Is it okay to "flaunt"?

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Replies

  • DSTMT
    DSTMT Posts: 417 Member
    Listen to Dr. Laura Schlessinger on Sirius Satellite Radio Starz Channel 106. It requires a subscription fee but it's worth it.

    Or for a one time fee she could get a lobotomy and achieve the same result.

    LOL my thoughts exactly, worst advice ever! Whatever "Dr Laura" says, do the exact opposite lol.
  • DSTMT
    DSTMT Posts: 417 Member
    Honor and obey. Did we all forget our marriage vows? If my hubby says no to something I'm wearing because it bothers him, I'll go change into something less sexy. If you love your SO, you shouldn't be flaunting to other guys, plain and simple.

    "Obey" wasn't actually in my vows, we left that one out since women aren't property anymore.
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    Honor and obey. Did we all forget our marriage vows? If my hubby says no to something I'm wearing because it bothers him, I'll go change into something less sexy. If you love your SO, you shouldn't be flaunting to other guys, plain and simple.

    "Obey" wasn't actually in my vows, we left that one out since women aren't property anymore.

    It wasn't in my vows because my husband knows I run things.


    ...that's not actually true. We have a partnership where we both contribute and excel in different areas and, as such, no one needs to 'obey' the other.
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    Honor and obey. Did we all forget our marriage vows? If my hubby says no to something I'm wearing because it bothers him, I'll go change into something less sexy. If you love your SO, you shouldn't be flaunting to other guys, plain and simple.

    "Obey" wasn't actually in my vows, we left that one out since women aren't property anymore.

    It wasn't in my vows because my husband knows I run things.


    ...that's not actually true. We have a partnership where we both contribute and excel in different areas and, as such, no one needs to 'obey' the other.

    Not in mine either.
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    Honor and obey. Did we all forget our marriage vows? If my hubby says no to something I'm wearing because it bothers him, I'll go change into something less sexy. If you love your SO, you shouldn't be flaunting to other guys, plain and simple.

    "Obey" wasn't actually in my vows, we left that one out since women aren't property anymore.

    It wasn't in my vows because my husband knows I run things.


    ...that's not actually true. We have a partnership where we both contribute and excel in different areas and, as such, no one needs to 'obey' the other.

    Seriously! The only time I "obey" him is when he has the whip out. :smokin:
  • Losing75byDecember
    Losing75byDecember Posts: 104 Member
    Honor and obey. Did we all forget our marriage vows? If my hubby says no to something I'm wearing because it bothers him, I'll go change into something less sexy. If you love your SO, you shouldn't be flaunting to other guys, plain and simple.

    "Obey" wasn't actually in my vows, we left that one out since women aren't property anymore.

    It wasn't in my vows because my husband knows I run things.


    ...that's not actually true. We have a partnership where we both contribute and excel in different areas and, as such, no one needs to 'obey' the other.

    Seriously! The only time I "obey" him is when he has the whip out. :smokin:

    Well, it's about damn time someone finally caught on to what I was getting at. He is my Master and he owns me. I am his to do as he pleases.
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    Honor and obey. Did we all forget our marriage vows? If my hubby says no to something I'm wearing because it bothers him, I'll go change into something less sexy. If you love your SO, you shouldn't be flaunting to other guys, plain and simple.

    "Obey" wasn't actually in my vows, we left that one out since women aren't property anymore.

    It wasn't in my vows because my husband knows I run things.


    ...that's not actually true. We have a partnership where we both contribute and excel in different areas and, as such, no one needs to 'obey' the other.

    Seriously! The only time I "obey" him is when he has the whip out. :smokin:

    Well, it's about damn time someone finally caught on to what I was getting at. He is my Master and he owns me. I am his to do as he pleases.


    Well now you have my full attention.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    Anyway... My profile photo is now one of the outfit in question...

    13870370315_afc9dd748f_o.jpgImagePlease

    Looks fine. In fact, it is a bit conservative for what I thought it was going to be in your initial description.

    I lived through the 60's and early 70's where your outfit would have been nearly deemed to be worn only by a prude. ;-)

    Perhaps we all worry too much....

    OP, I can't understand how anyone would think this outfit was inappropriate and flaunting or not age appropriate for a BBQ on a warm day. It's just a pair of shorts with a loose fitting top.

    And, For the record, from the OP, I never pictured anything outrageous. I just thought a pair of shorts, with a loose top that did not go all the way to the shorts. Normal warm day BBQ clothing. But, this outfit is even more covering than what I pictured.

    Also, want to add that I don't like when pockets are hanging out below a pair of shorts. It's ok in photography, but not real life. I like a lot of the photos that people have posted.

    Also there was no obeying in my marriage vows.

    And I like Alan Rickman.

    Also, noticed some people criticizing the OP's weight. That's not cool.

    I probably missed a bunch.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    Holy moly there's some catty people in here. I am incredibly grateful to live in a society where "appropriate" dress is for job interviews and funerals only, and the rest of the time everyone wears what they want no matter what age or weight.

    As for age appropriate OP you are only 29 this is young. One day you will be 80. Are you going to look back to this time with a grin because you wore what you wanted and looked smoking, or with regret because you hid your body in case strangers judged you?

    Oh, she's only 29. Wow, people! Stop telling the gal to be an old lady! Maybe I should start wearing a shall, orthotic shoes and a bun.

    I wore midriffs at 29 and never thought twice about it. I don't now because, like I said, 41. Short shorts? Absolutely. I worked very hard for my legs, and they look perfectly appropriate on me. People are projecting their own insecurities all over the place. Women my age wear shorts here. Most of them wear shorts that are between 3 and 5 inch inseam. Obviously, most of us aren't wearing the butt hugging ones that you buy in the Junior's department, but they're still short. 29 is a tricky age because it's too young to start dressing in tablecloth fabrics, and it's deemed too old to dress in Juniors.

    There are some things that I can only get a good fit if it is juniors. I'm probably going to be shopping in stores like Forever 21 until I'm 60.
  • DSTMT
    DSTMT Posts: 417 Member
    Honor and obey. Did we all forget our marriage vows? If my hubby says no to something I'm wearing because it bothers him, I'll go change into something less sexy. If you love your SO, you shouldn't be flaunting to other guys, plain and simple.

    "Obey" wasn't actually in my vows, we left that one out since women aren't property anymore.

    It wasn't in my vows because my husband knows I run things.


    ...that's not actually true. We have a partnership where we both contribute and excel in different areas and, as such, no one needs to 'obey' the other.

    Seriously! The only time I "obey" him is when he has the whip out. :smokin:

    Well, it's about damn time someone finally caught on to what I was getting at. He is my Master and he owns me. I am his to do as he pleases.


    Well now you have my full attention.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    Honor and obey. Did we all forget our marriage vows? If my hubby says no to something I'm wearing because it bothers him, I'll go change into something less sexy. If you love your SO, you shouldn't be flaunting to other guys, plain and simple.

    "Obey" wasn't actually in my vows, we left that one out since women aren't property anymore.

    It wasn't in my vows because my husband knows I run things.


    ...that's not actually true. We have a partnership where we both contribute and excel in different areas and, as such, no one needs to 'obey' the other.

    Seriously! The only time I "obey" him is when he has the whip out. :smokin:

    Well, it's about damn time someone finally caught on to what I was getting at. He is my Master and he owns me. I am his to do as he pleases.

    Things are starting to make a lot of sense now.
  • LetsTryThisAgain54
    LetsTryThisAgain54 Posts: 381 Member
    Honor and obey. Did we all forget our marriage vows? If my hubby says no to something I'm wearing because it bothers him, I'll go change into something less sexy. If you love your SO, you shouldn't be flaunting to other guys, plain and simple.

    "Obey" wasn't actually in my vows, we left that one out since women aren't property anymore.

    It wasn't in my vows because my husband knows I run things.


    ...that's not actually true. We have a partnership where we both contribute and excel in different areas and, as such, no one needs to 'obey' the other.

    Seriously! The only time I "obey" him is when he has the whip out. :smokin:

    Well, it's about damn time someone finally caught on to what I was getting at. He is my Master and he owns me. I am his to do as he pleases.

    Things are starting to make a lot of sense now.

    I had a feeling after reading her replies.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    Honor and obey. Did we all forget our marriage vows? If my hubby says no to something I'm wearing because it bothers him, I'll go change into something less sexy. If you love your SO, you shouldn't be flaunting to other guys, plain and simple.

