Why do people say men and women can't be platonic friends?

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Replies

  • MassiveDelta
    MassiveDelta Posts: 3,271 Member
    There is some misinformation here... From the male side of things. She does not even have to be attractive. Sorry its true.
  • OneEyeUp
    OneEyeUp Posts: 373 Member
    There is some misinformation here... From the male side of things. She does not even have to be attractive. Sorry its true.

    Nice. True indeed.
  • pastryari
    pastryari Posts: 8,646 Member
    It depends on the people involved. If you don't act on it, then it's platonic. I don't care if you secretly want to bang me, just don't ruin an otherwise good friendship because you couldn't keep your d*ck in your pants.

    My best friend decided to try to force himself on me when I was tipsy (not drunk) and really emotional due to a major occurrence that has forever changed my life. He couldn't keep it in his pants to be a friend so end of friendship.

    In the end, I don't care what a guy's thoughts are. The actions are what counts.
  • danasings
    danasings Posts: 8,218 Member
    I don't know... *uses mind reading powers*

    Because lamp.

    I LOVE LAMP!

    OP, I have some great male friends, but at some point they have all wanted to have sex with me. Or so they've told me. I don't know.
  • MassiveDelta
    MassiveDelta Posts: 3,271 Member
    It depends on the people involved. If you don't act on it, then it's platonic. I don't care if you secretly want to bang me, just don't ruin an otherwise good friendship because you couldn't keep your d*ck in your pants.

    My best friend decided to try to force himself on me when I was tipsy (not drunk) and really emotional due to a major occurrence that has forever changed my life. He couldn't keep it in his pants to be a friend so end of friendship.

    In the end, I don't care what a guy's thoughts are. The actions are what counts.

    He dumped you didn't he? Too soon?
  • olDave
    olDave Posts: 557 Member
    There were people of old, smarter than us, who believed that if you fantasized about a woman, then you incurred the sin/pleasure of doing so.

    They thought the earth was flat, too.

    You really think thoughts=actions? Because if so, I oughta be on death row.

    Sigh. I have since removed that one sentence from the post. The rest of the paragraph is the main point. "People of old," is a reference to the abilities that people of ancient times had to predict future events and phenomena. The people of today have no true abilities like that, instead its " Call me now for ya free readin." Obviously intentions aren't actions......

    Here is the fixed post.
    Astute, yet linear. In a universe that may very well exist with multiple layers of one instance of reality, to view anything like this , is how cheating and adultery happen. The DESIRE to have sex with a woman is the emotionalized action of doing so. Besides the incorporeal aspect of it, intention OFTEN becomes action. Put simply, even if it didn't happen I wouldn't want my wife spending the night with a man who desired to bang her. (it's not about not having trust in the wife, its about a barbaric man slavering over her privacies. Why does no one understand the precious nature of a woman's spirit/body?)


    You have gone down a rabbit trail. Your agreement with some ancient beliefs does not apply to me. When you decide to agree on the popular definition of a platonic relationship then we can talk.

    Peace:smile:
  • twinketta
    twinketta Posts: 2,130 Member
    Let me state it quite clearly for all the females that think they have guy friends `every hole is a goal` doesn`t matter if you are slim/fat/tall/small/friends etc.

    If you are available then you are on the menu!
  • eric_sg61
    eric_sg61 Posts: 2,925 Member
    Just because I wanna bang someone doesn't mean that I will or that they can't be my friend.
    Also, this. I've had loads of male friends. They've very clearly stated they want to bang me. And that's fine. As long as they don't act on it, I couldn't care less.

    And, holy newsflash, Batman! They never do.
    Why would you still be friends with them? They want to bang you. That means everytime they interact with you, they are trying their hardest to get laid. That means they do not present themeselves genuinely to you. Would they still be your friends if you became hideously disfigured?
  • OneEyeUp
    OneEyeUp Posts: 373 Member
    I could, however, steal the most attractive man's woman, by taking control of her emotions.

    You're delusional.

    I don't know why people do this. They focus on one sentence in a body of words, that is NOT the main point. This isn't an ego trip. This is an explanation of cosmic truths that cannot be refuted.




    Again, here is the original post with that one sentence REMOVED. Please focus on the point.
    Then you believe that the body is more powerful than the soul.The word platonic is not platonic. The word love isn't love. Do you know how many people use that word and have no clue of its meaning? Websters.com can only get you so far.
  • OneEyeUp
    OneEyeUp Posts: 373 Member
    Just because I wanna bang someone doesn't mean that I will or that they can't be my friend.
    Also, this. I've had loads of male friends. They've very clearly stated they want to bang me. And that's fine. As long as they don't act on it, I couldn't care less.

    And, holy newsflash, Batman! They never do.
    Why would you still be friends with them? They want to bang you. That means everytime they interact with you, they are trying their hardest to get laid. That means they do not present themeselves genuinely to you. Would they still be your friends if you became hideously disfigured?

    Thank you good sir. A breath of fresh air.
  • magerum
    magerum Posts: 12,589 Member
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_lh5fR4DMA&feature=youtube_gdata_player

    Women are the ones who believe men and women can be just friends. They dont realize men cant do this. Its hard coded into men's brains to lust for women and mate. If a man tells you that he's fine with just being friends, its one of several reasons :

    1) (95% of the time) he's a liar, like most of us guys do well. He's waiting for the right moment.
    2) he's a beta and hasn't the nerve or know how to chase you
    3) he's grossed out by the thought of you sexually.
    4) he knows better (I.e. job/boss complications, best friends sister, etc)

    Look at my video link. Also, scroll through and look at female vs male responses. Proof is in the pudding. Also-

    dayum1.gif

    In, to steal this gif. Thank you. :drinker:
  • supahstar71
    supahstar71 Posts: 926 Member
    Because its true.
    We can all feign ignorance here, but we know that this is about the size of the woman's butt.


    :laugh: Best response. :flowerforyou:
  • DonnaNCgirl
    DonnaNCgirl Posts: 372
    But you say he's just a friend? Oh baby you, you've got what I need.

    I have banged and will bang every male friend who is available and hot, but you have to be hot. If you're unsure whether or not I find you bangable, just add copious amounts of alcohol. If alcohol doesn't work, I find you completely unattractive and wouldn't bang you with somebody else's vagina. If I haven't suggesting banging, I probably find you completely hideous (possibly unavailable for one reason or another). We can go back to being platonic in the morning, unless the sex is great then it will likely happen again. Even the unavailable man becomes completely available under the right circumstances.

    Men want to bang me females whether they're friends or not, unless they find you unattractive or are intimidated by you.

    Male friend = probable banger

    Don't be ignorant fellow women! Men wanna bang and will bang anything that doesn't move out of their way fast enough. They are controlled by their smaller, more primal brain.

    SOOOOO glad I took a break from getting ready to go back to work Monday. Now it's back to work. Back later to check the battle field. Somebody here is angry.
  • Griffin220x
    Griffin220x Posts: 399
    BS
  • wineplease
    wineplease Posts: 469 Member
    Just because some ancients were superstitious and believed that our thoughts somehow condemned us, it doesn't mean they were"smarter than us". If anything, man has become more knowledgable about himself and his world.Besides, we're talking about the modern day definition of "platonic".

    Wait....certainly you're not suggesting that Plato, Socrates and Aristotle were not smart, but merely superstitious! Unless, of course you're saying that everyone who believes our thoughts condemn us because that's what was taught by Jesus, makes us superstitious then I can see where you're coming from.

    With all due respect, there are plenty of well-educated people who believe we sin, "in our thoughts and in our words, in what we've done and what we've failed to do". Just because you don't believe that doesn't make you superior and others "less smart".
  • Thewatcher_66
    Thewatcher_66 Posts: 1,643 Member
    Just doing a bit of reading in my down time at work, and came across a "study" apparently proving that men and women cannot be just friends. But it doesn't actually suggest that men and women can’t be friends; nor does it seem it was ever the researchers’ objective to prove it. It looks like they set out to show that experiences reflect men’s short-term sexual desires relative to women’s - which is something rather different. I would like to get opinions from both men and women on this.

    In my opinion, I do think that men and women can sustain a platonic relationship. There may be some attraction, but that doesn't mean that they are unable to maintain fulfilling and non-sexual relationships. Friendship itself can vary from person to person, incorporating everything from a best friend since grade school to someone you once drunkenly kissed at a party. Sexual attraction may add an extra dynamic to friendships between men and women, and could also lead to occasional problems. But stop to think... seeing it as some sort of friendship ultimatum would make for a lot of lonely people.

    Again, I'm just looking for personal opinions.

    This might sound cruel and mean but the only way I could sustain a platonic relationship with a woman is if there was no way I could ever become sexually/physically attracted to her. I do have some gorgeous platonic female friends but it's hard folks. Trust me, it's hard.
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    Let me state it quite clearly for all the females that think they have guy friends `every hole is a goal` doesn`t matter if you are slim/fat/tall/small/friends etc.

    If you are available then you are on the menu!

    Thanks for speaking for every man on the planet. I'm sure they appreciate your exemplary knowledge on the fact that "every hole is a goal."
  • Pixi_Rex
    Pixi_Rex Posts: 1,676 Member
    Well my best friend is a man.... and a straight one at that and I can honestly say that I hae never had any feeling of attraction for him, and he never has had it for me. How do I know this? Because we TALK... about everything. We became friends because we share an interest in Cars... from there it blossomed into movies and music and basically everything else. Our mutual friends joke that I am the female version of him and vice versa.

