Should I keep dating this guy? (Cheap)

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  • YaGigi
    YaGigi Posts: 817 Member
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    You need to wake up and realize that this "feminism" you're talking about is not pro women. In other countries where women did not archive this feminism yet, thank God, if a woman wants to take care of a baby, she is legally protected for staying t home on maternity leave for 1.5 to 3 years, her job is protected and she receives a percentage of her salary. That's what I call taking care of women's rights, not pushing women going back to work after 6 weeks.

    No idea what you were fighting for out there. Equal treatment? What equal treatment? In some states you're not allowed to have abortion! That's not 40, that's like 60 years past in Europe.

    Who needs equal treatment if its ridiculous and only causes pain in *kitten*?
    I think... you are... very confused. This debate is not about America vs. Europe, it is about how rude, presumptuous, and mean it is for a woman to expect a man to pay for her and then turn around and shame him when he doesn't. I don't know why you're making this about America, considering nothing I've said has in any way insinuated that I support the way women's rights are handled in this country. But way to go with the total avoidance of the subject at hand.

    The point is this - in this day and age where a woman's right to work is, as it should be, protected by her civil rights, there is no legitimate reason for her to expect a man to pay for everything she needs on a date. That practice came about BECAUSE women had no, or little, money in their own names because IT WAS ILLEGAL. Now that we've achieved equal status, it is COMPLETELY absurd to expect men to empty out their pockets just to court us.

    Like I said earlier in this topic, if your preferences dictate that a guy should spoil you and you should never have to pay a cent for anything, fine. I hope you find a guy who is willing to abide that kind of brattiness. But that's not the norm anymore because it is an outdated and unfair practice. If you want that done for you, it's YOUR responsibility to let the guy know. It's NOT your right to expect it of him, and it certainly isn't your right to shame and disgrace him when he doesn't cater to your princess-level desires without even being warned of what they are.

    Lol, you think I'm confused? Oh dear :D you demand equal rights yet you have no idea why you need them. :D

    And quit saying what I have to do. I have never met a man who didn't want to pay for my dinner. :) I guess I do not look like a woman who fights to be equal with men. And they love it :)
  • 3dogsrunning
    3dogsrunning Posts: 27,167 Member
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    Here is what i have found...

    women who dont have much going on career wise are the ones who expect men to pay for everything.

    the women who ive dated who are career minded/professionals will begin to pay their share as the relationship develops and some pay their share right from the start.

    a woman who has a good career and doesnt expect to be taken care of is super sexy.

    Disagree.

    I graduated Ivy League and now I'm an executive at an international company. And I expect my man to pay.

    I'll cook for him at home but I won't pay at a restaurant. Only maybe once a year for his bday.

    nothing is 100% but most women who have good careers dont expect men to pay for everything. and not every "executive" is making bank. so for those of you that need a man to show you the finer things i guess i understand a little.

    I should've add that most of my girlfriends are pretty successful and follow the same way.

    When women are successful and have something in life, they won't date a broke guy from a street, no, we want a man equal to us in terms of education, money and career. And I have not yet met a successful man who would ask a lady to pay at a restaurant. That's low class.

    Please don't speak for all "successful" women.

    ETA - you are certainly entitled to your opinion but that doesn't make it what all successful women want.
  • auticus
    auticus Posts: 1,051 Member
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    We take care of each other. She pays once in a while, I pay once in a while. Otherwise its a parasitic relationship.

    Your mileage may vary.
  • Beewallows
    Beewallows Posts: 110 Member
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    I can't believe people think the guy should pay for everything. Maybe 20 years ago. Such an outdated notion. I guess we women folk should just stay home and clean, because we don't have any money of our own.
  • MiCool90
    MiCool90 Posts: 460 Member
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    He is 29 and we seem to get along great.

    Date 1: We had 2 drinks he payed.