    "Obey" wasn't actually in my vows, we left that one out since women aren't property anymore.

    It wasn't in my vows because my husband knows I run things.


    ...that's not actually true. We have a partnership where we both contribute and excel in different areas and, as such, no one needs to 'obey' the other.

    Seriously! The only time I "obey" him is when he has the whip out. :smokin:

    Well, it's about damn time someone finally caught on to what I was getting at. He is my Master and he owns me. I am his to do as he pleases.

    Things are starting to make a lot of sense now.

    I had a feeling after reading her replies.

    I mean in reference to backstory too, have you seen her older posts?
  • thegruz
    thegruz Posts: 1
    *oops, wrong, sorry*
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    *oops, wrong, sorry*

    Strong first post.

    (always wanted to say that).
  • egrusy
    egrusy Posts: 196 Member
    Wow that was a long read. Started this morning, continued on my lunch hour, just finished to here. I take a few things away from this thread:

    1) OP, though I agree that the pairing of that top and shorts was not the best, IMO it is a completely appropriate outfit for a BBQ. I'm glad you talked to your husband :flowerforyou:

    2) Honor and obey no matter what?? :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    3) This one is the most important: No cat GIFs? Not one? :frown:
  • egrusy
    egrusy Posts: 196 Member
    *oops, wrong, sorry*

    Strong first post.

    (always wanted to say that).

    My husband's account :blushing: I log for him (completely willingly; I actually enjoy it) and forgot I was "him" :laugh:
  • Natmarie73
    Natmarie73 Posts: 287 Member
    Anyway... My profile photo is now one of the outfit in question...

    13870370315_afc9dd748f_o.jpgImagePlease

    Is that it? Pfffft perfectly fine. From your description I was imagining you were going to rock up looking like Miley Cyrus or something.

    BUT - I do agree with other posters who have suggested discussing with your husband why he is uncomfortable with you wearing it.






    [/quote]
  • Natmarie73
    Natmarie73 Posts: 287 Member
    Okay... Here we go...

    I'll try to address all of the broad answers that have been posted here. Though, I'll just quickly put a huge thank you out there to everyone here who's been sincere and not flat out insulting me or the situation. I really appreciate the helpful feedback! As for those saying that I'm tacky, trying to dress like a teenager, trying to make my husband jealous, just flat out seeking attention, or too thin... I'm sorry that this thread has put you in a bad mood. Would you like a flower? :flowerforyou:

    My husband generally doesn't have a lot to say about fashion or his opinions on it. Every now and then he'll say an outfit is ridiculous, but he doesn't insult the wearer of the outfit or tell me that he won't be seen with me in it. This was the first time he's really spoken up much about the matter. There have been a couple of times where he's said that my outfit (for going to clubs and such) is sexy and that he's gonna have to 'keep me close', but he says this with a smile and a wink. I ended up wearing a different top with the shorts to the party that we went to Saturday. Once again, it was not a work party nor was it a 'cocktail' or anything close to a 'semi-formal' event. Our hosts/friends were wearing jeans and t-shirts (I believe the wife in question was wearing a semi-deep v-neck form-fitting jersey top with jean shorts (normal length shorts).

    I did bring it up to him again and what was bothering him, and he basically just said the same thing he'd said before. He said he'd thought it might cause some jealousy and he didn't others to feel bad. He also said that he only felt it was possibly inappropriate to wear around friends and not inappropriate for going to the bar. He did apologize too, telling me he didn't realize that it had bothered me enough to still be thinking about it and told me that I should be the one who decides what I should wear.

    I think there are good points in how to respect your spouse, but there are also good points in how you shouldn't have to change or alter your behavior (if it's not harmful) in order to please their every whim or insecurity. I'd like to find some happy middle ground where I'm comfortable and happy, but I'm also not disrespecting the person I care for. I let my husband dress as he likes and I let him do what he wants as far as hair/weight things go. On occasion he'll ask if his outfit is 'dressy enough' and I'll give him feedback, but I generally don't concern myself with how he presents himself in public. Now.. if we were going to a funeral and he put on a shirt with naked woman and swear words all over it, I'd probably speak up (he would never do that, but that's an example).

