Is chivalry really dead? :(

Guy opens door for woman A: "Thanks, very nice of you."

Guy opens door for woman B (who has a similar appearance and fashion sense to woman A): "What, you don't think a woman can open a door? Sexist creep!"

Guess carefully.

Laugh at and ignore woman B. She's miserable. Woman A appreciates you.

I'm not sure how that would fit into the whole "being chivalrous" concept. Perhaps I missed the part in the Code of Chivalry about laughing at people with different notions of it than my own.

Guy opens door for woman A: "Thanks, very nice of you."

Guy opens door for woman B (who has a similar appearance and fashion sense to woman A): "What, you don't think a woman can open a door? Sexist creep!"

Guess carefully.

Laugh at and ignore woman B. She's miserable. Woman A appreciates you.

I'm not sure how that would fit into the whole "being chivalrous" concept. Perhaps I missed the part in the Code of Chivalry about laughing at people with different notions of it than my own.

Well, people who are rude deserve it. Woman B is rude.

I've never been called out for being too chivalrous. I always hold doors and say "please, thanks you, etc" (I do think standing when a woman enters the room is too much).

The reason women might call you out for being over-chivalrous is become you come off as being incredibly beta. That is the worst thing a man can do.

I guess I fail to see the conflict between chivalry and equality.

Chivalry is a way of treating people...

Equality is allowing people an equal opportunity for achievement.

Men who hold back chivalry in the name of equality do so out of holding a grudge, or because they don't like showing respect to women in the first place.

But that's just my opinion.

I think you hit the nail on the head. I can be a strong, successful woman and still LOVE to be treated like a lady…I'm trying to teach my 14 yr old son to be a good man, and that includes chivalry...

Chivalry:
1. The medieval system, principles, and customs of knighthood.
2. a. The qualities idealized by knighthood, such as bravery, courtesy, honor, and gallantry toward women.
b. A manifestation of any of these qualities.
3. A group of knights or gallant gentlemen.

These traditional qualities are lacking in today's society. Chivalry is not about opening doors for women, it's about respect and honour. Knights swore to protect those who could not protect themselves. It just happened that at the time only men could be knights, so it has become a male ideal. However, today I think everyone can and should be chivalrous.

Guy opens door for woman A: "Thanks, very nice of you."

Guy opens door for woman B (who has a similar appearance and fashion sense to woman A): "What, you don't think a woman can open a door? Sexist creep!"

Guess carefully.

I can't comprehend a woman getting uptight about a man opening the door for them....it just astounds me. I've seen it mentioned quite a few times here and in other threads so it must be true...but seriously it just leaves me shaking my head that some women get offended when a person opens the door for them.

I've told my 24 year old daughter to hold out for the guy that will treat her like a princess. It seems they are harder to find with each passing generation. I've recently started dating someone who treats me like one, and it's been a learning curve for me as I am a rather independant, self-sufficient woman. He opens doors, puts my coat on for me, carried my packages while we were Christmas shopping...etc. Now I will say that if I come up with an idea for something for us to do for a date, or ask him out then I prefer to pay--only because I'm not going to ask him to do something and then expect him to pay.

To the men on this thread who posted why they practice chivalry---thank you!! It's given me a clearer understanding as to why the man I'm now dating believes and practices chivalry. Yes I've dated guys who have opened doors for me...but to date someone who practices chivalry completely is new to me.

I don't think it's a matter of equality. I think it's the man treating the woman like a princess, and the woman treating the man like he's a prince. It's making each other feel wanted and valued...to mutually do things for each other out of respect for one another.

I can't comprehend a woman getting uptight about a man opening the door for them....it just astounds me. I've seen it mentioned quite a few times here and in other threads so it must be true...but seriously it just leaves me shaking my head that some women get offended when a person opens the door for them.

I took feminist theory in college. The explanation for this (ridiculous) anger is that it began when women wore hoop skirts and couldn't physically reach doors o open them for themselves because of their clothing. So it's seen in modern times as men saying that women are incapable of opening doors for themselves.

A bit of a reach, but that's the explanation for those who are wondering (as I always did).

This is *just* my opinion, but I feel pretty strongly about it. Chivalry is mostly alive and well, and thank goodness for that. Women would be in a mess of trouble if it ever "went out of style".

Chivalry, at its core, is based on women being the weaker sex; and hate me if you want, but women *are* the (physically) weaker sex. If you've ever looked at the numbers put up by males and females in the same weight class at a powerlifting competition, there are HUGE disparities. There are exceptions to every rule, but genetically speaking, a man and a woman of equal weight are not equal in strength. Any woman that thinks she is equal in strength to her male counterpart is, statistically, incorrect.

Chivalry teaches men to be careful with women, to treat them with respect, gentleness and, above all else, to protect them and keep them from harm. Men should know that they are stronger than women, to discourage this and pretend it doesn't exist is to do both men and women a disservice.

I love that women are empowered, and they should be equal. Equality is defined as the state of being equal, especially in status, rights and opportunities. There is no reason that women should not be held equal in these areas because of a disparity in physical strength. But open your eyes. The ability to feel empowered is a result of society, and it is because of chivalry. Look at places where chivalry is not a concept and you will see women being treated as chattel, being bought and sold and traded as a commodity, being abused and treated as slaves - what you see is nature. Nature is beautiful, but also ugly - and the truth of nature is that the strong prey on the weak. In societies where it isn't ingrained in men that women are to be treated gently, protected, guarded, treated with immense respect and allowed to flourish and be equals, you see subservient women.

I would be horrified if I ever heard a woman snap at a man for opening a door for her or offering to help her carry something heavy. Yes, you can open your own door, and you are almost positively able to carry that package on your own, but every time a man offers, he is showing you that he's on board. That he's invested in protecting women, that he respects you, that he's there if you ever need him. Next time, it may not be a package or a door, next time it may be someone stronger than you trying to do you harm, and that chivalrous door-opener might be the only thing standing in the way of you and physical harm.

So to every man that's ever held the door open for me, offered to carry my books for me, pulled over to offer me assistance with changing a tire, or the hundreds of other times you've extended yourself to help me - Thank you. Thank you for letting me know that you respect me, that you see me, and that you're there for me. Thank you for watching over me. May you be blessed by whatever power you believe in.