Is chivalry really dead? :(

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Replies

  • Tropical_Turtle
    Tropical_Turtle Posts: 2,236 Member
    I guess I fail to see the conflict between chivalry and equality.

    Chivalry is a way of treating people...

    Equality is allowing people an equal opportunity for achievement.

    Men who hold back chivalry in the name of equality do so out of holding a grudge, or because they don't like showing respect to women in the first place.

    But that's just my opinion.

    You are A OK in my book!
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    I need cat gifs to make me feel better now.
    36a6vi.jpg

    HA!
  • Bobbie8786
    Bobbie8786 Posts: 202 Member
    Here is the real question, if you were on a sinking ship would you want chivalry to be dead or alive ladies? If you have been arguing that chivalry is a misogynistic ideal, then I am guessing you would want an equitable way of deciding who drowns and who gets in the lifeboat that has nothing to do with gender.


    Actually that's a hypothetical question. Seeing as you're so fond of hypotheticals, let me pose one to you; If it came down to your son or husband or an old lady getting in that lifeboat would you want chivalry to be alive?

    Pardon me, hypothetical question, my bad. I hardly ever post, so I don't know where you come off saying I am so fond of them, but I have seen many of your other posts, so I guess I get the snark.

    I don't have an answer, no one does, as you so graciously pointed out, it is a hypothetical and any answer is the same. However, I believe I would never get on a lifeboat if my son or husband did not. However, I have the luxury of saying that because I don't have young children at home who need me. I think I would prefer young families survived but that is me hoping I have some level of honor that I would live up to in that situation.
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    You find what you're looking for. People looking for the bad in others will always find it. I read terrible things on the Internet all the time, but in real life, most of the behaviors I observe are decent and sociable. I think I tend to focus on the positive, so maybe that's why...Also, I don't hang out with toxic people so there's not a lot of drama in my life anyway. :flowerforyou:
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    I would throw most of you overboard and save myself.

    Finally! An honest answer.

    Yup. I intend to live on in that circumstance.

    However, I do not believe that I would throw a child overboard to save myself.
  • andreahanlon
    andreahanlon Posts: 263 Member
    In my experience, no ... I know plenty of men who cherish their woman and let her know it through chivalrous acts!
  • FlaxMilk
    FlaxMilk Posts: 3,452 Member

    *looks up, makes eye contact, keeps sitting*

    Well, I don't want to make you uncomfortable.

    You're welcome.

    Thanks!

    I don't mind standing on the bus, I do mind feeling like someone sacrificed their comfort just for me (all other things being equal. If I'm 8 months pregnant, everyone 7 months in and earlier better offer up their seats.)
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    If we are on a bus and a woman is standing, he gets up and gives her his seat. He isn't a misogynist, it was just the way he was raised.

    I am sure he isn't. I don't think most chivalrous men are at all misogynist. It is mostly about how someone is raised. Some of the ideas of chivalry grew out of old rules that don't apply anymore. I give my seat on the bus to people who look like the need it more than me, and I would feel very uncomfortable if a man gave me his seat. I'd feel guilty.

    *looks up, makes eye contact, keeps sitting*

    Well, I don't want to make you uncomfortable.

    You're welcome.

    I'd be fine with that.

    As long as you smiled and said "hi" when you made eye contact because that's polite.
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    Cat that would survive sinking ship:
    Waterskiing%2Bkittem%2Bsource%2Bon%2Btumblr%2Bpaigewtf.gif
  • FlaxMilk
    FlaxMilk Posts: 3,452 Member


    Yup. I intend to live on in that circumstance.

    However, I do not believe that I would throw a child overboard to save myself.

    Sometimes people mistake me for a child. Safe!

    For me, it would depend on circumstances. Impossible to know what I'd do. If it were me and all of my friends' kids, I'd save the kids. If it were me and some stranger, they'd probably toss me overboard anyway. I never win in a battle of physical prowess.
  • _errata_
    _errata_ Posts: 1,653 Member
    I just want somebody to buy me some tacos, ok?

    QFT.
  • JingleMuffin
    JingleMuffin Posts: 543 Member
    I dont think so. My husband opens the car door for me ll the time. carries in all the groceries for me so i dont have to. opens doors for me going into places and parks the car, also goes out and gets the car when its cold and he picks me up. He also starts my car on cold mornings and gets all the ice off. he dosent even have to impress me. we're married lol. Likewise i do all kinds of tings for him and I've seen him hold the door for people going into a public place. I do the same. Maybe its just Minnesota Niceness. Hard to say but i like.
  • _errata_
    _errata_ Posts: 1,653 Member
    One can only hope.

    I guess people think they deserve a pat on the back for behaving politely to women, it can't just be expected. sure, the "good old days" are gone.... I agree... one can only hope that they are gone...