    I texted him before I started writing my answer and I said "truth time sir. If you had the chance to sleep with me would you?" he answer VERBATIM from the Text "No. Not that you aren't attractive and awesome and everything I would ever look for in a girl but because you are my best friend and kind of more like a sister."

    So there you have it. I am more of a sister to him than anything else. So can Men and women be platonic friends? I believe so.
  • twinketta
    twinketta Posts: 2,130 Member
    It depends on the people involved. If you don't act on it, then it's platonic. I don't care if you secretly want to bang me, just don't ruin an otherwise good friendship because you couldn't keep your d*ck in your pants.

    My best friend decided to try to force himself on me when I was tipsy (not drunk) and really emotional due to a major occurrence that has forever changed my life. He couldn't keep it in his pants to be a friend so end of friendship.

    In the end, I don't care what a guy's thoughts are. The actions are what counts.

    Then you believe that the body is more powerful than the soul. Let me tell you something.... I am not the most attractive guy out there. I could, however, steal the most attractive man's woman, by taking control of her emotions. As could any man with the presence of mind to do it. The word platonic is not platonic. The word love isn't love. Do you know how many people use that word and have no clue of its meaning? Websters.com can only get you so far.

    Good call...let us hope some of the ladies are reading this post!

    And for the ladies information I am female and happily married!
  • OneEyeUp
    OneEyeUp Posts: 373 Member
    Just because some ancients were superstitious and believed that our thoughts somehow condemned us, it doesn't mean they were"smarter than us". If anything, man has become more knowledgable about himself and his world.Besides, we're talking about the modern day definition of "platonic".

    Wait....certainly you're not suggesting that Plato, Socrates and Aristotle were not smart, but merely superstitious! Just because you don't believe that doesn't make you superior and others "less smart".

    I love it.
  • VorJoshigan
    VorJoshigan Posts: 1,106 Member
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_lh5fR4DMA&feature=youtube_gdata_player

    Women are the ones who believe men and women can be just friends. They dont realize men cant do this. Its hard coded into men's brains to lust for women and mate. If a man tells you that he's fine with just being friends, its one of several reasons :

    1) (95% of the time) he's a liar, like most of us guys do well. He's waiting for the right moment.
    2) he's a beta and hasn't the nerve or know how to chase you
    3) he's grossed out by the thought of you sexually.
    4) he knows better (I.e. job/boss complications, best friends sister, etc)

    I disagree. Call me a beta if it makes you feel better, but it's actually pretty easy to be friends with somebody you want to have sex with. Just don't act on those impulses.
  • norcal_yogi
    norcal_yogi Posts: 675 Member
    Because its true.

    yep
  • People say it because its true.
    plain and simple.
    if you're friends - one side is attracted to the other, or both.

    and ladies when u say "oh i have a friend and im not attracted to him, were only friends.."

    he's attracted to you
  • twinketta
    twinketta Posts: 2,130 Member
    Let me state it quite clearly for all the females that think they have guy friends `every hole is a goal` doesn`t matter if you are slim/fat/tall/small/friends etc.

    If you are available then you are on the menu!

    Thanks for speaking for every man on the planet. I'm sure they appreciate your exemplary knowledge on the fact that "every hole is a goal."

    For all the guys that have responded on this thread I think you will get at least a 75% response if not more?

    I am not saying you can not get hearts and flowers from a guy but not one that is `just a friend`
  • DonnaNCgirl
    DonnaNCgirl Posts: 372
    Nevermind.

    I'm going to take my toys and play with the big boys.
  • MelsAuntie
    MelsAuntie Posts: 2,833 Member
    Of course they can. ALL of my male friends are platonic friends. A number of them for at least forty years.
  • meerkat70
    meerkat70 Posts: 4,605 Member

    This is a very common delusion. Women simply don't understand the male mind. We do nothing for women without at least a 0.5% hope that sex will come of it.

    There's just the one Male Mind, is there... ?
  • 2stepz
    2stepz Posts: 814 Member
    I can maintain platonic friendships with men that are single... until they start dating someone and SHE has a problem with our friendship. Multiple instances of this in my past have established a pattern. Uggh.
  • LuckyLeprechaun
    LuckyLeprechaun Posts: 6,296 Member
    I could, however, steal the most attractive man's woman, by taking control of her emotions.

    You're delusional.
  • OneEyeUp
    OneEyeUp Posts: 373 Member


    If platonic isn't platonic and love isn't love then the logical conclusion is that emotion isn't emotion, control isn't control, etc. :noway:

    In your sarcasm, you actually made a very logical point.