Santa!?!?! I hate the lie!
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I believe Santa is alive in all of us and I define it as the joy you get from giving.
And being an only child coming from parents who aren't really kid people ... let your children be kids while they still can because soon enough life happens and responsibilities become the driving force in your life.0 -
Why not let them enjoy the fantasy? Its fun and exciting. I personally think parents opposed to the myth are being selfish because they aren't getting the credit for gift giving.
I don't care what it says on the tag. This is just a silly statement. Are birthdays less fun because there a no magical present giver?0 -
Tell him the truth. My mom did, and I learned to appreciate Christmas for the family time and spirit of generosity. I'm going to do the same for mine.
You can have both.0 -
Tell him. What is the worst that could happen?
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I enjoy it. I like seeing my 4 year old get excited about the magic of Christmas. She's got the rest of her life to grow up and realize how much life can suck. I like letting my kid be a kid.
^^^This, so much this! I guess if it's against your religious beliefs to perpetuate Santa, then don't. Otherwise let them have the magic of Christmas for the short while they can. My kids no longer believe and there was no awful breakdown and accusations of lying. They simply grew out of it. If anything I was the sad one, not them. I still believe in the magic, just not the man and I hope my kids do too.
Double This ^^^^^^^
It's a harmless bit of teaching the lesson of giving through the myth. They will figure out on their own as they get older long before you tell them it's not a real person, but is only a spirit of giving / concept. They have the rest of their lives to deal with harsh reality, let them live in a fantasy world for a few years.0 -
Ok, My thoughts are not popular, but we all have to choose how to raise our children, so here it goes. I feel exactly like you do. And I have no clue what your religious beliefs are, but for us, it is the time we celebrate our savior's birth. So, We were really torn! Then one day, our oldest just straight up asked us, like yours did, if he was real, we just decided we were not gonna lie about it. We are extremely blunt and honest people to begin with, and always talk with our kids about how we will always tell them the truth, no matter what.
I do feel like in the back of my mind, I always did remember feeling betrayed that my parents had lied to me about Santa. I am an extremely trusting person. If my parents told me something was true, then it was true, you know? So, we do not "do" Santa. I am actually buying a book at St. Nicholas to start reading to them at Christmas time. They know the story because we have told them, but St. Nicholas Day is Dec. 6th, I believe, and I would like to start incorporating that into our traditions. He was a real person and did wonderful things and showed compassion. Okay, ramble over.
If you are going to celebrate the birth of our saviour you should do it on the actual day he was born in march or april (I forget the exact date now)0 -
Because children love to believe in magic and that impossible things can happen to anyone. They deserve a time of limitless imagination before the world enters and pounds it out of them. A child's imagination is a terrible thing to crush.
My youngest daughter quit believing about aged 7 but didn't tell me til years later because she didn't want to hurt MY feelings. I think she got the message of sharing generosity because she was trying to keep the magic alive for me.0 -
i don't like people (mythical or otherwise) taking credit for gifts I buy. I know, I have the real spirit of christmas in me.0
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I still believe in Santa. Way to bring me down, man. Way to bring me down.0
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Why not let them enjoy the fantasy? Its fun and exciting. I personally think parents opposed to the myth are being selfish because they aren't getting the credit for gift giving.
I don't care what it says on the tag. This is just a silly statement. Are birthdays less fun because there a no magical present giver?0 -
You don't have to tell him "Santa isn't real", you can just say everyone has their own beliefs and in our family we celebrate by.......whatever it is you do. You can say it is a religious thing or whatever, but do not say "it is not real" to a 3 year old. as that would just invite the wrecking of santa for all young children associated with your child. It is a personal choice, just don't wreck it for others.0
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I still believe in Santa. Way to bring me down, man. Way to bring me down.
Hi CupcakeDammit!
Sorry for your loss.0 -
I appreciate the perspectives. I will let Santa play this year since I already for the story but will really have to think about next year and how to handle it.0
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Sometimes being a good parent means lying to them.
My kids still believe. I love that Christmas is magical to them. Believing in santa doesn't mean you don’t teach them the meaning of Christmas though.0 -
So my oldest is 3 and asked me about Santa and Christmas. I told him the basic crap that everyone spews and I hate myself for it! Wh does he need to believe in Santa just to have it crushed later in life? Why set them up for disappointment later in life. Am I a bad mom because I don't want to perpetuate this myth?
Thoughts please.
I actually know lots of parents who told their kids early on (from the get go). I figured it out when I saw my dad put a present under the tree I think I was maybe 4/5 (when I should have been sleeping) and then it said "From: Santa". I asked my mom and she just flat out told me. But she also told me that it wasn't nice to tell my friends, and that we should keep it between us. It never ruined anything for me.
It did however make me feel kinda bad for a friend of mine that was 11 and STILL believed. I remember her crying at school because other kids were laughing at her.0 -
Ok, My thoughts are not popular, but we all have to choose how to raise our children, so here it goes. I feel exactly like you do. And I have no clue what your religious beliefs are, but for us, it is the time we celebrate our savior's birth. So, We were really torn! Then one day, our oldest just straight up asked us, like yours did, if he was real, we just decided we were not gonna lie about it. We are extremely blunt and honest people to begin with, and always talk with our kids about how we will always tell them the truth, no matter what.
I do feel like in the back of my mind, I always did remember feeling betrayed that my parents had lied to me about Santa. I am an extremely trusting person. If my parents told me something was true, then it was true, you know? So, we do not "do" Santa. I am actually buying a book at St. Nicholas to start reading to them at Christmas time. They know the story because we have told them, but St. Nicholas Day is Dec. 6th, I believe, and I would like to start incorporating that into our traditions. He was a real person and did wonderful things and showed compassion. Okay, ramble over.
If you are going to celebrate the birth of our saviour you should do it on the actual day he was born in march or april (I forget the exact date now)0 -
We told our boys that Santa wasn't real but a game grow ups played with kids tomake the holidays more fun. It was tough when they were younger to not have them 'spill the beans' and ruin it for other kids, but I am so glad we went that route. Now that they are older, it is even more fun. Christmas has always been a wonderful holiday for us. They realize that generosity comes from actual people and is not magic.0
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Ok, My thoughts are not popular, but we all have to choose how to raise our children, so here it goes. I feel exactly like you do. And I have no clue what your religious beliefs are, but for us, it is the time we celebrate our savior's birth. So, We were really torn! Then one day, our oldest just straight up asked us, like yours did, if he was real, we just decided we were not gonna lie about it. We are extremely blunt and honest people to begin with, and always talk with our kids about how we will always tell them the truth, no matter what.
I do feel like in the back of my mind, I always did remember feeling betrayed that my parents had lied to me about Santa. I am an extremely trusting person. If my parents told me something was true, then it was true, you know? So, we do not "do" Santa. I am actually buying a book at St. Nicholas to start reading to them at Christmas time. They know the story because we have told them, but St. Nicholas Day is Dec. 6th, I believe, and I would like to start incorporating that into our traditions. He was a real person and did wonderful things and showed compassion. Okay, ramble over.0 -
Wait.... SANTA's NOT REAL!!!! :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad:0
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I wouldn't say your a bad mom. but it does seem you're insecure about your own abilities if you blindly follow everyone else even though it's not what you believe.
I do NOT do Santa with my boys, but unfortunately my husband does. I tell them I don't think Santa is real, but it's OK if they do. It's a teaching moment that I use to their advantage: Different people believe different things but that doesn't make them bad/weird/whatever.0
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