what mean/thoughtless comment has been said to you before?

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  • HereLieWe
    HereLieWe Posts: 233 Member
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    I've been called a lot of things, but none were as embarrassing as when I asked this kid to the dance in seventh grade. I thought he'd be nice to me, but instead he said something along the lines of "No, because if I go out with you people will laugh at me." A few days later, during a relay race, he also stole my spot on the relay team because apparently I was too fat to run. I was like fifteen pounds overweight .__.
  • 1Cor1510
    1Cor1510 Posts: 413 Member
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    At my son's birthday party, my husband took a cupcake from my hand and said, "Do you really think you need that?"
    ^^This, my hubs can't eat certain sugars, so he at almost 40 still wears high school size clothes, and I have had him do this to me at family functions. It is humiliating. You better believe it was "discussed".
  • Wonderob
    Wonderob Posts: 1,372 Member
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    Perhaps I'm not being clear. It's not been a very good day for me at all, and I am struggling right now.

    I never meant that all women who ask how they look are automatically fishing for compliments. I just meant that asking "am I fat?" is a loaded and unfair question - if you're not willing to hear the truth.

    But apparently that was all a joke that I'm too dumb to get and though I have incredibly thick skin, sitting in the surgical waiting room and then by my mom's hospital bed all day has worn me out to the point that comments in this thread have brought me to tears, and the internet isn't worth crying over, so I'll bow out.

    Sorry to hear that,

    Thank you.

    I came back to generally apologize for being a d*ck on this thread. I had no business being on the internet last night and it showed. I was genuinely trying to give my opinion but it came out pretty self righteous and obnoxious. So, I'm sorry.

    There was the usual few differences of opinions - I don't think you did anything wrong though to be honest
  • cccoursey
    cccoursey Posts: 116 Member
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    After being super excited about losing a lot of body fat. I had gone from 36% to 25%. The one person I expected to care the most, the one that had been most adamant about the effort I was making to better myself, texted me this:

    "Its not like anyone will ever care anyways. You are old."

    ....I wanted to eat everything and die. However, I think it did more to solidify my resolve. I know I look better, I feel better, and now that I know what I did wrong I am slowly regaining strength from the muscle I lost.

    I will be the best version of me. It still hurts when I remember that or when people try to discourage me. This is not who I want to be. I will change that. And not just physically.
  • Yagisama
    Yagisama Posts: 592 Member
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    When my dad met my boyfriend for the first time, he said "You a chubby chaser, then?" Thanks, dad. (A man who isn't exactly an Adonis...)

    Dear lord. Grown men say stuff like that?
  • Yagisama
    Yagisama Posts: 592 Member
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    I dont understand why people get so upset when they get called fat, when they are indeed fat. I am 5'4 and 256 pounds. I know im fat. If someone were to come up to me and say You are fat, I would look at them and say no **** captain obvious. I understand there are more hurtful ways of saying it, but if you are indeed fat, then it is what it is.

    I'd counter by saying - Im not sure why anyone would then feel the need to point out someone is fat. If we indeed all know - then does hurling an insult from a moving car help?

    There are plenty of things that people are - and know they are (different races, speech impediment, different religions, dress horribly, poor, mentally ill, developmentally challenged, ugly, scars, etc...) and it would be rude as **** to point that **** out to their face in most cases.

    A concerned family member is one thing - but random idiots - hell to the nah.

    Exactly. What does it add to the conversation by pointing it out. It's not like the person doesn't know and they're just waiting for someone to point it out to them.
  • nainai0585
    nainai0585 Posts: 199 Member
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    After gaining the college 40 (or whatever number it is) along with 4 pregnancies, I was an overweight adult whereas I was always a thin and fit child/teen. No one said a word to me about my weight. It was seen as normal, and baby weight that I never lost. There was ALWAYS an excuse from all family members about genetics, pregnancy, parenthood (eg: not enough time in the day to cook so take-out was an excellent choice), etc for why I am fat (along with the rest of my family and my husband's family) and why I need to stay that way.
    It wasn't until I lost all the excess "mama weight" and was FINALLY in a healthy weight range for my height
    (136lbs at my lowest, 5'7 - gained 20 lbs now since I am 20 weeks pregnant) that I heard, "YOU LOOK DISGUSTING!!!" "You MUST be anorexic because I can see your collar bones" "We're going to a buffet so you BETTER eat your money's worth (meaning that I MUST eat 3+ FULL plates)" "Ewww, all I can feel is bones when I hug you", etc etc
  • fat2skinny50
    fat2skinny50 Posts: 104 Member
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    I made the comment once that i needed new clothes, a family member asked me if I was going to see "Omar the Tent Builder" to get my clothes. They thought it was funny, I thought it was just mean.
  • sherambler
    sherambler Posts: 303 Member
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    I know some people have been kind of harsh on this thread, saying they don't like the topic, but I do. I like knowing that other people were made fun of, judged by their family, and picked on by coworkers. Not that I WANT people to be be picked on, but it makes me feel not so alone in that regard. I guess it makes me feel less abnormal and somehow less embarrassed about being picked on.
  • marisarinde
    marisarinde Posts: 54
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    If someone truly loves you, they wouldn't want to change a thing about you. Period.

