credit score is a deal breaker when dating? really??
Replies
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I can see how it can be important. But if a guy asked me that on a first date, it would be awkward and I would seriously walk away because it's none of their business until we get serious. Even then, A credit score? That in my opinion is weird to ask at all. I've been with my Fiance for 5 years now, and we have never really talked about a credit score before...so that means it's sooooo not important. at least to me.
also, which credit score? Equifax? Transunion? the other one? they aren't all going to be the same. do you take the average of all 3? how does this work in practice? :laugh:0 -
If you eventually intend to buy a house or car with a person, I can see it being an issue.0
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Hey Winner....what's your credit score baby? :laugh: :laugh: :bigsmile:
i'll show you mine if you show me yours. :happy:
Well how can I say no to that?? Rawwwrrrr :bigsmile:
in that case, how YOU doin'?
also, i'm going to need a copy of your resume, 3 character references, copies of your 2011 and 2010 state and federal tax filings, the name of your 4th grade teacher, and a handwriting sample.
:bigsmile:
(with apologies to Easywider for stealing his joke)0 -
Excuse me, while I go broker a deal between the credit rating companies and sites like match.com. We'll be able to tout mates that are not only compatible, but also fiscally responsible.
I smell profit!0 -
But you will likely only be asked this Q by someone with a good credit score.
It just ensures that fiscally responsible ppl hook up.
This conversation is less likely to come upbetween non fiscally responsible ppl.
......
Its just another way of saying relationships happen when ppl have similar values.0 -
the nicest, most compatible person ever, can become a nightmare when you have a relationship and they are INCREDIBLY irresponsible with their finances. Your life becomes a nightmare if you've lived your life being responsible and you find out they have $50,000 in credit card debt. Duh!
While certainly not a first date topic of conversation, eventually, any responsible adult will want to know about the financial ability of the person they are considering spending the rest of their life with. Student loans and a mortgage are some reasonable things to go into debt for, but I know that if I found out a girl I was dating had a crazy amount of credit card debt piled up to buy shoes and clothing, it would be a deal breaker.0 -
"How somebody treats their money is just another manifestation of how they treat the people around them."-- Suze Orman
Credit score shows a HUGE sign of responsibility. It's pretty important.
Wrong. When I was 23, I racked up a ton of medical bills. I offered to pay the hospital $50/month, which was all I could afford on top of rent and groceries. I didn't have cable, a cell phone, or internet, and my car was paid off. That was, seriously, all I could afford.
They turned me over to collections. It ruined my credit while paying it off (which I did).
I was not irresponsible. I was SICK. I'm sorry not everyone is lucky enough to afford $9000 in medical bills when they're 23 and finishing their degree while working (full-time, I might add).
I did the responsible thing by paying it off with as much money as possible every month. I wasn't some lazy bum who didn't pay her bills.0 -
What happened to falling in love with the person? If you are only looking for credit scores/money then you may be dating the "devil" as I will always believe that money is the root of all evil!
To me, a good credit score does not mean the person has a lot of money, just that they're responsible with it.
agree0 -
It is a sign of honesty & responsibility. I definitely would not want my good score messed up. You can't buy a house, etc. I know with this economy now things happen like someone loses their job so I would temper my reaction to the situation with the circumstances the person went thru.0
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Keep in mind credit isn't just credit cards and loans. It also includes medical bills. It's kind of hard to say, "Oh, sorry I can't have that emergency operation. I only make $32,000/year."
Also, things stay on there for seven years. People aren't often the same person at 31 as they were at 24.
What happens when someone has perfect credit then loses their job? Can you blame them if they decide to buy groceries and pay their mortgage instead of paying off their Visa every month?
I hope nothing bad happens to any of you judgemental people. Not everyone who has bad credit is "irresponsible". Life happens.0 -
This is my second marriage, if I was looking for a third he would have to have a great credit score, tons of money and a vacation home on some exotic island. :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
But when I was 18 we could have lived on love under a bridge. (BARF)0 -
"How somebody treats their money is just another manifestation of how they treat the people around them."-- Suze Orman
Credit score shows a HUGE sign of responsibility. It's pretty important.
Wrong. When I was 23, I racked up a ton of medical bills. I offered to pay the hospital $50/month, which was all I could afford on top of rent and groceries. I didn't have cable, a cell phone, or internet, and my car was paid off. That was, seriously, all I could afford.
