Sexual Orientation Changed Through Reparative Therapy?

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Replies

  • songbyrdsweet
    songbyrdsweet Posts: 5,691 Member
    Homosexuality is as innate is heterosexuality. Why anyone would believe sexuality is a choice is beyond me. It's like a straight person one day deciding to just not be straight anymore. Ridiculous. It doesn't work that way. Ignorance!
  • ladymiseryali
    ladymiseryali Posts: 2,555 Member
    Reparative "therapy" is bull-ploppers. I would like to ask Dr. Oz when he chose to be straight. The man's a quack.
  • merkuri22
    merkuri22 Posts: 13 Member
    No.
    I don't get this logic.
    "Abuse by the same sex makes you gay!"
    "Abuse by the opposite sex makes you gay!"
    wat.

    Abuse might make you not want to sleep with men, but it doesn't necessarily make you gay.

    A man can wear a dress. Does that make him a woman? No, it makes him a man dressing like a woman.

    Gay is who you are, not what (or who) you do.
  • Umeboshi
    Umeboshi Posts: 1,637 Member
    No.
    I don't get this logic.
    "Abuse by the same sex makes you gay!"
    "Abuse by the opposite sex makes you gay!"
    wat.

    Abuse might make you not want to sleep with men, but it doesn't necessarily make you gay.

    A man can wear a dress. Does that make him a woman? No, it makes him a man dressing like a woman.

    Gay is who you are, not what (or who) you do.

    I think you were getting transphobic there.
  • mjrkearney
    mjrkearney Posts: 408 Member
    Unfortunately a lot of these "therapies" for sexual orientation or gender identification border on brainwashing and torture. They tend to be based on a religious or cultural belief that your sex chromosomes should determine who you are, how you feel about yourself, and how you see the world.
  • monty619
    monty619 Posts: 1,308 Member
    anyone think that in some circumstances sexual orientation can be the result of abuse by older males at a young age?

    I would say for some men, yes. I say this because I know some men for whom this has been the case... their experiences began as children, with other boys/teens somewhat older... Seemingly innocent. But then there's pleasure and there's shame... all rolled up into one. That becomes the thing that's comforting to them, but there's shame associated and they tend to carry on healthy relationships with women. So for them, I'd say they weren't born gay. I can't say others aren't though.

    this is how i feel where therapy may be somewhat useful?
  • CarmenSRT
    CarmenSRT Posts: 843 Member
    Straight people don't choose to be straight. They just are. Why would gay people be any different as far as choosing their sexuality? It wouldn't make sense.

    My mother-in-law thinks gays chose their orientation - but that's because it fits her religious views. No amount of logic will sway her from that view because she's more comfortable seeing gay people as sinners than as merely different.
  • Umeboshi
    Umeboshi Posts: 1,637 Member
    anyone think that in some circumstances sexual orientation can be the result of abuse by older males at a young age?

    I would say for some men, yes. I say this because I know some men for whom this has been the case... their experiences began as children, with other boys/teens somewhat older... Seemingly innocent. But then there's pleasure and there's shame... all rolled up into one. That becomes the thing that's comforting to them, but there's shame associated and they tend to carry on healthy relationships with women. So for them, I'd say they weren't born gay. I can't say others aren't though.

    this is how i feel where therapy may be somewhat useful?

    I'm pretty sure therapy is useful for all persons who have suffered abuse? The usefulness of therapy isn't going to magically change a person's sexual orientation.
  • FlaxMilk
    FlaxMilk Posts: 3,452 Member
    Would this not be considered a divisive topic?

    (Didn't report. Not going to report. Just don't get why this topic is ok and others are not.)
  • michellekicks
    michellekicks Posts: 3,624 Member
    Would this not be considered a divisive topic?

    (Didn't report. Not going to report. Just don't get why this topic is ok and others are not.)

    So far the conversation seems quite respectable.
  • I didn't choose to be gay, it wasn't a' lifestyle choice' that I made for myself...I just am me! I think this kind of therapy preys on the vulnerable, they don't need therapy to try and changechange, they just need therapy to accept themselves as they already are.
  • FlaxMilk
    FlaxMilk Posts: 3,452 Member
    Would this not be considered a divisive topic?

    (Didn't report. Not going to report. Just don't get why this topic is ok and others are not.)

    So far the conversation seems quite respectable.

