Embarrassed to go jogging because of pervs.

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Replies

  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    this thread has taken a serious turn for the worse. for goodness sake even the OP wasn't concerned about being physically assaulted. by her own words she was made to feel uncomfortable by comments that passerby would make as she was running. I'm firmly in the "suck it up, buttercup" camp, but i can understand how people feel differently.

    so someone PUHLEEEZE tell me how a thread that was basically "sticks and stones will break my bones but words can never hurt me" has turned into fear mongering rape thread? yes, rape is a serious and pervasive threat, but this wasn't a rape thread. "nice *kitten*!" yelled from a car window is neither rape nor a sign of impending assault.
  • HardcoreP0rk
    HardcoreP0rk Posts: 936 Member
    I'd quite like to start running outside, but I'd have to go on busy roads with other people and cars. I'm scared that people are going to take the piss. I already get honked at by pervy old men and stuff randomly while walking sometimes. Ugh, it just creeps me out and makes me angry. Unless I wake up super early and go while not many people are around I don't see a way to avoid this... help!

    I am practically naked when I jog and I just don't let it bother me. I wear headphones and cant even hear that nonsense. I jog all over town...trails, roads, in the middle of downtown, parks.

    Some guy catcalled me from a Nissan Versa today. I didn't even realize men drove Nissan Versas
  • goodtimezzzz
    goodtimezzzz Posts: 640 Member
    I agree the attention I get is Obscene ;)
  • MercenaryNoetic26
    MercenaryNoetic26 Posts: 2,747 Member
    ****. It turned into one of "those" threads?

    Anyway, was going to say carry pepper spray just in case. I like the idea of having a lock on hand so I can punch the **** out of anybody who wants to try anything.

    But don't be paranoid. Just be prepared and wear headphones so you can drown out the idiots.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    this thread has taken a serious turn for the worse. for goodness sake even the OP wasn't concerned about being physically assaulted. by her own words she was made to feel uncomfortable by comments that passerby would make as she was running. I'm firmly in the "suck it up, buttercup" camp, but i can understand how people feel differently.

    so someone PUHLEEEZE tell me how a thread that was basically "sticks and stones will break my bones but words can never hurt me" has turned into fear mongering rape thread? yes, rape is a serious and pervasive threat, but this wasn't a rape thread. "nice *kitten*!" yelled from a car window is neither rape nor a sign of impending assault.
    Agreed. I have been exercising outside for years. Pretty much every time, I get honks or whistles, usually several. When I was a teenager, my friends and I got honks, whistles, you name it. We were even stupid enough to accept rides from random complete strangers. I have never been raped.

    I'm not saying it doesn't happen and I'm very sad as an adult to have realized especially how often children are molested. It seems like a majority of women have been victims of sexual assault. But I don't think you're at a high risk of it by walking or jogging along a busy public street just because there are some catcalls and honks.
  • HardcoreP0rk
    HardcoreP0rk Posts: 936 Member
    I agree the attention I get is Obscene ;)

    Pfft... inorite?!?!

    I've been beating off men with a stick as long as I can remember. If hadnt learn to tune it out by now, Id never get anything done :drinker:
  • Try to ignore them. You are out for you and your physical/mental well-being. Enjoy getting out into the fresh air whether its running the roads or on your bike and don't let ****heads ruin your training. Remember you are better than them.
  • zoodocgirl
    zoodocgirl Posts: 163 Member
    this thread has taken a serious turn for the worse. for goodness sake even the OP wasn't concerned about being physically assaulted. by her own words she was made to feel uncomfortable by comments that passerby would make as she was running. I'm firmly in the "suck it up, buttercup" camp, but i can understand how people feel differently.

    so someone PUHLEEEZE tell me how a thread that was basically "sticks and stones will break my bones but words can never hurt me" has turned into fear mongering rape thread? yes, rape is a serious and pervasive threat, but this wasn't a rape thread. "nice *kitten*!" yelled from a car window is neither rape nor a sign of impending assault.

    But here's the thing: the woman you are yelling "nice *kitten*!" at does not KNOW you. She doesn't KNOW your intention. She doesn't KNOW your history. The assault statistics reported above are not inflated. They are real. Most women (most people, actually, if they bothered to ask) know several other women who have been raped or assaulted or at least had an attempt made, so we have to be on our guard.

    Whether or not your intention is just to make a catcall or to escalate that into something more, the person you are directing this at has no way of knowing. On a more basic level, it all still stems from the same cultural attitude where men feel they have a RIGHT to sexualize a complete stranger. Would you say "nice *kitten*!" to your college professor, or to your child's teacher, or to your doctor? No. Because it's disrespectful. I'm out here running because I'm running. Not because I have any interest in being your eye candy. If you want to be complimentary and supportive, and you feel you need to inflict yourself on to a complete stranger, support their EFFORT ("keep it up!" "you're doing great!") instead of diminishing everything about that person to their sexual attractiveness.
  • amysj303
    amysj303 Posts: 5,086 Member
    It's British slang, dude.

    g'day to you too, friend!

