Not Hating, Why Do Women Struggle With The Gym?
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I personally don't hate the gym... I just prefer getting exercise elsewhere. I live in Maine and still run outside in the winter (talk about treacherous conditions, man) because I don't like working out inside, and summer runs are awesome. A treadmill just isn't the same as a run on a trail or through a park. Plus, I don't know much about weightlifting- so no point in going to the gym for that. All my abs stuff I can do at home too.
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I don't like the gym because I don't like to be around people in the evenings after spending the entire day dealing with them. I tend to be a little anti-social & stingy with my time anyway. I have an exercise room that I have outfitted over the years. I hate earbuds and I can blast the music as loud as I want. I can park in my own driveway and since it's in my house I have no excuses not to do it.
Bonus, as my children have grown into teens, I gave them the key code & added things specifically for them. My oldest son loves the punching bag, my youngest the rebounder, all of them use the universal machine. They go there to relieve boredom and work off stress just like I do. Stuck on that essay? Go pound the bag for a while until you get your head around it, son.0 -
I am NOT hating. Just asking because this really interests me. IMO it's because they think it's all about running and loosing weight, and it's tied even deeper to their self-image than with men. Not to mention that women are not encouraged to be physically strong/able like men are.
I know many, many women like the gym, but I'm making a general statement here.
Discuss.
My question, why do so many women do those inner thigh leg machine in their tight little workout outfits?
Why not?0 -
IMO it's because they think it's all about running and loosing weight, and it's tied even deeper to their self-image than with men. Not to mention that women are not encouraged to be physically strong/able like men are.
There are men that think losing weight is all about running and who fear getting bulky (or even gaining any muscle at all!). Different people have different goals and they aren't all tied to gender expectations.
I just don't like exercise much and it doesn't seem worth it when you look at how long it takes me to burn off a small amount of calories. If I have to work out an hour to burn off a cookie I'd rather just not eat it and spend my time doing something I enjoy instead. So all I do is bike for transportation.0 -
My question, why do so many women do those inner thigh leg machine in their tight little workout outfits?
I do the inner thigh machine with sweat pants on, so I can't relate. 0 -
I don't like the gym because I don't like to be around people in the evenings after spending the entire day dealing with them. I tend to be a little anti-social & stingy with my time anyway. I have an exercise room that I have outfitted over the years. I hate earbuds and I can blast the music as loud as I want. I can park in my own driveway and since it's in my house I have no excuses not to do it.
Bonus, as my children have grown into teens, I gave them the key code & added things specifically for them. My oldest son loves the punching bag, my youngest the rebounder, all of them use the universal machine. They go there to relieve boredom and work off stress just like I do. Stuck on that essay? Go pound the bag for a while until you get your head around it, son.
Can I come over?
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Lol I wish I could! I tried signing up for this coaching program they have at my gym, but all the girl did was point me to a machine and says "Ok, just do this. 3 sets of 12" and then walks away, comes back and does the same thing for another machine. And it is always the same machines everytime and I am never sore. I wanted to use the free weights and do things using my body weight because the machines and me don't get along but she said that "beginners should stay on machines". Soo after 4 weeks of machines and the same thing each time I got fed up. And now I'm nervous to go back in there because I haven't been in so long.
well if you are ever in NJ- come visit me- I shall take you to ze gym and teach you proper lifting.
we will have fun. and then you will drop weights on your feet because you laugh to much- which is why people refuse to lift with me.
If you are paying for a coaching program- insist on someone to teach you BARBELL training. Seriously. If you are paying for it- you better be getting what you want out of it.
Machines are great for injuries or just getting started- but they are limited- and given the right amount of time and some situational awareness- anyone can figure out how they work. BB training can be learned via internet but coaching is better- but if you are paying for something- get what you want- tell the sales manager you don't appreciate it- because anyone can EVENTUALLY figure out how to use a machine.
Seriously- all of you if given that machine- in your own home- you would be able to figure it out- you don't because it's nerve wrackign doing it in front of strangers- which I understand- but paying someone to put you on it and tell you reps then walk away is waste of your money and time. Insist on proper coaching with free weights and bar bells. Seriously. You don't need someone to slap you on a machine.