    Sure, just more confused about the guidelines since other threads get shut down based solely on the topic and not how the thread is actually going. I won't derail (or I'll stop derailing), just didn't want to ask a mod since I didn't want to get this thread shut down. :laugh:
  • Umeboshi
    Umeboshi Posts: 1,637 Member
    I didn't choose to be gay, it wasn't a' lifestyle choice' that I made for myself...I just am me! I think this kind of therapy preys on the vulnerable, they don't need therapy to try and changechange, they just need therapy to accept themselves as they already are.

    :flowerforyou:
  • BaconMD
    BaconMD Posts: 1,165 Member
    So I recently happened to catch this controversial topic on an episode of Dr. Oz.

    I am very tolerant and completely accepting of an individual's sexual orientation. For years I have believed that one is born gay just the same as one who is born straight. The Dr. Oz show, however, presented the premise that one is not born gay but rather is influenced by different societal factors and life experiences which can be undone through so-called reparative therapy. The practice has been banned in California for minors and remains extremely controversial.

    It has apparently worked changing some men from gay to straight (including marrying women and starting a family) while others have experienced depression and suicidal thoughts as a result of the therapy. This has caused me to possibly re-think my own beliefs about the root cause of being gay. I think I still believe it is something one is born with similar to being born with black or white skin. It just is.

    At the end of the day, however, I'll continue to respect differences and treat gay individuals with the same respect I treat straight individuals. I'm simply fascinated by the topic as it completely goes against everything I have believed my entire life about an individual being born gay.

    The goal is not to bash gays so if that is your response I trust the moderator will appropriately deal with you. I'm genuinely interested in this issue given that I live and work in the San Francisco Bay Area and have family members who are gay and would possibly consider such therapy for many reasons.
    Not to be rude, but this is a fitness website. Please keep this to the groups, I'm sure there are plenty of Dr. Oz-based groups on here.
  • Homosexuality is common in the animal kingdom. It is observed in over 1500 species, from primates to worms. Obviously not all of these are social species, so a reasonable conclusion is that social influences don't play a role in selection.

    The phenomenon is so common that some animals have a predictable rate of homosexual individuals within their populations. Such as with domesticated sheep, about 10% of males refuse to mate with females but will readily mate with other males, exclusively - for their entire lives.



    ****STAFF NOTE: Post has been edited due to violations of guideline #04****
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/welcome/guidelines
  • nikilis
    nikilis Posts: 2,305 Member
    why would anyone want to do that. its wack.
  • tehzephyrsong
    tehzephyrsong Posts: 435 Member
    I've never thought there was any conscious choice when it came to this kind of thing. Which also means that there's nothing that can really be done to effect a lasting change in sexual preference. Just as no amount of therapy will make me (a straight woman) suddenly stop being attracted to men, no amount of therapy will make a lesbian suddenly stop being attracted to women.

    The best response I've found for people who still insist that homosexuality is a choice is this. Why would anyone consciously choose to be gay, to purposefully sign up for the ridicule, antagonism, condescension, disrespect and potential violence against them based solely on their preference for the contents of their sexual partners' pants? Given how hard it still is, in many places, to be homosexual, it makes absolutely no sense to claim that the people who are, intentionally chose to be that way.
  • n2thenight24
    n2thenight24 Posts: 1,651 Member
    This is exactly the reason why I can't wait till my children's generation run the world. Hopefully, by the time my children are grown, this kind of ridiculousness will me moot and if you are homophobic (i.e. trying to 'fix' gays) you will have to hide it in shame.
  • CalJur
    CalJur Posts: 627 Member
    Reparative "therapy" is bull-ploppers. I would like to ask Dr. Oz when he chose to be straight. The man's a quack.

    Agree is Dr. Oz is nothing more than a t.v. quack. Merely referenced him because the topic appeared on his show.
  • CalJur
    CalJur Posts: 627 Member
    So I recently happened to catch this controversial topic on an episode of Dr. Oz.

    I am very tolerant and completely accepting of an individual's sexual orientation. For years I have believed that one is born gay just the same as one who is born straight. The Dr. Oz show, however, presented the premise that one is not born gay but rather is influenced by different societal factors and life experiences which can be undone through so-called reparative therapy. The practice has been banned in California for minors and remains extremely controversial.

    It has apparently worked changing some men from gay to straight (including marrying women and starting a family) while others have experienced depression and suicidal thoughts as a result of the therapy. This has caused me to possibly re-think my own beliefs about the root cause of being gay. I think I still believe it is something one is born with similar to being born with black or white skin. It just is.

