My opinion (don't read if you're overly sensitive)

fayeonherway

So I read your OP. I feel like I'm being punished for being an imperfect human and I should just end it right now....

Or am I being too sensitive?

I'd like to apologize on behalf of the OP and several others who think exercise is the ultimate cure for all types of depression. I guess physically fit/active people who suffer from depression are unicorns or something. Please don't just stop taking your meds and if you feel the need to, please consult your doctor.

CCusedtodance

Yeah, but the rest of us would never have joined mfp at all if we weren't full of those same excuses at some point. I ate like a pig, didn't exercise, and whined about being fat. Now I'm here. We should try to remember that these excuse-filled people just aren't ready yet.

^^^^^^THIS! Not everyone is ready and as most know, you cannot convince someone to lose weight or workout until they are.

Toomanytwinkies

I agree with a lot of what you are saying except for anything having to do with depression or a true sickness. We all have different things going on in our lives and we all have different circumstances. What works for one person may not be the best for someone else. I can't stand excuses, outright, but when a person truly has a circumstance that keeps them down, that is just them venting and maybe they just are not ready to be in the place that you are or many others are. I do find it a bit rude that anyone would want to point this fact out, openly. Sometimes we, and that includes me, need to monitor what comes out of our mouthes. Try and remember that not everyone is you and you have no idea why that person is having a bad day or has that excuse. Everyone uses them at some point and time, so honestly, if someone doesn't like seeing them then just don't friend that person or ignore it.

This is such a good post. You can't group everyone together like that. Some people have eating addictions, depression, very low self esteem and so on. I know people who just grind your nerves and really need to just put in an effort. On the flip side, others are truly suffering, not just complaining.

emrogers

I agree. There's lots of excuses being made and if they spent that much time doing something about it then they'd actually see progress. However, I think that most of us have been there and done that! I know I have for sure! I also don't cut for that BS if they're my friends. I'm sorry, but I want positive and the "I can do this attitude, even if I fall down"

I don't even bother reading those posts where ppl are whining and complaining. I have my own issues to deal with and can't handle it. So, if you don't like it, don't read it. This journey is definitely not for the weak minded fore sure!

jlapey

"When someone is truly ready to make a change, they will find a way, until then they will find excuses."

ETA: I guess the trick for people like the OP is learning to distinguish an "excuse" from a legitimate "reason". Although they may sound an awful lot a like, they are very different.
Also, we've all been there, I spent years making excuses for myself, weight loss is as much mental as it is physical. Instead of being annoyed, be supportive and remember what it was like before you were 'ready'.

SpeSHul_SnoflEHk

I am so sick of hearing dumb excuses from people who "really want and need to lose the weight". If I had a dollar for everytime someone complained about something or had an excuse as to why they can't work out or eat right that day- I would have enough money for a gym membership to 17 different gyms all over the country AND enough money to fly to each one 23 times a day!

"I can't work out. I live in an apartment and I would disturb people"
"I can't work out. I don't have a gym membership"
"I can't eat healthy. I don't have any food"
"I feel so depressed. I can't work out"
"I don't have enough money to get a gym membership"
"I don't have any motivation"
"What's the point?"
"I am too busy"
Those are only a few of the excuses and complaints that I hear on a daily basis whether it be on the site or someone in my family or a close friend? You know what I have to say to all of these? -
"Talk to the people below you. If they don't like It, too bad"
"Work out at home"
"Go buy some food or make something healthy. There are plenty of healthy dishes that can be done on $10"
"Suck it up"
"You don't need one"
"Find it and than give me a call"
"The point is, you're fat"
"I am busy too. Talk to you after I work out"

Seriously. Everyone has their "days" but, when a friend posts how crappy their life is, how busy they are and how poor they are- I don't feel bad. You can still use your own body weight to work out and you can lose weight. Eat the crap food than but, learn portion control. If you find yourself saying "what's the point" or "I don't want to" than, you're right! You really don't want to lose the weight, you want it to accumulate, you want to get larger and you want to have health issues. If you see yourself looking in the mirror and seeing something gross, do something about it. Cut the crap, enough with the excuses and get off of your *kitten*!!!

