Partner hates me using MFP :(

I've started using MFP a couple of months ago, and I realized that I was addicted so far. After 1 month logging everything like crazy, I decided to stop it and try to follow my willing to eat by myself. The results were that I've started losing weight. Now I can use MFP again, without feeling so addicted because I'm confident that I can do it. I can use MFP like a spreadsheet to help me controlling what I ate, without losing my mind trying to keep on track of small things.

And please ignore the people saying he is jealous or a douche or giving you a right to be selfish.

If you in a relationship and anything your doing is bothering your partner don't just dismiss it. Logging food and stressing about food can be very obsessive and stressful for both parties. Your always crunching numbers and on your phone or the computer day in and day out and the other person has experience that with you anytime food becomes an issue.

Like the other person that had a meltdown at her anniversary dinner because the menu at the restaurant changed. I'm sure that distressed her husband watching her have that reaction over food as it did her.

You have to learn to keep track but also be flexible. So if your being on MFP is taking time away from your partner or distressing them in terms of enjoying time with you, find a way to balance both out.

dear scpdxb,
food for thought for you in hopes that you can reconcile some of the guilty feelings you're having. would your partner rather you track, or would your partner rather see you have a heart attack. would your partner rather you track, or would your partner rather you see you with high blood pressure. the list goes on and on.

i used to work for weight watchers (5 years) and there are about a dozen reasons why those we love have this type of reaction. bottom line is what do you think is good and healthy in YOUR life. i've done this food and exercise game all my life (i'm 40), and for me personally i track everything as well. when i stop paying attention, i stop tracking, when i stop tracking, i feel uncomfortable and unhappy with the way i feel, move, look, etc. if you need to track. then track. i saw one smart gal on here saying she does take some weekend breaks....that's very healthy and i do that too.

it's hard to do it, but we have to differentiate someone else's guilt vs. our own, and you don't own this. you're not doing anything wrong. there are WAY worse things that you could be doing. what you're doing is helping yourself be healthy, happy, and feeling good. my wish for you is that your partner see the good intent behind what you're doing and support you on your journey.

best of luck

Hi I do the same. I am constantly on MFP..I think it is addicting! LOL And yes my husband hates it! He is a skinny minny with a metabolism that does not stop. He has no ideal how hard it is to have to loose even a lb never mind watch what you are eating, exercise and see the scale stay the same or even go up a bit. I try to stay away from the MFP when he is around (as much as possible anyway) and log in when he is outside or gone out...no arguments, no guilt!

MFP is an education tool. The 'obsessive' logging eases off and will be replaced by 'normal people' healthy eating and exercise once you become more innately aware of the values of what you're eating. Hubby just needs to understand that the obsessive logging is just a part of the education process to living a overall long term healthy lifestyle.

Exactly this. And to learn, you have to read and think about it and study it and calculate it. Ignorance of what to eat, how much to eat, what exercise to get and how much we need every day is a large part of either being overweight or being unable to maintain a healthy weight.

My partner and I have just had a huge row over me using MFP - he says it is making me obsessive and doesn't understand why I can't just eat healthily and exercise like 'normal people'. I log everything, down to a mint or cup of coffee, and he thinks it is crazy. I love MFP, it helps me stay on track and I know that without it I would over eat because I wouldn't be so conscious, but now I am thinking maybe I should stop using it and see how I go just estimating calories and exercise - or as he suggests stop thinking about it and just 'exercise and stay away from burgers' - what do you guys think? Anyone ever feel like logging everything is a bit obsessive?

Hubby used to be the same way, but after seeing my success he asked me to log for him too and he is now losing.

I keeps you accountable. Best thing ever for me but not just because I can keep track of my calories but ensure I have a well balanced meal plan instead of the lopsided one other "diets" seem to lure you into. I am a little obsessed also with tracking almost everything that goes in my mouth (maybe not a breath mint but it works for me and if it does for you then don't stop.

Perhaps he is feeling a bit left out or ignored as you are using your phone much more than usual when you're together? I know I am, and this is a good wake up call that I need to keep it in check. I'm enjoying doing it because it appeals to my OCD side...but I know it drives me crazy when my hubby is always on his phone...especially at meal times!!!

How about setting aside time when you are alone to log, either a couple times a day or once a day?

I agree with this...it's new and different and takes up extra time. show him all around the site then tell him how much you feel it helps you. He'll get used to it.
Don't let him stop you doing this if you like it- or anything else for that matter.

^^^totally this! My husband has been The most supportive partners I could have ever asked for..even at 370 pounds, he hated what it did to my personality, being that large and depressed, but, he loved me through it. Through every journey point, every milestone, every NSV he has rejoiced with me.

That said...he has made comments about how much I have been on my phone. For me, MFP has been an wonderful motivational tool. I was introduced to a great community of people who were going exactly where I wanted to go, who are where I used to be, or who had reached the destination point I want so badly to be at! For my hubby, I think he just feels left out sometimes. So, I make it a point to do what should be obvious...I give him all my attention when he comes home from work, then after dinner, I catch up...when he's playing with Facebook on his phone, lol.

If you want my opinion/advice...have a specific conversation about why it bothers him and how you can make him feel more loved without giving up on something that is helping you become healthier.

Best wishes to you and yours.

I'm learning to log in the morning, at night, and if I'm dealing with a meal that I'm uncertain about and don't want to go overboard with. My guy is very supportive.

I don't agree with the people who are saying he is jealous or obsessive. We don't know anything about either of you.

I agree with Slinky. I'd start by thanking him for being concerned about you and then explain to him that you wish you could just eat and not have to log to be healthy, but that hasn't worked for you in the past. Be honest with yourself if your logging does get intrusive and figure out a way around it.

Yes