    As for the questions of my ability to wear this outfit at 29, I suppose there's something more to address there. Yes, it could be seen as a 'young person's outfit'. I get that. Maybe I'm in denial, but I didn't feel like I was dressing like a 17 year old when I put it on. I don't think it necessarily draws a bunch of negative attention to myself in an outdoor bar on a hot day. Maybe it would and I just don't know.. Either way, I guess I'll just say I have questionable taste. I wouldn't wear the outfit to a work function, a dressy or even semi-dressy event, or a family gathering (though I wouldn't be ashamed to be seen by family while in the outfit).

    Glad to hear it's all sorted and your hubby isn't the jealous, meglomaniac, controlling, nazi, fashion police everyone was making him out to be :wink: Sounds like you two have a great marriage there.
  • golfmanwl
    golfmanwl Posts: 69
    In my humble opinion, if you have a need to "flaunt" it, there is something wrong. Especially if you are married or in a committed relationship. Why the need for outside approval? Why the need for the approval or attention of others? You know who flaunt it?.....hookers, trying to entice their johns. All too often, women (even young women and teens) today dress like street walkers. Go out to a club and it's all skin tight, low cut, and short, short, short.

    IMHO, there is a difference between dressing to look nice, be attractive looking even, and "flaunting it". It's a fine line, but there is a line, IMHO.

    Women, and especially girls, just don't stop to think or realize what the fashion industry is doing to females....how they are sexualizing and objectifying them, as if their bodies were all that mattered, all that women were good for. That it's often other women doing this, under the guise of "empowerment", is shameful.

    Think about it.....why does Victoria's Secret have "Pink" as their product brand? What else is associated with that on a sexual level? What about the brand Juicy...why that word? Why do both of those companies (and others) choose those kinds of words? Why do they always put those words across the butt portion of shorts, sweats, pants and the like? Why do they alwasy choose to put them across the breasts? Why not down along the side of the leg? Why not down the arm of a shirt, or the back? Why not across the shin on pants? Why not somewhere else?

    Sure, it could all just be coincidental, but you'd be a fool to think that. It's all marketing...and they are marketing sex to women, sexualizing women as much (and as early) as possible. Some stores have even gotten flak for marketing thongs to pre-teens.

    While I don't exactly agree 100% with everything the following woman says, she does make some valid points to think about:

    http://youtu.be/z3kU0crua1E
  • golfmanwl
    golfmanwl Posts: 69
    13870370315_afc9dd748f_o.jpg

    BTW, IMHO, that is a perfectly fine outfit to attend a BBQ in, and is in no way flaunting anything.
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
    In my humble opinion, if you have a need to "flaunt" it, there is something wrong. Especially if you are married or in a committed relationship. Why the need for outside approval? Why the need for the approval or attention of others? You know who flaunt it?.....hookers, trying to entice their johns. All too often, women (even young women and teens) today dress like street walkers. Go out to a club and it's all skin tight, low cut, and short, short, short.

    IMHO, there is a difference between dressing to look nice, be attractive looking even, and "flaunting it". It's a fine line, but there is a line, IMHO.

    Women, and especially girls, just don't stop to think or realize what the fashion industry is doing to females....how they are sexualizing and objectifying them, as if their bodies were all that mattered, all that women were good for. That it's often other women doing this, under the guise of "empowerment", is shameful.

    Think about it.....why does Victoria's Secret have "Pink" as their product brand? What else is associated with that on a sexual level? What about the brand Juicy...why that word? Why do both of those companies (and others) choose those kinds of words? Why do they always put those words across the butt portion of shorts, sweats, pants and the like? Why do they alwasy choose to put them across the breasts? Why not down along the side of the leg? Why not down the arm of a shirt, or the back? Why not across the shin on pants? Why not somewhere else?

    Sure, it could all just be coincidental, but you'd be a fool to think that. It's all marketing...and they are marketing sex to women, sexualizing women as much (and as early) as possible. Some stores have even gotten flak for marketing thongs to pre-teens.

    While I don't exactly agree 100% with everything the following woman says, she does make some valid points to think about:

    http://youtu.be/z3kU0crua1E

    They do make them with the word going down the leg, but it's not as popular. I hear what you are saying, but they make these things because women love to wear them and they've found a niche. I disagree with the 'Pink' being overtly sexual though. Pink has been a 'girly' color for decades.

    BTW, they make padded bras for elementary school girls. I've seen them at WalMart. THAT is sad IMO.