I am sorry if this offends someone but, if it offends you- take my advice. I am sure there will be a lot of other's who also cannot stand the daily excuses with people. What do you want us to say? Eventually, I am going to end up giving up on your dreams since you can't even reach for your dreams! Sorry if I sound "witchy" but, this is real life- you can't live a happy and healthy life if you aren't happy and healthy. YOU are the only one that can do this. Suck it up, put the donut down and do some push ups!!! Make today great, everyone!

Wow. Just wow. Way to be motivational and supportive. Dismissing and minimizing others problems is very supportive and motivational. You are a virtual paragon of compassion and empathy for your friends. Are you looking for the strike by setting up a divisive topic on purpose, or does this just come naturally to you?

And in case you missed it,

Yeah. Excuses suck. I try to never miss a gym day, and I try to eat healthy. Sometimes, my friends don't. I don't attack them and dismiss their feelings and problems. I help them find a way to overcome them.

Next, I am going to assume you are young and naive. You obviously don't have a lot of real world experience. You probably have never had to deal with spiteful neighbors, or threats of eviction from being disturbing of your neighbors.
You probably have never had to deal with going hungry because you don't have a support network, or a job, or you have other competing priorities that take your money (like home repairs, car repairs, mortgages, etc) that leave you without a lot of money for groceries leaving you only crappy choices like processed non nutritive crap food.

You obviously have no idea what mental illness or depression is like. A person who is truly depressed does not just have a little sadness, and can't just "suck it up and get over it." Depression is crippling, and it takes therapy and likely medication. People who are depressed can barely get out of bed. Did you know that many people who start on anti-depressants kill themselves, or attempt to kill themselves after they are medicated. Do you know why? The reason why is that they have wanted to kill themselves for a long time, but didn't have the energy or motivation to do so until they were medicated, and began to feel good enough to follow through on their plans. Just think of the depth of how little they can accomplish if this is the case.

here is a suggestion, if you don't like your friends excuses, delete them. You obviously don't give a siht about them anyway. Dont' start a rant about them. Just STFU!

quirkytizzy

Wow. Just wow. Way to be motivational and supportive. Dismissing and minimizing others problems is very supportive and motivational. You are a virtual paragon of compassion and empathy for your friends. Are you looking for the strike by setting up a divisive topic on purpose, or does this just come naturally to you?

And in case you missed it,

Yeah. Excuses suck. I try to never miss a gym day, and I try to eat healthy. Sometimes, my friends don't. I don't attack them and dismiss their feelings and problems. I help them find a way to overcome them.

Next, I am going to assume you are young and naive. You obviously don't have a lot of real world experience. You probably have never had to deal with spiteful neighbors, or threats of eviction from being disturbing of your neighbors.
You probably have never had to deal with going hungry because you don't have a support network, or a job, or you have other competing priorities that take your money (like home repairs, car repairs, mortgages, etc) that leave you without a lot of money for groceries leaving you only crappy choices like processed non nutritive crap food.

You obviously have no idea what mental illness or depression is like. A person who is truly depressed does not just have a little sadness, and can't just "suck it up and get over it." Depression is crippling, and it takes therapy and likely medication. People who are depressed can barely get out of bed. Did you know that many people who start on anti-depressants kill themselves, or attempt to kill themselves after they are medicated. Do you know why? The reason why is that they have wanted to kill themselves for a long time, but didn't have the energy or motivation to do so until they were medicated, and began to feel good enough to follow through on their plans. Just think of the depth of how little they can accomplish if this is the case.

here is a suggestion, if you don't like your friends excuses, delete them. You obviously don't give a siht about them anyway. Dont' start a rant about them. Just STFU!

I like you.

Jayne19099

I am so sick of hearing dumb excuses from people who "really want and need to lose the weight". If I had a dollar for everytime someone complained about something or had an excuse as to why they can't work out or eat right that day- I would have enough money for a gym membership to 17 different gyms all over the country AND enough money to fly to each one 23 times a day!

