Not Hating, Why Do Women Struggle With The Gym?

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  • Juanwi
    Juanwi Posts: 68 Member
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    When I went to an all female gym I loved it, and I went on a regular basis. When that gym closed down, and I had to go to a co-ed gym, I was constantly being creeped on. It really makes it uncomfortable to work out.
  • KatrinaWilke
    KatrinaWilke Posts: 372 Member
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    As a women, I have never understood why other women don't like going to the gym. So far most of the responses I have seen have been about being intimidated or embarassed. I am never intimdated or feel embarassed about needing a spot or help with something. In fact, a couple weeks ago, I had a 105lb barbell on my shoulders and was so tired I had to walk over to the guy next to me and ask him to help me get it off of me!! And if you don't know how to do something just ask for help. I promise you, no one is judging you or laughing at you.
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
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    My brother and sister are 7 and 8 years older than me. When they were teenagers they got a cheapy weight set. She used it as much as he was. I started using it when I was 12 or so. I started going to the highschool gym and the local rec center around 16. I never thought women lifting was "weird" or "wrong". I took weight lifting classes in high-school and college. So I've been lifting on and off since 12.
  • Briargrey
    Briargrey Posts: 498 Member
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    When you come to a gym, and you're not in shape, you get dissed a lot.
    People sneer at you, class leaders tell you you should lose weight before you show up, etc.
    Doesn't make for a conducive environment for workouts.
    They just want your money anyway, and don't give a crap about you.
    I've used gyms when in shape and not in shape, so I know the dif.

    Ugh. Definitely going to the wrong gyms then. I've never hard that. I sometimes feel insecure because I don't like not knowing how to do something, so until I've done it a few times and I'm used to it, then I get a bit anxious, but I just make myself get over it and slowly expand my gym experience. I'm sure there are some people who are all 'omg fat people at the Y' but no one overt, and I'd go straight to management if they were, especially if it was a class leader.
  • bcf7683
    bcf7683 Posts: 1,653 Member
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    I hate MY particular gym because they don't have an indoor track to do sprints in the winter time. But I don't think I'm going to find that anywhere but a college sports complex.... otherwise, I love me some gym time :drinker:
  • L4GFOREVER
    L4GFOREVER Posts: 27
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    I luv the gym!! The heavier the weight the better. Not sure who those women are. The gym does a body good, LOL!!!!!:laugh:
  • seilidhe
    seilidhe Posts: 1,042 Member
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    I go... but I'm always self-conscious. I totally lack any self-confidence and I'm embarassed by my size and appearance. (That is years and years of conditioning speaking there...) I use the elliptical thing as a warm up for the classes. And I take classes because I can "hide" in the group. I know that, probably, absolutely nobody is looking at me, but I still feel like all eyes are on me and the owners of those eyes are thinking "What the hell is *she* doing here?"

    I'm getting better at stomping that feeling down and getting on with my workout, but even in the small "fitness center" at my apartment complex... if someone comes in while I'm using the treadmill, or worse, the weight machine thing, I'm out of there as quickly as I can be.
  • kganc001
    kganc001 Posts: 317
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    Before my fiancee showed my proper lifting technique I was intimidated to lift with the big boys. Now I lift more than half of them. And smirk as I rub it in their faces. ;)

    I think it's a lot about self confidence. I didn't have any.
  • Mcgrawhaha
    Mcgrawhaha Posts: 1,596 Member
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    What are your generalizations based off of???? When I go to the gym I see MORE women than men working out and working out HARD. No self image issues etc. I believe you are NOT HATING but you are entirely oblivious to reality when it comes to women and the gym. Could be because you are a man and you are too concerned with your own self image and only paying attention to the other men that are in the gym to compare yourself to.

    Could also be the time you go to the gym is when ALL of the hard working women are home raising their families/kids etc.
    Might I suggest you study your generalization further by going to the gym at various times throughout the day and actually pay attention to how many women are in there busting *kitten*.

