Embarrassed to go jogging because of pervs.

kkclif

.

kkclif

awwwww too pretty to run.

What an entitled thing to say. As if pretty women deserve sexual harassment and it's a "compliment"? No, dude, it's really not.

That's just your opinion.

'Cat calling' when done correctly can be quite an efficient way of getting a girls number.

You just have to be respectful about it.

For example:

"Hey toots why don't you come over here and sit on my lap!"

Can easily be

"Hey beautiful why don't you come over here and sit on my lap please!"

I really hope your not serious.

smantha32

Here's some helpful information for those who are totally ignorant on the subject:

1 in 5 women have been raped according to the CDC. Of those, 12% were raped before age 11. 1in 4 women have been the victim of violence from a partner.

http://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/nisvs_factsheet-a.pdf

Here is a helpful graphic and information about the graphic. One important thing to note about this is that false rape reports are low (about 2%) and VERY VERY VERY RARELY does a false report of rape ever name the perp. Most false rapes reported are reports of stranger rapes.

http://theenlivenproject.com/the-truth-about-false-accusation/

And these are the ones that are REPORTED. Many women don't report being raped.
And children can't.

kkclif

I used to know where your coming from and it was annoying as Hell. I just ignored it. I never understood why men do that? I mean has it ever worked in their favor?

Have you ever been to Florida during spring break? On a college campus? At a car show or a bike meet? To the gym? Hung out at a bar?

Yes, talking to women works . . .

talking works. Making kissy noises, grunting, commenting on "assets", telling a woman what you'd like to do to her? probably not so much.

Yep. You've never been to spring break . . .

I'm not condoning the behavior, but it clearly works.

Are you really comparing spring break to real life?

Oishii

I would rather have catcalls (not that I get any) than take the risk of running where no one can see if something terrible happens. I live in one of the safest areas of the UK, statistically, but a woman was stabbed walking alone with her baby shortly after we moved to the area, so I know nowhere is safe.

It took me ages to work out the best place for a run near here. Now the route I run has a constant stream of traffic and a constant stream of joggers. I leave the path to make a lap or two of the green to reach 5K, but that is very open too. I don't know why I didn't think of it sooner. Only downside is someone I know usually sees me at some point :laugh:

MelsAuntie

Hey... they are checking you out!! Celebrate that and just keep running....

CELEBRATE that? Are you effing serious?

MelsAuntie

I don't have time to read the other responses right now, but when this happens to me...

this never happens to me.

And you should be glad it doesn't.

CorvusCorax77

I really feel that there is something to be said for context and style when it comes to what is acceptable and what is not. And I don't think it's that hard to figure it out. I'm not of the camp that anything shouted from a car or said to a woman you don't know is ipso facto harassment.... but there certainly has been a lot shouted at me or said to me from cars that made me feel disgusting or unsafe. I would advise, at the very least gentlemen, if you are going to shout something to a beautiful woman jogging down the street that you take the following tips into account:

(1) best to keep the lewd/raunchy language out of it
(2) DO NOT SLOW YOUR CAR DOWN, stop it in front of a woman you don't know, or drive around the block to come back for a second shot. That's creepy.
(3) DO NOT expect a response. She has a vagina and you noticed. It's not like you showed up to her birthday party with a great gift. She doesn't owe you a thank you card. She doesn't even owe you recognition that you are alive.
(4) woman on street has her own life and own agenda. She may be late. She may be depressed. She may be trying to figure out how to not get evicted. Don't expect being polite to random strangers to be on her agenda.
(5) NEVER expect a woman to stop and engage with you
(6) DO NOT stare at her buttocks or boobs. Come on. Be an adult.

And I would advise women to not take every little thing as a threat. If a guy smiles as you and says you have a nice smile/pretty dress/cool hair/awesome tattooes and keeps walking, he doesn't deserve to have his head bit off or accused of sexual harassment. That's just someone being nice.

jofjltncb6

Hey... they are checking you out!! Celebrate that and just keep running....

CELEBRATE that? Are you effing serious?

I certainly don't want it to seem like I'm defending obnoxious @$$hats, but what is so offensive about a guy expressing his appreciation (albeit in an admittedly rude way) for a woman's body?

Or is my opinion influenced by the fact that I've experienced more men yelled/whistled at in my lifetime than women?

CorvusCorax77

Here's some helpful information for those who are totally ignorant on the subject:

1 in 5 women have been raped according to the CDC. Of those, 12% were raped before age 11. 1in 4 women have been the victim of violence from a partner.

http://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/nisvs_factsheet-a.pdf

Here is a helpful graphic and information about the graphic. One important thing to note about this is that false rape reports are low (about 2%) and VERY VERY VERY RARELY does a false report of rape ever name the perp. Most false rapes reported are reports of stranger rapes.

http://theenlivenproject.com/the-truth-about-false-accusation/

And these are the ones that are REPORTED. Many women don't report being raped.
And children can't.

Thank you. That is a very important detail that I was hoping someone would notice. Vast majority of rapes are not reported. I found a really amazing article about how we talk about rape (and actually goes right back to what that complete moron said about women crying rape because dude didn't call her back the next day) actually contributes to women not reporting rape:

"Media attention around cases such as Kobe [Bryant] and Duke [University], where victim blaming is intense and daily, makes our work even more challenging....It can cause victims to question themselves and silence them into not telling their experiences and not seeking services."

http://prospect.org/article/what-we-talk-about-when-we-talk-about-rape-0

CorvusCorax77

I certainly don't want it to seem like I'm defending obnoxious @$$hats, but what is so offensive about a guy expressing his appreciation (albeit in an admittedly rude way) for a woman's body?

