Strangest thing you have heard a kid say
Replies
-
.0
-
My family was preparing to move to Iowa from Missouri and were trying to pump up our then 2 year olds about it. Their grandparents live in Iowa and I knew they would be excited abou that! I said "Deven, do you know who lives in Iowa?"
Very expectant pause, and then he responded with enthusiasm, "Jesus!?"
Please don't blow me up about the next statement. I honestly have NO idea where my kid heard this from.
Deven was telling me that he was too scared to go to the downstairs of the church alone. I asked him "why?" He responded that he was afraid of monsters.
Very seriously, I looked him in the face and said, "Honey, there are no such things as monsters! You have no reason to be afraid!"
He said, with wide eyes, "UH HUH, Mom, Barack Obama is a MONSTER!".0 -
Bump to read later... I'm trying to do it at work and I can't control laughing outloud!!!
Funny stuff people!0 -
Bump to read later!
I had to stop because I was laughing too loud at work!! :laugh: :laugh:0 -
My son (who is 3) is non stop entertainment.
An aunt was visiting once and she asked him did he have any money in his pockets. He said no so she pulls out the dollar and gives it to him. He proceeds to tell her he can't buy anything with a dollar. LOL.
Different day, he's getting out of the tub and as I'm toweling him off, he begins to slap his naked parts. I said "what are you doing?" He replies. "look mommy, I'm hitting my penis." I reply, "Why are you doing that? Stop it." He says. "It's big." I damn near fell on the floor.
I was also watching some movie and my son is very aware of bad words, but he's a smarty-pants about it. As soon as someone in the movie let out a choice word. He said "Awww. Mommy he said *kitten*. he's not supposed to say *kitten*. Why did that man say *kitten* when he's not supposed to say *kitten*. *kitten* is a bad word mommy." Thank you son. *sigh* lol.0 -
After giving my son (7 at the time) ginger ale for an upset stomach: "thanks mom. Now I know what my vomit is going to taste like later."0
-
Watching a movie with a couple kids I babysit where a character goes to jail. One was scared and had to close his eyes. The other one's response? "I want to go there when I grow up!"0
-
I work in a supermarket, and the other day a little kid (probably between 6-8yrs) came in with his mum.. They were both stood looking at the alcohol, and the boy said 'mum, please can i have a bottle of baileys?' His mum said 'no darling, not tonight' then the little boy then said 'PLEASE mum, i love Baileys!'
My face was shocked!!! My mouth dropped to the floor! I couldnt believe what this little boy had said to his mum!0 -
One day my 3 year old niece said , "I married Ethan. My boyfriend is Brandon. But I'm in love with the other Brandon."
She really thinks that she married Ethan because she was the flower girl and he was the ring bearer in my sister's wedding. I don't know what's up with the other two guys. LOL0 -
I've posted this before. .but It's so good!
So my kid sometimes requires me to squat in front of the toilet while he's on it and he lays his head down on my knees. . .don't ask. .
Anyway, he's laying down on my knees and he says "I like yours better, because when mommy does it, my head goes down there and I smell something weird. ."
Of course I almost choked to death at this point but I manage to say: "Oh really Russell, what does it smell like?". .
"I dunno. . Dead Squirrels?"
(don't worry, we're already divorced ) )
O.M.G.!!!!
I CAN'T STOP LAUGHING!!!!0 -
"take the damn picture"0
-
My little can't pronounce her L's very well. She's 3 and it's still hard for her, but not nearly as bad as it used to be. Anyhow, there was a 4th of July parade in our neighborhood and when the cars and "floats" went by with people waving "flags"...she starts screaming "LOOK, IT'S A FLAG PARADE; I LOVE FLAGS!!!" Only it didn't sound like flags with no L. lol. Luckily it was so noisy, no one else noticed what was really coming out of her mouth.
Unfortunately, it didn't play out that in Target when we were in the decor section and she spotted the "clocks". :blushing: And not just clocks. It was "mama, look at the great big clock!" and "hey, there's a little tiny clock; it's so cute". We've been working on telling time so she's SUPER excited about clocks...lmao
LMAO!!!!!!! OH. MY!!!!0 -
My coworker' s kids:
"What's my favorite food?"
"PINK"
"No I don't eat colors! Stop saying stuff!"0 -
"Mommy, why do octopussesses have 8 testicles?"0
-
I've posted this before. .but It's so good!
So my kid sometimes requires me to squat in front of the toilet while he's on it and he lays his head down on my knees. . .don't ask. .
Anyway, he's laying down on my knees and he says "I like yours better, because when mommy does it, my head goes down there and I smell something weird. ."
Of course I almost choked to death at this point but I manage to say: "Oh really Russell, what does it smell like?". .
"I dunno. . Dead Squirrels?"
(don't worry, we're already divorced ) )
oh my gawd. LOL!0 -
"Santa works at Wal-Mart"0
-
When my son was three he told me he didn't want to get married. I said "Oh really? Why?". He responded "Cause then I'd have to see their boobs.". I laughed and said "Well, I think you may change your mind someday."
When I told a friend of mine about the conversation she said "Well, it just goes to show ya, he's already thinking about them!".
that is so cute!0 -
My son to my dad: "papa, how old were you when the dinosaurs lived?"
That was two years ago and we still die laughing.0 -
When my son was 5 or 6 (he's 14 now) he called me an insolent wench.
I was laughing too hard to do anything about it.0 -
"Dad, why have you got boobies"
from my son when he was 7
working on losing the moobs0
Categories
- All Categories
- 1.4M Health, Wellness and Goals
- 392.9K Introduce Yourself
- 43.7K Getting Started
- 260.1K Health and Weight Loss
- 175.8K Food and Nutrition
- 47.4K Recipes
- 232.5K Fitness and Exercise
- 415 Sleep, Mindfulness and Overall Wellness
- 6.5K Goal: Maintaining Weight
- 8.5K Goal: Gaining Weight and Body Building
- 152.9K Motivation and Support
- 7.9K Challenges
- 1.3K Debate Club
- 96.3K Chit-Chat
- 2.5K Fun and Games
- 3.6K MyFitnessPal Information
- 23 News and Announcements
- 1.1K Feature Suggestions and Ideas
- 2.5K MyFitnessPal Tech Support Questions