Why do people say men and women can't be platonic friends?

pastryari

I was more referring to those people(like yourself) who DENY that men can't be friends with women without desiring them. The denial is what creates the facade. The facade is what destroys the reality.

Yes?

Please quote where I ever said the bolded part, please. You won't be able to, because I never said that.

I said that men and women can be attracted but I didn't care as long as they didn't act on it. To me, that means the relationship is platonic.

Just quoting again to see if I get a response showing me where I supposedly said something...

If you don't understand how those statements answer each other, I don't know how else to explain it.

So you're admitting that you made that up? K, just checking.

foxro

We are surrounded in a natural eco-system that breathes sex. As the creator said, go forth and multiply. This notion pexplexes the athiests. Men and women are meant to be together, but once together, true to each other. Sex is the bond, the love, the trust. Sure men and women can be friends, but we are driven to love, go on, and have kids. Nothing wrong with that at all. Gay folks the same, the need for trust and bonding. So who wants to fight me on this...putim up :laugh:

:noway: :noway: :noway: :noway: :noway: :noway: :noway: Some of my guy friends are like brothers. It would be incestuous. Your narrowminded view disgusts me.

You don#t get it. There is no morality intended. All it is like the animals and birds and bees sex is natural and part of our biology that we cannot get rid of. That#s all, no morality intended, just biology. The difference is we have a choice of mates. Cripes sorry for being mechanical about it. I didn#t say to be incestuous. You did !!!!

drchimpanzee

Of course men and women can be platonic friends and I'll bang any girl that says different!!!

magerum

Just curious, not sure if anyone has asked this, but are the buttons on your shirt broken?

devil_in_a_blue_dress

I have totally platonic guy friends. I also have also had guy friends that I wasn't romantically interested in but had sex with. For me, it's entirely possible.

quirkytizzy

Just curious, not sure if anyone has asked this, but are the buttons on your shirt broken?

He doesn't have a bouncy, bouncy rack. It counts as tastefully covered.

arcaneshadowcat

Men and women can be friends. I am socially awkward and a gamer, so for most of my life, most of my friends were male. It probably helps that I am oblivious unless flirting is quite obvious. With that being said, currently I have more female friends, and most of them are homosexuals or bisexuals. Seeing as my 'gaydar' is broken, this was not intentional, it is just how things turned out. I moved over a 1000 miles from anyone I knew to go to graduate school, so my normal set of friends are back home and I set out making new friends. I am slow socially to make friends and acquaintances, so I cherish the friends that I make and try to make said friendships beneficial, as relationships don't last if you are a leech or emotional drain on those around you. I do have to say that during some pretty rough times, it was my guy friends who helped me get perspective and reality as my female friends are more empathic generally. It is my opinion that platonic friendships whether with men or women require both parties to be oblivious to the other individuals sex, but a number of my friends are open sexually in a manner that is slightly scary to me, but they are able to maintain friendships and sleep every now and again with said friends. It just shows that relationship complexities are available in many flavors and terribly subjective to how onlookers perceive the relationship.

lotushead

After reading many of the comments in here from men.... How do I even go on living my life thinking all the men I meet just want to bang me? That's horrible! Can't be right. Right?

foxro

After reading many of the comments in here from men.... How do I even go on living my life thinking all the men I meet just want to bang me? That's horrible! Can't be right. Right?

Good for you, after some of the feedback I#ve had to my posts and others postsI#m beginning to think there is no good reason for men and women or gays to be together for any reason:laugh:

DalekBrittany

One of my BFFs happens to be a male. He has been friends of my fiance since they were in middle school and when we met we became friends. Now we are closer and hang out together often. I have noooooo sexual attraction to him whatsoever (I think I just threw up in my mouth thinking about that.) As far as I am concerned, we are platonic friends. However, that does not mean there's no attraction on his end (though I seriously doubt there is.) I think we can never really know because it requires both parties being honest with each other and themselves.

veggiehottie

To be honest, I don't think men and women can be friends w/o there being some kind of feelings (sexual, romantic, etc.) involved.

Sure, you can be platonic and never act on those feelings. But I have never had a guy friend where neither side had some level of interest.

RandiLandCHANGED

After reading many of the comments in here from men.... How do I even go on living my life thinking all the men I meet just want to bang me? That's horrible! Can't be right. Right?

My thoughts exactly!

Sepa

I was just best (wo)man at my male friends wedding. His new wife and my fiancee was both happy with it being that way. Neither of us fancy each other so yes men and women can be just friends. Although, not sure which way this strengthens the answer (as i have been with my financee for 8 years and he his wife for 5) but we were a couple when we were much younger. Either way, now, we are just very good friends

lotushead

After reading many of the comments in here from men.... How do I even go on living my life thinking all the men I meet just want to bang me? That's horrible! Can't be right. Right?

My thoughts exactly!

I can see how you would relate to what I said. You're gorg! But I mean I don't want to be ignorant either though, you know? I guess naturally I treat each man on a case by case basis. I never assume they just want to sleep with me right off the bat because they have a penis. But after reading all this, maybe I should think that way!! They're all openly admitting it. lol

RandiLandCHANGED

After reading many of the comments in here from men.... How do I even go on living my life thinking all the men I meet just want to bang me? That's horrible! Can't be right. Right?

My thoughts exactly!

