Why is this even remotely controversial?

If you dont want to you dont have to.

You dont see people screaming and yelling at the USAF Propaganda that's all like

BE THE BEST YOU CAN BE - IN THE ARMY TODAY

because they not only dont want to be in the military, but they are completely and entirely offended that America just yelled at them personally and said they arent the best they can be unless they are in army.

ridiculous.

You dont want to be in the army - dont be in the army.
You dont want an awesome body - fine - dont have one.
You dont want to be a fit sexy mom? - fine - dont be.
You dont want to wear workout clothes around your kids cause it makes you creepy - i dont know what to tell you, you're already creepy.
You dont want to lift weights? fine - dont - there isnt much room in the weight room to begin with.
You dont want to run a marathon - fine who cares - no one will make you
You dont want to have kids or go to college? fine dont
You want to find a sugar daddy and quit your job and just eat cheerios and celery all day - that's your decision.
You want to dedicate yourself to fitness and compete? fine - you go for it.
You dont need excuses? HIGH FIVE
You get pissed when someone asks if you use excuses? ANGTFT

Wonder how this would have went if it was a dude that posted a pic and stated the same thing?

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

it is not even comparable, dudes are not expected to invest the same amount of time in childrearing; their bodies aren't completely messed with by the invasion of another creature, there is not the same unreasonable expectation to maintain youthful beauty all through life, and the accusation of laziness if that doesn't happen (and men are thought attractive into their later years even if they don't work out), etc etc etc.

it is not problematic because women are "catty", jesus effing.

if a male cover model had a pretty face, though, some men might cut him down by calling him a pretty boy (and taking that where it often goes). if he was more rugged looking and tough, or else just cool, they would want to be more like him.

women are no longer expected to spend most of their time child rearing - and dads are a million times more involved than they were before the 70s and 80s - they are doing their dangedest to do at least half the work and girls are STILL morning about how much work they have to do to be a mom - when being a mom is all they ever wanted in their tiny little world. then they get what they want and its like ermergerd too much work. TOO BAD. This is everything youve been dreaming about since you found someone willing to put a ring on it -_-

It IS problematic because women are catty and we've evolved over the last 500 years in competition with each other. And yes - women do hold their weight differently and deal with different kinds of hormonal effects and yes we can grow a person inside of us - but its not freaking mandatory to have kids. And there's no rule saying you cant be healthy and exercise WHILE youre pregnant and you dont have to wait until maternity leave is over to get in a workout here and there or eat right - especially if youre going to breastfeed.

No im not a mom. No Im not married. No I dont have kids. No i dont think that if i was married with a kid, would i have the right answers - of course not - i know im not perfect.

but i do know that ive been living a very healthy active lifestyle for many years now and that when / if i do end up in a situation with kid(s) in my life - then i will still be active (more active because kids) still be eating healthy (healthier because kids).

because im the kind of person who looks for all the possible ways of making something happen. Im NOT the kind of person that would rather sit around and talk about all the reasons it wouldnt work for me, all the people who wouldnt have success, all the things that could pop up and throw me off course, all the what if's and buts and exceptions that i keep stockpiling to prove that i cant be successful.

and also - regarding those comments yesterday - if Im ever at the beach, building sandcastles with the kids and getting all grimy and someone tells me im creepy for being in a bikini when im playing with my kids on the beach - i would slap them across the face so hard that they'd break through a plateau and hit a mini goal.

Only people who already have something psychologically wrong up there - would accuse a mother of being creepy with her own children, just because she's hanging out with them and wearing a two piece.

The fact that youve had children does not revoke your right to being sexy or provocative. If anything, you're allowed to be sexier than regular girls.

If you put as much effort into taking action and working with the plan you found that does work for you - as the amount of effort that people put in here - spending hours talking about everything that doesnt work (facepalm - in what universe is that productive) or wont work or why it wont work - yall would all be able to look back at this ad and mental high five yourself for not having excuses either.

People who have legitimate reasons for not being in the best shape they can be - or not being able to work toward it - probably wont be offended by this picture because she obviously wasnt aiming it at people with REASONS. She was aiming it at people who have EXCUSES - and sure enough - just like every time you bring up that word, the ones that get hell bent out of shape are the ones that arent making much progress - if any, who are famous for writing long explanations of why they cant do anything, who are always complaining about not wanting to work out or are always forgiving themselves for a binge and saying its a NEW DAY! (its NOT, by the way, a new day - your body is the same one it was yesterday, with the same binge in your intestines) or who are too afraid to work out where someone might see them giving a frak. They have angry bitter mugshot profile pictures (or flowers, field or a cat) and instead of just walking past something that doesnt motivate them or doesnt apply to them, they pop a squat, sink into a big old lazyboy, grab their keyboard, move their snacks to the side, crack their knuckles and smile to themselves and get ready to shoot down every optimistic person who makes the mistake of walking into this thread and having the nerve to believe in themselves - or WORSE - to be a walking example that it IS possible.

Because its not - and there are a lot of people here on MFP who are only here to keep people from seeing any success. because they arent seeing any.

What's my excuse?

I dont have any. Im kicking tush, Maria. High Five!

Ok so first me:

- I don't have kids

- Until this summer when I got tendinosis in my shoulder and ankle, along with runner's knee & arthritis in both knees, i successfully maintained a 50-lb loss for over 2 years; i've gained 10 back & am working on that now

Sorry, but, though some men today are better than their fathers probably were about this, the research overwhelmingly says that women are STIIIIIIIIILL having to run things at home. Some estimates have it at ~80% of the domestic labour (when, both partners are working).

That problem is FAR FROM OVER

Sorry, but, though some men today are better than their fathers probably were about this, the research overwhelmingly says that women are STIIIIIIIIILL having to run things at home. Some estimates have it at ~80% of the domestic labour (when, both partners are working).

Sorry, but, though some men today are better than their fathers probably were about this, the research overwhelmingly says that women are STIIIIIIIIILL having to run things at home. Some estimates have it at ~80% of the domestic labour (when, both partners are working).

I do the vast majority of the housework in my home. Not because my SO is unable or unwilling to do it, but because I'm a it of a control freak and also like things a little neater than he does. He's content to run the vacuum once a week while I like to do it three or four times a week.

I wash dishes by hand every night and do 90% of the laundry. Yet, I find time to lounge in front of the TV, exercise, write and read along with a full-time job and a pretty active social life.

If women are doing 80% of the housework in their homes and they aren't happy about it, they need to discuss it with their SOs and change it. It really i sthat simple.

Don't make yourself a martyr and then ask for my sympathy.

Sorry, but, though some men today are better than their fathers probably were about this, the research overwhelmingly says that women are STIIIIIIIIILL having to run things at home. Some estimates have it at ~80% of the domestic labour (when, both partners are working).

I do the vast majority of the housework in my home. Not because my SO is unable or unwilling to do it, but because I'm a it of a control freak and also like things a little neater than he does. He's content to run the vacuum once a week while I like to do it three or four times a week.

I wash dishes by hand every night and do 90% of the laundry. Yet, I find time to lounge in front of the TV, exercise, write and read along with a full-time job and a pretty active social life.

If women are doing 80% of the housework in their homes and they aren't happy about it, they need to discuss it with their SOs and change it. It really i sthat simple.

Don't make yourself a martyr and then ask for my sympathy.

LOL ok I'm also single at the moment, as it happens. This is not about me personally, at all. (and I'm no martyr btw)

One reason you might be a control freak about it, is you've been socialized to clean -- to notice dust, etc; to know what to do with it; to feel uncomfortable in its presence, maybe worry how others might judge you if they saw it... Many, many women have been raised this way; many, many men have not. The discrepancy doesn't stop in one generation, I'm afraid.

Sorry, but, though some men today are better than their fathers probably were about this, the research overwhelmingly says that women are STIIIIIIIIILL having to run things at home. Some estimates have it at ~80% of the domestic labour (when, both partners are working).

I do the vast majority of the housework in my home. Not because my SO is unable or unwilling to do it, but because I'm a it of a control freak and also like things a little neater than he does. He's content to run the vacuum once a week while I like to do it three or four times a week.

I wash dishes by hand every night and do 90% of the laundry. Yet, I find time to lounge in front of the TV, exercise, write and read along with a full-time job and a pretty active social life.

If women are doing 80% of the housework in their homes and they aren't happy about it, they need to discuss it with their SOs and change it. It really i sthat simple.

Don't make yourself a martyr and then ask for my sympathy.

LOL ok I'm also single at the moment, as it happens. This is not about me personally, at all. (and I'm no martyr btw)

One reason you might be a control freak about it, is you've been socialized to clean -- to notice dust, etc; to know what to do with it; to feel uncomfortable in its presence, maybe worry how others might judge you if they saw it... Many, many women have been raised this way; many, many men have not. The discrepancy doesn't stop in one generation, I'm afraid.

You clearly never set foot in my house growing up. My mother is the exact opposite. I grew up in chaos. Her best friend and her daughter (who is my best friend) and my father's sister whom I'm very close to and lived with for a while all live in chaos. They are not dirty people, but they aren't NEAT people, either. My mother always says my neat-freakiness is me rebelling against her.

I'm a Capricorn. That's why I clean so much. I need order in my life, whether it's a clean house or decorations just right. I need a very specific environment to function on any level. It isn't society. It's who I am. When i move to a new place, my boxes are unpacked and everything put away within the first week because I just can't stand things being cluttered. And if I asked my SO to do more, he would without argument. But I can't even stand how he stacks dishes in the dishrack. He doesn't do it "right" (i.e. MY way).

But thank you for the psycho-analysis of someone you don't know anything about. :flowerforyou:

i didn't psychoanalyze you, i said "one reason you MIGHT". because you are 1) a woman who 2) grew up in a society that does this to women, *generally*. that is sociological.

I helped with housework as a kid. I was definitely not trained to notice dust, dirt, or clutter in the process. Unfortunately, my husband does. He's the control freak about that, so he does the majority of the cleaning. I'm the control freak on nutrition, so I do the majority of the cooking. It's part of maintaining a household. I don't feel objectified when I'm doing either. I feel like I'm taking care of what's mine.

Sorry, but, though some men today are better than their fathers probably were about this, the research overwhelmingly says that women are STIIIIIIIIILL having to run things at home. Some estimates have it at ~80% of the domestic labour (when, both partners are working).

I do the vast majority of the housework in my home. Not because my SO is unable or unwilling to do it, but because I'm a it of a control freak and also like things a little neater than he does. He's content to run the vacuum once a week while I like to do it three or four times a week.

I wash dishes by hand every night and do 90% of the laundry. Yet, I find time to lounge in front of the TV, exercise, write and read along with a full-time job and a pretty active social life.

If women are doing 80% of the housework in their homes and they aren't happy about it, they need to discuss it with their SOs and change it. It really i sthat simple.

Don't make yourself a martyr and then ask for my sympathy.

LOL ok I'm also single at the moment, as it happens. This is not about me personally, at all. (and I'm no martyr btw)

One reason you might be a control freak about it, is you've been socialized to clean -- to notice dust, etc; to know what to do with it; to feel uncomfortable in its presence, maybe worry how others might judge you if they saw it... Many, many women have been raised this way; many, many men have not. The discrepancy doesn't stop in one generation, I'm afraid.

yeah maybe some people but this is not a legitimate barrier to being in great physical shape.

it's not backdated actually, some of these studies are from the past five years, in north america, with women who were reproductive aged in that time frame. i know everyone would like for this crap to be over but it's not

it's not backdated actually, some of these studies are from the past five years, in north america, with women who were reproductive aged in that time frame. i know everyone would like for this crap to be over but it's not

I don't doubt your figures. What I'm saying is that in a lot of cases women just aren't saying, "help me." And men -- whether it's society or biological differences in the brain -- don't generally (there are exceptions) feel as bothered by clutter as a a lot of women so they don't think to just spontaneously help out. HOWEVER, one thing you left out is that men bear the bigger burden of outdoor work around the house over women.

Men are more likely to be mowing lawns, taking out garbage, painting, doing home repairs, etc. So are women really doing more? It's far less strenuous to run a vacuum than mow a lawn with a push mower or paint a house.

While I do more housework than my SO, when my car breaks, he's the one out in the hot sun fixing it. Or his own or my daughter's (who isn't his child).

Sorry, but, though some men today are better than their fathers probably were about this, the research overwhelmingly says that women are STIIIIIIIIILL having to run things at home. Some estimates have it at ~80% of the domestic labour (when, both partners are working).

I do the vast majority of the housework in my home. Not because my SO is unable or unwilling to do it, but because I'm a it of a control freak and also like things a little neater than he does. He's content to run the vacuum once a week while I like to do it three or four times a week.

I wash dishes by hand every night and do 90% of the laundry. Yet, I find time to lounge in front of the TV, exercise, write and read along with a full-time job and a pretty active social life.

If women are doing 80% of the housework in their homes and they aren't happy about it, they need to discuss it with their SOs and change it. It really i sthat simple.

Don't make yourself a martyr and then ask for my sympathy.

LOL ok I'm also single at the moment, as it happens. This is not about me personally, at all. (and I'm no martyr btw)

One reason you might be a control freak about it, is you've been socialized to clean -- to notice dust, etc; to know what to do with it; to feel uncomfortable in its presence, maybe worry how others might judge you if they saw it... Many, many women have been raised this way; many, many men have not. The discrepancy doesn't stop in one generation, I'm afraid.

You clearly never set foot in my house growing up. My mother is the exact opposite. I grew up in chaos. Her best friend and her daughter (who is my best friend) and my father's sister whom I'm very close to and lived with for a while all live in chaos. They are not dirty people, but they aren't NEAT people, either. My mother always says my neat-freakiness is me rebelling against her.

I'm a Capricorn. That's why I clean so much. I need order in my life, whether it's a clean house or decorations just right. I need a very specific environment to function on any level. It isn't society. It's who I am. When i move to a new place, my boxes are unpacked and everything put away within the first week because I just can't stand things being cluttered. And if I asked my SO to do more, he would without argument. But I can't even stand how he stacks dishes in the dishrack. He doesn't do it "right" (i.e. MY way).

But thank you for the psycho-analysis of someone you don't know anything about. :flowerforyou:

i didn't psychoanalyze you, i said "one reason you MIGHT". because you are 1) a woman who 2) grew up in a society that does this to women, *generally*. that is sociological.

whether or not you grew up in a society that does this to women (re: cleanliness obligations) depends on how old you are, what country you were raised in, what generation your mother was part of, if you had both parents or just one and whether you had a stay at home mom or dad or if they both worked.

your sociology stuff is backdated and cant be handed out like that anymore.

We have unlimited options now and nothing is traditional or standard anymore. You cant make sweeping generalizations across the female half of the species.

You can tell us all about you and your situation and no one can say boo in disagreement. but what things were like for you were probably not the same way for women across the board anymore :flowerforyou:

it's not backdated actually, some of these studies are from the past five years, in north america, with women who were reproductive aged in that time frame. i know everyone would like for this crap to be over but it's not


The Persistence of the Gendered Division of Domestic Labour

Why has the gendered division of domestic labour proved so resistant to change despite the growth in married women’s labour force participation? We develop a game theoretic model of marriage to show that women’s individual levels of relative economic autonomy are not in themselves sufficient to bring about an aggregate shift in the division of domestic labour. Using data for 22 countries from the 1994 International Social Survey Programme, we show that what is required is that there be a greater proportion of economically autonomous women within the society as a whole, together with a sufficiently large proportion of men who, if faced with an economically autonomous woman, would rather participate in domestic tasks than endure marital breakdown. These results suggest that until we see greater gender material equality for the majority of women in a society and an evolution in men’s gender ideology, the gendered division of domestic labour will persist.

http://esr.oxfordjournals.org/content/21/1/43.abstract


Gender Convergence in Domestic Work: Discerning the Effects of Interactional and Institutional Barriers from Large-scale Data

Cross-national trends in paid and unpaid work time over the last 40 years reveal a slow and incomplete convergence of women’s and men’s work patterns. A simplistic extrapolation would indicate a 70—80 year process of gender convergence, with the year 2010 representing an approximate mid-point. However, in conformity with the expectations of gender theory, time use data show that gender segregation in domestic work is quite persistent over time. Women still do the bulk of routine housework and caring for family members while men have increased their contributions disproportionately to non-routine domestic work, suggesting that gender ideologies and the associated ‘doing’ of gender in interaction remain important features of the division of domestic labour. The effects of institutional barriers are also apparent, with differential changes in women’s proportional contribution to routine housework and caring activities related to different national policy clusters.

http://soc.sagepub.com/content/45/2/234.abstract

its also not the same. It may not be over - but we arent where we were in the beginning. we have made progress. i cant believe im still having to explain to women that not only have we indeed made progress, but that its okay to celebrate that. we dont have to end every freaking fudging sentence with a ....BUT WE'RE STILL ON THE SHT END OF THE STICK.

As individuals, we are not. As individuals, we are now free.

Free to exercise our butts off in tiny workout clothes in front of our kids and stand up to the naysayers and say oh yeah? what's your excuse for not being awesome, when we finally have the right to be.

Because it is a women who had kids the message is some form of shaming?