    It's "MATE". Get it right.

    Whoa there! No one is asking to mate. Now you're the one being creepy. Slow down and get to know the guy first.


    I run at 5:30 am and it's pretty rare for me to see much of anyone.

    srsly, i hardly know ye!

    We can fix that...

    tumblr_m141ifXgY41rqfhi2o1_250.gif
  • RllyGudTweetr
    RllyGudTweetr Posts: 2,019 Member
    Here's some helpful information for those who are totally ignorant on the subject:

    1 in 5 women have been raped according to the CDC. Of those, 12% were raped before age 11. 1in 4 women have been the victim of violence from a partner.

    http://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/nisvs_factsheet-a.pdf

    Here is a helpful graphic and information about the graphic. One important thing to note about this is that false rape reports are low (about 2%) and VERY VERY VERY RARELY does a false report of rape ever name the perp. Most false rapes reported are reports of stranger rapes.

    http://theenlivenproject.com/the-truth-about-false-accusation/

    And these are the ones that are REPORTED. Many women don't report being raped.
    And children can't.
    Do you have statistics on the number of unreported rapes? How were they derived?

    You have access to google. Look it up. Generally tho, the term "reported" means reported to the police. The CDC study may actually include rapes not reported to the police, but reported in other ways (sociological studies, perhaps.... Or perhaps from rape crisis centers or from counselors).
    I ask because the very nature of "unreported rapes" makes them all but impossible to compile statistically. I ask because I have had professors and "workplace harassment workshop leaders" throw numbers at the classes/workshop I was in that indicated that 7 out of every 5 women were rape victims. That's not a typo: they presented numbers indicating that more than 100% of women had been raped, *not* counting women who were attacked more than once. This was not an isolated incident of one person who didn't understand how to read statistics, because it was multiple people in multiple settings.

    You do understand why I am somewhat skeptical of these numbers?
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    this thread has taken a serious turn for the worse. for goodness sake even the OP wasn't concerned about being physically assaulted. by her own words she was made to feel uncomfortable by comments that passerby would make as she was running. I'm firmly in the "suck it up, buttercup" camp, but i can understand how people feel differently.

    so someone PUHLEEEZE tell me how a thread that was basically "sticks and stones will break my bones but words can never hurt me" has turned into fear mongering rape thread? yes, rape is a serious and pervasive threat, but this wasn't a rape thread. "nice *kitten*!" yelled from a car window is neither rape nor a sign of impending assault.

    But here's the thing: the woman you are yelling "nice *kitten*!" at does not KNOW you. She doesn't KNOW your intention. She doesn't KNOW your history. The assault statistics reported above are not inflated. They are real. Most women (most people, actually, if they bothered to ask) know several other women who have been raped or assaulted or at least had an attempt made, so we have to be on our guard.

    Whether or not your intention is just to make a catcall or to escalate that into something more, the person you are directing this at has no way of knowing. On a more basic level, it all still stems from the same cultural attitude where men feel they have a RIGHT to sexualize a complete stranger. Would you say "nice *kitten*!" to your college professor, or to your child's teacher, or to your doctor? No. Because it's disrespectful. I'm out here running because I'm running. Not because I have any interest in being your eye candy. If you want to be complimentary and supportive, and you feel you need to inflict yourself on to a complete stranger, support their EFFORT ("keep it up!" "you're doing great!") instead of diminishing everything about that person to their sexual attractiveness.

    you're right. all women should assume all men are going to rape them all the time. and every conversation about anything should turn to a conversation about rape, because rape is all that happens in the world, ever. it's not a question of have you been raped, it's have you been raped YET. so yes, you're jogging down a public street in broad daylight and there are dozens of witnesses, but you damn well be protecting yourself because if someone yells "Nice rack!" they are probably going to rape you right there in the middle of Main Street at 4pm.

    because rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape






    and rape
  • zoodocgirl
    zoodocgirl Posts: 163 Member
    http://www.buzzfeed.com/katieheaney/why-women-find-compliments-offensive

    I particularly like the comments about being told to "Smile, baby," by complete strangers.
  • UrbanLotus
    UrbanLotus Posts: 1,163 Member
    this thread has taken a serious turn for the worse. for goodness sake even the OP wasn't concerned about being physically assaulted. by her own words she was made to feel uncomfortable by comments that passerby would make as she was running. I'm firmly in the "suck it up, buttercup" camp, but i can understand how people feel differently.

    so someone PUHLEEEZE tell me how a thread that was basically "sticks and stones will break my bones but words can never hurt me" has turned into fear mongering rape thread? yes, rape is a serious and pervasive threat, but this wasn't a rape thread. "nice *kitten*!" yelled from a car window is neither rape nor a sign of impending assault.

