Santa!?!?! I hate the lie!

I was hoping this thread might give me more clarity on whether or not I tell my future kids about Santa. It has not.
I'm still torn. Personally I cannot stand what Christmas has become. I hate hearing about all the drama between people who celebrate and people who don't. I hate that so many people just have turned it into a meaningless retail free for all.
I think the whole Santa thing, for me, is that there are thousands of good boys and girl out there who believe in Santa, but their parents are too poor to buy them presents, and then the kids think they weren't good enough. That part of it just makes me feel so sad. I wish that there was a stronger focus on being with your family and friends, and just loving each other and enjoying their company, less focus on buy buy buy.
Well, good luck everyone! Do what you feel is right for you and your family and I'm sure your kids will grow up OK regardless.

So my oldest is 3 and asked me about Santa and Christmas. I told him the basic crap that everyone spews and I hate myself for it! Wh does he need to believe in Santa just to have it crushed later in life? Why set them up for disappointment later in life. Am I a bad mom because I don't want to perpetuate this myth?

Thoughts please.

We never lied to our kids about it. In our house, Santa Claus was no different than Spiderman or Superman. He's a fun character and we can watch movies or read books about him, but he's just a fictional character. I don't believe in lying to kids.

Lie, pretend, tradition, we're doing it. I love bringing a little magic into our home. My little is really into fairies. We made a fairy garden so that any fairies in the area would have a place to hang out. Sometimes they leave things in the garden for little. Sometimes they leave little notes asking for her to give them things they need. Seeing the joy and wonder on her face when we talk about Santa, or tend to her garden...well, it completely wipes away any doubts I might have about "lying" to her. I wasn't crushed when I found out about Santa and I don't hate my parents for it. Whether it's Santa, or fairies, or dragons, whatever, I LOVE seeing parents pretending with their kids and bringing some magic into their lives. I think my little will have fond memories of this stuff when she's older. If it screws her up, she can get a good therapist to talk to about it.

Said fairy garden:

i cant see it and i reallly really want to:flowerforyou:

Sometimes being a good parent means lying to them.

My kids still believe. I love that Christmas is magical to them. Believing in santa doesn't mean you don’t teach them the meaning of Christmas though.

I will never agree with that!

You don't have to.

When I lost a pregnancy we didn't give the whole truth. When grandma died a horrible death from cancer, I said she went peacefully. When my nephew died at 4mo we made up some bs answer as to why.

I do this from time to time with non sad stuff too. Like when I eat their ice cream, I blame their dad.

Sometimes I tell them lies. I'm okay with it.

ETA: 4 kids. 10, 8, 3, 2 and I'm 33.

Tell him the truth. My mom did, and I learned to appreciate Christmas for the family time and spirit of generosity. I'm going to do the same for mine.

So true! My kids understand and appreciate Christmas, whereas the ones that get told the Santa lie, end up believing that Christmas is all about presents.

I let my son believe in Santa, but I've modified the story a bit so he doesn't come upon that disappointment. The big (good) presents under the tree come from Daddy because Daddy loves him. Santa doesn't love him like Daddy does, Santa just rewards you if you're good. So he brings little toys if he's nice all year (i.e. throw unwrapped Dollar General crap he really won't ever play with under the tree), but it still shows up magically on Christmas. He gets that awe about the magic, but doesn't ever get hyped about Santa during Christmas and shouldn't be disappointed when he finds he's not real.

Santa's not real?

Seriously...santa helps teach children about unconditional giving, and that's a good life lesson.

What a crock!

Educative,, I love it. Was thinking the same thing myself. But believing in Santa Claus is sacrilege if you are Christian. Just food for thought (the no calorie kind).