They turned me over to collections. It ruined my credit while paying it off (which I did).
I was not irresponsible. I was SICK. I'm sorry not everyone is lucky enough to afford $9000 in medical bills when they're 23 and finishing their degree while working (full-time, I might add).
I did the responsible thing by paying it off with as much money as possible every month. I wasn't some lazy bum who didn't pay her bills.
I second this. I had huge (500k+) in medical bills by the time I was 20. Thankfully I had good insurance or I would have been sunk. If I hadn't it wouldn't have meant that I wasn't responsible. My husband and I own our car, both have jobs, pay all our bills with no assistance, and bought our house when we were 23/22. All it would have meant is I had a horrible pregnancy that went about as wrong as one can go and I couldn't afford to do 500+k in one lump sum.
Also, do not believe money is the root of all evil. I believe the love of money is the root of all evil.0 -
Hey Winner....what's your credit score baby? :laugh: :laugh: :bigsmile:
i'll show you mine if you show me yours. :happy:
Well how can I say no to that?? Rawwwrrrr :bigsmile:
in that case, how YOU doin'?
also, i'm going to need a copy of your resume, 3 character references, copies of your 2011 and 2010 state and federal tax filings, the name of your 4th grade teacher, and a handwriting sample.
:bigsmile:
(with apologies to Easywider for stealing his joke)
I happen to have all of that right here!!! I keep it handy just in case...you know...dating and what not! hahahaha0 -
Hey Winner....what's your credit score baby? :laugh: :laugh: :bigsmile:
i'll show you mine if you show me yours. :happy:
Well how can I say no to that?? Rawwwrrrr :bigsmile:
in that case, how YOU doin'?
also, i'm going to need a copy of your resume, 3 character references, copies of your 2011 and 2010 state and federal tax filings, the name of your 4th grade teacher, and a handwriting sample.
:bigsmile:
(with apologies to Easywider for stealing his joke)
I happen to have all of that right here!!! I keep it handy just in case...you know...dating and what not! hahahaha
you are a KEEPER! (provided of course you pass all necessary background checks. this offer void where prohibited).0 -
the nicest, most compatible person ever, can become a nightmare when you have a relationship and they are INCREDIBLY irresponsible with their finances. Your life becomes a nightmare if you've lived your life being responsible and you find out they have $50,000 in credit card debt. Duh!
While certainly not a first date topic of conversation, eventually, any responsible adult will want to know about the financial ability of the person they are considering spending the rest of their life with. Student loans and a mortgage are some reasonable things to go into debt for, but I know that if I found out a girl I was dating had a crazy amount of credit card debt piled up to buy shoes and clothing, it would be a deal breaker.
Yes and yes. All of that.
I pay my bills on time and don't buy things I can't afford. I'd kinda like to be with someone who can do the same. But like you said, it's not a first date topic. Definitely a before marriage topic, though. Maybe even a before serious relationship topic. I don't think it's a shallow consideration at all.
On the other hand, I might be willing to work through certain kinds of debt. For instance, I've known many people who missed a payment on things here or there when they were seriously ill. I don't think that's a sign of inherent personal irresponsibility as much as say, 10 credit cards maxed out at 10 different retail stores. You know what I mean...0 -
If someone has really bad credit and/or has other issues like didn't graduate from high school/college I would say that indicates someone who has bad habits and an inability to follow through. The exception being if they live in the US and have bad credit because of a medical problem. This has nothing to do with how much money they make. Some people who make very little money are very good with it and some people are horrendous no matter how much money they have. It points to poor decision making/planning skills which will undoubtedly seep into other parts of their lives. So unless it's medical yeah definitely a deal breaker.0
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"How somebody treats their money is just another manifestation of how they treat the people around them."-- Suze Orman
Credit score shows a HUGE sign of responsibility. It's pretty important.
It's a fantastic quote but sadly, I'd have to disagree with it. I once dated a guy who coveted his money. I should mention I made my own and never touched his. Anyway, he would have put his money on a pedestal if he could, but he didn't treat me even a quarter as well as he treated his money!
