? If he suggested that you needed a bigger suit - it's obviously because this one, in his opinion, was too small and not flattering.

We see, a couple pages later, that this sort of advice is not considered universally inappropriate.

Why my husband didn't tell me NOT to wear a 2 piece bathing suit is beyond me.

For me, If I look like crap in my clothes - I _EXPECT_ my loved ones to point this out to me.

awtume9

sure looks matter in a relationship...but I know, hands down... that my husband can probably get a new girl in a minute, but she will not be me. He will be miserable and then he would think, he chose a petty thing to give me up over. So I think to myself when I am feeling blue over my weight, noone is perfect, and you can choose to choose someone upon their looks and have great arm candy...or you can choose on personality and substance and be happy.

So, you can not have one with out the other? My ex used to tell me I would never find someone as awesome as him.

I am with a gorgeous and generous man now that treats me like a princess.

I think many of the women on this site would like to think that they are great arm candy with a personality and substance. The thought that your husband can not get both is pretty disrespectful to him..

It's disrespectful towards him? You sound like a real gem.

juzmejnee

awwww thats not nice he could've said it differently

MayaSPapaya

First of all, i'm confused as to why your boyfriend would say something so rude to you.
My worst experience was when I got into my mom's car, went to sit down, and the side of my pants leg ripped. SO embaressing.

juzmejnee

my most humiliating experience was when me and my husband ( he is 6'3 and "big" ) and i am 4'11 and was around 226 at the time. We were trying to sit together on one of the rides at Disneyland. I sat in front of him. And we were trying to get the seatbelt on and it wouldn't reach. ONe of the people that worked there was pulling on the seatbelt, trying to get it to reach. OMGooshh. So emberassing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MelsAuntie

I can only think of one...finding out I can't get onto a tall horse without a mounting block. Though that's not much about being overweight, it's about being in my 60's and having no spring in my legs at all.

axialmeow

My total jerk of an ex always said I looked hot in a swimsuit, even at 240lbs. Why did you marry that guy

1223345

Anyhoo, we were talking about going to the beach. My now husband, then boyfriend, made the remark that I should get a bigger swim suit. I was wondering what was wrong with the one I had. I asked him what he meant and why he said that. He would never really clarify.

I get the feeling there was a whole annoying argument, where you would not let the topic drop, that occurred at this point.

Finally he just yelled at me that I look disgusting in my swim suit.

I wasn't there. But this seems like it was written to put him in a bad light.

Maybe he was trying to, with some candor, protect you from the humiliation of going to the beach in a very unflattering swimsuit? Then instead of simply taking the advice (or ignoring it), from someone you love - you sound like you badger him and start a fight until he lashed out.

What exactly did he need to clarify? If he suggested that you needed a bigger suit - it's obviously because this one, in his opinion, was too small and not flattering.

We see, a couple pages later, that this sort of advice is not considered universally inappropriate.

Why my husband didn't tell me NOT to wear a 2 piece bathing suit is beyond me.

For me, If I look like crap in my clothes - I _EXPECT_ my loved ones to point this out to me.

Ok. Fine. here is the argument.
"You need a bigger swim suit".
"Why? is this one too skimpy?"
"It just needs to be bigger."
"Is it too small? It doesn't feel tight. Does it look bad?"
"You Look disgusting in it!"
Soooo.... NO. Not much of an argument. Just his vague comments and me wondering what exactly was wrong the current swim suit. His jackassery was completely uncalled for. Also, I do expect that he could let me know if it was bad. But again, you can get these kinds of things across without being a jerk. He could have said something like "Maybe you should try that suit again after you lose a few more pounds". I was in the process of losing some weight. So that would not have offended me a bit.

calibriintx

My now husband, then boyfriend

This was the saddest part of the whole thing. I hope he was having some weird out of character *kitten*.hole moment and you're not still being subjected that. Haven't read all of the replies.

southern_star

I love the all time favorite, "I'm not saying you're fat".

BigCed77024

WOW! For those of you who have had to deal with idiots saying mean and hurtful things to you..i hope that you have used it as motivation!