how would you feel?
Replies
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Strip clubs rock my socks... and make me pitch a tent. I'm all for it.0
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I'd be pissed that he didn't take me with him.
This!0 -
When I was in my twenties and insecure about my appearance and my relationship, I would have tried to be all controlling and bossy. My husband would have just ignored me and assumed that he was an adult capable of making his own decisions. Eventually I would have had to let it go because feeling angry would only hurt me, and make him think that I'm irrational or experiencing TOM.
Now that I'm in my forties, I wouldn't tell him not to go because I think I'm beautiful and that out relationship is strong. If I did forbid him to go, I would feel stupid and ashamed of myself for trying to control that wonderful, sexy, grown-up man of mine:)0 -
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Yea everybody I did not even see the twist of the Mr-t haircut coming. I nearly died wheb he walked thru the door. Like seriously what sort of strip club does topless haircuts. I couldn't believe it when the paper had a story about it on the net.
And for the people saying I should have gone with him. Yea I probably normally would have. In fact I had been saying for a long time before I got pregnant about us going together because Id love to but it never happened. We'd both never been before so part of me is kinda pissed that he went with his mates.
Other part of me was really upset because it was just sprung on us. Like he was ready and gone within half hour of the call. And yes it's probably my own insecurities. But when your pregnant you don't always feel pretty and when ya partners going to look at other girls naked bodies it kinda makes it worse. That kinda really hurt me alot and that's why I asked him not to go.
Interestingly, I wonder if part of you being upset is because you didn't go together? Girl, you can still go with that baby in you!
The suddenness might be the jarring aspect of why you're upset, and if you had just asked him not to go within minutes of these spontaneous plans, I can also see him not really processing why it's an issue with you... particularly if you haven't shared your feelings with him like you have with us.
I do wonder, though; if you knew for weeks he was going, would you have been as upset, or do you think you would have stewed over it more?0 -
It was a last minute thing. He's mate rang and said he and his missus had tickets to go to the titti bar. In all honesty my partner asked me to go with but I don't believe it's a place for a pregnant woman. In saying this I said is it a titti bar which here is just topless barmaids or the strip club. He said titti bar and he still in his drunkenness saya that's where he believed he was going to. I wasn't happy about him even going there because to be honest I don't think it's appropriate that I'm at hone with our 2 children and pregnant and he's going to look at other women's body's. I asked him not to go but he wanted to go anyway. I specifically said we'll don't go anywhere near the strip club.
Anyway apparently his mate meant the strip club. I didn't find this out until much later. They said they were going for 2-3 hours and come back after about 6ish. Anyway he spent way more money then he was supposed to. I rang him while he was out and told him to stop getting money out. He said he was getting a haircut. When I got off the phone I looked up titti bar haircuts and it so happens the strip club does topless haircuts. He swears she had lingerie on though and that his 2 friends were in the room. So he come home with a kinda Mr-t style haircut sides are shaved with a razor he has a pretty long strip right down the middle of his head. I hate it.
That's the full story.
HOW ARE YOU NOT LAUGHING AT A MR T HAIRCUT FROM A TOPLESS CHICK????
OMG, I'd piss myself.
But anyhow, sounds like what you're really feeling is disrespected. The nudity itself isn't really the issue. It's the lying to you, lack of communication, money you didn't have to spend on other women's tittis, etc.
But still... HOW ARE YOU NOT LAUGHING??
Talk to him. I'd actually be more mad about the dishonesty than anything.
Thankyou. You've actually put into words how I feel. I do feel betrayed and really pissed that he did not give two ****s about how it made me feel.
And the the Mr-t haircut sooooooo not funny if I actually forgive him for being an *kitten* I'll have to put a paper bag over his head just to sleep with him0 -
Yea everybody I did not even see the twist of the Mr-t haircut coming. I nearly died wheb he walked thru the door. Like seriously what sort of strip club does topless haircuts. I couldn't believe it when the paper had a story about it on the net.
