school says granddaughter too fat

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  • rubixcyoob
    rubixcyoob Posts: 395
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    i hate that schools weigh children!!!!! for one thing i think it is not the schools place to tell parents how tocare for there kids and also, it is cruel to the children, who probably worry a lot about being weighed. They just strted to bring this in during my later school years, i paid my brother to go for me, or just plain refused, but i younger child couldnt probably easily do that. If I have kids, I will tell the school i am NOT having my child weighed and will even make sure they arent in school that day if need be. I just so strongly disagree eith it. You should just manage your childs health in the best way you can,in the family and with a dr, as you always have done, and ignore the schools attempt to butt in. I hope your poor daughter is OK xxxx

    This is why there is such a problem with obeseity nowadays.

    Managing someone's health the 'best way you can' doesn't always equate to the 'best way'. If a family thinks that processed, high sugar, low nutrient food is good because it has low calories, that doesn't mean it is best.
    Doctors don't always pick up on such issues.
  • Ghkffb56
    Ghkffb56 Posts: 263 Member
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    ugh... idk what to even say tbh.... when did schools tell parents how to raise their kids?..
  • JBott84
    JBott84 Posts: 268 Member
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    Take her to her pediatrician. If the Dr. agrees with the school that she is indeed obese then you should worry and do something about it. If not problem solved.

    Children being obese is a serious situation and should be treated as such. You shouldn't ignore it just because you don't agree. If you think she is fine, take her to the Dr. get a note to prove that to the school. That will stop the whole thing, but ignoring it won't work. If you ignore it the school can assume that you are ignoring concern for her health and can report you; that is their right and part of their job. They are mandated to do so. Even though it might strike you as rude or invasive, they are trying to help.
  • kelleybean1
    kelleybean1 Posts: 312 Member
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    I really don't "get" the outrage. Would you be offended if you got a letter that your child might have a vision problem? Or dental? Why is weight so taboo??? She's 4, she's not being humiliated in any way. Why not just take her to the dr. for a second opinion and be done with it? Now you at least know to keep and eye on a potential problem.
  • victoriavoodoo
    victoriavoodoo Posts: 343 Member
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    People need to be less quick to take offense. Even if the system isn't perfect and some kids will be put in the obese category mistakenly, better have a system that is over-sensitive than one that lets kids who need help slip through the cracks.
  • Ghkffb56
    Ghkffb56 Posts: 263 Member
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    I really don't "get" the outrage. Would you be offended if you got a letter that your child might have a vision problem? Or dental? Why is weight so taboo??? She's 4, she's not being humiliated in any way. Why not just take her to the dr. for a second opinion and be done with it? Now you at least know to keep and eye on a potential problem.

    shes 4. But she still knows everything thats going on. Most girls who get called fat at a young age will always have it in the back of their head. I know i did.. and Thats how my eating disorder started. Idk i guess i wasnt as strong. I still think adults needs to watch what they say/do to kids.. it sticks with them forever.
  • RunEatLift
    RunEatLift Posts: 68
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    A disgrace, it's no wonder that cases of eating disorders are rising if children are being taught to think that they are 'obese' or 'fat' at such a young age.
  • Ghkffb56
    Ghkffb56 Posts: 263 Member
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    A disgrace, it's no wonder that cases of eating disorders are rising if children are being taught to think that they are 'obese' or 'fat' at such a young age.

    ty cant agree more. ^^
  • schondell
    schondell Posts: 556 Member
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    A disgrace, it's no wonder that cases of eating disorders are rising if children are being taught to think that they are 'obese' or 'fat' at such a young age.