Or is my opinion influenced by the fact that I've experienced more men yelled/whistled at in my lifetime than women?

Two things:

(1) It's the rudeness of the way it is done that contributes to what is wrong with it; and,

(2) there is inherent and social power dynamics at play between men and women...which isn't to say that it's ok for women to sexually harass men...but it is to say that the larger cultural context is different.

CorvusCorax77

I would rather have catcalls (not that I get any) than take the risk of running where no one can see if something terrible happens. I live in one of the safest areas of the UK, statistically, but a woman was stabbed walking alone with her baby shortly after we moved to the area, so I know nowhere is safe.

It took me ages to work out the best place for a run near here. Now the route I run has a constant stream of traffic and a constant stream of joggers. I leave the path to make a lap or two of the green to reach 5K, but that is very open too. I don't know why I didn't think of it sooner. Only downside is someone I know usually sees me at some point :laugh:

comments like this make me feel like i'm really privileged to live where I live. I only am concerned about my safety when I run at night, and I take my dog with me so I still don't worry. I do get comments, honks, waves, but I think my city is just so progressive that it always stays in a realm that doesn't make me uncomfortable. I have been sexually harassed on the street, but that was downtown, or by obviously insane men. Generally speaking, I feel safe. And women in my city *do* get assaulted in parks and while running, but usually only after dark. And, as I said, after dark my dog goes with me. And he LOVES kicking dudes in the nuts. He's a boxer :laugh:

Schmidt722

I'd quite like to start running outside, but I'd have to go on busy roads with other people and cars. I'm scared that people are going to take the piss. I already get honked at by pervy old men and stuff randomly while walking sometimes. Ugh, it just creeps me out and makes me angry. Unless I wake up super early and go while not many people are around I don't see a way to avoid this... help!

There is nothing pervy about someone honking a horn at you. Aside from that most people don't pay any attention to joggers so i wouldnt worry.

Wow, thanks for mansplaining. I find it pervy.

I find it's a compliment but subjective situation is subjective.

That's great for you. My subjective opinion is that men shouldn't tell women what is or isn't offensive to women.

Clearly that's your job.

No, I was only speaking for myself. Hence: "I find it pervy."

Do you understand now? No? Okay then.

CorvusCorax77

Just my personal opinion...

women that get cat-called 9 out of 10 times are wearing something figure showing/slim-fitting. I'm just being honest here. Males are pervs...it's the same reason if you wear a shirt with your boobs hanging out, they're gonna look, I'm guilty myself from time to time.

Clearly, she is responsible for his bad behavior. LOOK AT WHAT SHE WAS WEARING!

...Y'all know the first rule of rape culture, right?

ETA: Also, this comment is perfect for another thing I always like to point out.... women who address how sexism affects women are often called "man haters." And yet I think that we are the ones who don't hate men, because we don't say stupid **** like "men are pervs." That's sexist and unacceptable.

Sarauk2sf

I will not derail this thread further, but if 25% of the women you know have been forcibly raped, you should probably get to know different types of women.

Reading through this thread is 'eye opening' as to people's perceptions, however, this one caught my eye. Wow! What an incredibly ignorant statement.

BinaryPulsar

I will not derail this thread further, but if 25% of the women you know have been forcibly raped, you should probably get to know different types of women.

Reading through this thread is 'eye opening' as to people's perceptions, however, this one caught my eye. Wow! What an incredibly ignorant statement.

I agree! Thanks Sara!

BinaryPulsar

I just want to say that I have mixed feelings about the original post as well as the thread as a whole. But, the thread conversation has definitely taken a turn into more serious subject matter than the original post.

RllyGudTweetr

Here's some helpful information for those who are totally ignorant on the subject:

1 in 5 women have been raped according to the CDC. Of those, 12% were raped before age 11. 1in 4 women have been the victim of violence from a partner.

http://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/nisvs_factsheet-a.pdf

Here is a helpful graphic and information about the graphic. One important thing to note about this is that false rape reports are low (about 2%) and VERY VERY VERY RARELY does a false report of rape ever name the perp. Most false rapes reported are reports of stranger rapes.

http://theenlivenproject.com/the-truth-about-false-accusation/

And these are the ones that are REPORTED. Many women don't report being raped.
And children can't.

Do you have statistics on the number of unreported rapes? How were they derived?

rml_16

I'd quite like to start running outside, but I'd have to go on busy roads with other people and cars. I'm scared that people are going to take the piss. I already get honked at by pervy old men and stuff randomly while walking sometimes. Ugh, it just creeps me out and makes me angry. Unless I wake up super early and go while not many people are around I don't see a way to avoid this... help!

If random men honking at you is going to keep you from doing it, then you don't really want to do it.

CorvusCorax77

Here's some helpful information for those who are totally ignorant on the subject:

1 in 5 women have been raped according to the CDC. Of those, 12% were raped before age 11. 1in 4 women have been the victim of violence from a partner.

http://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/nisvs_factsheet-a.pdf

Here is a helpful graphic and information about the graphic. One important thing to note about this is that false rape reports are low (about 2%) and VERY VERY VERY RARELY does a false report of rape ever name the perp. Most false rapes reported are reports of stranger rapes.

http://theenlivenproject.com/the-truth-about-false-accusation/

And these are the ones that are REPORTED. Many women don't report being raped.
And children can't.

Do you have statistics on the number of unreported rapes? How were they derived?

You have access to google. Look it up. Generally tho, the term "reported" means reported to the police. The CDC study may actually include rapes not reported to the police, but reported in other ways (sociological studies, perhaps.... Or perhaps from rape crisis centers or from counselors).