And for the people saying I should have gone with him. Yea I probably normally would have. In fact I had been saying for a long time before I got pregnant about us going together because Id love to but it never happened. We'd both never been before so part of me is kinda pissed that he went with his mates.
Other part of me was really upset because it was just sprung on us. Like he was ready and gone within half hour of the call. And yes it's probably my own insecurities. But when your pregnant you don't always feel pretty and when ya partners going to look at other girls naked bodies it kinda makes it worse. That kinda really hurt me alot and that's why I asked him not to go.
Have you told him all this?0 -
He's spending the family money in a way that violates your trust. I say it's time for a nice pricy day at the spa and shopping spree. Don't forget to show some body parts to different men for good measure. Cuz equality.
I think resentment and revenge are ugly. Spa days should be about peace and joy.0 -
Ok ladies would you feel if you were at home pregnant and your partner went to the strippers when you specifically asked them not to?
And guys what do you think from a man's point of view?
Depends on how hot the strippers were and how much a happy ending would cost.0 -
Gosh I don't even know what to say about that! There'd be a huge problem for sure, preggers or not. That being said, I purposely chose to marry a man who has the same type of mind set as me about that sort of thing. If I'd married/was in long term with a guy I knew was into that sort of thing I wouldn't really be able to say much about it. I'd probably still be mad, but I knew going in. If he all of a sudden changed and started doing these things I'd probably have a fit. Because that's not fair. I married a person with certain characteristics for a reason.0
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Ok ladies would you feel if you were at home pregnant and your partner went to the strippers when you specifically asked them not to?
And guys what do you think from a man's point of view?
Depends on how hot the strippers were and how much a happy ending would cost.
Happy endings are free at mine. Why? Because I boned the stripper.0 -
Ok ladies would you feel if you were at home pregnant and your partner went to the strippers when you specifically asked them not to?
And guys what do you think from a man's point of view?
Depends on how hot the strippers were and how much a happy ending would cost.
Happy endings are free at mine. Why? Because I boned the stripper.
You only think it was free.0 -
And the the Mr-t haircut sooooooo not funny if I actually forgive him for being an *kitten* I'll have to put a paper bag over his head just to sleep with him
*dying*0 -
I'd be pissed that he didn't take me with him.
^This. I don't care about that kind of stuff, and I like to go myself. But if he can't let it go for you for a short time period, then that is a problem that needs to be addressed.0 -
Yea everybody I did not even see the twist of the Mr-t haircut coming. I nearly died wheb he walked thru the door. Like seriously what sort of strip club does topless haircuts. I couldn't believe it when the paper had a story about it on the net.
And for the people saying I should have gone with him. Yea I probably normally would have. In fact I had been saying for a long time before I got pregnant about us going together because Id love to but it never happened. We'd both never been before so part of me is kinda pissed that he went with his mates.
Other part of me was really upset because it was just sprung on us. Like he was ready and gone within half hour of the call. And yes it's probably my own insecurities. But when your pregnant you don't always feel pretty and when ya partners going to look at other girls naked bodies it kinda makes it worse. That kinda really hurt me alot and that's why I asked him not to go.
Honestly? I think you're ok.
I think your request for him not to go was valid, and he should have listened to you. And now that he looks like an idiot..well... you have every right to say I Told You So for the next few weeks. But you don't want to make this a bigger issue than it is. If he's a good man who loves you and cares for you, that's what matters most.
But still, you're mad. You have every right to be. You need a little something for you to even the score.
Post pics of his head. Do it. We'll laugh and you'll feel better and he doesn't even have to know. Serves him right anyway.
Agreed.0 -
Yea everybody I did not even see the twist of the Mr-t haircut coming. I nearly died wheb he walked thru the door. Like seriously what sort of strip club does topless haircuts. I couldn't believe it when the paper had a story about it on the net.