    At the end of the day, however, I'll continue to respect differences and treat gay individuals with the same respect I treat straight individuals. I'm simply fascinated by the topic as it completely goes against everything I have believed my entire life about an individual being born gay.

    The goal is not to bash gays so if that is your response I trust the moderator will appropriately deal with you. I'm genuinely interested in this issue given that I live and work in the San Francisco Bay Area and have family members who are gay and would possibly consider such therapy for many reasons.
    Not to be rude, but this is a fitness website. Please keep this to the groups, I'm sure there are plenty of Dr. Oz-based groups on here.

    Actually considered this before posting. This topic, however, does affect the mental and physical fitness of many individuals. Moreover, no one is forced to come to this forum nor respond my friend. There are numerous topics which don't have that obvious fitness zeal to them but affect the overall mental and physical fitness for the people affected by them.
  • Dave198lbs
    Dave198lbs Posts: 8,810 Member
    if you are gay...good.

    if you are straight...good.

    But why on god's green earth do some gays (sorry but it seems gays do it more than straights) have to constantly announce their sexual orientation.

    can you imagine if straight people suddenly started announcing they are straight as often as gays have to announce their choice?

    and the flamboyant gays. They seem to be flaunting for the sole purpose of flaunting. it's tiring. stop it.
  • supahstar71
    supahstar71 Posts: 926 Member
    HETEROSEXUAL QUESTIONNAIRE by Martin Rochlin, Ph.D.


    Got this from a Safe Space training (a program that promotes awareness of & respect for the LGBT community). It reverses the questions that straight people often ask homosexuals. #17 is especially relevant for this thread. Gives great insight...

    Please try to answer the questions as candidly as possible.
    1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?
    2. When and how did you first decide you were a heterosexual?
    3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may grow out of?
    4. Could it be that your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same sex?
    5. If you’ve never slept with a person of the same sex, how can you be sure you wouldn’t prefer that?
    6. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexual tendencies? How did they react?
    7. Why do heterosexuals feel compelled to seduce others into their lifestyle?
    8. Why do you insist on flaunting your heterosexuality? Can’t you just be what you are and keep it quiet?
    9. A disproportionate majority of child molesters are heterosexual men. Do you consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual male teachers, pediatricians, priests, or scoutmasters?
    10. With all the societal support for marriage, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?
    11. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?
    12. Could you trust a heterosexual therapist to be objective? Don’t you fear s/he might be inclined to influence you in the direction of her/his own leanings?
    13. With the sexually segregated living conditions of military life, isn’t heterosexuality incompatible with military service?
    14. How can you enjoy an emotionally fulfilling experience with a person of the other sex when there are such vast differences between you? How can a man know what pleases a woman sexually or vice-versa?
    15. Shouldn’t you ask your far-out straight cohorts, like skinheads and born-agains, to keep quiet? Wouldn’t that improve your image?
    16. Why are heterosexuals so promiscuous?
    17. There seem to be very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques have been developed that might enable you to change if you really want to. After all, you never deliberately chose to be a heterosexual, did you? Have you considered aversion therapy or Heterosexuals Anonymous?
  • magj0y
    magj0y Posts: 1,911 Member
    So I recently happened to catch this controversial topic on an episode of Dr. Oz.

    I am very tolerant and completely accepting of an individual's sexual orientation. For years I have believed that one is born gay just the same as one who is born straight. The Dr. Oz show, however, presented the premise that one is not born gay but rather is influenced by different societal factors and life experiences which can be undone through so-called reparative therapy. The practice has been banned in California for minors and remains extremely controversial.

    It has apparently worked changing some men from gay to straight (including marrying women and starting a family) while others have experienced depression and suicidal thoughts as a result of the therapy. This has caused me to possibly re-think my own beliefs about the root cause of being gay. I think I still believe it is something one is born with similar to being born with black or white skin. It just is.

    At the end of the day, however, I'll continue to respect differences and treat gay individuals with the same respect I treat straight individuals. I'm simply fascinated by the topic as it completely goes against everything I have believed my entire life about an individual being born gay.