    But here's the thing: the woman you are yelling "nice *kitten*!" at does not KNOW you. She doesn't KNOW your intention. She doesn't KNOW your history. The assault statistics reported above are not inflated. They are real. Most women (most people, actually, if they bothered to ask) know several other women who have been raped or assaulted or at least had an attempt made, so we have to be on our guard.

    Whether or not your intention is just to make a catcall or to escalate that into something more, the person you are directing this at has no way of knowing. On a more basic level, it all still stems from the same cultural attitude where men feel they have a RIGHT to sexualize a complete stranger. Would you say "nice *kitten*!" to your college professor, or to your child's teacher, or to your doctor? No. Because it's disrespectful. I'm out here running because I'm running. Not because I have any interest in being your eye candy. If you want to be complimentary and supportive, and you feel you need to inflict yourself on to a complete stranger, support their EFFORT ("keep it up!" "you're doing great!") instead of diminishing everything about that person to their sexual attractiveness.

    you're right. all women should assume all men are going to rape them all the time. and every conversation about anything should turn to a conversation about rape, because rape is all that happens in the world, ever. it's not a question of have you been raped, it's have you been raped YET. so yes, you're jogging down a public street in broad daylight and there are dozens of witnesses, but you damn well be protecting yourself because if someone yells "Nice rack!" they are probably going to rape you right there in the middle of Main Street at 4pm.

    because rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape






    and rape

    Is that what she said??? Damn, apparently I can't read!
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    oh boy...
  • InnerConflict
    InnerConflict Posts: 1,592 Member
    No, I'm not saying that people on here not agreeing with me is harassment.... I'm saying that old guys saying stuff from their vans is harassment.

    So do you NOT consider it pervy if the guys are young?

    Exactly how old are you anyway?
  • RobynLB83
    RobynLB83 Posts: 626 Member
    Just put on your big girl shoes and run-- random pervy old men be damned. I whistle at hot men when I drive by. I don't think they mind. Does that make me a pervy old lady?
  • RhineDHP
    RhineDHP Posts: 1,025 Member
    Wow what did I come back to?
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
    Wow what did I come back to?

    The Smith College reunion thread
  • FromHereOnOut
    FromHereOnOut Posts: 3,237 Member
    doesn't anyone have the power to kill this thread? pls put it out of its misery. i think op got the answers she was looking for (and then some).

    48_rock-bottum.gif
  • InnerConflict
    InnerConflict Posts: 1,592 Member
    doesn't anyone have the power to kill this thread? pls put it out of its misery. i think op got the answers she was looking for (and then some).

    Nope, no one with any power here. They are all driving around in van honking at young female jiggers. Damn Pervs
  • DonnaRe2012
    DonnaRe2012 Posts: 298 Member
    This may sound creepy, but I'm pretty sure no one will say anything. I see people running in the cemetary.
  • BeachGingerOnTheRocks
    BeachGingerOnTheRocks Posts: 3,927 Member
    Okay so I was out and about yesterday and this guy chased me down to hand me a flyer to sign up for a bikini contest next Friday night.

    That was pretty cool.

    Carry on.
  • RainHoward
    RainHoward Posts: 1,599 Member
    Okay so I was out and about yesterday and this guy chased me down to hand me a flyer to sign up for a bikini contest next Friday night.

    That was pretty cool.

    Carry on.
    how do we get tickets to that event????
  • InnerConflict
    InnerConflict Posts: 1,592 Member
    This may sound creepy, but I'm pretty sure no one will say anything. I see people running in the cemetary.

    tumblr_m1vazomZXn1rsj1bjo1_500.gif
  • mommylifter
    mommylifter Posts: 123
    The simple fact that they now make running pants with built in gun holsters in the back waist band makes me refuse to go out for a run. Forget the pervs, I'm too scared of what else is out there....
  • InnerConflict
    InnerConflict Posts: 1,592 Member
    Okay so I was out and about yesterday and this guy chased me down to hand me a flyer to sign up for a bikini contest next Friday night.

    That was pretty cool.

    Carry on.

    You certainly rock a bikini
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    Okay so I was out and about yesterday and this guy chased me down to hand me a flyer to sign up for a bikini contest next Friday night.

    That was pretty cool.

    Carry on.

    Woo Hoo!! :drinker:
  • CorvusCorax77
    CorvusCorax77 Posts: 2,536 Member
    Wow what did I come back to?