I agree! I Love my first PT and we are still good friends but that is mainly what she did. I learned alot about the machines and did lose weight as a cardio bunny. It didn't stay off. She understood her limitations and had me begin working out with the other PT. She said I needed to step up my games. He is a strength coach. He has taught me soo much! She did too because when I started, I needed the cardio and the machines. Now, I can't wait to see how much more I can lift from last week! It is soo empowering to compete with yourself!
I have family in Jersey so I may look you up! Know any Milevois?0 -
well if you are ever in NJ- come visit me- I shall take you to ze gym and teach you proper lifting. we will have fun. and then you will drop weights on your feet because you laugh to much- which is why people refuse to lift with me.
If you are paying for a coaching program- insist on someone to teach you BARBELL training. Seriously. If you are paying for it- you better be getting what you want out of it.
Machines are great for injuries or just getting started- but they are limited- and given the right amount of time and some situational awareness- anyone can figure out how they work. BB training can be learned via internet but coaching is better- but if you are paying for something- get what you want- tell the sales manager you don't appreciate it- because anyone can EVENTUALLY figure out how to use a machine.
Seriously- all of you if given that machine- in your own home- you would be able to figure it out- you don't because it's nerve wrackign doing it in front of strangers- which I understand- but paying someone to put you on it and tell you reps then walk away is waste of your money and time. Insist on proper coaching with free weights and bar bells. Seriously. You don't need someone to slap you on a machine.
I agree! I Love my first PT and we are still good friends but that is mainly what she did. I learned alot about the machines and did lose weight as a cardio bunny. It didn't stay off. She understood her limitations and had me begin working out with the other PT. She said I needed to step up my games. He is a strength coach. He has taught me soo much! She did too because when I started, I needed the cardio and the machines. Now, I can't wait to see how much more I can lift from last week! It is soo empowering to compete with yourself!
I have family in Jersey so I may look you up! Know any Milevois?
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I'm glad you had good success!!! That's awesome.
Unfortunately no I don't- sounds like it would be a north thing- I'm around Philly to be honest- bu tif I run into one- I'll make sure I make an awkward comment about maybe meeting family on MFP with the same name cause you know- being awkward is what makes social settings worth the effort. GIGGLE GIGGLE. 0 -
When you come to a gym, and you're not in shape, you get dissed a lot.
People sneer at you, class leaders tell you you should lose weight before you show up, etc.
Doesn't make for a conducive environment for workouts.
They just want your money anyway, and don't give a crap about you.
I've used gyms when in shape and not in shape, so I know the dif.
I think it really depends on the gym that you go to. Each gym has a different feel to it for everybody. You have to find one that you feel best at if you choose to go to a gym at all. I feel really comfortable at my gym being at least 50 lbs overweight in the classes. That being said, I haven't tried doing too much on the floor mainly because I am at a loss as to what to do. I don't want to look like I don't have some sort of routine... even though I don't! lol I think working with a trainer or finding a regimen to try to follow would be beneficial.0 -
But... weights are not the only things found in a gym, correct? I don't lift heavy but I spend a lot of time in the gym. I also agree with the posters that said women do attend the gym in as large of numbers as the gentlemen. Just check out our classes and all the posts asking why women like Zumba and men don't??
To be honest, I'm one of the brainwashed ones because I simply don't understand the point of being "strong" if not to look good. Growing up, I carried my 25L water keg from the borehole to my dorm about an eighth of a mile away so I do have basic strength to do day to day activities without picking up heavy round metal stuff. Just doesn't sound like a good time to me, is all.0 -
Love the gym. Love to workout.
But I will always have that self concious side that thinks people are looking at me, talking about me, and judging me.
Thats just who I am. 0 -
Don't know what you mean by struggle....I've never seen a woman struggle at the gym, liking different exercise to you doesn't mean they struggle. I could outrun any one of the men at my old gym, and they could out lift me0
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I'm thinking of joining the gym and I will only be using the weight training section but im nervous because its covered in boys doing bicep curls with too tight teeshirts on and fake tans and I want to train hard and dirty but im worried ill get bullied or feel like I shouldnt be there. I'd rather go to Defranco gym than this overly expensive thing.0
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I'm thinking of joining the gym and I will only be using the weight training section but im nervous because its covered in boys doing bicep curls with too tight teeshirts on and fake tans and I want to train hard and dirty but im worried ill get bullied or feel like I shouldnt be there. I'd rather go to Defranco gym than this overly expensive thing.
You pay to be there too.
no one hassels me- and I ONLY train over there. We have cardio up top- machines on the right and free weights on the left.
I kick boys off my squat rack if I'm using it and I step away and they think it's theirs- I take weights off the rack 2 inches from some idtio who MUST curl in front of the rack. You pay to use it- you may use it.
going at 5 PM is hard- EVERYONE is there- but the thing is- the gym is a culture. Once you get past that first couple of visits- and you are there a lot- you start seeing the same people- they see you- you see them it's normal. They know you work hard- and that's it. Don't need to make friends- but you can be friendly.
just go in off peak hours- you'll be fine.0 -
Well my gym isn't too bad. It's quite small, especially the free weights area so you can end up quite close to others.
Have I felt intimidated, sure I have. As a beginner it's to be expected, but so far no one has said anything or given me dodgy looks.
They may be thinking 'Look at that fat plonker, who does he think he is?' but they don't say it.
Maybe its because it's a British gym, and we are often reluctant to talk to strangers, too polite etc, but in this case that could be a good thing.0 -
I have just started at a new gym and am a bit intimidated as it is bigger and lots more/ different equipment. But I tell myself I was like that starting at my old gym and I got used to it, felt like home after a year or so...ho hum0
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I hear ya! I am not a fan of the gym either and never will be. I just don't like to exercise with other people around nor do I like to share sweat on the machines. I just feel like some gyms are just a big parade for gym rats and people who like attention. I am a loner and prefer to exercise alone. I like home videos or working out outside or at fun venues like rock climbing or swimming. Plus if I go somewhere fun to exercise it's easy to drag the kiddos along and keep them entertained. They especially love the Phoenix Rock Gym for that very reason. I admire you for sticking with it and giving the gym a try but if after a few months you still aren't into it, don't be afraid to find a different method to exercise. Exercise is all about what's right for you individually.0
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I think a very large part of it is that women are afraid that they will be judged as somehow "imperfect" --- too fat, too thin, to muscular, too this, not enough that.... ironically, because THEY ARE SO HARSHLY JUDGMENTAL of others. (Come on now, tell the truth to yourself, you KNOW you've got that little voice in your head that says things like "look at that fatso...").
And then you get to my age and it doesn't matter any more. :-D
Trainerbarb
NASM Certified Personal Trainer
AEA Certified Aquatics Professional0 -
I hate gym, can't last for a session. Firstly, I have never seen the scale move after weight training, I look better but that's it. Secondly, I prefer running outside, hate the treadmill. Lastly, I feel so sore the next day and sometimes my knee gets injured.0
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Sorry to revive this old topic but it's interesting to me as well and I'm female and don't struggle with the gym. I consider myself more knowledgeable about working out than 90 percent of the guys at my gym. I go to a commercial gym in L.A where it's supposedly very aesthetic oriented; lots of wannabe actors/models even a few famous people at my gym. However 90 percent of men are pathetically weak and work out with improper form....
I don't know why women are so afraid of doing something wrong when pretty much almost all the guys I see are doing something wrong. I can only count 2 or 3 times that I have seen guys do a FULL SQUAT; never seen ATG at my gym, majority of guys quarter squat or go down an inch. Many deadlift LIGHT weight (like 135lbs, 155 lbs) with horrible form and a rounded back. Mind you i am under 100 lbs and can easily deadlift 135lbs... Also see many weak guys bench pressing weak weight like 95 lbs... lol or with horrible form not using full ROM, bar going down an inch etc....
Guys get in my way all the time and I have to tell the loser bouncing around on a swiss ball in the SQUAT RACK doing exercises to GTFO so I can squat. Most guys don't even squat or deadlift but only leg press and therefore have unaesthetic looking bodies that are not in proportion. Many guys I have noticed also don't have a CLUE as to what they are doing and using high reps on machines... Afraid to touch the barbells... I also laugh at weak guys curling 50 lbs (The bar with 2.5 lbs on each side) in the squat rack. I should tape it next time. I am serious; this stuff really happens at my gym. I also smirk at the guy who moans like he is having an orgasm but doing flys with only 25 lbs? lol.... That to me just shows how weak someone must be to make that kind of noise to lift such light weight. And then drawing more attention to how weak you are by groaning so loud? ok.
Also LOL at people afraid of using machines. Are you serious? Machines are for people afraid to use the barbell and free weights. I use the barbell and free weight 95 percent of the time.
Also, what is up with people not knowing how to do an exercise or use a machine?? Do you even Google? Do you even internet? Do you youtube? ANYTHING that you could ever want to know to do, make, build or use can be found using the freaking internet. That is not just about fitness but for anything pretty much. If worst comes to worst take a pic and ask about it online. People who take the time to research about fitness probably know more than most trainers out there who don't know jack.
As for staring; I intimidate most of the guys there. One time someone stared at me and I slammed the weight down that I was deadlifting and stared menacingly at him and he got scared and walked away (as he should). If you don't want to get bothered WEAR HEADPHONES. No one is able to even offer me advice or talk to me because I will point to my heeadphones and say " I AM BUSY". If they ask me if I want advice I say "NO".... you are not obligated to have a conversation with anyone at the gym. Stop being so darn passive and become a predator like me... lol
Personally I love the gym. I like to train hard and lift heavy. I like to be aesthetic. I love lifting more than weak guys and I am obnoxious about. I am not intimidated by anyone (I flex between sets). 0 -
I have no idea what you're talking about. I've worked in the fitness industry for 7 years, and there have always been more women at the gym than men. Maybe not as many women lifting heavy free weights, but they are there, and sculpting and HIIT classes are always much more heavily attended by women. Women love the gym.0
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I have no idea what you're talking about. I've worked in the fitness industry for 7 years, and there have always been more women at the gym than men. Maybe not as many women lifting heavy free weights, but they are there, and sculpting and HIIT classes are always much more heavily attended by women. Women love the gym.
imho those classes are useless. Lifting heavy with linear progression is where it's at. Most of the women in the classes look the same and not firm or toned. All the girls with nice bodies are lifting heavy. Those classes are completely useless to me and I'm female. Sculpting? lol ... just lol...0 -
I personally love the gym.....but it's a new thing! I was slim to start with...maybe tooo slim and wanted to get bigger and stronger!
I think girls are afraid of lifting weights because they think they'll get big and manly....which couldn't be further from the truth....you gain curves in the right places!!! I've gained 1 stone since I've been training but am smaller than ever around the parts that count, girls forget that muscle weighs more than fat as a size comparison!
A lot of it is self confidence...I've got a pt who has made me very comfortable in the gym....I would highly recommend doing this to start off with, the cost is well worth the confidence it gives you.
I also found that as a beginner I didnt' know what to do...I went to get on the treadmill as every other girl does...which isn't going to do anything for my goals!
My gym has a ladies only area....which is full of ladies like you describe who don't really want to be there, run and crosstrain for hours or are self conscious and sit around chatting a lot - needless to say I spend very little time in there...the only good thing about this area is that the dumbells I need are ALWAYS available as the only ones that get used are the 1kg 2kg and sometimes even the 3kg! I can guarantee that the 10kg will always be available!
It's been a learning curve for me but I can now plan my 5/6 days of workouts by body part and have a good routine, Pt or no pt!0 -
I don't know about you but where I live there's a lot more women in the gym then men. Making all kinds of gains.0
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Why do people spell the word lose or losing with two o's?
Discuss.0 -
For me its self-confidence.
When I first joined my gym, I had no idea how to do any free weight exercises. My trainer has been taking me more into the free weights area as I get in better shape, but thats only once a week. The other 2 days I lift, I dont have a partner or my partner cant lift as heavy as me, so I either use the machines or body weight resistance with TRX.
I have horrible problems with my left knee so I have not been able to do any squats, its so painful to bend my knee that deep. Hopefully next month when I see the ortho doctor, they can do something about it.
But I'm a work in progress! Eventually I'll be able to walk up to a guy and ask him to spot me on the bench press.0 -
For me its self-confidence.
When I first joined my gym, I had no idea how to do any free weight exercises. My trainer has been taking me more into the free weights area as I get in better shape, but thats only once a week. The other 2 days I lift, I dont have a partner or my partner cant lift as heavy as me, so I either use the machines or body weight resistance with TRX.
I have horrible problems with my left knee so I have not been able to do any squats, its so painful to bend my knee that deep. Hopefully next month when I see the ortho doctor, they can do something about it.
But I'm a work in progress! Eventually I'll be able to walk up to a guy and ask him to spot me on the bench press.
I don't need a spotter for anything. I do bb squats but in the rack with safety bars so it can be dropped.
As for bench I am not benching over 100 lbs yet so I can easily roll it down my body and do the "roll of shame".... I also do not use collars when benching so i can tip it and roll the plates off. It's not a big deal if it's light and under 100 lbs... If benching over a plate then i can see why I would need a spotter but as of now it's easy to roll the weight off...0 -
So I didn't read through every comment and this might have already been said, but it's tough for women at the gym. I work out on campus at my university 5 days a week in the weight room. Sometimes I'm the only girl there with 20-30 guys. There aren't many days that go by where a guy comes up at says something discouraging or rude. This morning, a gentleman walked up to me and corrected my form. (granted my form on that exercise wasn't great... protecting an injury + being stubborn and using weight that was a little too much for it) But he correct my form, I politely thanked him, then he goes on a rant about how I'm a typical woman who doesn't know what I'm doing and should be in the weight room. (but I work in a gym and am just about to take my acsm cert).
I know what I'm doing and its still intimidating to walk into the weight room. Most of the girls I talk to on campus are terrified. Now, I'm not saying all guys are like this. Most are awesome, but there are enough there that it can suck to be a girl at the gym.0 -
Sorry to revive this old topic but it's interesting to me as well and I'm female and don't struggle with the gym. I consider myself more knowledgeable about working out than 90 percent of the guys at my gym. I go to a commercial gym in L.A where it's supposedly very aesthetic oriented; lots of wannabe actors/models even a few famous people at my gym. However 90 percent of men are pathetically weak and work out with improper form....
I don't know why women are so afraid of doing something wrong when pretty much almost all the guys I see are doing something wrong. I can only count 2 or 3 times that I have seen guys do a FULL SQUAT; never seen ATG at my gym, majority of guys quarter squat or go down an inch. Many deadlift LIGHT weight (like 135lbs, 155 lbs) with horrible form and a rounded back. Mind you i am under 100 lbs and can easily deadlift 135lbs... Also see many weak guys bench pressing weak weight like 95 lbs... lol or with horrible form not using full ROM, bar going down an inch etc....
Guys get in my way all the time and I have to tell the loser bouncing around on a swiss ball in the SQUAT RACK doing exercises to GTFO so I can squat. Most guys don't even squat or deadlift but only leg press and therefore have unaesthetic looking bodies that are not in proportion. Many guys I have noticed also don't have a CLUE as to what they are doing and using high reps on machines... Afraid to touch the barbells... I also laugh at weak guys curling 50 lbs (The bar with 2.5 lbs on each side) in the squat rack. I should tape it next time. I am serious; this stuff really happens at my gym. I also smirk at the guy who moans like he is having an orgasm but doing flys with only 25 lbs? lol.... That to me just shows how weak someone must be to make that kind of noise to lift such light weight. And then drawing more attention to how weak you are by groaning so loud? ok.
Also LOL at people afraid of using machines. Are you serious? Machines are for people afraid to use the barbell and free weights. I use the barbell and free weight 95 percent of the time.
Also, what is up with people not knowing how to do an exercise or use a machine?? Do you even Google? Do you even internet? Do you youtube? ANYTHING that you could ever want to know to do, make, build or use can be found using the freaking internet. That is not just about fitness but for anything pretty much. If worst comes to worst take a pic and ask about it online. People who take the time to research about fitness probably know more than most trainers out there who don't know jack.
As for staring; I intimidate most of the guys there. One time someone stared at me and I slammed the weight down that I was deadlifting and stared menacingly at him and he got scared and walked away (as he should). If you don't want to get bothered WEAR HEADPHONES. No one is able to even offer me advice or talk to me because I will point to my heeadphones and say " I AM BUSY". If they ask me if I want advice I say "NO".... you are not obligated to have a conversation with anyone at the gym. Stop being so darn passive and become a predator like me... lol
Personally I love the gym. I like to train hard and lift heavy. I like to be aesthetic. I love lifting more than weak guys and I am obnoxious about. I am not intimidated by anyone (I flex between sets).
Honestly, you sound exactly like the type of person who makes lifting weights intimidating for others, judgmental and obnoxious.0
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