As for the original question, I agree with the people who say it's not a deal breaker. Unless it's something extreme and there's an obvious pattern of carelessness, I'd give it time and observe how responsible a person is with finances and everything in general.0 -
I think its more important how much debt someone has and how they are taking care of it rather then credit score. Even if its medical debt you should be taking action with it somehow. So I think for me its more a taking ownership thing then what your credit score is. Some people have never had credit or were really dumb in their late teens/early twenties and are completely responsible people now.0
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I think its more important how much debt someone has and how they are taking care of it rather then credit score. Even if its medical debt you should be taking action with it somehow. So I think for me its more a taking ownership thing then what your credit score is. Some people have never had credit or were really dumb in their late teens/early twenties and are completely responsible people now.
yup, yup. This is true. I was an idiot at 18/19 with credit, but I am a total tight wad, budget monger now.0 -
this has got to be an April Fools Day article posted months prematurely, right? because if not, this is INSANE.
http://finance.yahoo.com/news/perfect-10-never-mind-ask-015017521.html
I can can really only see this being a deal breaker for women.
More important to credit score to me is... can she ride a mechanical bull ?:bigsmile:0 -
Money is one of the main problems in marriages and one of the main reported causes for divorce. I put a bit of clout on it. Been there done that, still paying for it. It's not the first question out of my mouth, but I won't get tangled up with someone that has financial problems. It's not worth it.
Plus, people never think this crap out, but down the road it becomes important when you're buying a house together. Man, I was so pissed that my dumbass wife at the time, couldn't even be on the paperwork because her credit was so bad. I mean, WTF? We lived together, we were married, I couldn't figure out why she isn't just pay off her god damn bills.
If you've lived with it, you will understand the issue. Love is secondary, because over time, this issue will grind away at your relationship.0 -
I would be put off a bit by someone who got themselves into a bankruptcy due to absolutely excessive and poor spending habits, or by someone who flat out refused to work without a decent reason, but other than that, I couldn't care less if a girl I was dating made minimum wage or $30/hr.
I have good credit but a very paltry income, and I guess if that ever turns a woman away, then good riddance to her, lol.0 -
Every girl I engage with that's the first thing I'll ask. Clearly works every time...
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I see nothing wrong with this. If someone uses credit scores as part of their checklist, so be it. Better to know early than later that someone is not good with money.0
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LOL. I doubt anyone is asking these kinds of questions at the bar! However, it is one of those things that you probably care about if you are going to merge your financing with another person--when a relationship gets serious. It may give insight into their character because it reveals how they handle their responsibilities and commitments. Of course, as others have mentioned this is not necessarily a deal breaker but it could be if it revealed larger problems.
I couldn't agree more! I fell in love with a man whose credit score I didn't know. Right before our marriage, he "revealed" the trouble he was in. I called off the marriage, worked with him to get him on track. I later married him, and for 20 years suffered the consequences of his financial irresponsibility. We are now divorced, and he is still a mess with his finances. Unfortunately, it cost me dearly in the divorce.
As cruel as this article may make it sound; there is truth to it. Of course, there are exceptions, like those who don't use credit cards or borrow at all. Or others who have suffered because of a financially irresponsible partner/ex and are working hard to make their way back up the credit score ladder. But it isn't something to be taken lightly.0 -
one thing that you wont find are credit *kitten*0
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^This.It has become a big thing with people getting together. Some say if your significant other lies about how much money they owed can ruin the relationship. Then if they get married the other person is now on the hook for all of the debt0 -
Hm...I like long walks on the beach, candle light dinners and a man with a huge.....credit score
I gotta say I agree with this though - fiscal responsibility demonstrates maturity and responsibility. And, it's really sexy...sayin'.0 -
It's not something I would think to ask on a first date but I think long term it is important. I have my own home and a mortgage that I've worked hard for so I would not be keen to take on someone else's debt that may impact negatively on that. So I guess yes, I do consider it important to be with someone who is sensible with their finances.
I also think this is probably a sign of my age, I don't think it would not have crossed my mind when I was 20.0 -
I would be leery of someone who asks about my credit score on a first date. Why does this person need to know? Is he recruiting women with good FICO scores for identity theft scams? I also don't see how the response to the what's your credit score question is relevant. After all, how is the information to be verified? If my response passes the test, then do I have to provide verification from Equifax? Why does anyone need to be overwhelmed with a discussion of credit scores and financial history on a first date?
What happened to going out on a date to have fun and enjoy someone's company? You have plenty of opportunity down the road to find out if someone is financially responsible and on the same page. If you're spending time together and getting to know one another, surely you will get an indication of how this person handles money and credit and whether or not it meshes with how you handle yours.0
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