Do you feel like the weight will cure your "ugliness" ?

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  • kittybabexo
    kittybabexo Posts: 34
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    Yes, everytime i look in the mirror i think "when i lose weight i'll look better" :(
  • Bakkasan
    Bakkasan Posts: 1,027 Member
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    The mental fat takes longer to lose than the physical fat.
  • pixtotts
    pixtotts Posts: 552 Member
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    i worry sometimes about how i will look having lost weight...

    but i think its sad that people might be trying to loose weight to "cure ugliness" :(
  • aladams83
    aladams83 Posts: 47
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    I know exactly how you feel. I keep telling myself that i'll feel better about myself... to date i've lost 55 lbs and when I look in the mirror 70% of the time I feel like I see the SAME 200 lb girl. Its so discouraging and disheartening. I'm still trying to lose 20 more lbs... hoping that it will help me JUST feel better about myself.
  • ObtainingBalance
    ObtainingBalance Posts: 1,446 Member
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    Yes.... my weight loss in the past had been motivated by that. I told myself I was ugly and that when I lost weight I would be pretty.

    --- lost the weight later, still wasn't happy with myself.

    And then I started realizing beauty is more than skin deep. People are attracted to your personality. There might be some shallow people out there who have called you fat, but you're not worth their time.

    You're more than the number of calories you ate today, or your jean size.
    Learn to accept yourself, because you can't love something you hate.

    And you are very beautiful . Start telling yourself it 'til you believe it.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/IceyRain/view/how-to-care-for-yourself-during-a-bad-body-image-day-448223
  • twinmama1987
    twinmama1987 Posts: 566 Member
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    the 2 are not related to me....
  • pkw58
    pkw58 Posts: 2,038 Member
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    This is really going to sound weird, but until I started doing yoga I really didn't like my exterior, fat or thin. Now with the weight off, I like that it is easier to do yoga and barre3 and walk. not to mention wearing clothes 5 sizes smaller!

    I think Bakkasan said it best above --- "The mental fat takes longer to lose than the physical fat"..

    I adjusted to the physical fat by moving to another closet and/or giving away all my "bigger clothes". I am only buying clothes that 1) fit and 2) make me feel beautiful. I am also doing Project 333 so I don't get carried away with this.

    Celebrate the beautiful individual you as well as the people around you. And say that back to me if I have a bad moment - we all have them.
  • Galathea96
    Galathea96 Posts: 200 Member
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    I don't think I'm ugly per se, however I find it hard to think I look good. It's not just about looks for me though. I'm generally not satisfied with myself. Seems like everything I do and am everyone else in my family can do better.

    The highlight was when my uncle called me ugly to my face. He told me that if he wasn't my uncle and saw me on the street, he wouldn't look twice and that I was unnatural since I don't wear make up.
  • taelardinois
    taelardinois Posts: 30 Member
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    For the record, OP, you are not ugly. But remember that beauty isn't only on the outside - it comes from within. I know that's cliche but it is TRUE.

    This is true. Try to find some things that you really like about yourself, like if you have great hair, pretty eyes, or you know how to put together a great outfit. Focus on that and build your confidence up. And don't beat yourself up so much. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Everyone's concept is different but the one thing that people always find attractive is confidence and kindness.
  • victorialkay
    victorialkay Posts: 70
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    It makes me sad that only a couple posters on here said that you have to love yourself first.

    We are all beautiful people. You have to find what makes you beautiful and focus on that. Yes, there are going to be times when you think you look pretty crappy. But, I can guarantee that that will happen no matter what size you are.

    You are the only you that will ever exist. Embrace and love yourself first, accept your body for what it is and be thankful it works.

    Then you can move forward and make improvements!

    Be strong everyone! We are all fantastic! :)

    What she said!! lol!! Come on folks, why should we hate ourselve!!! What i think and what you think is beautiful will proberbly be different, which is nice!!!

    I weigh 197 pounds now but used to weigh 210 pounds, I used to get alot of attention then being bigger. I know it's because of my personality because, I like to chat and have a laugh. Yer some guys did say, I do like you but I prefer thinner girls. but what I'm trying to say is big, medium small, we all should love ourselves.

