My opinion (don't read if you're overly sensitive)

allisonlane61

I agree with you. its kind of like my sister in law saying I really need to quit smoking but..........
lists me the reasons why she can't quit doing it. I told her stop with the excuses and stop talking about it and do it already.
its like anything the people who make excuses to be honest I think they either don't want it bad enough to fight for it or they want a quick fix because they want to be lazy and not make the effort. I am losing this weight on my own. doing changes daily to help me do so. so far I lost 75 pounds. I started out at 250 pounds and a size 26. I am now 175 pounds and a size 14. 3 sizes away from my goal size. granted its been 2 1/2 years to reach this point but I got here.

Congratulations on losing those 75 pounds.

But what did you do on your way to those 250 pounds? Make excuses? Can you remember back to that? Did anyone's bullying you prompt you to lose those 75 or were you finally just ready to do that. We all run our own races, and just because someone is faster than us, doesn't mean we can catch up to them right away.

It kind of reminds me of the summer my daughter spent attempting to jump off a dock into two feet of water. She was maybe four years old, and she'd stand on the platform everyday (we used to go to a campground that summer). She'd make the motions of jumping, but just couldn't bring herself to do it. We clapped for her, told her nothing would happen, and finally, on the LAST DAY THE CAMP WAS OPEN that summer, she jumped!

I can guarantee you complaining to her and whining about her wouldn't have helped. We built up her confidence and self esteem. I believe this is the same premise.

Thewatcher_66

I agree with you. its kind of like my sister in law saying I really need to quit smoking but..........
lists me the reasons why she can't quit doing it. I told her stop with the excuses and stop talking about it and do it already.
its like anything the people who make excuses to be honest I think they either don't want it bad enough to fight for it or they want a quick fix because they want to be lazy and not make the effort. I am losing this weight on my own. doing changes daily to help me do so. so far I lost 75 pounds. I started out at 250 pounds and a size 26. I am now 175 pounds and a size 14. 3 sizes away from my goal size. granted its been 2 1/2 years to reach this point but I got here.

Congrats on your progress. Sounds like you've been making a lot of sacrifices and working hard. I will say that nicotine is an addiction and quitting is very hard; thanks in large part to a bunch of chicanery and unethical marketing practices used by the tobacco industry (another topic). A smoker probably needs a support group (probably more so than a dieter) to quit smoking because for some, it can be extremely hard. The best way to not get addicted is to not even start.

efirkey

I find it ironic that this post is in the Motivation and Support Board.

But I do agree with you on most of your points.

PaigeAnderson100

I have depression, bipolar disorder, body dysmorphic disorder and anxiety... I don't use them as excuses and I SUCK THEM UP long enough to work out and change my lifestyle.
Yeah, I am 19 years old and not as "experienced" as some of you but, it's common sense to stop with the bullspit excuses....


I didn't mean to come across as harsh about the depression thing, trust me... I got it.

dawningr

I do wonder how many excuses it takes to need to lose over 100 lbs?

We are all in some kind of path of fitness and health and some people are more ready than others. Just not sure why someone else's excuses should effect you so much.... Me, I focus on my goals and my commitment....I find it works much better.

Ditto. It's always easier to point fingers at other people, rather than yourself.

SpeSHul_SnoflEHk

I don't get why people are dismissing this young woman because she's only 19. I've read some of the dumbest material over the Internet from people who are much older. Just because a person is older than 30, does not make him/her wise. Legally, she's considered an adult and her opinions should be respected just as much as a person who is 40.

I happened to agree with most of what she wrote but I wll advise her to try to be more of a role model to her excuse-making friends instead of a critic. Either that or simply try to steer clear from them if they don't respect your efforts to become fit.

Please see her profile and her claims of maturity. You might agree with her -- but your approach actually IS mature.

Again, I probably would not have come across as harsh but to her point, I do grow tired of people who tend to waste my own time. For example, many of some of my friends swear up and down that they are looking to change their lifestyle and then they'll insist on meeting me at the park for a run.............................and not end up showing up.