And for the people saying I should have gone with him. Yea I probably normally would have. In fact I had been saying for a long time before I got pregnant about us going together because Id love to but it never happened. We'd both never been before so part of me is kinda pissed that he went with his mates.
Other part of me was really upset because it was just sprung on us. Like he was ready and gone within half hour of the call. And yes it's probably my own insecurities. But when your pregnant you don't always feel pretty and when ya partners going to look at other girls naked bodies it kinda makes it worse. That kinda really hurt me alot and that's why I asked him not to go.
That's really unfortunate, and I'm sorry that you feel that this scenario reflects negatively on your body. Whether or not that's the case in your man's mind, it's still a crappy feeling and I empathize. Those are the kinds of feelings you should talk about with him. If you explain to him that him going to a strip bar while you are pregnant and dealing with body issues is emotionally hurtful for you, he may be more inclined to understand and do a solid by skipping those activities. Relationships are give and take, not necessarily trying to always figure out who's "right" or "wrong".
Issues aside, strip clubs can be a lot of fun (for men AND women) so I hope you get to experience it someday with your man. IF you're genuinely interested. If you're not, that's OK too. You don't have to feign enthusiasm to please him. Just be aware that your dislike for those places will probably not affect how he feels about those places. He will likely still want to go anyway, and you should be prepared for a respectful conversation if that issue arises. Be honest, genuine, and non-judgmental. My boyfriend and I healthily enjoy things like porn and strip clubs both together and solo (or with friends). As long as the two of you can agree on your limitations and general moral standing, there's no reason you can't have fun. :flowerforyou:
Side note - A MR. T HAIRCUT. WHAT.0 -
He's spending the family money in a way that violates your trust. I say it's time for a nice pricy day at the spa and shopping spree. Don't forget to show some body parts to different men for good measure. Cuz equality.
Entertainment money should be spent as one chooses, but he didn't go showing his body parts.
Typical muggle.0 -
He's spending the family money in a way that violates your trust. I say it's time for a nice pricy day at the spa and shopping spree. Don't forget to show some body parts to different men for good measure. Cuz equality.
Entertainment money should be spent as one chooses, but he didn't go showing his body parts.
Typical muggle.
Well, his scalp is showing from the Mr. T hair cut...0 -
I just Googled strip club barbers and this is a real thing. How did I not know about this before?
Oh and i agree with what odus said exactly just so I'm being helpful to OP and not just everyone in this thread wondering if they really can get a haircut at a strip club.
whenever my boyfriend comes home with a high and tight we joke about him going to the topless barber0 -
It was a last minute thing. He's mate rang and said he and his missus had tickets to go to the titti bar. In all honesty my partner asked me to go with but I don't believe it's a place for a pregnant woman. In saying this I said is it a titti bar which here is just topless barmaids or the strip club. He said titti bar and he still in his drunkenness saya that's where he believed he was going to. I wasn't happy about him even going there because to be honest I don't think it's appropriate that I'm at hone with our 2 children and pregnant and he's going to look at other women's body's. I asked him not to go but he wanted to go anyway. I specifically said we'll don't go anywhere near the strip club.
Anyway apparently his mate meant the strip club. I didn't find this out until much later. They said they were going for 2-3 hours and come back after about 6ish. Anyway he spent way more money then he was supposed to. I rang him while he was out and told him to stop getting money out. He said he was getting a haircut. When I got off the phone I looked up titti bar haircuts and it so happens the strip club does topless haircuts. He swears she had lingerie on though and that his 2 friends were in the room. So he come home with a kinda Mr-t style haircut sides are shaved with a razor he has a pretty long strip right down the middle of his head. I hate it.
That's the full story.
Ok, this thread just got much better after reading this part.0 -
When my boyfriend mentioned he wanted to go to the strip club...
I was hurt but tried to use it as fuel to better myself. The reason I didn't want him going was because I was insecure about my own body. I was scared he would never find me sexy again, after seeing the girls at the strip joint.
I wanted to be the woman who was giving him these visual pleasures, but since he wasn't getting it at home, I couldn't be upset at him for wanting to go.
I lost most of the weight and when I was comfortable, I surprised him with some new lingerie and I gave him the best damn lap dance, I could muster..and he hasn't asked to go back since.0 -
Yea I sorta posted this after he got home and his drunkenness and my hormones made it not real pretty:ohwell: throw in a stupid haircut and it's ugly
Seriously when he wakes up in the morning he may regret a few things thay happened when he got home (no for you dirty minded people not that) I hope he also has a he'll of a hangover and looks in the mirror and thinks WTF!!!0 -
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I want to go. My husband doesn't enjoy going to strip clubs because he doesn't trust himself to behave respectfully to me (even if I'm not there!) in that situation. That is his choice. And I can go to strip clubs any time because he doesn't care. I normally go every couple of years or so with my BFF.
I need to start googling topless haircuts around here cause that sounds awesome!!
OP - Your feelings are valid because you are feeling them. However, you need to talk to your husband. I know being pregnant can knock things out of whack, and make something that might seem inconsequential into a huge deal, and I know that you will be feeling self-conscious and might have body insecurities.
I'm not EVEN pregnant and i have HUGE body insecurities that can sometimes make talking to me akin to crossing a mine field. My husband cannot fix those issues for me, no matter how hard he tries. I need to go to counseling and face my own issues. IDK if that is something you would want to do, because I don't know enough about you to say you need it or not. But you should consider it. And talk to your husband nicely about how you felt. Use "I" language, and not "you" language.
Finally - let him rock that haircut for a few days, then ask if he could shave it all off.0 -
Yea I sorta posted this after he got home and his drunkenness and my hormones made it not real pretty:ohwell: throw in a stupid haircut and it's ugly
Seriously when he wakes up in the morning he may regret a few things thay happened when he got home (no for you dirty minded people not that) I hope he also has a he'll of a hangover and looks in the mirror and thinks WTF!!!
Please get back to us once he wakes up and you talk to him!
And pic, please! While he's sleeping!0 -
Okay, my opinion on this one is a bit extreme one way so you take it how you want, or just leave it.
I wouldn't care if I was pregnant or not, what the circumstances were or what his excuse was - If I told him not to go and he went, I would be pissed! If he were ever in a place like that without my knowing/my consent there would be some problems afterwards.
This being said, I don't think I would ever give my man permission to be in a place like that and if you knew my husband you would know he is the type that has absolutely zero desire to be in a place like that. He was in the Army 8 years and was exposed to things like that constantly and he avoided them like the plague. So, if my husband went somewhere like that I would really have to question who he was.
Lol. I bet you also make your husband sit down to pee so he doesn't dribble on the toilet rim.
LOL0 -
I would buy some sexy lingerie. .. and make a personal strip club for him in our bedroom... that must work :laugh: :drinker:0
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Not sure how much talking we will do when he wakes up because it went badly :-/
On the brighter side. Seeing as he's such a heavy sleeper especially after he's been drinking part of me wants to go in with a pair of scissors and randomly hack at his remaining hair so when he wakes up I can say "see this is why you don't get haircuts in strip clubs". I could be sooo evil but won't :devil:0 -
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Not sure how much talking we will do when he wakes up because it went badly :-/
On the brighter side. Seeing as he's such a heavy sleeper especially after he's been drinking part of me wants to go in with a pair of scissors and randomly hack at his remaining hair so when he wakes up I can say "see this is why you don't get haircuts in strip clubs". I could be sooo evil but won't :devil:
I know a better plan....
POST HIS PICS!
POST HIS PICS!
Sweetheart you must. I won't stop until this happens. Important work is being completely ignored for this cause. C'mon, have a laugh with us at his expense. My devilish impulses aside I really do think it would be a good way for you to get back at him without doing any real damage.
C'mon...you know you wanna...
You remind me of this quote, "I have a puckish side that will not be denied."0
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