    My point precisely. The idea of chivalry was romanticized in the 1800s when people were revolting against the industrial revolution. Chivalry, like I said earlier, was a code of conduct created by priests to prevent knights from killing each other in times of peace. There was nothing chivalrous about knights.

    Enter the Ivanhoe in the 1800s and people have been stupefied ever since. Woman can actually vote now. That's called progress. It ain't perfect but anyone who thinks females fared better in the past are moronic at best.
  • No. But if women expect it they better not be caddy (sp) *****es in return. I think it should be equal with no double-standards. If a woman went out of her way and the man didn't act appreciative the woman would blow it out of proportion.
  • FlaxMilk
    FlaxMilk Posts: 3,452 Member
    BTW, googling "Rose door Titanic" under "images" shows that this debate is alive and well. :laugh:
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    "Draw me like one of your French girls. Except, you know, one that would share the door."
  • keef1972
    keef1972 Posts: 411 Member
    No......it's not really needed as many girls will "give it up", with not much effort....
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    No......it's not really needed as many girls will "give it up", with not much effort....

    Oh this looks fun. Chivalry is for getting women to have sex with you?
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    No......it's not really needed as many girls will "give it up", with not much effort....

    Oh this looks fun. Chivalry is for getting women to have sex with you?

    Oh my...

    Insert "eating popcorn gif" here.
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    No......it's not really needed as many girls will "give it up", with not much effort....

    Lol. If you're nice to a girl just to get laid, you're a DB.
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    No......it's not really needed as many girls will "give it up", with not much effort....

    Lol. If you're nice to a girl just to get laid, you're a DB.

    Hence my "some guys are phony" comment.
  • KayNowayJose
    KayNowayJose Posts: 138 Member
    I guess I fail to see the conflict between chivalry and equality.

    Chivalry is a way of treating people...

    Equality is allowing people an equal opportunity for achievement.

    Men who hold back chivalry in the name of equality do so out of holding a grudge, or because they don't like showing respect to women in the first place.

    But that's just my opinion.

    Good point.

    I don't believe it's dead. I think if a woman appreciates it and if both parties are actually open to it then it works, otherwise not . But some people don't want anything to do with it. Hate to say it, but I also think some people don't have enough respect for themselves for any of it anymore. To expect it/ to dish it...its all about wham, bam, out the door and onto the next.
  • She_Hulk
    She_Hulk Posts: 277
    I truly hope not... This is what separates the boys from the men.


    ^^^^THIS!!! SO THIS!!!^^^^
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    I truly hope not... This is what separates the boys from the men.


    ^^^^THIS!!! SO THIS!!!^^^^

    That is also an androgynistic comment.
  • FatHuMan1
    FatHuMan1 Posts: 1,028 Member
    I truly hope not... This is what separates the boys from the men.


    ^^^^THIS!!! SO THIS!!!^^^^


    And the girls from the women.
  • leftyjace
    leftyjace Posts: 304 Member
    No......it's not really needed as many girls will "give it up", with not much effort....
    Points for honestly.

    And... well, that's about it.
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    No......it's not really needed as many girls will "give it up", with not much effort....
    Points for honestly.

    And... well, that's about it.

    Handing over $25 isn't much effort.
  • Bobbie8786
    Bobbie8786 Posts: 202 Member
    One can only hope.

    I guess people think they deserve a pat on the back for behaving politely to women, it can't just be expected. sure, the "good old days" are gone.... I agree... one can only hope that they are gone...

    My point precisely. The idea of chivalry was romanticized in the 1800s when people were revolting against the industrial revolution. Chivalry, like I said earlier, was a code of conduct created by priests to prevent knights from killing each other in times of peace. There was nothing chivalrous about knights.

    Enter the Ivanhoe in the 1800s and people have been stupefied ever since. Woman can actually vote now. That's called progress. It ain't perfect but anyone who thinks females fared better in the past are moronic at best.

    Did anyone say that "women fared better in the past?" I don't recall any single person making that particular argument. It would be moronic if any one had in fact made that statement. I had a high school history teacher who said the worst mistake men ever made was giving women the right to vote. I also had a guidance counselor who told me it was okay that I wasn't good at math and to just take typing classes instead. So I don't feel I need a lecture on women's rights and their advancement in the last few decades. Thinking "chivalrous" behavior is of some value is not the same as saying women should be weak, sweet, little, demure creatures who depend on a man for their very survival.
  • delicious_cocktail
    delicious_cocktail Posts: 5,797 Member
    I truly hope not... This is what separates the boys from the men.


    ^^^^THIS!!! SO THIS!!!^^^^

    That is also an androgynistic comment.

    misandryst. Men don't have Gyns.