    The Smith College reunion thread

    Cornell grad here.
  • CorvusCorax77
    CorvusCorax77 Posts: 2,536 Member
    Here's some helpful information for those who are totally ignorant on the subject:

    1 in 5 women have been raped according to the CDC. Of those, 12% were raped before age 11. 1in 4 women have been the victim of violence from a partner.

    http://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/nisvs_factsheet-a.pdf

    Here is a helpful graphic and information about the graphic. One important thing to note about this is that false rape reports are low (about 2%) and VERY VERY VERY RARELY does a false report of rape ever name the perp. Most false rapes reported are reports of stranger rapes.

    http://theenlivenproject.com/the-truth-about-false-accusation/

    And these are the ones that are REPORTED. Many women don't report being raped.
    And children can't.
    Do you have statistics on the number of unreported rapes? How were they derived?

    You have access to google. Look it up. Generally tho, the term "reported" means reported to the police. The CDC study may actually include rapes not reported to the police, but reported in other ways (sociological studies, perhaps.... Or perhaps from rape crisis centers or from counselors).
    I ask because the very nature of "unreported rapes" makes them all but impossible to compile statistically. I ask because I have had professors and "workplace harassment workshop leaders" throw numbers at the classes/workshop I was in that indicated that 7 out of every 5 women were rape victims. That's not a typo: they presented numbers indicating that more than 100% of women had been raped, *not* counting women who were attacked more than once. This was not an isolated incident of one person who didn't understand how to read statistics, because it was multiple people in multiple settings.

    You do understand why I am somewhat skeptical of these numbers?

    Yes of course I understand. It isn't more than 100%. I know at least one woman who wasn't raped, molested, or beaten. It does happen. And it doesn't help anyone to throw out numbers that are completely off- especially when something is already a very verifiable epidemic.

    One thing I think is good to note- the average rapist racks up six victims. Just because a disturbingly large number of women have been sexually assaulted does not mean a disturbingly large number of men are rapists. I don't think anyone has been trying to say that (despit Davpaul's ignorant post here). What *is* common, and totally logical, is for women who have experienced sexual violence or sexually motivated violence to be a bit fearful. I don't think it's "rape mongering" (this is in response to dav not you) to talk about something that is a serious problem.

    I agree this is a bit off topic from OP .... But not really if she is scared of sexual harassment. Harassment that is sexually motivated is part of a spectrum of sexually motivated antisocial behavior which includes rape and murder. No, it's not rape and of course people who engage in harassment may have a moral compass that would prevent them from physically harming someone. I think the point one poster here may be trying to make is that some who engage in sexual harassment may be ignorant of how it can e harmful even if they never touch the woman- perhaps their behavior isn't antisocial but just simply ignorance.
  • CorvusCorax77
    CorvusCorax77 Posts: 2,536 Member
    this thread has taken a serious turn for the worse. for goodness sake even the OP wasn't concerned about being physically assaulted. by her own words she was made to feel uncomfortable by comments that passerby would make as she was running. I'm firmly in the "suck it up, buttercup" camp, but i can understand how people feel differently.

    so someone PUHLEEEZE tell me how a thread that was basically "sticks and stones will break my bones but words can never hurt me" has turned into fear mongering rape thread? yes, rape is a serious and pervasive threat, but this wasn't a rape thread. "nice *kitten*!" yelled from a car window is neither rape nor a sign of impending assault.

    But here's the thing: the woman you are yelling "nice *kitten*!" at does not KNOW you. She doesn't KNOW your intention. She doesn't KNOW your history. The assault statistics reported above are not inflated. They are real. Most women (most people, actually, if they bothered to ask) know several other women who have been raped or assaulted or at least had an attempt made, so we have to be on our guard.

    Whether or not your intention is just to make a catcall or to escalate that into something more, the person you are directing this at has no way of knowing. On a more basic level, it all still stems from the same cultural attitude where men feel they have a RIGHT to sexualize a complete stranger. Would you say "nice *kitten*!" to your college professor, or to your child's teacher, or to your doctor? No. Because it's disrespectful. I'm out here running because I'm running. Not because I have any interest in being your eye candy. If you want to be complimentary and supportive, and you feel you need to inflict yourself on to a complete stranger, support their EFFORT ("keep it up!" "you're doing great!") instead of diminishing everything about that person to their sexual attractiveness.

    you're right. all women should assume all men are going to rape them all the time. and every conversation about anything should turn to a conversation about rape, because rape is all that happens in the world, ever. it's not a question of have you been raped, it's have you been raped YET. so yes, you're jogging down a public street in broad daylight and there are dozens of witnesses, but you damn well be protecting yourself because if someone yells "Nice rack!" they are probably going to rape you right there in the middle of Main Street at 4pm.

    because rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape rape






    and rape

    It is called PTSD. You may have heard it mentioned in the news at some point in the last 40 years since Vietnam???

    You also totally ignored her other point about not sexualizing a perfect stranger.

    But yeah sure. Obviously some women in this thread have experienced rape so you want to be a gentleman and say rape a bunch of times because *kitten*

    *kitten* *kitten* *kitten* *kitten* *kitten*....
This discussion has been closed.