    Except underwear, change that at least once a week.

    That's hilarious haha I agree
  • CarolinaGirlinVA
    CarolinaGirlinVA Posts: 1,512 Member
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    After being super excited about losing a lot of body fat. I had gone from 36% to 25%. The one person I expected to care the most, the one that had been most adamant about the effort I was making to better myself, texted me this:

    "Its not like anyone will ever care anyways. You are old."

    ....I wanted to eat everything and die. However, I think it did more to solidify my resolve. I know I look better, I feel better, and now that I know what I did wrong I am slowly regaining strength from the muscle I lost.

    I will be the best version of me. It still hurts when I remember that or when people try to discourage me. This is not who I want to be. I will change that. And not just physically.

    You are NOT old! I think you look fantastic btw :)
  • Rocky791
    Rocky791 Posts: 52 Member
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    [/quote]
    Women never are. Trust me.
    [/quote]


    Oh believe me I know that women can be the same way. Just coming out of an "I hate men" phase so don't mind me. I'm honestly just tired of shallow people in general.
  • conqueringsquidlette
    conqueringsquidlette Posts: 383 Member
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    Husband told me I wasn't his type and that he was into fit girls.

    It's not really mean or thoughtless, but it sure hurt.
  • Rocky791
    Rocky791 Posts: 52 Member
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    Husband told me I wasn't his type and that he was into fit girls.

    It's not really mean or thoughtless, but it sure hurt.

    That qualifies as thoughtless to me...
  • conqueringsquidlette
    conqueringsquidlette Posts: 383 Member
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    I guess I think of thoughtless as things people say that that are unintentionally hurtful, but I guess it can cover candid conversations that are held without regard to somebody else's feelings too.

    This was a candid statement that was solicited. I don't remember what the conversation was about anymore, though. Just that part of it. :(

    Edit: Ah wait, I remember now. It was about lingerie and why buying it didn't matter. Now I'm kinda sad again. I wish I hadn't thought about that.
  • Rocky791
    Rocky791 Posts: 52 Member
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    Without regard to somebody else's feeling - exactly. My college boyfriend also told me something similar - and a few guys since. Gotta wonder why they feel the need to do that and how they can possibly think it will go over well. No woman wants to feel like she's being settled for.
  • Rocky791
    Rocky791 Posts: 52 Member
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    And I was at my all time lowest weight (due to extreme stress that led to me not eating) when I was with my college boyfriend and I still wasn't "hot" in his eyes - he actually told me that... after mentioning how hot his high school gf was.
  • Rocky791
    Rocky791 Posts: 52 Member
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    Edit: Ah wait, I remember now. It was about lingerie and why buying it didn't matter. Now I'm kinda sad again. I wish I hadn't thought about that.

    Sorry it brought up a painful memory. :( It's comforting to know that other people have dealt with the same stuff, but probably not good to dwell on it too much.
  • talentedmom56
    talentedmom56 Posts: 14 Member
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    I was only 17 and a large young lady . My dad was a golfer and and I told him I'd like to learn. H looked at me, smirked and said, "Your boobs are too big." I never golfed again until I was 36 and met my husband (now deceased).
  • Wakeup2014
    Wakeup2014 Posts: 22 Member
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    I guess I think of thoughtless as things people say that that are unintentionally hurtful, but I guess it can cover candid conversations that are held without regard to somebody else's feelings too.

    This was a candid statement that was solicited. I don't remember what the conversation was about anymore, though. Just that part of it. :(

    Edit: Ah wait, I remember now. It was about lingerie and why buying it didn't matter. Now I'm kinda sad again. I wish I hadn't thought about that.


    Hugs!!

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