    I know many men who have way more "issues" about going to the gym than I do women! :)

    yes, I have noticed this at my gym... mornings, after about 730am, there are way more women, maybe they all just dropped their terrorists (kids) off at school as I do at that time... then, if I go in the evening, about 6pm or so, I see a lot of men, maybe just getting off work... I think on average, at my gym, man to woman ratio throughout the day is pretty even.
  • KatrinaWilke
    KatrinaWilke Posts: 372 Member
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    There aren't very many situations in life where I get skantily clad and go hang out in the same place as a bunch of strangers and demonstrate how strong, fast, and knowledgable about my body I am. Add in the extra pressure of being a woman and having no idea what you're doing and it's a pressure cooker!

    My little brother is in great shape and totally confident at the gym. He's never been overweight, but he's been lifing weights since he was 13. Why? Because the other boys were doing it, he played sports, AND there's that pressure to be muscular. I was not lifting at 13. I wasn't at the gym at 13. I played basketball, but we didn't hit the gym for that. Girls maybe went to the gym if they were overweight and hung out on the elliptical and that's about it. I think

    So here I am, 28 years old, and I'm walking into the gym for the first time at 28 years old (because why would I before I was overweight or an athlete, according to society) and I have no clue what the heck I'm doing. It sucked.

    Plus, there's always a guy that decides the bench press IMMEDIATELY behind me while I'm squatting and deadlifting and states at my *kitten* the entire time he's resting.

    I am just curious becaue I have never had a bad experience with the gym. Why did it suck? Were people mean to you or did you hurt yourself? Again, I am asking out of curiosity just to see what other peoples experience have been like.
  • micheleb15
    micheleb15 Posts: 1,418 Member
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    I also think it's because there were no role models like Jaime Eason or Camille Leblanc-Bazinet when I was growing up. I had Denise Austin and Daisy Fuentes doing Jazzercise or some crap on tv. There was never a woman on tv holding her own in a "man's" world of lifting heavy. I think if I were more exposed to the world of heavy lifting when I was younger, it would have been easier.

    However, I don't know how many younger girls there are out there lifting because they do have exposure to women lifters now. I never had the opportunity to say "I want to learn that" while watching lifters.
  • just_me_mindy
    just_me_mindy Posts: 210 Member
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    I played soccer growing up and played for 25 years, sometimes twice a day, I never stepped foot in a gym until I tore my ACL and quit playing soccer. I love the gym. I love the atmosphere and the competition. I love lifting heavy things and see how far i can push myself. I love the changes it making in my body. There is nothing better than the feeling of lifting more than you did the previous day. I feel sexy and strong after a workout.

    A lot of women don't like the gym, I believe, because they are unsure of what to do, they are worried they are getting judge and they find it boring..
  • Maddalen101
    Maddalen101 Posts: 307 Member
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    When you come to a gym, and you're not in shape, you get dissed a lot.
    People sneer at you, class leaders tell you you should lose weight before you show up, etc.
    Doesn't make for a conducive environment for workouts.
    They just want your money anyway, and don't give a crap about you.
    I've used gyms when in shape and not in shape, so I know the dif.

    Ugh. Definitely going to the wrong gyms then. I've never hard that. I sometimes feel insecure because I don't like not knowing how to do something, so until I've done it a few times and I'm used to it, then I get a bit anxious, but I just make myself get over it and slowly expand my gym experience. I'm sure there are some people who are all 'omg fat people at the Y' but no one overt, and I'd go straight to management if they were, especially if it was a class leader.

    Yah - I did that - it was a Pilates teacher from Paris who, instead of adjusting the exercises so that I could do them, told me I should not come to class if I'm so fat. Yes, I told the gym, and yes she was fired that day.
  • MsEndomorph
    MsEndomorph Posts: 604 Member
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    There aren't very many situations in life where I get skantily clad and go hang out in the same place as a bunch of strangers and demonstrate how strong, fast, and knowledgable about my body I am. Add in the extra pressure of being a woman and having no idea what you're doing and it's a pressure cooker!

