Do you feel like the weight will cure your "ugliness" ?

Here's my take on it. I was fit in high school and gained all of my weight afterward. I was a confident, happy kid, and it took me 14 years to turn into the sad, standoffish, shy, fat girl I had become - which, btw, went COMPLETELY against my personality.

I never considered myself to be a 'fat' or 'skinny' version of me. I just considered me, ME! So, now that I've lost weight, I still internally feel the same as I had grown accustomed to feeling with all the weight. I spent 14 years feeling that way, so I figure it'll take just as long, likely, to stop feeling like that shy, standoffish fat girl.

Losing weight is not a cure all. It is a great step in the right direction to a healthy and happy life, but it will not magically change you from one person to another. I think that part, the getting to know yourself again and see yourself the way others see you, is harder than losing the weight in the first place.

Well first of all, I am not ugly. Weightloss isn't going to change my features.

That being said, I have flaws which I obsess about. I will never be perfect and it pisses me off. Nnothing is ever goig to change that. But I do know that despite the low self esteem, fundamentally I'm not ugly and it's unlikely I will become so.

Well, OP, that is not at all how I view you. I can safely say that each and every 'before and after' post I see, I am struck by how gorgeous everyone is. Wanna know why? Because health, and pride in taking care of one's self and body, is BEAUTIFUL. I mean GORGEOUS. Seriously. So what if you don't have a perfect VS model's nose, or you have tiger stripes, or your waist isn't what you dreamed it would be. But you are healthy, and vibrant, and you gave a *kitten* enough to take care of yourself and go on this journey.

It is normal for a person after a huge weight loss to still see a larger person in the mirror. That does fade with time, so the helpful part is to maintain the weightloss and know that your mind will gradually adjust to the "new you". It is a studied phenomena, actually. You're normal! You're ok! And I think you're beautiful, truly!

Look at what qualities you love. Do you love your hair? Maybe your eyes? Focus on those things; buy new eyeliner, or some yummy hair products, and focus on those things.

xoxo

I think I'm pretty. I just need to lose weight so I can get my confidence back. I think confidence is half of beauty, honestly.

I have always thought I am not the shiniest apple in the basket. I guess that is just how it is, because it never seems to change. I haven't lost to much weight that is noticeable yet, but I think I will always feel the same way. I will just feel more confident in my health, but not necessarily my looks.

At my age, I am not concerned about being "ugly" per se....I am just concerned about the effects aging will have on what is left of my body after I finish losing weight. The fat was keeping my skin firm....now its puckered and I am not happy with the result. But its still better than being fat. And I figure I will never look like I am 20 again anyway. Just want to be healthy and look good in clothes.

I think you should try changing your surroundings and do something you were not able to do when you were heavier. For example, run a 5K, go rock climbing, etc. As far as feeling ugly you have to do things that make you feel attractive ,ie dressing up, pamper day, etc.

For the record, OP, you are not ugly. But remember that beauty isn't only on the outside - it comes from within. I know that's cliche but it is TRUE.

It makes me so sad that so many of you are feeling down on yourselves :frown:

Me? I KNOW I'm a sexy beast.....I do acknowledge that I have some extra, but I'm still gorgeous! :glasses:

haha Right on!

I KNOW exactly what you mean! I've lost 108 lbs and still all I see is the fat I still have to lose.

The mental fat takes longer to lose than the physical fat.

I know exactly how you feel. I keep telling myself that i'll feel better about myself... to date i've lost 55 lbs and when I look in the mirror 70% of the time I feel like I see the SAME 200 lb girl. Its so discouraging and disheartening. I'm still trying to lose 20 more lbs... hoping that it will help me JUST feel better about myself.

the 2 are not related to me....

I don't think I'm ugly per se, however I find it hard to think I look good. It's not just about looks for me though. I'm generally not satisfied with myself. Seems like everything I do and am everyone else in my family can do better.

The highlight was when my uncle called me ugly to my face. He told me that if he wasn't my uncle and saw me on the street, he wouldn't look twice and that I was unnatural since I don't wear make up.

It makes me sad that only a couple posters on here said that you have to love yourself first.

We are all beautiful people. You have to find what makes you beautiful and focus on that. Yes, there are going to be times when you think you look pretty crappy. But, I can guarantee that that will happen no matter what size you are.

You are the only you that will ever exist. Embrace and love yourself first, accept your body for what it is and be thankful it works.

Then you can move forward and make improvements!

Be strong everyone! We are all fantastic!

What she said!! lol!! Come on folks, why should we hate ourselve!!! What i think and what you think is beautiful will proberbly be different, which is nice!!!

I weigh 197 pounds now but used to weigh 210 pounds, I used to get alot of attention then being bigger. I know it's because of my personality because, I like to chat and have a laugh. Yer some guys did say, I do like you but I prefer thinner girls. but what I'm trying to say is big, medium small, we all should love ourselves.

PROMTOTE HEALTHY HAPPY ATTITUDES!!! We should have self esteem taught in schools. xx