    The goal is not to bash gays so if that is your response I trust the moderator will appropriately deal with you. I'm genuinely interested in this issue given that I live and work in the San Francisco Bay Area and have family members who are gay and would possibly consider such therapy for many reasons.
    Not to be rude, but this is a fitness website. Please keep this to the groups, I'm sure there are plenty of Dr. Oz-based groups on here.

    Actually considered this before posting. This topic, however, does affect the mental and physical fitness of many individuals. Moreover, no one is forced to come to this forum nor respond my friend. There are numerous topics which don't have that obvious fitness zeal to them but affect the overall mental and physical fitness for the people affected by them.
    Oh just ignore him :drinker: Perfect place for this.
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    HETEROSEXUAL QUESTIONNAIRE by Martin Rochlin, Ph.D.


    Got this from a Safe Space training (a program that promotes awareness of & respect for the LGBT community). It reverses the questions that straight people often ask homosexuals. #17 is especially relevant for this thread. Gives great insight...

    Please try to answer the questions as candidly as possible.
    1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?
    2. When and how did you first decide you were a heterosexual?
    3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may grow out of?
    4. Could it be that your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same sex?
    5. If you’ve never slept with a person of the same sex, how can you be sure you wouldn’t prefer that?
    6. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexual tendencies? How did they react?
    7. Why do heterosexuals feel compelled to seduce others into their lifestyle?
    8. Why do you insist on flaunting your heterosexuality? Can’t you just be what you are and keep it quiet?
    9. A disproportionate majority of child molesters are heterosexual men. Do you consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual male teachers, pediatricians, priests, or scoutmasters?
    10. With all the societal support for marriage, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?
    11. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?
    12. Could you trust a heterosexual therapist to be objective? Don’t you fear s/he might be inclined to influence you in the direction of her/his own leanings?
    13. With the sexually segregated living conditions of military life, isn’t heterosexuality incompatible with military service?
    14. How can you enjoy an emotionally fulfilling experience with a person of the other sex when there are such vast differences between you? How can a man know what pleases a woman sexually or vice-versa?
    15. Shouldn’t you ask your far-out straight cohorts, like skinheads and born-agains, to keep quiet? Wouldn’t that improve your image?
    16. Why are heterosexuals so promiscuous?
    17. There seem to be very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques have been developed that might enable you to change if you really want to. After all, you never deliberately chose to be a heterosexual, did you? Have you considered aversion therapy or Heterosexuals Anonymous?
    DUDE! I love this. this is awesome. Really really awesome.
  • Being gay is not a choice, just like you don't get to choose other things. You don't get to choose your natural hair, or eye color. You don't get to choose what foods you like and don't like. I don't see why it matters. You love who you love, and you're attracted to who you're attracted too. I believe you're born that way, and you discover it about yourself as time progresses..just like everything else. I didn't come out of my mother and scream "I like vagina". People who were raped etc and run to the opposite sex of which it happened aren't gay..they're just afraid of that gender. You're not sexually attracted to them. That's choosing, and that's giving actual gay people a bad name..shame the world is so close-minded.

    I'm a normal girl, living a normal life. I go to school. I'm getting my degree in Criminal Justice, and I happen to like girls. What's the big deal? I'm just like all of you except I love my girlfriend, while you love your boyfriend. Do I get a lot of crap for it? Yeah, I do, but it's who I am and I'm happy. If I could CHOOSE this do you think I would? No. Why would I want to be something the world is so against, and cause problems for myself? Think about it.
  • Umeboshi
    Umeboshi Posts: 1,637 Member
    if you are gay...good.

    if you are straight...good.

    But why on god's green earth do some gays (sorry but it seems gays do it more than straights) have to constantly announce their sexual orientation.

    can you imagine if straight people suddenly started announcing they are straight as often as gays have to announce their choice?

    and the flamboyant gays. They seem to be flaunting for the sole purpose of flaunting. it's tiring. stop it.

    Oh please. Your privilege is showing.

    Straight people are CONSTANTLY flaunting their sexual orientation.
    Straight people are ALL about saying "Oh I'm picking out a present for my bf/gf" "Oh my bf/gf said THIS the other day"
    Straight guys? ALL about announcing that they did XYZ with their girlfriend.
    Straight people are always openly checking out people of the opposite sex and announcing it to their friends.
    Straight people have TONS of movies all about their straight relationships.
    Straight people on MFP are ALWAYS announcing their straightness with threads like "GIRLS WHAT DO YOU FIND HOT IN A GUY" etc.