    Date 2: Watched movie (he payed), DIDN'T ask me if I wanted popcorn. After movie went to restaurant, I had like a 7 dollar plate, bill came and it was split. I asked if he wanted me to pay he said yes since he paid for movie.

    Since this is date 2, is it too soon for him to start wanting me to pay or am I over reacting?

    Haha... Did you have fun and enjoy his company?

    Ask yourself.... do you want a man to pay for you? or do you want a man to be a companion with?

    There are plenty of men out there that would pay for you... but that doesn't make it meaningful and fulfilling.
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
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    I like to pay for myself. I have my own money and everything.
  • YaGigi
    YaGigi Posts: 817 Member
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    ^ why you mad?

    i also LOVE when women taut feminism as being this life changing event yet they totally ignore the demographics of who's actually taking care of their kids, cooking their meals, cleaning their homes etc.

    Thank you!

    I'll accept equal rights when women become as strong physically as men. And of course, I accept equal rights, when men start having menstruation, carrying babies for 9 months, delivering a baby with paid and blood, and breast feed them. And all that with looking pretty for him, cooking and cleaning, AND having career.
  • trophywife24
    trophywife24 Posts: 1,472 Member
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    ^ why you mad?

    i also LOVE when women taut feminism as being this life changing event yet they totally ignore the demographics of who's actually taking care of their kids, cooking their meals, cleaning their homes etc.

    I just nodded and clinked my ice-filled cup in your general direction. Here, here.

    There isn't a feminist bone in my itty bitty little taken care of body. I still manage to function. And am....... like........ happy.
  • themeaningofthemorning
    themeaningofthemorning Posts: 320 Member
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    Lol, you think I'm confused? Oh dear :D you demand equal rights yet you have no idea why you need them. :D

    And quit saying what I have to do. I have never met a man who didn't want to pay for my dinner. :) I guess I do not look like a woman who fights to be equal with men. And they love it :)
    Really? Okay, please explain to me the purpose of my equal rights and treatment and then please explain to me why it is okay for me to place expectations on men simply because they are men when I do not want any expectations placed on me simply because I am a woman.

    Oh, honey. Don't flatter yourself. All of us have had men wanting to pay for our dinners. But there is a difference between a man wanting to pay for your dinner and a woman expecting a man to pay for her dinner and then throwing a hissy fit when he doesn't.
  • RobKarmic
    RobKarmic Posts: 108 Member
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    Wow aren't you a rude one? if anything he should stop dating you!
  • chivalryder
    chivalryder Posts: 4,391 Member
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    steal-51-emma-watson-*****-please.jpg
  • YaGigi
    YaGigi Posts: 817 Member
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    I should've add that most of my girlfriends are pretty successful and follow the same way.

    When women are successful and have something in life, they won't date a broke guy from a street, no, we want a man equal to us in terms of education, money and career. And I have not yet met a successful man who would ask a lady to pay at a restaurant. That's low class.


    lol.. expecting a man to pay for every date you go on is low class.


    maybe your definition of "successful" is below mine because every single woman i have ever met that was truly successful did not expect or want a man to pay for every date they had.

    If you never been on the moon, it doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Probably, you should start looking for real women, not a lame copy of it. Not sure if you can handle it thou.
  • Beewallows
    Beewallows Posts: 110 Member
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    Why can't we be gentlewomen?? How sad to let boys have all the fun :P
  • Laces_0ut
    Laces_0ut Posts: 3,750 Member
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    I should've add that most of my girlfriends are pretty successful and follow the same way.

    When women are successful and have something in life, they won't date a broke guy from a street, no, we want a man equal to us in terms of education, money and career. And I have not yet met a successful man who would ask a lady to pay at a restaurant. That's low class.


    lol.. expecting a man to pay for every date you go on is low class.


    maybe your definition of "successful" is below mine because every single woman i have ever met that was truly successful did not expect or want a man to pay for every date they had.