    My little brother is in great shape and totally confident at the gym. He's never been overweight, but he's been lifing weights since he was 13. Why? Because the other boys were doing it, he played sports, AND there's that pressure to be muscular. I was not lifting at 13. I wasn't at the gym at 13. I played basketball, but we didn't hit the gym for that. Girls maybe went to the gym if they were overweight and hung out on the elliptical and that's about it. I think

    So here I am, 28 years old, and I'm walking into the gym for the first time at 28 years old (because why would I before I was overweight or an athlete, according to society) and I have no clue what the heck I'm doing. It sucked.

    Plus, there's always a guy that decides the bench press IMMEDIATELY behind me while I'm squatting and deadlifting and states at my *kitten* the entire time he's resting.

    I am just curious becaue I have never had a bad experience with the gym. Why did it suck? Were people mean to you or did you hurt yourself? Again, I am asking out of curiosity just to see what other peoples experience have been like.

    It sucked like losing my virginty sucked. No clue what I was doing, worried how I looked and what people (ok, in the virginity scenario "person") thought, and got out of there as fast as I could.

    Here's what my tour was like: So, this is the child care area. Blah blah blah 10 minutes about it. This is the group fitness area which is probably what you're most interested in. Blah blah blah 10 minutes about it. And here's the cardio stuff. When you're more advanced you can work your way over to those machines over there and follow the circuit (seriously a circuit of at least 30 machines.). The end.
  • tracieangeletti
    tracieangeletti Posts: 432 Member
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    I am 47. I'm hoping things have changed some but when I was growing up strength training for females was never even discussed. You just did not do it. None of the girls did. We were taught to be on vlcd and told to do cardio until you dropped. By the time I was thirteen all the girls were dieting and I had already been on several weird and wacky diets. Anyone remember the Beverly Hills diet? Nothing to eat but watermelon for a day and the next day nothing but grapes. I think most of the problems with women and gyms are we just don't know much about anything but cardio. Still to this day the trainers at the gym ask me why I'm lifting heavy. One of them keeps telling it's just going to "bulk" me up. This is a trainer telling me this. SO annoying.
  • 1princesswarrior
    1princesswarrior Posts: 1,242 Member
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    I'm self-conscious and have social anxiety as well but I still go to the gym. I just don't want to make anyone mad if I don't know the right etiquette. I go to a gym that has a female only side and a co-ed side and I find it's actually less stressful on the co-ed side, the men and women seem to know more and are way more helpful when you ask questions. But I've always been a tomboy anyway so maybe that's why. It also helps working with a trainer.
  • nathalier71
    nathalier71 Posts: 570 Member
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    I don't like the gym because I don't like to exercise =)

    If I'm going to exercise, I don't want to wait for machines, I don't want people around me, I don't want to smell people's sweat, the list goes on and on! All excuses not to exercise I guess!

    Funny thing is I used to go to the gym - a long time ago - and didn't mind it then... maybe once I'm a little fitter I'll get back into it...
  • KatrinaWilke
    KatrinaWilke Posts: 372 Member
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    Because creepers gonna creep

    It's funny how many woman complain about the men staring at them. I am happily married and am not looking to hook up with anyone. But I find myself staring at everyone especially the buff guys.
  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member
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    I believe it's because of magazines and media endorsing stupid broscience methods to losing weight and attaining a shape. And it starts young.

    I've noticed that girls in middle school are trying to abstain from doing physical fitness (some due to sweating, messing up their hair, or because puberty is making it harder for them) and don't know if it carries on through high school. Personally, except for female athletes, I've never known any girl growing up that just went to the gym to lift and get stronger.

    It's changing now though. May take another decade or so for some to see that the resistance training really is the ticket to a better body and not the crazy BS diets and scams that are still being passed around.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    Which is exactly why I am kicking myself to the gym... with a daughter that is a toddler, I want her to have some one right in front of her face that she has exposure to that she can look up to and learn how to take care of her body.

    To the OP, the only reason I struggle is because I need direction. I have no issues with using weights or going heavy or any of the typical "issues" that women may face... But I have a heard time creating a routine that works and sticking with it and so I get lost and give up... However, I have now taken the plunge with NROL4W and it gives me a routine to stick to AND it's varied so I don't get bored with it.

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