He told me he was embarrassed of me while I was pregnant!

this breaks my heart

He is nothing but a big bully. If your children were older and in relationships like this, I can GUARANTEE 100% you would be telling them to get out of what is quite obviously an extremely septic situation. Get out and save yourself and you children from this NASTY man.
:noway:

This has nothing at all to do with your weight, or your body, or even, really, your choice of partner. This has everything to do with your own mentality.

When you fall in love with a guy like this, it's understandable that you think he's oh-so-fantastic. The first few times he insults you, you brush it off as a bad day, and try to make him happy. You make little changes for Mr. Fantastic. Then he insults you some more, and you start to believe it. This is clearly the point you have reached. You somehow believe that your Mr. Fantastic is right, and you are a fat, ugly, PoS. WRONG!

You do not know how wrong you are, and you won't fingure it out until long after he is in your rearview mirror. Whatever your reason for staying, consider this: You now have two children that are learning from this guy. Two children that he will also train to believe they are less than their true worth. Two children who, if you stay with this guy, will grow up to be victims just like you.

Don't be his victim. Don't let your children be his victims. GTFO. Now.

Worry about your health once you take care of this infinitely more critical detail of your life.

I grew up in abussive home and to say it damaged me is an understatement, I have battled drug addiction, over eating, self estem issues, obessidy,and my ability to trust people. Please think about your kids and what they will go through if you decide to stay.
If you decide to put up with the abuse that is your choice but your kids have say.

You are just the type of woman selfish, insensitive, egotistical men like him prey on because you're easy targets. Your previous failed relationship combined with your stubborn refusal to even contemplate leaving him all indicate a deeply insecure woman.

I do not know him so I won't bad mouth him further but suffice it to say from what you've already said, he doesn't treat you very well. His comments about your weight are most assuredly NOT coming from a good place as there are far kinder, gentler ways of saying he wants you to lose weight without calling you an embarrassment and telling your the cruel things his family are saying behind your back.

I'll tell you what's going to happen. If you're lucky and determined, you'll lose the weight, get down to your goal and he'll somehow still find fault with you. He'll probably leave, or worse, cheat and you'll be a broken (yet thinner) mess.

Do you really want your children to grow up in a verbally abusive environment? Think of the kinds of lessons you'll be teaching them?

No, the pain will still be there. I've lost nearly 60lbs since the fall and the hurtful comments people made have still stuck with me. I can't even comprehend a compliment, let alone accept that they might be true. You'll be miserable and his words will always remain in the back of your mind.

Why are you with this *kitten*?

Why can't you leave? Pack up your stuff, grab your children and go. As long as you don't leave the area you are fine.

Why do you want to stay? Why do you want to change yourself for someone who is like that? Why do you want to put up with that and teach your children this kind of a relationship and abuse is ok?

Get out... don't look back.. just leave.

^^^ This. I totally don't understand why you've already resigned yourself to living this way for the rest of your life. I haven't read all of the comments, but I won't apologize if I'm reiterating what others have said, because the truth is - you need to hear it repeatedly, from multiple people. Maybe then (and I hope so) - it will sink in.

To be blunt (because I don't know any other way to be), he's an *kitten*. Any man who says and does the things that this man is doing/saying to you is not worth your time. He is an immature little boy who gets off on having control over women. It is up to YOU to not let him control you. You CAN get out. You CAN leave. You CAN make a better life for yourself and your children. This man is bad news. Trust me. Things will only get worse if you stay.

You need to believe in the fact that you are a beautiful woman and that you and your children deserve better. Staying in an abusive relationship is unhealthy not only for you, but especially for the kids. Please rethink your decision.

As you lose the weight you will gain confidence. You will start to see yourself in a whole new light. Take care of you right now and in the end you will come to the conclusion that you really are too good for him. You may be able to try and turn a blind eye now but in time it will eat away at you. You will never forgive him and what he has done. A relationship like this is toxic and not only does it affect you but your children. Do you really want to teach your son that it is ok to treat women like this? Forever is a really long time. Do you see yourself on twin scooters side by side holding hands riding into the sunset because that is who your "forever" should be. I wish you the best of luck! Take care of you and the rest will fall into place.

You need to live a better life for yourself. You can't have your children grow up in that type of household.

losing weight will not solve that problem with him........... you need to do it for all the right reasons.
im sorry that has happned to you.

I'm very sorry that your going through this, and I agree with the others about him.

PLEASE keep in mind what your children are going to see as normal with your relationship. I grew up in a messed up family and then married an abusive ahole it didn't stop until I finally put my foot down and said no more.

My ex could be your husbands twin!

Don't put yourself through this, the weight will not stay off when you are doing it under these conditions, it's not healthy psychically or emotionally.