"I can't work out. I live in an apartment and I would disturb people"
"I can't work out. I don't have a gym membership"
"I can't eat healthy. I don't have any food"
"I feel so depressed. I can't work out"
"I don't have enough money to get a gym membership"
"I don't have any motivation"
"What's the point?"
"I am too busy"
Those are only a few of the excuses and complaints that I hear on a daily basis whether it be on the site or someone in my family or a close friend? You know what I have to say to all of these? -
"Talk to the people below you. If they don't like It, too bad"
"Work out at home"
"Go buy some food or make something healthy. There are plenty of healthy dishes that can be done on $10"
"Suck it up"
"You don't need one"
"Find it and than give me a call"
"The point is, you're fat"
"I am busy too. Talk to you after I work out"

Seriously. Everyone has their "days" but, when a friend posts how crappy their life is, how busy they are and how poor they are- I don't feel bad. You can still use your own body weight to work out and you can lose weight. Eat the crap food than but, learn portion control. If you find yourself saying "what's the point" or "I don't want to" than, you're right! You really don't want to lose the weight, you want it to accumulate, you want to get larger and you want to have health issues. If you see yourself looking in the mirror and seeing something gross, do something about it. Cut the crap, enough with the excuses and get off of your *kitten*!!!

I am sorry if this offends someone but, if it offends you- take my advice. I am sure there will be a lot of other's who also cannot stand the daily excuses with people. What do you want us to say? Eventually, I am going to end up giving up on your dreams since you can't even reach for your dreams! Sorry if I sound "witchy" but, this is real life- you can't live a happy and healthy life if you aren't happy and healthy. YOU are the only one that can do this. Suck it up, put the donut down and do some push ups!!! Make today great, everyone!

Depression is a illness caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain. I have read that people who have diagnosed depression, ie people who have chemical imbalances, can actually be harmed by exercise as exercise can deplete the person's already low serotonin levels and cause them to become more depressed. (serotonin is a chemical involved in transmitting signals between nerve endings). When someone says they are too depressed to work out it would be better to suggest they see a doctor as they will never actually be able to "suck it up" due to lack of brain chemicals.

sheldonz42

Come back and talk to me about depression after you have buried a child. Same goes for the diet and exercise helping depression posters.

Jayne19099

Wow. Just wow. Way to be motivational and supportive. Dismissing and minimizing others problems is very supportive and motivational. You are a virtual paragon of compassion and empathy for your friends. Are you looking for the strike by setting up a divisive topic on purpose, or does this just come naturally to you?

And in case you missed it,

Yeah. Excuses suck. I try to never miss a gym day, and I try to eat healthy. Sometimes, my friends don't. I don't attack them and dismiss their feelings and problems. I help them find a way to overcome them.

Next, I am going to assume you are young and naive. You obviously don't have a lot of real world experience. You probably have never had to deal with spiteful neighbors, or threats of eviction from being disturbing of your neighbors.
You probably have never had to deal with going hungry because you don't have a support network, or a job, or you have other competing priorities that take your money (like home repairs, car repairs, mortgages, etc) that leave you without a lot of money for groceries leaving you only crappy choices like processed non nutritive crap food.

You obviously have no idea what mental illness or depression is like. A person who is truly depressed does not just have a little sadness, and can't just "suck it up and get over it." Depression is crippling, and it takes therapy and likely medication. People who are depressed can barely get out of bed. Did you know that many people who start on anti-depressants kill themselves, or attempt to kill themselves after they are medicated. Do you know why? The reason why is that they have wanted to kill themselves for a long time, but didn't have the energy or motivation to do so until they were medicated, and began to feel good enough to follow through on their plans. Just think of the depth of how little they can accomplish if this is the case.

here is a suggestion, if you don't like your friends excuses, delete them. You obviously don't give a siht about them anyway. Dont' start a rant about them. Just STFU!

I like you.

Me too.

verptwerp

Your point is valid, don't get me wrong, but I'm pretty sure many of the people on this forum did that at some point. I certainly did. We don't all just get fat and then instantly swing into a healthy lifestyle without some hiccups. The people you complain about just haven't had that 'right, that's it' moment. Have some patience and help them if they need it.

And at some point they have to put down the bag of chips, get off the recliner and do something to help themselves ....... life is too short to constantly have to coddle husbands (ooops, I mean people) who just like to whine ....... maybe NOT coddling them anymore will actually get THROUGH to them

jonnythan

Just my opinion, and you shouldn't read it if you're overly sensitive, but this is sanctimonious bullpoo.

It's very true that people make excuses all the time. But I find it hilarious when people start calling others out on it, when it's obvious from their very presence on this site that they only just stopped making excuses themselves. Especially when so many of us will be back on the couch within 12 months eating ice cream from a gallon bucket.

Three months of healthy eating and gym-going does not give you judgment rights on others.

I JUST STOPPED MAKING EXCUSES SO ALL THE PEOPLE MAKING EXCUSES ARE LAAAAAAAAAAME

devil_in_a_blue_dress

Wow. Just wow. Way to be motivational and supportive. Dismissing and minimizing others problems is very supportive and motivational. You are a virtual paragon of compassion and empathy for your friends. Are you looking for the strike by setting up a divisive topic on purpose, or does this just come naturally to you?

And in case you missed it,

Yeah. Excuses suck. I try to never miss a gym day, and I try to eat healthy. Sometimes, my friends don't. I don't attack them and dismiss their feelings and problems. I help them find a way to overcome them.

Next, I am going to assume you are young and naive. You obviously don't have a lot of real world experience. You probably have never had to deal with spiteful neighbors, or threats of eviction from being disturbing of your neighbors.
You probably have never had to deal with going hungry because you don't have a support network, or a job, or you have other competing priorities that take your money (like home repairs, car repairs, mortgages, etc) that leave you without a lot of money for groceries leaving you only crappy choices like processed non nutritive crap food.

You obviously have no idea what mental illness or depression is like. A person who is truly depressed does not just have a little sadness, and can't just "suck it up and get over it." Depression is crippling, and it takes therapy and likely medication. People who are depressed can barely get out of bed. Did you know that many people who start on anti-depressants kill themselves, or attempt to kill themselves after they are medicated. Do you know why? The reason why is that they have wanted to kill themselves for a long time, but didn't have the energy or motivation to do so until they were medicated, and began to feel good enough to follow through on their plans. Just think of the depth of how little they can accomplish if this is the case.

here is a suggestion, if you don't like your friends excuses, delete them. You obviously don't give a siht about them anyway. Dont' start a rant about them. Just STFU!

I like you.

Me too.

Me most.

cmacphee3

You obviously have no idea what mental illness or depression is like. A person who is truly depressed does not just have a little sadness, and can't just "suck it up and get over it." Depression is crippling, and it takes therapy and likely medication. People who are depressed can barely get out of bed. Did you know that many people who start on anti-depressants kill themselves, or attempt to kill themselves after they are medicated. Do you know why? The reason why is that they have wanted to kill themselves for a long time, but didn't have the energy or motivation to do so until they were medicated, and began to feel good enough to follow through on their plans. Just think of the depth of how little they can accomplish if this is the case.

This.

JeneticTraining

I understand.
Those people do need a wakeup call.
I do believe that some people turn to MFP because they have no one else to turn to(for a variety of reasons).
I love helping people out and getting them started.

TaintedVampyre

Aside from telling someone who is depressed to "suck it up", I agree with it all.

^^ This comment ^^

cmacphee3

Come back and talk to me about depression after you have buried a child. Same goes for the diet and exercise helping depression posters.

I am so sorry, that is one of the worst things anyone can experience.

derekj222

Couldn't agree more...I start deleting friends when I notice these behaviors. My favorite was "my shampoo and hair products are effecting my weight loss"

sheldonz42

Come back and talk to me about depression after you have buried a child. Same goes for the diet and exercise helping depression posters.

I am so sorry, that is one of the worst things anyone can experience.

Thanks. And yes I think it has to be among the worst things in the world.

Nerdphiliac

Great motivational tiraid, mate!
I liked it, thanks for the support!

(Don't listen to what some others say... This site is loaded with bullies, it's pathetic really.)

Wystaria

I do wonder how many excuses it takes to need to lose over 100 lbs?

We are all in some kind of path of fitness and health and some people are more ready than others. Just not sure why someone else's excuses should effect you so much.... Me, I focus on my goals and my commitment....I find it works much better.

quirkytizzy

Great motivational tiraid, mate!
I liked it, thanks for the support!

(Don't listen to what some others say... This site is loaded with bullies, it's pathetic really.)

I would say someone telling me my depression isn't real and that I just have to suck it up is closer to bullying than not.

We're not the ones telling her that her struggles aren't valid enough to warrant consideration.

Mr_Bad_Example

I am so sick of hearing dumb excuses from people who "really want and need to lose the weight". If I had a dollar for everytime someone complained about something or had an excuse as to why they can't work out or eat right that day- I would have enough money for a gym membership to 17 different gyms all over the country AND enough money to fly to each one 23 times a day!

"I can't work out. I live in an apartment and I would disturb people"
"I can't work out. I don't have a gym membership"
"I can't eat healthy. I don't have any food"
"I feel so depressed. I can't work out"
"I don't have enough money to get a gym membership"
"I don't have any motivation"
"What's the point?"
"I am too busy"
Those are only a few of the excuses and complaints that I hear on a daily basis whether it be on the site or someone in my family or a close friend? You know what I have to say to all of these? -
"Talk to the people below you. If they don't like It, too bad"
"Work out at home"
"Go buy some food or make something healthy. There are plenty of healthy dishes that can be done on $10"
"Suck it up"
"You don't need one"
"Find it and than give me a call"
"The point is, you're fat"
"I am busy too. Talk to you after I work out"

Seriously. Everyone has their "days" but, when a friend posts how crappy their life is, how busy they are and how poor they are- I don't feel bad. You can still use your own body weight to work out and you can lose weight. Eat the crap food than but, learn portion control. If you find yourself saying "what's the point" or "I don't want to" than, you're right! You really don't want to lose the weight, you want it to accumulate, you want to get larger and you want to have health issues. If you see yourself looking in the mirror and seeing something gross, do something about it. Cut the crap, enough with the excuses and get off of your *kitten*!!!

I am sorry if this offends someone but, if it offends you- take my advice. I am sure there will be a lot of other's who also cannot stand the daily excuses with people. What do you want us to say? Eventually, I am going to end up giving up on your dreams since you can't even reach for your dreams! Sorry if I sound "witchy" but, this is real life- you can't live a happy and healthy life if you aren't happy and healthy. YOU are the only one that can do this. Suck it up, put the donut down and do some push ups!!! Make today great, everyone!

Spoken like a true 19 year old. Grow up, honey, and stop whining about other people.

devil_in_a_blue_dress

Great motivational tiraid, mate!
I liked it, thanks for the support!

(Don't listen to what some others say... This site is loaded with bullies, it's pathetic really.)

Yep, people suggesting compassion, rather than asserting that they are superior because they "don't make excuses" is totally bullying.

TerriAnne53

Yes, so agree with the first post. We are all responsible for what we do, eat, exercise etc. I also just skip past those posts. Only "I" can look after "ME"

devil_in_a_blue_dress

I am so sick of hearing dumb excuses from people who "really want and need to lose the weight". If I had a dollar for everytime someone complained about something or had an excuse as to why they can't work out or eat right that day- I would have enough money for a gym membership to 17 different gyms all over the country AND enough money to fly to each one 23 times a day!

"I can't work out. I live in an apartment and I would disturb people"
"I can't work out. I don't have a gym membership"
"I can't eat healthy. I don't have any food"
"I feel so depressed. I can't work out"
"I don't have enough money to get a gym membership"
"I don't have any motivation"
"What's the point?"
"I am too busy"
Those are only a few of the excuses and complaints that I hear on a daily basis whether it be on the site or someone in my family or a close friend? You know what I have to say to all of these? -
"Talk to the people below you. If they don't like It, too bad"
"Work out at home"
"Go buy some food or make something healthy. There are plenty of healthy dishes that can be done on $10"
"Suck it up"
"You don't need one"
"Find it and than give me a call"
"The point is, you're fat"
"I am busy too. Talk to you after I work out"

Seriously. Everyone has their "days" but, when a friend posts how crappy their life is, how busy they are and how poor they are- I don't feel bad. You can still use your own body weight to work out and you can lose weight. Eat the crap food than but, learn portion control. If you find yourself saying "what's the point" or "I don't want to" than, you're right! You really don't want to lose the weight, you want it to accumulate, you want to get larger and you want to have health issues. If you see yourself looking in the mirror and seeing something gross, do something about it. Cut the crap, enough with the excuses and get off of your *kitten*!!!