    Straight people act SO straight, they don't act at all how us 'flamboyant gays' do. They seem to be flaunting for the sole purpose of flaunting. It's tiring. Stop it.
  • ladymiseryali
    ladymiseryali Posts: 2,555 Member
    if you are gay...good.

    if you are straight...good.

    But why on god's green earth do some gays (sorry but it seems gays do it more than straights) have to constantly announce their sexual orientation.

    can you imagine if straight people suddenly started announcing they are straight as often as gays have to announce their choice?

    and the flamboyant gays. They seem to be flaunting for the sole purpose of flaunting. it's tiring. stop it.

    Oh please. Your privilege is showing.

    Straight people are CONSTANTLY flaunting their sexual orientation.
    Straight people are ALL about saying "Oh I'm picking out a present for my bf/gf" "Oh my bf/gf said THIS the other day"
    Straight guys? ALL about announcing that they did XYZ with their girlfriend.
    Straight people are always openly checking out people of the opposite sex and announcing it to their friends.
    Straight people have TONS of movies all about their straight relationships.
    Straight people on MFP are ALWAYS announcing their straightness with threads like "GIRLS WHAT DO YOU FIND HOT IN A GUY" etc.

    Straight people act SO straight, they don't act at all how us 'flamboyant gays' do. They seem to be flaunting for the sole purpose of flaunting. It's tiring. Stop it.

    Very good point. And it's seen as 'normal', but if a gay person goes "check out the bum on that bloke" or "I did *insert sexytime thing here* with this chick", people look at them like they have five heads or they get ridiculed for it. It's a two-way street. Either everyone is allowed to flaunt their sexuality, or no one is.
  • shellebelle87
    shellebelle87 Posts: 291 Member
    [/quote]
    [/quote]
    Not to be rude, but this is a fitness website. Please keep this to the groups, I'm sure there are plenty of Dr. Oz-based groups on here.
    [/quote]

    Chit chat, fun and games there bucko. Doesnt need to be fitness related in this section, in case you couldnt tell from all the "rate me" threads.
  • GinaBeana1121
    GinaBeana1121 Posts: 49 Member
    I used to believe it was a choice but now believe that there are factors that lead to it.. while im against the lifestyle I am tolerant and accepting of those who live that way.. the biggest problem I have with these therapies is that it can lead to a lot of pressure for people to change and they may act differently but not really be changed

    Yup. Those straight people and their weird lifestyle choice. I really can't understand how they live that way either. I'm tolerant of them because some of my best friends are straight, and they seem like nice enough folks. Still. I pity them because they were obviously influenced by the straight culture that surrounds them.

    Hahaha yessss this.
  • Umeboshi
    Umeboshi Posts: 1,637 Member
    if you are gay...good.

    if you are straight...good.

    But why on god's green earth do some gays (sorry but it seems gays do it more than straights) have to constantly announce their sexual orientation.

    can you imagine if straight people suddenly started announcing they are straight as often as gays have to announce their choice?

    and the flamboyant gays. They seem to be flaunting for the sole purpose of flaunting. it's tiring. stop it.

    Oh please. Your privilege is showing.

    Straight people are CONSTANTLY flaunting their sexual orientation.
    Straight people are ALL about saying "Oh I'm picking out a present for my bf/gf" "Oh my bf/gf said THIS the other day"
    Straight guys? ALL about announcing that they did XYZ with their girlfriend.
    Straight people are always openly checking out people of the opposite sex and announcing it to their friends.
    Straight people have TONS of movies all about their straight relationships.
    Straight people on MFP are ALWAYS announcing their straightness with threads like "GIRLS WHAT DO YOU FIND HOT IN A GUY" etc.

    Straight people act SO straight, they don't act at all how us 'flamboyant gays' do. They seem to be flaunting for the sole purpose of flaunting. It's tiring. Stop it.

    Very good point. And it's seen as 'normal', but if a gay person goes "check out the bum on that bloke" or "I did *insert sexytime thing here* with this chick", people look at them like they have five heads or they get ridiculed for it. It's a two-way street. Either everyone is allowed to flaunt their sexuality, or no one is.

    :flowerforyou: Not to mention people who complain about us "flaunting" are essentially trying to erase queer culture.
    Trans people are already forced into stealth half the time because of this awful attitude straight cis people have. -_-
    Edit to point out that I bring up trans people as another erased minority. Trans people are not necessarily gay.