    This is not how eating disorders are caused.
  • victoriavoodoo
    victoriavoodoo Posts: 343 Member
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    I really don't "get" the outrage. Would you be offended if you got a letter that your child might have a vision problem? Or dental? Why is weight so taboo??? She's 4, she's not being humiliated in any way. Why not just take her to the dr. for a second opinion and be done with it? Now you at least know to keep and eye on a potential problem.

    shes 4. But she still knows everything thats going on. Most girls who get called fat at a young age will always have it in the back of their head. I know i did.. and Thats how my eating disorder started. Idk i guess i wasnt as strong. I still think adults needs to watch what they say/do to kids.. it sticks with them forever.

    How do we know they said anything to the kid? If they just sent a note home(and chances are either the note was sealed or the child can't read or both) seems like the only way she'd find out is if family told her. Even if she read the word obese, she isn't going to equate that with fat.
  • RunEatLift
    RunEatLift Posts: 68
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    A disgrace, it's no wonder that cases of eating disorders are rising if children are being taught to think that they are 'obese' or 'fat' at such a young age.

    This is not how eating disorders are caused.

    Of course that's not how they're caused, I didn't say that. What I meant was that ever more focus is being put on body image and personal appearance. If a child is labeled as 'obese' that's something they're going to remember. They feel different, as if they aren't normal and that their body should be changed to fit with society's view of what is acceptable.
  • Ghkffb56
    Ghkffb56 Posts: 263 Member
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    I really don't "get" the outrage. Would you be offended if you got a letter that your child might have a vision problem? Or dental? Why is weight so taboo??? She's 4, she's not being humiliated in any way. Why not just take her to the dr. for a second opinion and be done with it? Now you at least know to keep and eye on a potential problem.

    shes 4. But she still knows everything thats going on. Most girls who get called fat at a young age will always have it in the back of their head. I know i did.. and Thats how my eating disorder started. Idk i guess i wasnt as strong. I still think adults needs to watch what they say/do to kids.. it sticks with them forever.

    How do we know they said anything to the kid? If they just sent a note home(and chances are either the note was sealed or the child can't read or both) seems like the only way she'd find out is if family told her. Even if she read the word obese, she isn't going to equate that with fat.

    It goes both ways QT. how do we know they didn't? Kids are alot smarter then they look. And adults are just as bad as kids.. they could have been talking in the office, saying she is over weight and to send a note home.. Idk .. we can agree to disagree i guess. but i can also see where you are coming from as well.
  • california_peach
    california_peach Posts: 1,858 Member
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    Why are they weighing the kids at school? That alone seems odd. Ultimately, take her to her doctor and let the school know that you have it handled. In the future I would decline any such medical examinations of this nature and deal directly with your own doctor.
  • sluedu09
    sluedu09 Posts: 107 Member
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    Typically these types of letters are not handed to the kid with the message "Hey, you're fat." That's not how it works. These letters usually go home enclosed in an envelope for the parents to read. The letters do not call kids names. Most kids (like the 4 year old) do not know what obese means. It's not in their vocabulary yet. Now, if their parent sits them down and says, "Honey, I got a letter from the school today saying you're obese, which means your fat", that's a different story. Once that letter goes home it's up to the parents to decide how to handle in. In no way (if it's done correctly) do schools send letters home calling children names. I don't thin a lot of you have ever received one of these letters and you're interpreting it wrong. Especially since the OP says the school said her GD is too fat...that is absolutely not how it goes.
  • mkzara
    mkzara Posts: 73 Member
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    Except children are obese and fat at such young ages....

    Parents (not the OP) are failing their children in so many ways when they set them up to be overweight for their lives and to struggle with diseases, all because they didn't want someone telling them their kid was fat.

    My brother has so many health issues that would be better if my mom cooked healthier from an earlier age. I am only now losing weight, and even though I was never obese my brother was for years.

    I think all the outrage is over the fact that people are being showed a mirror to their obvious failures. A child cannot be faulted for being obese or overweight, but their parents certainly should be. People can bury their heads in the sand and say their kids aren't obese when the fact of the matter is that most of those kids are obese.