I can see how you would relate to what I said. You're gorg! But I mean I don't want to be ignorant either though, you know? I guess naturally I treat each man on a case by case basis. I never assume they just want to sleep with me right off the bat because they have a penis. But after reading all this, maybe I should think that way!! They're all openly admitting it. lol

Thank you. So are you I have friend zoned guys who definitely wanted to be more than friends. One stands out in particular.It ruined the friendship when they told me the truth and I was pretty crushed to lose that friendship. However, I have also been married since I was 18 so I don't often wind up in that sitution as most of the guys I've met don't want to be friends with a married chick.

Tuffjourney

Apparently I need more male friends.:ohwell:

fitfreakymom

There is some misinformation here... From the male side of things. She does not even have to be attractive. Sorry its true.

Nice. True indeed.

so you would bang a woman that you found ugly and gross?

PikaKnight

There is some misinformation here... From the male side of things. She does not even have to be attractive. Sorry its true.

Nice. True indeed.

so you would bang a woman that you found ugly and gross?

Some guys do do this. Just saying.

But my opinion is that men and women can be platonic friends, regardless of their sexual orientation too.

Nightterror218

Guys can be platonic friends with girls. maybe not a first if they are attracted.

My best friend is a girl. Platonic, but was not always.

OneEyeUp

Guys can be platonic friends with girls. maybe not a first if they are attracted.

My best friend is a girl. Platonic, but was not always.

Dropping back in for a split second, then leaving again. Men who have ALREADY gotten the prize, can absolutely become true friends with the woman afterwards. Not before. I think women are wired in a reverse fashion.

After reading many of the comments in here from men.... How do I even go on living my life thinking all the men I meet just want to bang me? That's horrible! Can't be right. Right?

My thoughts exactly!

I can see how you would relate to what I said. You're gorg! But I mean I don't want to be ignorant either though, you know? I guess naturally I treat each man on a case by case basis. I never assume they just want to sleep with me right off the bat because they have a penis. But after reading all this, maybe I should think that way!! They're all openly admitting it. lol

Arm yourself with this knowledge. It will make you stronger in the end.

dirtyd89

We're two different genders with different motives and a different way of thinking that's why being friends can't work out.
A woman can't think like a man just like a man can't think like a woman.
The only way I think men can be friends with women is if they never see that significant other as a lover to begin with.
If you look at someone not as a lover to begin with then more then likely you'll remain friends but if you never saw that person as a friend before and just wanted to score then no it will never work out being friends.
I believe if you have the intention of making friends you'll make friends.
If you have the intention of scoring or dating that person then I don't think a long lasting friendship would work because it's hard to look at someone as a friend when you slept with them.
From there that person isn't your friend their your f*** buddy.
Not everyone you meet is worthy of dating or being friend.
Just saying.
Keeping it real.

BurtHuttz

Well if there's one thing this thread has definitively confirmed, it's that there are some messed up dudes out there. Ladies, don't be friends with messed up dudes.

kimmynw1

We're two different genders with different motives and a different way of thinking that's why being friends can't work out.
A woman can't think like a man just like a man can't think like a woman.
The only way I think men can be friends with women is if they never see that significant other as a lover to begin with.
If you look at someone not as a lover to begin with then more then likely you'll remain friends but if you never saw that person as a friend before and just wanted to score then no it will never work out being friends.
I believe if you have the intention of making friends you'll make friends.
If you have the intention of scoring or dating that person then I don't think a long lasting friendship would work because it's hard to look at someone as a friend when you slept with them.
From there that person isn't your friend their your f*** buddy.
Not everyone you meet is worthy of dating or being friend.
Just saying.
Keeping it real.

I have to disagree with this. If in the beginning there was no attraction and simply friendship I think as time goes on feelings actually develop and the other person becomes more and more attractive eventually ending in desire. That being said men and women can be platonic friends for a very long time but not forever.

ILiftHeavyAcrylics

Well if there's one thing this thread has definitively confirmed, it's that there are some messed up dudes out there. Ladies, don't be friends with messed up dudes.

QFT

redheaddee

I can be friends with women.

If they're attractive I'll probably want to sleep with them.

If they're not attractive then I probably won't.

I just assumed that's how it works for you ladies as well . . .

That sounds right.

CLFrancois

Nearly (just making an option that is not 100%) every guy I am friends with I have either already slept with, is gay, or would have no issue having the sex with me or me with them.
So I guess my platonic friends are gay or female.
Which is fine. Cause in all honesty, I do not mind people wanting to have sex, or thinking about it. It is, after all, part of life. Most people like sex anyway... I think?

baileybiddles

Here's my take on the situation.

Girls and guys can certainly be friends. Is the guy gonna want to bang you 24/7? Most likely. Because even if you don't have an amazing face, you have boobs and an *kitten*. Done.

Are you okay with that? I know I am. I've always been closer with guys. Can't stand the female drama. Has every one of my guy friends wanted to bang me and made it evident? Yes. But as soon as I said not interested, they dropped the subject and we remained friends. Did they stare at my *kitten* every time I walked out of the room, or at my boobs every time I turned my head? Yes. Doesn't matter, though. If that sort of thing bothers you, then no. It can't be done.

Elzecat

Let me state it quite clearly for all the females that think they have guy friends `every hole is a goal` doesn`t matter if you are slim/fat/tall/small/friends etc.

If you are available then you are on the menu!

um...no. Are you 12?

There really are adults who don't think with their genitals all the time. Some are guys. Some are women. Some of us are friends.

DalekBrittany

I could definitely not be friends with anyone who referred to having sex with a woman as "getting the prize" :huh:

Elzecat

I could definitely not be friends with anyone who referred to having sex with a woman as "getting the prize" :huh:

I'm glad I was not the only one who was like :huh: :huh: :huh: