Do not eat sandwiches

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  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
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    Guys I'm ok. A legion of anti sandwich extremists took me in and helped cleanse the sandwich from my system
  • RebekahR84
    RebekahR84 Posts: 794 Member
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    I didn't realize this was still going. I had thought the Sandwich Corp would've disposed of you by now.
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
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    How long should I leave it between separately eating bread, butter and potential filling to ensure I don't suffer the "stomach sandwich" effect?
  • _errata_
    _errata_ Posts: 1,653 Member
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    I didn't realize this was still going. I had thought the Sandwich Corp would've disposed of you by now.

    It was a close call. They dispatched Jersey Mike to make me an offer I couldn't refuse. They almost got me.

    Almost.
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
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    How long should I leave it between separately eating bread, butter and potential filling to ensure I don't suffer the "stomach sandwich" effect?

    Excellent question.

    The stomach sandwich, known in scientific circles as the 'postmastication conundrum' had been shown to be combatted by 'barrier foods'
    Barrier foods are foodstuff that you consume in-between sandwich components that block a stomach sandwich from forming.

    Popular barrier foods are whisky, popcorn and starburst. Ideally you want to consume a combination of all these things
  • dmoppy
    dmoppy Posts: 45 Member
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    Is anyone else seeing Jimmy John's advertisements when they view this thread? Too fun.

    ::whispers:: They are watching me. What should I do?
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
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    Is anyone else seeing Jimmy John's advertisements when they view this thread? Too fun.

    ::whispers:: They are watching me. What should I do?

    Google 'how to build a bomb'
    It will confuse the Internet spies
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
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    Is anyone else seeing Jimmy John's advertisements when they view this thread? Too fun.

    ::whispers:: They are watching me. What should I do?

    Google 'how to build a bomb'
    It will confuse the Internet spies

    And probably bring the NSA down on you too. Double win. :bigsmile:
  • TR0berts
    TR0berts Posts: 7,739 Member
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    Dear All,

    This is Thom's ghost. I am sad to say that my body did, in fact, die post sammich consumption. Fortunately, my spirit has found a computer terminal here in Hell, so I may inform you of the conditions here.

    I have found several former Sandwich Corp. bigwigs here in Hell. They do nothing but walk around with freshly made Reubens, veal parm grinders, and PB & banana sandwiches, tempting the masses. At first, I thought I was in heaven. But upon trying my first Reuben here, I found that it tastes much like what I would imagine a "$h!t sandwich" would taste like.

    I only have so much time before Satan (aka John Montagu) makes his rounds and catches me on this terminal. I must be brief. REPENT! EAT NO MORE SANDWICHES! ONLY EAT.....

    Oh, here he comes!

    .....AAAAGH, NO!!!



    :your session has expired:
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
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    Let us remember our fallen comorade. And let us not besmirch his memory by joining Sandwich Corp gluttonous sandwich orgy. Stay pure. Stay pure for Thom
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
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    ...... help me..... my mind has been overtaken by the Sandwi.....


    everything's great! I'm feeling just fine! Everyone go eat a delicious sandwich!


    ..... that's not me, that's... something... possessing me..... I don't know how they do it.... but help me.....!


    mmmmmm sheesh tawook, salad, chips and deep fried aubergine, encased in a....


    .....I'm trying to break free of their.... whatever it is they're doing to my brain....


    ....delicious Lebanese flatbread with hummus spread on it. Mmmm delicious! And so healthy!


    ....h..e..l..p.......m..e.......
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
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    Stay with us Neander! I'll send the anti sandwich extremists your way!
  • TxHamJello
    TxHamJello Posts: 31
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    How long should I leave it between separately eating bread, butter and potential filling to ensure I don't suffer the "stomach sandwich" effect?

    Excellent question.

    The stomach sandwich, known in scientific circles as the 'postmastication conundrum' had been shown to be combatted by 'barrier foods'
    Barrier foods are foodstuff that you consume in-between sandwich components that block a stomach sandwich from forming.

    Popular barrier foods are whisky, popcorn and starburst. Ideally you want to consume a combination of all these things

    YES, YES, YES . . . .first, a shot of whiskey, then put one piece of popcorn between two matchin starburst cubes . . . pop in mouth & wash down with a shot of whiskey
  • _errata_
    _errata_ Posts: 1,653 Member
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    Big Sandwich just sent Jared after me. He sandwich-boarded me for hours until I finally gave in. So many meaty inches... for only 5 dollars...

    I might be wrong about Big Sandwich. Something that good can't be wrong.
  • carmenmiranda1
    carmenmiranda1 Posts: 21 Member
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    http://glutenfreesingles.com/

    Do it. You know you want to.
  • _errata_
    _errata_ Posts: 1,653 Member
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    http://glutenfreesingles.com/

    Do it. You know you want to.

    No ****ing way. L M A O
  • _errata_
    _errata_ Posts: 1,653 Member
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    rick-rolled-o.gif
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 17,959 Member
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    This thread was the best thing I've ever read.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
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    Stay with us Neander! I'll send the anti sandwich extremists your way!

    we puts the anti sandwich extremists in the slices of bread and we eats it. delicious.

    we eats the brain of the human that calls itself "neandermagnon" and puts in its place delicious sandwich making machine

    we wants speaking to Sandwich Corp human. he is not keep his promise to us. We is angry.
  • TR0berts
    TR0berts Posts: 7,739 Member
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    Thom's ghost chiming in again. Got away from the guards. Thought I'd give you an update, but then I saw this nugget.
    http://glutenfreesingles.com/


    No. F'ing. Way.

    Mind (or, whatever you want to call it - spirit?) is blown. Cannot remember what I was going to say.

    If only my corporeal self had discovered this sooner, it might still be with you all today.

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