If you look back -- a (hot) nurse posted the stages of coming to terms with making a life change --- wavering and weighing out pros and cons is a natural part of the process. I don't like people who don't honor their commitments either - but people have to get their themselves -- that means that they have to realize their excuses ARE excuses -- somebody else pointing it out and saying "get over it" isn't how a lot of people operate. Some do, admittedly, but I would guess those people are further in the process.

Oh. I didn't realize I duplicated a post. Is this hot nurse bigger than me?

poesch77

Your point is valid, don't get me wrong, but I'm pretty sure many of the people on this forum did that at some point. I certainly did. We don't all just get fat and then instantly swing into a healthy lifestyle without some hiccups. The people you complain about just haven't had that 'right, that's it' moment. Have some patience and help them if they need it.

agreed ^^^

holsieg

Sweetheart... You're 18. Do you really want to do this? I don't want to bash anyone, I was just like you and the OP when I was your age. I thought I was so mature... No.

Do I really want what? This is an unbelievable generalisation, and very much supports the point I was making, just like your attempt to patronise me by calling me 'sweetheart'

I'm laughing so hard right now because I said pretty much exactly the same thing, almost word for word, in a similar situation when was 18.
Now I'm 35 and look back and realize I had my head so far up my own backside that it's a miracle that I could hear my own voice, never mind enjoy it so much.

That doesn't mean that all young adults are like this. Like I said below, I know I won't convince you that many young adults are much more mature than their age would suggest.

This particular OP seems to thrive on the idea that she vary mature for her age (see her profile). In reality, mature people don't call out things that don't directly impact themselves in some way.

Yes, that is true and maybe she isn't. Although it's quite interesting that she has experienced depression in her life.

No one is saying young adults are uneducated and naive, but simply by virtue of life, inexperienced. You don't have the years or experiences to form judgments based on experiences. That's not to say your judgments are incorrect all the time, or correct all the time, but until certain things are lived, judgments are incomplete at best.

I agree, many young adults have little experience of the real world, yet some do. Everyone has incorrect judgements at time, and it's the generalisation that many older adults seem to have that I find the most upsetting. I know that I could say this a million times, and I will still be told statements like 'I'll understand when I'm older'. Reading some of these posts has made me sad, because the chances are that if I hadn't been honest about my age on my profile, my post would have been treated like the one below mine and considered an adult opinion.

I don't get why people are dismissing this young woman because she's only 19. I've read some of the dumbest material over the Internet from people who are much older. Just because a person is older than 30, does not make him/her wise. Legally, she's considered an adult and her opinions should be respected just as much as a person who is 40.
I happened to agree with most of what she wrote but I will advise her to try to be more of a role model to her excuse-making friends instead of a critic. Either that or simply try to steer clear from them if they don't respect your efforts to become fit.
Because the OP said some uneducated and naive things perhaps?

Thank you for saying this

allisonlane61

Your point is valid, don't get me wrong, but I'm pretty sure many of the people on this forum did that at some point. I certainly did. We don't all just get fat and then instantly swing into a healthy lifestyle without some hiccups. The people you complain about just haven't had that 'right, that's it' moment. Have some patience and help them if they need it.

agreed ^^^

It's actually difficult to hand-hold and help someone who isn't ready yet. It's far easier to just tell them to "suck it up."

younginaz

Yeah, but the rest of us would never have joined mfp at all if we weren't full of those same excuses at some point. I ate like a pig, didn't exercise, and whined about being fat. Now I'm here. We should try to remember that these excuse-filled people just aren't ready yet.

Well said!

Thewatcher_66

I have depression, bipolar disorder, body dysmorphic disorder and anxiety... I don't use them as excuses and I SUCK THEM UP long enough to work out and change my lifestyle.
Yeah, I am 19 years old and not as "experienced" as some of you but, it's common sense to stop with the bullspit excuses....