    So a school sending a letter saying that you should take a look at your kid is suddenly offensive. It's a guilty conscience. If it wasn't people would talk to their kids' pediatrician and be done with it. No need for self righteous anger and rudeness.
  • victoriavoodoo
    victoriavoodoo Posts: 343 Member
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    Why are they weighing the kids at school? That alone seems odd. Ultimately, take her to her doctor and let the school know that you have it handled. In the future I would decline any such medical examinations of this nature and deal directly with your own doctor.


    I got weighed every year by my school, just like at the end of each year we had to pass a physical fitness test in PE, and I think not being able to do chin ups or touch your toes or climb a rope in front of everyone is alot more humiliating than being weighed where only the gym teacher and you can see.
    All the schools in my parish do this(southern Louisiana).
  • victoriavoodoo
    victoriavoodoo Posts: 343 Member
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    Typically these types of letters are not handed to the kid with the message "Hey, you're fat." That's not how it works. These letters usually go home enclosed in an envelope for the parents to read. The letters do not call kids names. Most kids (like the 4 year old) do not know what obese means. It's not in their vocabulary yet. Now, if their parent sits them down and says, "Honey, I got a letter from the school today saying you're obese, which means your fat", that's a different story. Once that letter goes home it's up to the parents to decide how to handle in. In no way (if it's done correctly) do schools send letters home calling children names. I don't thin a lot of you have ever received one of these letters and you're interpreting it wrong. Especially since the OP says the school said her GD is too fat...that is absolutely not how it goes.

    Exactly.
  • sluedu09
    sluedu09 Posts: 107 Member
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    Why are they weighing the kids at school? That alone seems odd. Ultimately, take her to her doctor and let the school know that you have it handled. In the future I would decline any such medical examinations of this nature and deal directly with your own doctor.


    I got weighed every year by my school, just like at the end of each year we had to pass a physical fitness test in PE, and I think not being able to do chin ups or touch your toes or climb a rope in front of everyone is alot more humiliating than being weighed where only the gym teacher and you can see.
    All the schools in my parish do this(southern Louisiana).


    I agree with you on the chin ups and stuff. I wish they would have the rest of the class doing another activity and pull kids over one-by-one to do that. I hated doing that stuff in front of others...especially in middle school.
  • chelseabuns88
    chelseabuns88 Posts: 77 Member
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    I just don't get it, why is everyone so much more obsessed with a number on the scale and a chart.. than a balanced diet and active lifestyle?

    Does is matter about the number? Really? I understand from a schooling perspective, if that's the policy so be it and it's nice to have a reference when discussing 'issues' with parents of children in their care, rather than calling a kid 'fat' and risking the backlash from upset parents.. but is it really a good idea to weigh children regularly.. it sounds like it may spur obsessive behaviours and encourage eating disorders and self-esteem issues.. which can lead to polar opposite consequences, neither being healthy.

    And does anyone here know enough about child dev to make such judgemental statements.. other than a chart they saw online?

    I'm not saying obesity isn't an issue and I totally get on board with getting on top of weight issues before they spiral out of control, especially for the child's sake. but really.. is an outside body keeping tabs on weight really going to help matters when it's at the sole discretion of the family what they feed their child and the activities they pursue?

    Just throw out the scales, buy some fresh food, turn off the TV and get outside!
  • kiachu
    kiachu Posts: 409 Member
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    My daughter's school sent home a note with concern about a rash on her face, that I didn't think was that big of a deal and i would be able to manage it at home, and the Nurse even called me next day and TOLD me she should go to her doctor ASAP. Told me to make an appointment to get her to the doctor like the next day when I was talking about doing it a week out. You know what, I did, and let's just it was way more serious than I had thought.


    That damn nanny state! :ohwell:

    And when I was in school we got checked for headline, our back was checked any curvatures, we had ear, eye, and dental screenings.

    Always telling people to butt out but let some lawyer figure out a way that you can sue a school because they sat on information that your child had a weight problem. $$$$

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