pregnancy doesn't "ruin" your body...

ntanasiciuk

All I'm gonna say is that it never ceases to amaze me what lengths folks on the Internet will go to just to avoid saying "My bad, I probably shouldn't have said that."

I was thinking the EXACT SAME THING. Instead, they get defensive and "Ya well THIS happened to me blahblahblah". Like really? With everything people here are telling you, you cant go 'oh, my bad. Sorry guys I didn't think about genetics and skin elasticity being a big contributer since I had good genes and it never crossed my mind. Maybe that is why I could not find much pictures on the internet showing post-pregnancy weight. I was only trying to encourage and motivate."

I have not had a baby get, but let me tell you... I have my mothers genes. Her stomach is a road map! Just from me being overweight, I have stretch marks ALL over my body. I can only assume what my stomach will look like when I balloon up with a baby belly... hers. The only difference is that I will not think it 'ruined' my body. I do not care that my stomach may not be tight and markless, I really don't. But guess what? Some people do. Some people feel like their bodies have been ruined. Who are you to say that it doesn't just because it hasn't for you?

avababy05

You look great!

My last pregnancy,at age 37 killed me!

I started at 125 and became ill.I had to take steriods to continue breathing and weighed 199 the day she was born ( all ten pounds of her) That's a lot of weight to put on in 9 months.Especially if you're just over five feet.

avababy05

I know that you are trying to give people hope. I don't think having babies hurt my body either and I do have good genetics. But for people looking for an excuse, it's as good as any of them.

This is bull. Walk a mile in someone else's shoes.

My last baby was my third,the other two were 16 and 18 when I had my baby.

Fortunately, I didn't have pneumonia with the other two and didn't gain more than 25 pounds. Not an excuse,fact : pregnancy can still,in this day and age endanger a mothers life.

zyxst

Thank you for the cure for my depression. It's been cupcakes the whole time! Here stupid me thought it was a silly li'l "chemical imbalance" that became magnified due to the crapton of estrogen running through my system.

KatLifter

Thank you for the cure for my depression. It's been cupcakes the whole time! Here stupid me thought it was a silly li'l "chemical imbalance" that became magnified due to the crapton of estrogen running through my system.

So you're blaming Dwight for your depression?
Take responsibility for yourself. I have depression too - and treated it. It makes us all look bad when you use that as an excuse.
Oh, and depression doesn't force you to eat cupcakes. Eating healthy and exercising actually helps make it better. Just a PSA.

JenAndSome

No, but it does ruin your vag....

:noway:

You must be doing it wrong...

Cutemisscoco

OP, you look amazing!

AlongCame_Molly

No, but it does ruin your vag....

Not always. The husband said mine was better than ever after my stitches came out and I got cleared for Married Fun-Time.



edited for clarity

cleotherio

No, but it does ruin your vag....

If that were true, nobody would have more than one kid.

FitterStrongerHappier

First off - it's sad that so many people are ignorant of the fact that every persons body is different. Not to mention that the age at which you have children, the individual circumstances of the pregnancy, if it's a multiple pregnancy, and other issues, greatly impact a body's ability to snap back. As far as the boobs situation, I've seen women who have had 'mass' and after breast feeding, the mass is gone, and no amount of diet or exercise will bring that back.

Also, losing weight doesn't mean that the skin that was stretched will snap back either. Age, genetics, etc have a HUGE impact on the success in this area. It's no different than a person who has lost 100 lbs and whose skin snapped back, judging others and saying - 'well, MY body did it - if YOURS doesn't, they you OBVIOUSLY aren't working hard enough'. It's extremely judgemental to say others are just using 'excuses' for not bouncing back.

for me -it's irrelevant - I was overweight before I got pregnant, and actually weigh less now than I did when I got pregnant. Not everyone's body responds to things the same way.

Lastly - to those who are worried about what a baby might do to their body - if you haven't had a child yet, consider this: for some moms - possibly the majority - Looking at your child after birth makes any thing else experienced worth it - completely. If you can imagine the most amazing experience in your life, the most beautiful, wonderful, fulfilling thing you could ever do, this is it. You may be slightly frustrated at the changes in your body, but, it's also possible that it won't really matter to you, because the blessing is worth anything you go through to get there.

Good luck

dieKriegerin77

I want to read the crazy in this thread later!

angieleighbyrd

I'm pregnant right now.



This is my 4th. I cried over spilled coffee a few days ago.




I would like to be the bigger person and say congrats to you, but my hormones won't let me do that so I'm just gonna say....


Must be nice....


This is also my 4th pregnancy. Come to me after your 4th and tell me your body is still as awesome as it is now.

sc10985

Not everyone bounces back quickly and I'd consider stretch marks as at least ruining the skin on your stomach. We all have different bodies you know.

ahappydancer

This is one of the reasons why I won't be having kids. Losing weight is really hard for me. Losing weight after pregnancy while dealing with a baby, recovering from pregnancy, larger sized feet (did you know that your shoe size can be permanently altered due to pregnancy?) and the urge to eat nothing but chocolate would make weight loss impossible. I'm studying to be a psychologist, and I know that some people don't have the best self-control. Is it hard for me to refuse a free pack of m&ms? Yeah. Would it be harder while trying to take care of a baby? Yes. There's only so much your brain can focus on before giving up on something.

ElenakiFra

This is one of the reasons why I won't be having kids. Losing weight is really hard for me. Losing weight after pregnancy while dealing with a baby, recovering from pregnancy, larger sized feet (did you know that your shoe size can be permanently altered due to pregnancy?) and the urge to eat nothing but chocolate would make weight loss impossible. I'm studying to be a psychologist, and I know that some people don't have the best self-control. Is it hard for me to refuse a free pack of m&ms? Yeah. Would it be harder while trying to take care of a baby? Yes. There's only so much your brain can focus on before giving up on something.

This is the most pathetic post i ever saw! Some women just should not be mothers but dont tell me this is a reason for you to dont be one. Ive heard super bodies tell things like that...but i assume you have extra pounds.
If you are weak in mind you wont loose the weight.
I am mother of twins and now i have the best body i ever had even post pregnancy besides some strech marks on my belly.

glovepuppet

This is one of the reasons why I won't be having kids. Losing weight is really hard for me. Losing weight after pregnancy while dealing with a baby, recovering from pregnancy, larger sized feet (did you know that your shoe size can be permanently altered due to pregnancy?) and the urge to eat nothing but chocolate would make weight loss impossible. I'm studying to be a psychologist, and I know that some people don't have the best self-control. Is it hard for me to refuse a free pack of m&ms? Yeah. Would it be harder while trying to take care of a baby? Yes. There's only so much your brain can focus on before giving up on something.

This is the most pathetic post i ever saw! Some women just should not be mothers but dont tell me this is a reason for you to dont be one. Ive heard super bodies tell things like that...but i assume you have extra pounds.
If you are weak in mind you wont loose the weight.
I am mother of twins and now i have the best body i ever had even post pregnancy besdides some strech marks on my belly.

why is it pathetic to acknowledge you aren't willing to do what it takes? would it be better for her to have kids and regret it? will society collapse if she doesn't breed?

she's made a valid choice for her own personal reasons. i think it's more pathetic to judge her for deciding to be responsible and not have kids if there's a chance she can't deal with the consequences.

Athena53

It's partly good genetics. I agree wholeheartedly. I bounced back pretty well after I had DS at age 31 but I was riding a bicycle 10 miles every night (including the night before he was born) and my mother had 5 kids and never wore maternity clothes home from the hospital. DH has taken over converting all the slides Dad took over 4 decades into digital and Dad really liked taking pictures of Mom in her bathing suit over the years!

If you have a difficult pregnancy and end up needing steroids, months of bed rest, or have other complications, you need to do what you have to do and focus on keeping you and your baby healthy. Having said that, though, I work with 2 wonderful young women blessed with healthy pregnancies who ate up a storm and just piled on the weight. One had her baby in February and is back at Weight Watchers and taking it seriously. The other is due next month and she's going to have a lot to lose after she has her baby. I didn't/don't nag them- I'm their boss, not their mother- but I don't know why they weren't more careful during their pregnancy. While I would never go back to the 1950s (my Ex's Aunt said that one doc would yell at you if you gained more than 2 lbs./month while pregnant), I do think doctors should emphasize keeping the weight gain to a reasonable level.

ZellyKat

My baby didn't ruin my body. I did. I listened to every craving and indulged. Even my doc was supportive of me eating the stuff I used to avoid like the plague.

I hardly age before I got pregnant because I was always paranoid about being fat. In my mind even in a size 6 pair of jeans meant I was fat because I have sisters who were in 0-2 size jeans. Of course they don't have wide hips like mine, but it didn't matter in my mentality at the time. Its terrible but true, I have and am still battling low self esteem issues.

At 130 pounds at 5 feet tall, I thought I was fat.. then pregnancy hit and whamoo. I gained 50 pounds. I deprived myself of things before and I figured why not eat that taco, or hamburger.. why not eat those french fries and smother it with cheese. Why not, right? Yeah... "why not" is why it's taken me a whole year to loose 40 of those pounds. I still need 10 more. Plus belly stretch marks right under my belly button. Which sucks because I love to belly dance and all my costumes expose that area.

In short, my daughter didn't ruin me... I ruined me. (And Taco Bell.. I blame Taco Bell for being so fricken good.)

ElenakiFra

I wouldnt say anything like that if she didn't like the idea to commit and take care someone except her self or not be mentally ready for something like that.
But please...kids and pregnancy will ruin my body, make me even fatter ect i cannot accept it.Its just big excuse.
Ofc society will not collapse!

glovepuppet

I wouldnt say anything like that if she didn't like the idea to commit and take care someone except her self or not be mentally ready for something like that.
But please...kids and pregnancy will ruin my body, make me even fatter ect i cannot accept it.Its just big excuse.
Ofc society will not collapse!

you don't need an excuse not to have kids. any reason will do. not liking the smell of sick, not wanting to go through birth, whatever.

actually, society would be vastly improved if people were expected to have a good reason for having kids.

ahappydancer

This is one of the reasons why I won't be having kids. Losing weight is really hard for me. Losing weight after pregnancy while dealing with a baby, recovering from pregnancy, larger sized feet (did you know that your shoe size can be permanently altered due to pregnancy?) and the urge to eat nothing but chocolate would make weight loss impossible. I'm studying to be a psychologist, and I know that some people don't have the best self-control. Is it hard for me to refuse a free pack of m&ms? Yeah. Would it be harder while trying to take care of a baby? Yes. There's only so much your brain can focus on before giving up on something.

This is the most pathetic post i ever saw! Some women just should not be mothers but dont tell me this is a reason for you to dont be one. Ive heard super bodies tell things like that...but i assume you have extra pounds.
If you are weak in mind you wont loose the weight.
I am mother of twins and now i have the best body i ever had even post pregnancy besides some strech marks on my belly.

Uh, not wanting to put in the work is a damn good reason. Let me make this clear, since you didn't seem to get it: psychologically speaking, not everyone has the self control to lose weight easily. Pregnancy makes that harder. Raising kids is not easy.
Honestly, I don't get your post. First you say that some women shouldn't have kids, then you say that one of my reasons us dumb? Does it matter if a reason is dumb? Imo, you should have to have a good reason to have a kid, and it doesn't matter what your reason for not having them is. Having a baby is a bigger decision than not having one.

lilmissymoo90

i wish ... im 23 my sons 2 so i was young ... my son was 8lb 3 i hurt my pelvic bones when pregnant and couldnt walk so gained alot of weight also while i had severe morning sickness and was sick when i drank or ate anything got to the point i was going to be hospitalised unless i kept hydrated ... drinking water u know ur going to throw up constantly just to stay out of hospital ... my belly has stretch marks its yuk and will never look the way it did .., but i would never trade my son for a nice body because at the end of the day when im old everything will sag i wont be sexy or gorgeous but ill have my son to be proud of

lilmissymoo90

This is one of the reasons why I won't be having kids. Losing weight is really hard for me. Losing weight after pregnancy while dealing with a baby, recovering from pregnancy, larger sized feet (did you know that your shoe size can be permanently altered due to pregnancy?) and the urge to eat nothing but chocolate would make weight loss impossible. I'm studying to be a psychologist, and I know that some people don't have the best self-control. Is it hard for me to refuse a free pack of m&ms? Yeah. Would it be harder while trying to take care of a baby? Yes. There's only so much your brain can focus on before giving up on something.

