Help! my husband wont let me lift heavy weights

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  • mmddwechanged
    mmddwechanged Posts: 1,687 Member
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    My husband hid my bench and barbell a few months ago. But I found them:) they're kinda big.
  • mmddwechanged
    mmddwechanged Posts: 1,687 Member
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    I had to join a gym and not tell my wife for a few months. she hates when I go for a run.

    I mean just go do it and eventually he will come around, just don't admit you were cheating on him with gym.

    I agree. Sneaky lifting is one strategy.
  • Bloomsday
    Bloomsday Posts: 66 Member
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    Your husband won't LET you??


    Think about that for a while.... then go lift something heavy.

    THIS.

    How you exercise is not your only problem here ...
  • mmddwechanged
    mmddwechanged Posts: 1,687 Member
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    Just tell him you're going to zumba but hit the squat rack instead.

    Lol^. Love this!!!! Made my day:)
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
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    My wife won't let me sleep with other women!

    Well, after reading this thread, damn her! It's my body and I will do as I please. She can't tell me what to do.

    Compromise. Pah...

    Cheating on your partner is completely different as you are harming someone else. No comparison whatsoever.

    Disregarding your partner's feelings or dismissing their insecurities out of hand is harmful to someone else: your partner.

    All this posturing is utter nonsense.

    posturing is what these forums are all about. These same posters will be force feeding their husbands health food in a thread about "My husband doesn't like the all kale and tofu diet I've put him on for his own good."
  • itsDorian7
    itsDorian7 Posts: 105 Member
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    My Ex told me the same thing. He never missed an opportunity to tell me how unattractive I was becoming from lifting. Whatever. Now I own my own gym, and he is a distant bad memory.
  • kimberly728
    kimberly728 Posts: 124
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    just dont even talk about it... go to the gym, do the lifting routine you want, and when he starts to notice good changes and pointing out what he likes- tell him how you got those results!
  • lcvaughn520
    lcvaughn520 Posts: 219 Member
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    My boyfriend used to tease me about how often I ate - I subscribe to the theory that it's better (for me) to eat smaller quantities more often. I let it get to me, started eating how HE ate, and ended up gaining a lot of weight. The point is, men do not always understand how women's bodies work. You know what's right for you, just do it! He'll see that he is wrong. I wish I could have followed my own advice, then I wouldn't be trying to lose all this weight now!

    Oh and just to clarify, I, of course, thought his comments were intended to tell me he didn't like how I looked. Wrong-O!!! He's just a joker, and didn't realize that teasing me about food was so hurtful.
  • MelsAuntie
    MelsAuntie Posts: 2,833 Member
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    He won't LET you? Lift something heavy, and throw it at him. :) Seriously, if my husband said he wasn't going to "let" me do something, that would guarantee I'd do it. I don't take orders from him, or from anybody.
  • lithezebra
    lithezebra Posts: 3,670 Member
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    Just tell him you're going to zumba but hit the squat rack instead.

    Lol^. Love this!!!! Made my day:)

    Excellent plan.The idea of leaving someone who likes you the way you are, and doesn't know much about women lifting, just because he's being silly, seems excessive. Keep communicating, have some success with your fitness goals, and he's likely to come around.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    You know, maybe this isn't the best approach, but I would just go and do it behind his back, and when he starts bragging about how great your shape is you can tell him that your nice, tight bum has been brought to him by lifting. Also, maybe you could just refer to it as strength training. It takes the whole notion of weights out of the equation.

    Take my advice with a grain of salt. I'm divorced. LOL!
  • TubbsMcGee
    TubbsMcGee Posts: 1,058 Member
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    I understand what you're trying to say, and that "let" isn't the right word

    My guy is terrified of me bulking up and looking like Arnold Schwarzenegger with long hair.

    Know how I got him over that fear?
    By telling him that it will make my booty look bigger.
    When he questioned why I was lifting so heavy up top, I explained that I'm learning how to twerk it.
  • Lyerin
    Lyerin Posts: 818 Member
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    What do you mean he won't "let" you? You are a grown-up and make your own decisions. Don't let him discourage you from lifting weights if you want to do it. *Show* him how awesome you look when lifting, and he won't complain. :)
  • silvergurl518
    silvergurl518 Posts: 4,123 Member
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    i don't see how getting healthy for you should in any way be a threat to him...if this is a true partnership. he needs to understand that you want to get strong for YOU...and for him.
  • lauren3101
    lauren3101 Posts: 1,853 Member
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    My wife won't let me sleep with other women!

    Well, after reading this thread, damn her! It's my body and I will do as I please. She can't tell me what to do.

    Compromise. Pah...

    Cheating on your partner is completely different as you are harming someone else. No comparison whatsoever.

    Disregarding your partner's feelings or dismissing their insecurities out of hand is harmful to someone else: your partner.

    All this posturing is utter nonsense.

    Please tell me then, as I am intrigued, how exactly do you compromise on the fact that your wife doesn't want you to sleep with other women?

    The OPs husbands insecurities are a different problem and need to be resolved seperately. Insecurities does not give someone the right to stop their partner from getting healthy.
  • nklunk
    nklunk Posts: 149 Member
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    My hubby is the same way. He doesn't think I should have any muscle definition at all. I told him it's not his body so I'll do whatever I want. If he doesn't like it he doesn't have to look at it.
  • sweebum
    sweebum Posts: 1,060 Member
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    I would drop a barbell on his toe. On purpose.

    Seriously, google Nia Shanks. She can deadlift +300 lbs and she's tiny and slim, no bulk.
  • Babeskeez
    Babeskeez Posts: 606 Member
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    If my husband said this to me, I would INCREASE my weight lifting schedule just to spite him. :laugh:
  • OkieTink
    OkieTink Posts: 285 Member
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    Get a new husband.

    :)
  • myofibril
    myofibril Posts: 4,500 Member
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    Please tell me then, as I am intrigued, how exactly do you compromise on the fact that your wife doesn't want you to sleep with other women?

    Me personally? I don't.

    If I did however decide it was that big a deal to me then I would, at a minimum, discuss it with her first rather than do it behind her back. Honesty is the best policy and all that.
    The OPs husbands insecurities are a different problem and need to be resolved seperately. Insecurities does not give someone the right to stop their partner from getting healthy.

    You're right they don't. However neither do they give people the right to simply disregard what their partner is feeling, well, not unless you want a non functioning relationship that is...

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