I am sorry if this offends someone but, if it offends you- take my advice. I am sure there will be a lot of other's who also cannot stand the daily excuses with people. What do you want us to say? Eventually, I am going to end up giving up on your dreams since you can't even reach for your dreams! Sorry if I sound "witchy" but, this is real life- you can't live a happy and healthy life if you aren't happy and healthy. YOU are the only one that can do this. Suck it up, put the donut down and do some push ups!!! Make today great, everyone!

Spoken like a true 19 year old. Grow up, honey, and stop whining about other people.

Never knew you were the overly sensitive type...

RunHardBeStrong

Yeah, but the rest of us would never have joined mfp at all if we weren't full of those same excuses at some point. I ate like a pig, didn't exercise, and whined about being fat. Now I'm here. We should try to remember that these excuse-filled people just aren't ready yet.

Agreed. Everyone starts somewhere and until they decide to take that step, there will be excuses. I believe most of can understand this because a lot of us have been that person.

tricelive

Love the mantra:


"You can make excuses, or you can make progress."

Like!

squatsandlipgloss

Wow. Just wow. Way to be motivational and supportive. Dismissing and minimizing others problems is very supportive and motivational. You are a virtual paragon of compassion and empathy for your friends. Are you looking for the strike by setting up a divisive topic on purpose, or does this just come naturally to you?

And in case you missed it,

Yeah. Excuses suck. I try to never miss a gym day, and I try to eat healthy. Sometimes, my friends don't. I don't attack them and dismiss their feelings and problems. I help them find a way to overcome them.

Next, I am going to assume you are young and naive. You obviously don't have a lot of real world experience. You probably have never had to deal with spiteful neighbors, or threats of eviction from being disturbing of your neighbors.
You probably have never had to deal with going hungry because you don't have a support network, or a job, or you have other competing priorities that take your money (like home repairs, car repairs, mortgages, etc) that leave you without a lot of money for groceries leaving you only crappy choices like processed non nutritive crap food.

You obviously have no idea what mental illness or depression is like. A person who is truly depressed does not just have a little sadness, and can't just "suck it up and get over it." Depression is crippling, and it takes therapy and likely medication. People who are depressed can barely get out of bed. Did you know that many people who start on anti-depressants kill themselves, or attempt to kill themselves after they are medicated. Do you know why? The reason why is that they have wanted to kill themselves for a long time, but didn't have the energy or motivation to do so until they were medicated, and began to feel good enough to follow through on their plans. Just think of the depth of how little they can accomplish if this is the case.

here is a suggestion, if you don't like your friends excuses, delete them. You obviously don't give a siht about them anyway. Dont' start a rant about them. Just STFU!

I like you.

Me too.

Me three. Sad, sad thread...

holsieg

Depression is a illness caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain. I have read that people who have diagnosed depression, ie people who have chemical imbalances, can actually be harmed by exercise as exercise can deplete the person's already low serotonin levels and cause them to become more depressed. (serotonin is a chemical involved in transmitting signals between nerve endings). When someone says they are too depressed to work out it would be better to suggest they see a doctor as they will never actually be able to "suck it up" due to lack of brain chemicals.

Yeah, although going to get professional help is obviously the best solution, I have read some interesting studies which suggest that exercise can be more effective than drugs. I'm not trying to debate with you, but may I see your source (I'm interested in biology and psychology and always like reading new evidence). I'll show you some of mine: http://curetogether.com/blog/2012/02/15/bipolar-managed-best-without-drugs-227-patients-report/
http://www.health.harvard.edu/newsweek/Exercise-and-Depression-report-excerpt.htm

All exercise should be done with clinical supervision in the case of depression, but there are some interesting studies out there. I was surprised at the idea that small, frequent meals can help to control bipolar disorder, and yoga (although with the increasing evidence that mindfulness therapies are effective, maybe it's not so surprising!)

Of course, telling a depressed individual to 'just suck it up' is like telling someone with Bulimia to 'just stop purging' or someone with OCD to 'stop having compulsive thoughts', or someone with a social phobia to 'just go to a few parties'. Ignorance when it comes to mental health genuinely upsets me, and I hope it changes soon.