My Boyfriend thinks I'm Fat

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  • Nutella91
    Nutella91 Posts: 624 Member
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    are you trolling? you do know how to find a BMI calculator, right?

    i don't think she is! guys tend to do this to make a girl feel insecure and make her think that he is better than her somehow.
  • AllAboutMrsV
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    SMH, hi there I am new to here, but so excited to get started. I have to agree with the lady that replied to this before me. If he is doing that with you and already, you are better off calling it quits with him. He is projecting his insecurities about something about himself, onto you. That is wrong and unhealthy, not only physically, but emotionally. My husband has seen me through some tough ups and downs, and has been awesome at being able to tell me that I can "afford" to make some changes, but he loves me and my body either way. And he is a fireman that would typically go for a much more slender type, more like I was when I first met him.
    This guy isn't worth your time, or the headache of trying to please him, 140/145 is awesome, and you are taller than me! Cut the fat=the insecure and downing boyfriend, and you will feel much better both physically and emotionally. Which will also allow the right man the opportunity to step in.
  • missiontofitness
    missiontofitness Posts: 4,074 Member
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    Well, this post is over a year old, but I'll say this:

    If anyone ever encounters a S/O like this, all you need to say is "I've actually just found a really great weight loss trick. I think it will help me lose weight fast."

    "Oh really?"

    "Yeah, I actually just lost 150lbs. Don't ever text/call me again. Bye!"
  • Aud0529
    Aud0529 Posts: 3
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    Hun im just going to be honest....What man doesn't want that??? I am in the same boat...However again, I agree with him. I am not upset or hurt or feel insecure in any way...I simply agree that I have been at a better point and that I CAN get there. The way I see it....he works 17 hour days for our family, and so I can sit with my child and do whatever I want to and just focus on school and life, and the least I can do for him is be the girl of his dreams, I like that actually. I want to know my man is looking at me mainly (since we all know men will look elsewhere...pigs or not they are men ) so id rather be the one he is worried about :) anyways......I am doing it for me, him, and my daughter so she can make better eating choices for herself. Also.... as far as working out hun u can ALWAYS make time. I work part time, go to school fulltime, and I have a 10 month old, and I still work out twice a day. Its tough but so worth it in the end. I m eating only veggies and fruits and protein in chicken and tuna. and so on. Im not giving up. So again if u feel he is wrong then do what u want with it but some men just don't know how to word it right. There Is no way to word that right really. I would do the same to him if he was getting out of a shape a lil. Simply put :) hope this helps even just a little :)
  • kershaann
    kershaann Posts: 1,824 Member
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    Oh honey a ture man would not call you fat. I had an ex boyfriend say that to me once, and that is what he became, an ex. I have never been skinny even being 5'5" my lowest weight has been 164lbs. Right now in my picture I am sitting at 170lbs. And if a man is going to call you names because of a number on a scale, then he is not worth the hassle.
  • Domineer
    Domineer Posts: 239 Member
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    My boyfriend thinks I am out of shape and chubby. I am 5'6" and weigh 140 pounds. At 145, he thinks I'm fat, and he can deal with it when I'm 135. Oh the things we do for love...

    Is this ok? I'm not sure whether to be upset about or agree with him. Its true i'm not at my most idea weight, but I eat healthy, do yoga all the time, and do the best I can with exercise for having a job that requires me to be sitting 9 hours a day.

    I used to be good with how I looked, but he really likes skinny girls and makes me feel like "I look good" is not as adequate as "I look like a sport's illustrated model."

    You definitely need to can that guy. 140 is a great weight for 5'6.
  • PawPrints89
    PawPrints89 Posts: 16 Member
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    I am 280lbs and started dating my boyfriend when I was about 230lbs. He has never once told me I'm fat. Although he encourages me to lose weight, it is purely for health reasons and something I want as well. You are at a normal, healthy weight. Whether you want to be more fit or not, is up to you. Nobody has the right to make you feel bad about the way you look. If he is only with you for the way you look, he is not worth keeping. That is not a healthy relationship.
  • HappinessFreedomForever
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    Dump his loser *kitten*!
  • tawanarencher
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    Sweetie, what really matters is how YOU feel about you. Of course you want to be aesthetically pleasing to his eye, but not at the cost of feeling inadequate. 10 pounds is nothing especially if you are doing what you can to stay in shape. The choice is yours. If you love you-don't let anyone steal that joy from you ;-)
  • CharleePear
    CharleePear Posts: 1,948 Member
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    My boyfriend thinks I am out of shape and chubby. I am 5'6" and weigh 140 pounds. At 145, he thinks I'm fat, and he can deal with it when I'm 135. Oh the things we do for love...

    Is this ok? I'm not sure whether to be upset about or agree with him. Its true i'm not at my most idea weight, but I eat healthy, do yoga all the time, and do the best I can with exercise for having a job that requires me to be sitting 9 hours a day.

    I used to be good with how I looked, but he really likes skinny girls and makes me feel like "I look good" is not as adequate as "I look like a sport's illustrated model."

    My husband has very similar standards to your boyfriend. When people suggest you might be a 'troll', they think this might be a joke post, because to them, the figures just don't add up: how could someone call YOU fat at THAT weight?

    Sadly, my DH (darling husband) did. Not only that, but he prodded the 'fat' bits until I cried. So I tried to lose weight for him: I lost it, and when he was still nasty to me, I gained it all back.

    His behaviour was awful, but I'm glad I never considered leaving him over it. Instead, I read Fat is a Feminist Issue and lost the weight for myself.

    And he didn't need to see the scales for me to know what weights he found me fat at. Once he said 'You WERE a bit podgy at Christmas,' when I'd been 60kg (132lb), which I blew up at him over, but if I get below about 120lb, he worries I'm too thin, so my window of attractiveness is rather narrow for him.

    The good thing is, I know I'm attractive to others when I'm not to him, so it has little effect on my overall self-esteem, but is not good for our relationship.
    wow...I actually was not going to post to this post again but after reading this it literally makes me nauseous and makes me want to throw up. I could not live with someone like that. It physically makes me ill just just reading this.

    No seriously I keep thinking about it and want to puke.

    I really don't even know what to say except that this makes me sick. I don't actually know what is worse...that he does this to you or that you are ok with it. But hey it is all ok though because you read a book.

    Agreed about the puking! I was married to someone that did that to me. It's not love. Why would you stay with someone who doesn't know how to love properly?
  • mineboy
    mineboy Posts: 2,478 Member
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    How fat is your Boy friend.... maybe he needs to lose weight or move his *kitten*/butt:flowerforyou:
  • Graelwyn75
    Graelwyn75 Posts: 4,404 Member
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    Do you guys even check the date of the original post?
    This dates to a year or so ago...and the original poster is most likely long gone.