I didn't mean to come across as harsh about the depression thing, trust me... I got it.

That's great! You can probably become a role model to so many people......not just to 19 year olds but even to some of us old timers. keep up the good work.

SpeSHul_SnoflEHk

I don't get why people are dismissing this young woman because she's only 19. I've read some of the dumbest material over the Internet from people who are much older. Just because a person is older than 30, does not make him/her wise. Legally, she's considered an adult and her opinions should be respected just as much as a person who is 40.

I happened to agree with most of what she wrote but I wll advise her to try to be more of a role model to her excuse-making friends instead of a critic. Either that or simply try to steer clear from them if they don't respect your efforts to become fit.

Please see her profile and her claims of maturity. You might agree with her -- but your approach actually IS mature.

Again, I probably would not have come across as harsh but to her point, I do grow tired of people who tend to waste my own time. For example, many of some of my friends swear up and down that they are looking to change their lifestyle and then they'll insist on meeting me at the park for a run.............................and not end up showing up.

If you look back -- a (hot) nurse posted the stages of coming to terms with making a life change --- wavering and weighing out pros and cons is a natural part of the process. I don't like people who don't honor their commitments either - but people have to get their themselves -- that means that they have to realize their excuses ARE excuses -- somebody else pointing it out and saying "get over it" isn't how a lot of people operate. Some do, admittedly, but I would guess those people are further in the process.

Agreed. Pardon my ignorance here but what do y'all mean by OP? LOL

I'm sure someone beat me to it, but OP = original poster, who BTW I want to point out started this whole divisive mess and ran away ne'er to be heard from again.

devil_in_a_blue_dress

I have depression, bipolar disorder, body dysmorphic disorder and anxiety... I don't use them as excuses and I SUCK THEM UP long enough to work out and change my lifestyle.
Yeah, I am 19 years old and not as "experienced" as some of you but, it's common sense to stop with the bullspit excuses....


I didn't mean to come across as harsh about the depression thing, trust me... I got it.

allisonlane61

I don't get why people are dismissing this young woman because she's only 19. I've read some of the dumbest material over the Internet from people who are much older. Just because a person is older than 30, does not make him/her wise. Legally, she's considered an adult and her opinions should be respected just as much as a person who is 40.

I happened to agree with most of what she wrote but I wll advise her to try to be more of a role model to her excuse-making friends instead of a critic. Either that or simply try to steer clear from them if they don't respect your efforts to become fit.

Please see her profile and her claims of maturity. You might agree with her -- but your approach actually IS mature.

Again, I probably would not have come across as harsh but to her point, I do grow tired of people who tend to waste my own time. For example, many of some of my friends swear up and down that they are looking to change their lifestyle and then they'll insist on meeting me at the park for a run.............................and not end up showing up.

If you look back -- a (hot) nurse posted the stages of coming to terms with making a life change --- wavering and weighing out pros and cons is a natural part of the process. I don't like people who don't honor their commitments either - but people have to get their themselves -- that means that they have to realize their excuses ARE excuses -- somebody else pointing it out and saying "get over it" isn't how a lot of people operate. Some do, admittedly, but I would guess those people are further in the process.

Agreed. Pardon my ignorance here but what do y'all mean by OP? LOL

I'm sure someone beat me to it, but OP = original poster, who BTW I want to point out started this whole divisive mess and ran away ne'er to be heard from again.

Hurry, read faster. She did just pop in again to say "suck it up."

Shetchncn1

If you are not going to put in any effort into changing what you don't like then don't whine. Cus I have enough going on.

I get what you are saying

SpeSHul_SnoflEHk

Anh720- Thanks. It should have been obvious but sometimes I do ride on the short bus.

That's OK. so does she... MMRF!

jobrandes

Yup! Totally agree.

PaigeAnderson100

Oh and I didn't run away to never be heard from again. I have been at work and I worked out the second that I wrote this! I got 30+ friend requests from people thanking me for the post so, I am not going to apologize but, I will say that if you have something that you would like to bash me about or ask me- please message me!!! Thank!

hookilau

lol @ caring what other people do with their lives.

omg, right? :laugh: :laugh:

devil_in_a_blue_dress

I have depression, bipolar disorder, body dysmorphic disorder and anxiety... I don't use them as excuses and I SUCK THEM UP long enough to work out and change my lifestyle.
Yeah, I am 19 years old and not as "experienced" as some of you but, it's common sense to stop with the bullspit excuses....


I didn't mean to come across as harsh about the depression thing, trust me... I got it.

BOOTSTRAPS PEOPLE. BOOTSRAPS

tazminacat

Although many people are sick of hearing excuses for not getting healthy, especially when people have worked past their own and actually done something about it; it's what people do. Hell, I'll admit, I did it. I was diagnosed with RA, Fibromyalgia, a generalized anxiety disorder, on top of arthritis in my neck, shoulder and jaw, with a side serving of a herniated disc in my lower back. Now as much fun as it was just getting out of bed in the morning without screaming, crying or a string of swear words, the thought of going to a gym, going for a run/walk, or even throwing the tennis ball for my pup, just was NOT going to happen. Even with medications it was just too painful. Not to mention the fear of working out causing all my problems to bite me in the behind later that day or next morning. But when I saw myself go from 175lbs (which I was not happy with) to 203lbs (which I was even less happy with) I decided that my excuses and reasons for not getting off my butt had to stop. True, I don't eat 100% healthy. I like burgers and fries, and I don't cook well so yeah, I eat microwave food. But I get up, I go work out, I do what I can and I have managed to actually lose weight.

What happened with me, started with me. If my brother, or friends told me, "just work through the pain, just suck it up" ..well first I would of throat punched them for being insensitive when they have no idea how it feels to have a 90 year old body at 31.... and second, it wouldn't have origniated with my own desires and determination... rendering it useless advice.

People don't work out or lose weight for other people. Whether at 125 lbs or 500 lbs, it has to be their own final straw that gets them doing what they need to do.

Some people are interested in helping, others are "sick of hearing excuses"; either way, their words should not effect your life, and you should not infect their lives with your words. Just sayin' =^.^=

KANGOOJUMPS

yeah,,, I HATE WHINERS.

devil_in_a_blue_dress

Oh and I didn't run away to never be heard from again. I have been at work and I worked out the second that I wrote this! I got 30+ friend requests from people thanking me for the post so, I am not going to apologize but, I will say that if you have something that you would like to bash me about or ask me- please message me!!! Thank!

Even if you did ...

So_Much_Fab

Oh and I didn't run away to never be heard from again. I have been at work and I worked out the second that I wrote this!

EXCUSES!!!!

devil_in_a_blue_dress

Anh720- Thanks. It should have been obvious but sometimes I do ride on the short bus.

That's OK. so does she... MMRF!

Word.

Jocosase

Very well said. Sometimes, a little kick in the butt is good to get back in the right frame of mind. Not offended at all.

devil_in_a_blue_dress

Oh and I didn't run away to never be heard from again. I have been at work and I worked out the second that I wrote this!

EXCUSES!!!!

ahahahahhahahah!

atamrowski

I am so sick of hearing dumb excuses from people who "really want and need to lose the weight". If I had a dollar for everytime someone complained about something or had an excuse as to why they can't work out or eat right that day- I would have enough money for a gym membership to 17 different gyms all over the country AND enough money to fly to each one 23 times a day!