    PROMTOTE HEALTHY HAPPY ATTITUDES!!! We should have self esteem taught in schools. xx:heart:
  • mtabh
    mtabh Posts: 128 Member
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    I don't think I'm ugly per se, however I find it hard to think I look good. It's not just about looks for me though. I'm generally not satisfied with myself. Seems like everything I do and am everyone else in my family can do better.

    The highlight was when my uncle called me ugly to my face. He told me that if he wasn't my uncle and saw me on the street, he wouldn't look twice and that I was unnatural since I don't wear make up.

    This is heartbreaking. Your value isn't measured by what you can accomplish, do, how you look, etc. Your value and beauty is about who you are as a person. Cherish yourself, even when others don't. And definitely don't look to anyone like your Uncle for your worth. You are so much more than that. <3
  • RhonndaJ
    RhonndaJ Posts: 1,615 Member
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    No.

    If you have low self esteem, losing weight isn't going to fix it, that's why taking your time on this journey I think is really necessary because it's not just the outside we need to be working on.

    Fixing the outside, that's kind of the easy part, fixing the inside is a lot harder.

    That said, I've never considered myself ugly. I'm just... me.

    Which doesn't mean that I don't think parts of my body, heck, most of my body, is unattractive, but that's separate. That's just my fat suit.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    losing weight wont cure ugliness. Know what will cure ugliness? Taking the time along the way, while you are losing weight, to build up your self-love, confidence, esteem, discipline, will power, determination, sense of self and personal pride. Spend the time proving to yourself that you are capable of beautiful powerful things.

    Eventually it will start to change your inside to match your outside.

    Or you could just bank on the scale fixing all your problems by showing you some magic number. Yeah you weigh the number you want, but you ignored all the mental things you were supposed to be handling and you didnt get stronger so now youre this droopy weak thing that weighs a perfect 110 pounds....

    personally I prefer becoming more awesome everyday on my own terms.
  • jakidb
    jakidb Posts: 1,010 Member
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    You're not unattractive though lady. I think we all have our "ugly" days but I think it's "mental". You are who you FEEL you are. Try focusing on you (outside of losing weight) and do things that make you happy. You'll find you won't have as many "unattrative" moments. You'd be surprise of what "treating yourself" does for ones overall feeling about themselves.
  • _Bob_
    _Bob_ Posts: 1,487 Member
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    It better!
  • harleydall76
    harleydall76 Posts: 586 Member
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    I honestly have to say the reason I find myself ugly is because of my skin. At 36, I have the same oily, acne prone I had a teen, worse in my opinion. That's the #1 reason I cannot see myself as ever being beautiful. Sadly, while I can lose weight, I cannot change my genetics. And the face is not something that can be hidden.
  • RedHeadDevotchka
    RedHeadDevotchka Posts: 1,394 Member
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    I keep hoping that losing weight will make me feel better about myself, but it doesn't. All I see is an ugly, podgy girl. I hate it!!!

    I too get attention..from guys I never would have ever attracted before, I don't know what they see in me and I still think I'm ugly. x x

    It''s such a horrible feeling!!!! x x x

    Same here. What is the matter with us all?
  • CJ_Holmes
    CJ_Holmes Posts: 759 Member
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    Women are taught that their main function is ornamental and their main value lies in their attractiveness. "Pretty" is A#1. Even being fully aware of this and consciously not buying into it doesn't exempt me.

    You can be so much more than something to look at. Lift weights! Learn a sport, a martial art, or a dance. Focus more on goals that are not appearance-oriented. People who are passionate and accomplished are the most attractive and more fun!

    We all take pleasure in feeling pretty and getting positive attention, and those often go hand-in-hand with losing weight or being more fit. Just be careful that that isn't what you're about.
  • contingencyplan
    contingencyplan Posts: 3,639 Member
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    I don't have any self hatred. I do not view myself as ugly. I did not even when I was obese at 335 lbs. I never at any point looked in a mirror and decided I hated what i saw. And I do not believe that anyone who can look in a mirror and legitimately use the word "hate" to describe what they see is in a position to be able to tackle weight loss and fitness in a healthy way.
  • mains1524
    mains1524 Posts: 12
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    i hope so but i doubt it will cure me i will prolly always see myself as the funny fat guy that is always in the friend zone lol

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