This is the most pathetic post i ever saw! Some women just should not be mothers but dont tell me this is a reason for you to dont be one. Ive heard super bodies tell things like that...but i assume you have extra pounds.
If you are weak in mind you wont loose the weight.
I am mother of twins and now i have the best body i ever had even post pregnancy besides some strech marks on my belly.

Uh, not wanting to put in the work is a damn good reason. Let me make this clear, since you didn't seem to get it: psychologically speaking, not everyone has the self control to lose weight easily. Pregnancy makes that harder. Raising kids is not easy.
Honestly, I don't get your post. First you say that some women shouldn't have kids, then you say that one of my reasons us dumb? Does it matter if a reason is dumb? Imo, you should have to have a good reason to have a kid, and it doesn't matter what your reason for not having them is. Having a baby is a bigger decision than not having one.

are you saying you dont want to have kids incase you get fatter?? ... hell ive lost 92lb lighter than i was when i got pregnant .. and i would happily have another 92lb stuck on my body than not have my son

fattymcrunnerpants

lol. perfect pregnancy. if you call having hyperemesis and vomitting several times a day, every single day for 4 months straight perfect. I realize that not everyone bounces back as quickly as i did. recently, i heard someone say they dont want kids because they dont want their body to be 'ruined'. i posted this to show people that having kids does not automatically ruin your body. hell, i look better than almost all my childless friends. am i bragging about it? hell ya i am because i'm proud of it.

I'm late to the party but I just wanted to give you a huge middle finger.

After my first child I kicked my *kitten* into gear and I still didn't look good in a bikini. Never will. Don't have your perfect genetics. It also took a YEAR to get it all off. After my second pregancy I couldn't lose weight. At all. In fact, after my last surgery in December I gained weight Not because I let myself go, but because my body sucks. I'm finally just figuring everything out and hoping it will work. You are not inspiring. You make women who don't have perfect genetics feel horrible about themselves.

ahappydancer

I said that not wanting to get fatter and try to lose the weight after was ONE of the reasons. I'm sure your child is wonderful-I love children-but I have a lot of other reasons, too.

dixiewhiskey

Enough judgment... while what you do, how you do it, how you look works for you, it doesn't work for other people. I happen to be one of the people who gained 50+ with each child, watching what I was eating, I didn't let myself go.. I don't regret my children, if anything I regret my genetics for ending up with sagging skin in the belly region. One should not assume because they have success and good genetics that everyone can. We can all try our best and we can only do what we put our minds to so leave it at that.

lilmissymoo90

I said that not wanting to get fatter and try to lose the weight after was ONE of the reasons. I'm sure your child is wonderful-I love children-but I have a lot of other reasons, too.

your choice i saposs i have a tilted womb and they said it could make it hard for me to get pregnant i saposs thats why i cant understand people not wanting kids unless of course its for reason like they cant look after them ect they cant provide for them

Jaikagen

3 babys later and i have stretch marks from my ankles, all up my legs, covering my tummy, chest, back, and down my arms to my elbows. I was a healthy UK size 8 and jumped to a 12 in a few short weeks. Pregnancy did ruin my body. Congrats to you tho.

Mamahana82

People have children for selfish reasons, why shouldn't people be allowed to NOT have children for selfish reasons? I don't judge anyone for not wanting children. Period.

dixiewhiskey

Had the kid.. gained 80+ lbs while pregnant... worked my A%^ off (quite literally too) to get to where I am now.

I have stretch marks- LOTS of them. I still have some work to do/am not quite as tight/firm as I'd like to be... do I think my body is ruined because of some flub or stretch marks? HELL no.

I'm not sure what side of the bed some of you rolled out of, but dang! OP's post is inspiring and encouraging- not some insulting or discriminating thing. Gahhh...

I agree. I think OP was trying to inspire but wrote it in a way that I would have worded differently. Honestly, if I didn't have my kiddos, I wouldn't have learned how to lose weight (fat) properly and build muscle. I dunno, I think my body is beautiful from childbirth but in a sense slightly ruined cause of the sagging skin (which will take surgery to unsag).. but guess what, I still love my body and don't care! I workout like a boss anyway, knowing that I may not have a magazine bikini bod but that I am a strong mother and person :laugh: