Dumb warning labels

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  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
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    :angry: I am mad(if you can't tell)

    I bought shampoo today. I read the directions.

    Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

    NOWHERE did it say close my eyes.

    That stuff hurt:grumble:
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
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    Mine isn't a warning label so much as obvious instructions. I bought a CD case that holds 72 CDs. At the bottom it states "UNIT AUTOMATICALLY BECOMES PORTABLE WHEN CARRIED".
    . Ok some serious LMAO here :laugh:
  • reddi2roll
    reddi2roll Posts: 356 Member
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    Bump, plus:

    "Do not use for drying pets." -- In the manual for a microwave oven.

    You gotta know someone did this ;D
  • k011185
    k011185 Posts: 320 Member
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    Bump, plus:

    "Do not use for drying pets." -- In the manual for a microwave oven.


    Hahahahahah :laugh:

    Unfortunately, years ago when microwave ovens first started being sold, people did this with their pets. My uncle worked in the Sears Appliance Repair Dept. and had to clean out one where a lady had put her poodle in to dry it. Horrible.

    Did your Uncle play "Pull my finger" with you and take you Snipe hunting? Or did he have a friend who woke up in Vegas in a tub full of ice and a missing kidney?
    The first grooming shop I worked in had a client that killed 3 puppies by putting them in the clothes dryer. She figured that's what we used, since she had heard us use the term 'dryer' for dogs.
    Some people really are *that* dumb.
  • lorelei105
    lorelei105 Posts: 39 Member
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    The Clorox bleach wipes that say "not to be used as an infant wipe" *shudder*
  • Katbody10
    Katbody10 Posts: 369 Member
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    bumping to find again later .. some of these are hilarious! :drinker:
  • btracy01
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    Saw a superhero Halloween Costume that said "Will not allow you to fly" Drats.....
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
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    The Clorox bleach wipes that say "not to be used as an infant wipe" *shudder*

    When I went away for work training, I bought Clorox wipes, placing them strategically around the house in hopes someone would use them :tongue:

    My ex calls me one night "I hate those butt wipes you got. They really sting!" He says.

    I scream " Gooo wash it off. Did the kids use them? OMG THOSE ARE BLEACH,!":noway:

    He was kidding............I think:huh:
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
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    P5160178.jpg
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
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    warning-fails-3.jpg
  • mfp_1
    mfp_1 Posts: 516 Member
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    Posted 2012-11-22 13:44 ..."Do not use for drying pets." -- In the manual for a microwave oven.

    Posted 2012-11-22 16:47 ...cop & he got a call from a woman who had bathed her dog then tried to dry him.

    Posted 2012-11-27 11:48 ...lady had put her poodle in to dry it.

    Posted 2012-11-27 18:15: ... a client that killed 3 puppies by putting them in the clothes dryer.

    *************************************
    http://www.snopes.com/horrors/techno/microwavedpet.asp

    Variations:
    Small dogs (especially poodles) and cats are the usual victims of this clash with technology, but parakeets and turtles have also been sent to the great gig in the sky in some tellings of the legend.
    Almost invariably, the befuddled pet owner is an elderly woman. In the rare non-little old lady versions, the accidental micropooching is said to be the work of a child.

    How the animal got wet varies — it was either caught out in the rain, or just had its bath.

    Origins: The legend about the microwaved pet has been with us since 1976, but its antecedents were around long before that. If lore is to be believed, Phew! foolhardy old ladies have been attempting to dry wet pets in clothes dryers and conventional ovens long before the invention of the microwave oven.

    A 1942 tale in which a roasted cat is discovered in a wood-burning oven has been pointed to as a predecessor to this more modern tale about current domestic technology. In it, however, the cat gets into the oven under its own power; its mistress has no idea it is in there until she later discovered the crisped kitty.

    A related Russian legend tells of a mother whose custom was to bathe her child in a tub of warm water. She places the tub (with Junior in it) on top of the unlit wood stove, and goes to speak to a neighbor. The gossip session stretches out longer than anticipated. Upon return to her kitchen, she discovers a draft through the open back door has caused the fire to rekindle under the child and her baby now lies dead in the tub.

    These older variations on the same theme cast doubt on the widely-accepted theory that this legend is about fear of new technology. Other "cooked to death" legends include:
    Nuke of Earl: Worker who stands too close to microwave radiation is cooked by its rays.
    The Brown Betty: Bride trying to gain a fast tan prior to her wedding day cooks herself to death in commercial tanning beds.
    The Hippie Babysitter: Stoned babysitter cooks the baby she's tending, thinking it's a pot roast.

    Although there have been a few verifiable cases of pets subjected to microwaving, each of them were deliberate acts of cruelty, perpetrated by twisted souls who knew all too well what they were doing. Micropoochings arising from a lack of understanding of the technology, however, are still incidents of lore only.
    *************************************

    Caveat: A story can be simultaneously true and an urban legend.
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
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    warning-fails-3.jpg

    Keep the booze away from that doggie!:laugh:
  • nancycaregiver
    nancycaregiver Posts: 812 Member
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    duh.jpg

    I love this so much!

    My old mattress had a tag on it that said "Do not attempt to swallow mattress."

    They just forgot punctuation.

    Ok, all these are great but this comment had me in tears!!

    "Do not swallow, Sincerely The Mattress"
  • k011185
    k011185 Posts: 320 Member
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    Posted 2012-11-22 13:44 ..."Do not use for drying pets." -- In the manual for a microwave oven.

    Posted 2012-11-22 16:47 ...cop & he got a call from a woman who had bathed her dog then tried to dry him.

    Posted 2012-11-27 11:48 ...lady had put her poodle in to dry it.

    Posted 2012-11-27 18:15: ... a client that killed 3 puppies by putting them in the clothes dryer.

    *************************************
    http://www.snopes.com/horrors/techno/microwavedpet.asp

    Variations:
    Small dogs (especially poodles) and cats are the usual victims of this clash with technology, but parakeets and turtles have also been sent to the great gig in the sky in some tellings of the legend.
    Almost invariably, the befuddled pet owner is an elderly woman. In the rare non-little old lady versions, the accidental micropooching is said to be the work of a child.

    How the animal got wet varies — it was either caught out in the rain, or just had its bath.

    Origins: The legend about the microwaved pet has been with us since 1976, but its antecedents were around long before that. If lore is to be believed, Phew! foolhardy old ladies have been attempting to dry wet pets in clothes dryers and conventional ovens long before the invention of the microwave oven.

    A 1942 tale in which a roasted cat is discovered in a wood-burning oven has been pointed to as a predecessor to this more modern tale about current domestic technology. In it, however, the cat gets into the oven under its own power; its mistress has no idea it is in there until she later discovered the crisped kitty.

    A related Russian legend tells of a mother whose custom was to bathe her child in a tub of warm water. She places the tub (with Junior in it) on top of the unlit wood stove, and goes to speak to a neighbor. The gossip session stretches out longer than anticipated. Upon return to her kitchen, she discovers a draft through the open back door has caused the fire to rekindle under the child and her baby now lies dead in the tub.

    These older variations on the same theme cast doubt on the widely-accepted theory that this legend is about fear of new technology. Other "cooked to death" legends include:
    Nuke of Earl: Worker who stands too close to microwave radiation is cooked by its rays.
    The Brown Betty: Bride trying to gain a fast tan prior to her wedding day cooks herself to death in commercial tanning beds.
    The Hippie Babysitter: Stoned babysitter cooks the baby she's tending, thinking it's a pot roast.

    Although there have been a few verifiable cases of pets subjected to microwaving, each of them were deliberate acts of cruelty, perpetrated by twisted souls who knew all too well what they were doing. Micropoochings arising from a lack of understanding of the technology, however, are still incidents of lore only.
    *************************************

    Caveat: A story can be simultaneously true and an urban legend.
    It never occurred to me the story might not be true... lol. My boss fully believed it, and I just accepted it when she passed it on to the rest of the shop.
    There was a lot in the news around the time about a groomer using a heated kennel dryer that killed two collies, until now I never thought that the client may have just been seeking attention or wanting to see if she could trick some gullible groomers!
  • KeriW626
    KeriW626 Posts: 430
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    On my iron: "Do not iron clothes while being worn."

    How lazy does one have to be to not take off the shirt?
    I have ironed the bottom of a shirt while wearing it :)

    I have a friend who burned herself twice ironing her pants while she is wearing them. I also had a daughter in law who used an iron and ironing board to straighten her hair.... people.
  • CudyBug
    CudyBug Posts: 742 Member
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    \

    I have a friend who burned herself twice ironing her pants while she is wearing them. I also had a daughter in law who used an iron and ironing board to straighten her hair.... people.

    I used to take a clothes iron and straighten my sister's very curly thick hair when we were younger.She would lay on our hardwood floor with towel under her hair. This was before flat irons were easy and cheap and we were super poor :D
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
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    :flowerforyou:
  • Blessed9jaBeauty
    Blessed9jaBeauty Posts: 504 Member
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    stupid_warning_labels_10.jpg
  • Arbeidslyst
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    My peanut butter might contain nuts.
  • Arbeidslyst
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    May contain nuts on my Peanut butter jar. REALLY. No *kitten* Sherlock!!

    And what's up with the *may*? Is there a chance there is no nuts in it and if so what does this jar contain?