"I can't work out. I live in an apartment and I would disturb people"
"I can't work out. I don't have a gym membership"
"I can't eat healthy. I don't have any food"
"I feel so depressed. I can't work out"
"I don't have enough money to get a gym membership"
"I don't have any motivation"
"What's the point?"
"I am too busy"
Those are only a few of the excuses and complaints that I hear on a daily basis whether it be on the site or someone in my family or a close friend? You know what I have to say to all of these? -
"Talk to the people below you. If they don't like It, too bad"
"Work out at home"
"Go buy some food or make something healthy. There are plenty of healthy dishes that can be done on $10"
"Suck it up"
"You don't need one"
"Find it and than give me a call"
"The point is, you're fat"
"I am busy too. Talk to you after I work out"

Seriously. Everyone has their "days" but, when a friend posts how crappy their life is, how busy they are and how poor they are- I don't feel bad. You can still use your own body weight to work out and you can lose weight. Eat the crap food than but, learn portion control. If you find yourself saying "what's the point" or "I don't want to" than, you're right! You really don't want to lose the weight, you want it to accumulate, you want to get larger and you want to have health issues. If you see yourself looking in the mirror and seeing something gross, do something about it. Cut the crap, enough with the excuses and get off of your *kitten*!!!

I am sorry if this offends someone but, if it offends you- take my advice. I am sure there will be a lot of other's who also cannot stand the daily excuses with people. What do you want us to say? Eventually, I am going to end up giving up on your dreams since you can't even reach for your dreams! Sorry if I sound "witchy" but, this is real life- you can't live a happy and healthy life if you aren't happy and healthy. YOU are the only one that can do this. Suck it up, put the donut down and do some push ups!!! Make today great, everyone!

Wow. Just wow. Way to be motivational and supportive. Dismissing and minimizing others problems is very supportive and motivational. You are a virtual paragon of compassion and empathy for your friends. Are you looking for the strike by setting up a divisive topic on purpose, or does this just come naturally to you?

And in case you missed it,

Yeah. Excuses suck. I try to never miss a gym day, and I try to eat healthy. Sometimes, my friends don't. I don't attack them and dismiss their feelings and problems. I help them find a way to overcome them.

Next, I am going to assume you are young and naive. You obviously don't have a lot of real world experience. You probably have never had to deal with spiteful neighbors, or threats of eviction from being disturbing of your neighbors.
You probably have never had to deal with going hungry because you don't have a support network, or a job, or you have other competing priorities that take your money (like home repairs, car repairs, mortgages, etc) that leave you without a lot of money for groceries leaving you only crappy choices like processed non nutritive crap food.

You obviously have no idea what mental illness or depression is like. A person who is truly depressed does not just have a little sadness, and can't just "suck it up and get over it." Depression is crippling, and it takes therapy and likely medication. People who are depressed can barely get out of bed. Did you know that many people who start on anti-depressants kill themselves, or attempt to kill themselves after they are medicated. Do you know why? The reason why is that they have wanted to kill themselves for a long time, but didn't have the energy or motivation to do so until they were medicated, and began to feel good enough to follow through on their plans. Just think of the depth of how little they can accomplish if this is the case.

here is a suggestion, if you don't like your friends excuses, delete them. You obviously don't give a siht about them anyway. Dont' start a rant about them. Just STFU!

This

Yep.

Edited to add: And I've read some comments mentioning her age. I don't care, I haven't even checked her profile. As previously said, many people my age and older are complete idiots. Now, whatever age this lady is, she has no understanding of a lot of serious things in life. Unfortunately, ignorance is not an excuse, and kindness goes further than criticism. Sweetheart, woman up.

Edited to add as well: I agree with all the above! Sure there are excuses to just prevent the change you are seeking (some people are scared of change) but there are excuses that are just plain ole valid. If THEIR excuses are not interfering with your own goals and progress, then ignore the blah blah coming from their mouths. Worry about yourself. And blasting those family/friends on here doesn't give you much character.

PaigeAnderson100

Oh and I didn't run away to never be heard from again. I have been at work and I worked out the second that I wrote this! I got 30+ friend requests from people thanking me for the post so, I am not going to apologize but, I will say that if you have something that you would like to bash me about or ask me- please message me!!! Thank!

Even if you did ...

Good thing I didn't plan on it.

allisonlane61

yeah,,, I HATE WHINERS.

Which kind? The whiners or the whiners about the whiners?