    If you never been on the moon, it doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Probably, you should start looking for real women, not a lame copy of it. Not sure if you can handle it thou.

    i never said i didnt believe gold diggers exist.
  • DevanEve
    DevanEve Posts: 130
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    no. a gentleman should always offer to pay.

    so should a woman.

    ^ This
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
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    When women are successful and have something in life, they won't date a broke guy from a street, no, we want a man equal to us in terms of education, money and career. And I have not yet met a successful man who would ask a lady to pay at a restaurant. That's low class.
    [/quote]

    If you want a man equal to you then wouldn't it logically make sense to split the bill?
    [/quote]

    Not to toot my own horn, but I consider myself fairly successful financially. And you're right, I do always pay for the date. Since I know I am paying, I usually suggest where I am taking her and this way I know my budget.

    However, the general tone in these types of threads is that a man should ALWAYS pay. Well... no. He doesn't OWE you anything. True many men are old school and would pay, even if you demand to go to some ridiculous place thats out of his budget, we still go above and beyond (I mean... not all of us can afford extra nice $20 drink places...)

    Then the ladies say "well, because he asked her out, he should pay". Once again, no. If he's paying for the pleasure of your company, thats called an escort service. Also, kudos for having the ego to think that men deserve to pay for just being in your presence.

    Ladies: If a man asks you out, most stand up men (like me) would gladly offer to pay. But please be kind and don't make us think we're out with a girl from escort service and atleast suggest to pay to split the bill. Unless he took you, without asking, to some very expensive place, in which case you should mention ahead of time, politely, that you don't think you brought enough for a place like this. TRUST me, it will make us respect you more
  • _Bob_
    _Bob_ Posts: 1,487 Member
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    I think whoever initiated the date should pay. If it was a mutual decision, split the bill. That just seems fair (and like good manners) to me.

    I agree.

    So let me get this straight, I am paying for the honor of spending time with you?

    I will make sure to ask in future if the girl I'm asking out is from an escort service...

    tumblr_lxk5cmZITk1ql5yr7o1_r1_400.gif
  • trophywife24
    trophywife24 Posts: 1,472 Member
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    I wouldn't expect to pay for a date but I also would never, ever suggest going somewhere expensive, either. I actually wouldn't suggest anywhere unless I was asked to.
  • themeaningofthemorning
    themeaningofthemorning Posts: 320 Member
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    Not to toot my own horn, but I consider myself fairly successful financially. And you're right, I do always pay for the date. Since I know I am paying, I usually suggest where I am taking her and this way I know my budget.

    However, the general tone in these types of threads is that a man should ALWAYS pay. Well... no. He doesn't OWE you anything. True many men are old school and would pay, even if you demand to go to some ridiculous place thats out of his budget, we still go above and beyond (I mean... not all of us can afford extra nice $20 drink places...)

    Then the ladies say "well, because he asked her out, he should pay". Once again, no. If he's paying for the pleasure of your company, thats called an escort service. Also, kudos for having the ego to think that men deserve to pay for just being in your presence.

    Ladies: If a man asks you out, most stand up men (like me) would gladly offer to pay. But please be kind and don't make us think we're out with a girl from escort service and atleast suggest to pay to split the bill. Unless he took you, without asking, to some very expensive place, in which case you should mention ahead of time, politely, that you don't think you brought enough for a place like this. TRUST me, it will make us respect you more
    oh my god THANK YOU
  • justkeepswimng
    justkeepswimng Posts: 506
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    its still early but i know personally, i dont pay when im not all that interested

    This is so true. I recently went on a date with this guy and he paid for everything. The second date, he paid for the dinner. Then we went to a movie (one that I didn't even want to see) and he asked me to pay for my half. I was happy to oblige. After all, he had already spent a lot on me that weekend. After the movie, we went our separate ways and I never heard from him again. I realized that the reason he asked me to pay for the movie was that sometime between dinner and the movie, he decided he was no longer interested. In hindsight, I should have made him pay or admit that he wasn't into me (in which case I would have gone home and not sat through that god awful movie).
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